And Then There Was You
Set immediately following the episode Still. This is the obligatory reunion fic between Carol and Daryl and I hope you all enjoy.
A/N Love goes to my beta, spikeslovebite. Thank you so very much dearest.
Daryl trudged heavily through the undergrowth of the forest, his careless steps unlike the near silent sure gait he normally used while hunting and tracking. Beth moved more quietly behind him, a telling sign of the turmoil still roiling in his mind. It had helped some talking to her about his past, revealing things he'd only spoken of with one other person. It had also brought up anguish he couldn't share, anger he had to tamp down.
Beth was just a little girl, after all. Hadn't she proved it with her drinking game? She didn't need his insecurities, his anger, his heartbreak. She needed strength to help find her family, or any of their extended family that might be left. It was a must to shove his own desperation to the back of the line. His own longing.
Carol.
She wasn't there. She wasn't around because Rick had forced her to leave. Daryl hadn't even had a chance to process the announcement before the Governor ripped their fences down. He didn't believe for one minute that Carol had changed so much she would kill two people in cold blood, if she'd done it at all.
Now he was in the middle of nowhere, too many things cluttering his head with no one but Beth to talk to. He had no clear direction to aid in finding Carol, and it was ripping through his soul with searing desolation. He would try to help Beth keep her focus, help her find anyone else that might have survived. Then, he would be able to take care of his own needs. He would be able to search her out. Dead or alive, he would find her one day and finally be whole, whether it was his end or his beginning.
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Carol walked slowly down the tracks with Judith clutched protectively to her chest. Mentally, she struggled with the reality she'd come upon while tracking footprints as Daryl had taught her. When she'd first found the small prints she'd been elated to know some of the children had survived the horrifying scene at the prison. Huge boot prints had merged with the little ones and she'd set out to find which adult was leading the children away from the devastation.
Seeing Lizzie with her hand over Judith's little mouth, smothering the life right out of the baby, was like a knife to her soul. She had tried guiding the girl, tried teaching her that walkers were their enemy. Instead, Lizzie had turned on their own people, killing Karen and David.
Carol believed it was her fault. Her own shortcomings had led the girl to feel she had to kill two living, breathing human beings to keep herself and her sister safe. That was the reason Carol had taken the blame. It was the reason she'd burned the bodies, and the reason she'd told Rick she was the murderer. She truly believed she was the cause of Lizzie's confusion.
There wasn't a doubt in her mind that if she hadn't found their trail, hadn't followed those prints, Judith would not have survived the blatant lack of emotion in Lizzie's eyes. No, the baby she had promised Lori to protect would have been dead at another child's hands. There was more wrong with Lizzie than Carol felt she could comprehend.
She needed to talk to someone about what was happening with the girl, someone who might be able to help her figure out what to do, and in her mind someone was always immediately replaced with Daryl. Not knowing if he made it out of the prison alive was eating away at her insides, like walker's teeth gnashing and shredding her to bits.
Carol desperately needed Daryl, but all she had was Tyreese and she feared what the big man might do to her, to Lizzie, if he found out what had truly happened to Karen. So she kept moving forward, head mired in the depths of darkness as she grasped baby Judith closer to her breast.
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Daryl brought Beth back to the train tracks. Earlier, they had followed some footprints and found nothing but the bodies of walkers and their victims. His plan was to follow the small tracks in hopes of finding one or two of their own people. It was the only thing he had to go on.
Bending down to take a closer look at the trail, he realized there was a new set added to the previous three. Instead of just a man and two child sized prints, he found familiar boot prints in the loose dirt beside the rail. In the back of his mind he knew who they belonged to, but Daryl wouldn't allow himself to believe it. Maybe it was one of the Woodbury folks, another woman he'd never had to track with the same type of boot and shoe size.
Even when he noticed the left foot turned in slightly, as did HERS.
He couldn't let himself hope. Couldn't bring himself to pray. Too afraid it would be dashed into bitter shards of glass grating under his skin, cutting him deeper than any torture his father had ever dished out. No, if he allowed himself to even think it was a possibility, and found he was wrong, it would kill him.
"What're we doin' back here, Daryl? I thought you said it was safer in the woods," Beth questioned with a small hitch in her voice. Seeing the bodies brought back the desolation of the past days.
