Can't Be Happening
No. It wasn't true. It couldn't be. It was.
But why?
I couldn't get the thought out of my head as i dropped my cell phone on my bed and stared blankly at the window that viewed a dark night.
Why was this happening?
I thought to myself, 'This is a dream, he can't be-'
My heart stopped as my mind wouldn't let me finish the sentence. I just wouldn't let that happen.
I walked out of my room, my feet feeling like two-hundred pound weights. As if some one had put concrete in my shoes. My eyes struggled the fight to let my tears fall, and some of them won... slipping down my ivory cheek and underneath my chin.
Why was this happening to me? Why?
Roxas walked through the hall about the same time i was. He stopped in front of me with a small frown, until he saw the look in my eyes. I opened my mouth to apologize, but he interjected, grabbing my arm.
"Are you okay?"
"I... N-... Um..."
"What's the matter? Want me to get mom?"
I shook my head, and then pushed him aside, grabbing my keys that hung on the hanger. They were cold in the palm of my hand, and i squeezed them so hard that they nearly cut into my skin. Was i that afraid?
I walked outside. Great, it was raining.
Or was it?
The drops felt a little more like piercing needles, driving themselves into my body and trying to pin me down. I had to go see him... I had to make sure.
The ride to the hospital was brutal. I could barely concentrate with that thought that was still barred into my mind. I don't know what i would do if it was true.
The doctors looked at me, soaking wet, and eyes swollen red from crying. Some of them even tried getting my attention, pulling on my sleeve to get me to stop... but i kept on walking.
It was like being asleep almost. I had no idea what i was doing, or where i was going. My beating heart seemed to lead me to the despair.
I was hoping for a night mare. It would at least better than the truth.
Then i saw her. I saw Aerith, standing at the door with Yuffie and Tifa, who looked over at me and turned pale.
Yuffie approached me first, her eyes a little swollen and her hands shaking.
Oh god... it was true.
"He's not holding on. He wants to see you before-" she lost it then, and i saw her struggle to keep her knees from buckling.
I watched Aerith cling to Tifa, something i never thought she would do... but i guess she just couldn't stand.
"A tree... he hit it... The car... I don't even know how he didn't die instantly." Yuffie stumbled over her words, but i could barely hear them over Aerith's crying hysterically.
I would have to go in there eventually... He needed me.
I walked slowly, like before, and stopped slightly at the door. It felt so strange to be here.
An ominous feeling took me over as i walked all the way in, and i saw him.
He looked horrible. His whole face was completely white, and the whole left side was covered in bandages. His body looked mangled, and i sobbed slightly as i got closer to him.
The way he opened his eyes was like something was trying to pin them down. And i could hardly bear the sight of it.
He smiled, despite his critical condition, and lifted his hand to my arm.
"Cloud. You came."
This can't be happening to me. No. Please if there is a god he won't do this to me.
"Thank you."
"I... Zack..."
Zack shook his head, closing his eyes a little bit. My heart stopped again, and i thought that i had just lost him.
"You're so warm, Cloud. I'm so glad to see you."
"N-no..."
Zack opened his eyes again, knitting his brows.
I clenched my fists and wiped my eyes angrily, "You better not leave me... I came here to see you!"
Laugh, "You're so young. And so immature."
"Stop saying it like that!" My eyes overflowed with tears, and i couldn't see but the outline of Zack's body.
He was slipping away, i could feel it as he still held my arm... Just a little loosely now.
"Take care of yourself Cloud. I love you..."
I felt my last tears slip down my cheeks, and Zack's hand fell from me. He was gone... What was i going to do?
No... Why?
I grabbed his shoulders, shaking him, "N-no! No! Damn it wake up! No!" i screamed. I couldn't have lost him.
But i did... and i fell to my knees for the first time, holding onto Zack's lifeless arm, crying and kissing against it. He was going cold... and i could no longer feel his heartbeat in his wrist.
Why did this happen to me?