"Wanted a closer look. Seein' if I might've missed somthin' I was too pissed ta notice before," the hunter answered her honestly. "Cmere and take a look."
Beth bent down beside Daryl and tried to see what he was so focused on. "What? I don't see nothin' but a bunch of scuffed up footprints that are probably from them dead walkers."
"Nah, look closer. See these here? Tha's a big man's print. And these ones are from a couple kids and this last is probably a woman, but could be an older kids too," Daryl voice turned gruffer when pointing out the last. "See how they move off from tha rest like they leavin' the others?"
The young girl tried to see what he was showing her, but it all seemed a muddled mess to her.
"Maybe." She shrugged.
"No maybes 'bout this. They're movin' off together as a group and we can try followin' 'em." Daryl stood, moving in the direction of the trail he had found leading down the train tracks.
Maybe, just maybe, he could find someone to protect Beth so he could look for Carol.
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They had had to stop so many times to care for Judith that Carol now believed it would take them five times as long to reach their destination. A few nights spent in the trees on the edge of the railway had proved such. Although, it had given her time to study both girls, to notice the differences between them.
Throughout the journey she had watched Lizzie and Mika closely. Mika was as she'd always been, a sweet little girl who was trying her best to be brave, but Lizzie would have moments where her face would go emotionless, blank. It was as if she was putting on a show for Carol and Tyreese and when she thought no one was looking, she would drop the façade of animated child.
Tyreese was doing an amazing job of keeping them safe with her help, and at one point when the train tracks ran through a small town, had them take a break while he went in search of food, water, and things Judith needed. Now little Judith had a fresh diaper and a belly full of baby food, which made for a much easier and quieter go for all of them.
"Hey, Carol, you think we'll come across any of our group?" Tyreese asked hopefully. It was obvious to her that he was frantic to find his sister. Several times he'd mentioned Sasha and what she might be doing as they traveled down the tracks, never once acting as if he believed her gone, dead.
"You know, Sasha once told me I'd go down long before she did?" Tyreese asked in a wide-eyed, upbeat manner, trying to conceal his own worries. "Said she'd outlive me and to never forget that. I know she's out there right now, helping someone else."
He was such an optimist and Carol had to keep reminding herself that for all her hope she was never given any room to believe in said hope. Not after her beautifully innocent Sophia. But she had to give them what they needed to keep going.
"I bet a lot of them saw the signs and will be there waiting for us," she stated with as much enthusiasm as she could muster as she looked down on baby, Lil' Asskicker. Her mind went straight to Daryl. Straight to her one hope. One love.
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Daryl moved forward with renewed purpose, while Beth walked behind him at a brisk pace, humming to distract herself from the searing burn in her legs as she tried to keep up with him. She knew he was much more centered now than he had been. Something had caught his eye hours before when he was trying to show her what only he could see in the footprints they'd found. Whatever or whoever it was, she would willingly worship them for giving him a target to shoot for and in turn restoring her faith they would find the others.
Before, she'd felt lost, decimated with the constant strain of trying to hold both of them together. Now, there was buoyancy to them, belief in the path they were following. All because Daryl seemed more confident and sure about where he was leading.
Beth was suddenly brought out of her thoughts as Daryl stopped short in front of her. Bracing herself for the worst, Beth looked up for the first time in several hours and gazed past him. Instead of the bloody annihilation she expected, there was some empty water bottles, baby food jars, and a dirty diaper scattered off to the side of the train tracks.
The prospect of these items flared into hopefulness. Judith! Someone who had Judith was in this very spot before them and Beth was brought to silent tears. The tell-tale signs probably meant the man was Rick followed by Carl, and quite possibly Luke or maybe Lizzie and Mika.
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Daryl's heart was in his throat. Lil' Asskicker was alive. She had survived. One of the adults, probably Rick, was making their way with her down the tracks. However, he didn't see Carl's footprints, even if he tried to play off the more familiar boot prints as someone else, they couldn't be Carl's.
Pain flared in his chest. Maybe he was reading them wrong, seeing what he wanted to see. Maybe they were Carl's and if they were, that was good because that meant the boy survived. If it was Rick and Carl then he knew for certain he could leave Beth with them and strike out on his own journey.
Mentally Daryl started preparing himself for this quest, preparing for dropping Beth off with their extended family members and heading off. His steps quickened. Quirking his lips into a semblance of a smile for Beth's sake, he pushed ahead.
Emotions he'd never allowed himself to experience before were bubbling below the surface. Love wasn't blood, wasn't an "I'm all you've got". It was a ready smile, a comforting brush of fingertips over a shoulder, warmth supplied by a blanket being tucked around your already sleeping form, food brought when you were on watch duty, a willing ear, or a teasing laugh as you're called pookie for no apparent reason.
Daryl now knew what love truly could be and wasn't willing to give it up.
He needed absolution. Needed to know what happened to Carol and even if it took the rest of his miserable life, he wouldn't stop fighting to find her…to find his love.
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Carol could see smoke from a contained fire up ahead, maybe four or five more miles. The night was closing in, dusky pink and orange hues stretching across the darkening sky. Their little group had come across more walkers in the last day than any previous and they had to find shelter to stay safe with the increase of monsters milling around. They couldn't risk continuing on with the children to see if the smoke was from the community they sought as night began to settle around them.
Tyreese pointed out a break in the trees surrounding the railway just up ahead. When they reached it, the small amount of light left in the sky illuminated what seemed to be the back of a small house a few hundred yards away.
"You think it's safe?" Carol whispered, so as not to attract unwanted attention.
"It's all we've got." Tyreese answered, walking off the tracks toward it. "Okay, girls, stay quiet and we'll check it out."
As they walked the trees began to open up more and more until they were in a small pasture-like area. So far there seemed to be no activity, human or walker-wise. When they were just a couple of yards away, Carol noticed the little house listed a bit to the right and most of the shutters were either missing or barely hanging on. It had obviously been abandoned before the turn and in her book, that was good.
Tyreese motioned for them to wait while he went in to clear the small shelter. After checking every nook and cranny, the large man motioned for Carol to bring the children in. There was no food in any of the cupboards as she had suspected, but they had enough to last another day or two with what her companion had scavenged up at the last small town.
They took the time to block up the front and back door as well as the door leading from the living room into other areas of the house with whatever broken down furniture they could find, essentially barricading themselves into the one room. Once every one had something to eat and Carol managed to get Judith to sleep, she went about getting Lizzie and Mika down for the night.
"I'm taking first watch, Ty. You get some rest and I'll wake you in about four hours so I can get some sleep," Carol informed him before moving to sit beside a window and stare into the darkness.
"You sure? I can take first watch," he asked unmoving from his position.
"You've taken on the lion's share of things for the last couple of days and I'm too wired to sleep right now anyway." Carol absentmindedly waved him off with her hand never once taking her eyes off the front yard even though she could barely see through the blackness.
She could hear the rustle of clothing as the big man settled down on the floor for the night, but her mind was elsewhere, drifting into the past. Tracing Daryl's face in her mind, she began to call up every moment they had spent in each other's company, from the quarry to the morning he left on the run for medicine that would hopefully save the sick.
With each new image, Carol saw him grow until he'd changed into the group's protector, feeding, clothing, and keeping them safe. She remembered the moment she fell in love with him. It had nothing to do with handing her a pickaxe to cave in her dead husband's head, nor him getting up in the middle of the night to walk the road and look for her daughter. It wasn't when he brought her the Cherokee rose in a bottle, or even his unwavering faith he would find her girl. Those moments meant something, each one building, making her care, making her take notice, but none of them sent love pumping through her veins.
No, the moment she knew she loved him was when he'd yelled at her for not keeping a closer eye on Sophia. Screaming she wasn't his, even as he choked on the words. In that one second, she knew his heart. She saw straight through the rough exterior that he'd used to shield himself and knew that even though he didn't really know her baby girl, he still cared deeply for her. Knew he could never be like Ed. Knew he could love as she did, with every ounce of her soul.
As Carol remembered the brush of Daryl's fingers against the back of her hand while telling her to keep safe before leaving on that last run, she was jolted by a noise coming for the back of the house. A small thud, nothing more, but that thud had her ready for action as she pulled her knife and moved toward her sleeping companions.
A second, much louder thud came as Tyreese was waking from her shaking his foot. Mika sat up with a start and Carol automatically put her hand over the girl's mouth in hopes to keep her quiet.
"We either have walkers bumping into the house, or someone living trying to get in," Carol whispered urgently to Tyreese, who immediately grabbed his own blade.
Suddenly there came a third thudding crash and the ominous sound of splintering wood.
"Stay here with the kids and stay quiet. I'm going in," the big man stated moving some of the items from the door leading into the rest of the house.
Making sure both Mika and Lizzie stayed near Judith, who was still sleeping through the commotion, Carol went to the doorway ready to battle whatever, or whoever had gotten in the back.
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It was getting late and they needed to find shelter soon. The dead kept stumbling from the wilderness along the railroad and Daryl knew they couldn't keep fighting them off without at least a small rest.
Both of them had been going at a brisk pace all day, only stopping to eat once when a large rabbit crossed their path and ended on the point of Daryl's arrow. Now they were both exhausted and starving with geeks coming out of the woodwork.
Spying something off to the right, Beth stopped abruptly and grabbed at Daryl in front of her. Flinching back away from her sudden movement, Daryl glared at her.
"What? I was just trying to get your attention, Mr. Dixon. I thought it might help if I pointed out that," she said smugly as he followed her finger to find a small shack of a house barely visible in the moonlight some distance from the tracks.
Saying nothing, he stormed off in the direction of their shelter for the evening as Beth brought up the rear, keeping quiet and listening for the presence of walkers. She knew something was still tormenting the hunter, something he hadn't told her the other night. He had a purpose, though, and wasn't rotting away in his own self-hatred for what happened to their people, so she decided it best to not push him on it.
Once they reached the back of the dilapidated house, Daryl tried the back door. When it didn't budge, he used his shoulder to ram it as he turned the knob. Again it didn't move, but he also noticed there were no groans coming from inside due to the noise he created.
"Looks like this ole' door might be sturdier than tha rest of tha shack," Daryl joked in a whisper. "Gonna try one more time, then we'll move to tha front."
Beth gave him the barest of nods as he turned back to the problem at hand.
Deciding he needed to use brute force, Daryl took a step back and gathered all of his strength, kicking out. The beautiful sound of wood bursting and splitting reached his ears, and Daryl reared back to do it again.
As the door gave and several items on the other side smashed to the floor, he let out a short whoop of happiness that didn't live long.
"What do you want?" a gruff voice from inside spoke before giving a warning. "We're armed and will fight for what's ours."
"Just lookin' for shelter for the night," Daryl answered, motioning for Beth to get behind him. The voice coming from inside, although low, seemed familiar. "No need for killin'. If'n need be, we'll move on."
"Redneck, is that you?" Tyreese couldn't believe his ears. Daryl's distinct southern drawl was unmistakable.
"Ty?" was the only word the hunter spoke.
"Hold up. Let me get some of this shit outta the way, man." Tyreese began moving things away from the back door.
Carol stood at the entrance to the living room, unsure what was happening. Tyreese seemed to be talking to whoever was outside and then she heard the movement of furniture. Surely he wouldn't let someone in he didn't know?
"Girls, stay here and be still. I'm going to help Ty." Quickly she moved through the small space her companion had cleared earlier and headed down the hallway into the kitchen.
As she reached the back of the house she heard a small, young woman's squeal as dirt and blonde enveloped Tyreese in a hug. Beth. It was Beth, and Carol was so happy she was alive.
"Thought we'd never find anyone else," a familiar growl came with the sounds of worn boots stepping onto the worn wood of the floor. HE was here. HE had survived, and tears pricked Carol's eyes as she sucked in a deep breath.
Just as Carol was about to say something, anything really, Beth squealed again, this time louder as she threw herself at the older woman.
"Carol!" Beth shouted and wrapped her arms around her.
A low wail, like a wounded animal, came from behind Beth and Carol froze mid hug. Releasing Beth, she looked up and saw her hope, her love, standing before her with so much emotion on his face.
"Carol?" Daryl questioned, his knees going weak as his head swam, arm reaching toward her.
"I'm here." She stepped up to save him, placing her hand lightly on his elbow.
Bow roughened fingers reached out, gently brushing Carol's jaw as a whimper broke from Daryl's lips.
"I found you," he spoke with barely a breath, awe written in his eyes.
The End