This fic has been on the back of my mind for some time and I decided to release it. The main character is, Mikey, of course and I wanted it to be an angsty, dramatic, kinda sucidial moment for Mikey, after all the events that occured on 'TMNT'. Hope you guys like it.
Can't Live Anymore
by: Terrell James
Chapter 1: Depression
6:45 A.M.
Mikey was sitting in his bed in the dark, alone, thinking about every single moment that occured since Raph and Leo's fall-out and also, since Leo's departure to Central America a year ago, leaving behind his brothers. Mikey feels as though he was abandoned without any questions at all. Ever since that situation occured, it's like he could've done something to prevent them from splitting up, but he couldn't.
The radio was playing an emo song and all Mikey could do was listen to it, because all the silence has been too much for Mikey, because it reminded him of his brothers going their separate ways.
He sighs heavily and gets himself up, then he looks at the mirror and all he can see are dark circles around his eyes, like he hasn't been sleeping for weeks. He feels a deep resentment towards Leo and Raph fighting with each other and wishes that both of them would just shut up and get at each other's throats all the time.
He retreats back to his bed, then lays down and hides himself in the covers, just to get away from everybody or everything. Then, he heard a door knock and he groaned softly and asked, "What?"
"It's time to wake up, Mikey." Donny said.
Mikey groaned heavily and said, "It's too early, Donny."
Donny sighed heavily and said, "It's almost 7:00."
"Like I could care less...."
Then, an agitated Donny walks in the room and finds Mikey, but he saw nothing. All he can hear is the radio playing some emo rock and then, he noticed something moving around the bed. Donny sucked his lips and then, asked, "Mikey?"
Mikey groaned heavily and then, Donny went around the bed and pulled out the covers and sees a tired Mikey laying there. He asked, "Okay, Mikey. What's with you?"
Mikey turned to Donny and Donny became extremely startled by some dark circles around Mikey's eyes. He asked, "Have you been sleeping at all?"
"Can't sleep. Too depressed."
"About what? You're never depressed."
"I guess now is as good as time as any."
"What are you so depressed about?"
"Don't want to talk about it."
Then, Mikey turns himself away from Donny and then, Donny asked him, "IS this something that had to do with last year?"
There was silence. Mikey didn't respond and felt like he needed some space. Then, he asked Donny, "Can you please leave? I need to be alone."
"Can you at least give me an answer?"
Mikey sighed irritately and replied, "Yeah."
"That was last year and this is this year."
"Sometimes, it feels like last year."
Donny got up and decided to leave the room and then, turned to Mikey and asked, "Are you gonna be awake?"
Mikey let out a moan and then, Donny sighed heavily and left the room with the door closed. Then, Mikey shut off the radio and then, there was silence again. Every ounce of silence has been surrounded by the memories of last year and it has been taking his toll.
He got up out of bed, sat down on the front of the bed and lowered his head down and just sat there in the dark. It's like he's trying to keep the peace between him and his brothers and maybe, just maybe tried to talk some sense into his brothers.
Obviously, it feels like it's failing.
Mikey sighed heavily and then, he heard nothing but silence. It feels as though it's too much silence and he groaned frustratedly and turns on the radio again and they played this punk song that was filled with such angst and troublesome with moody, kinda like he is at this point.
Mikey could hear his heart beating and that it was beating slower and slower and he's been keeping himself away from everyone else for several weeks and he feels as if that no one could understand him more. As a peacemaking turtle he is, there was always this loss of innocence towards him and a full amount of sorrow when not being present towards his brothers, but keeps his personal sorrows away from his brothers and Splinter. The reason; taking the job being Cowabunga Carl for kids, which irriates him a lot. It took it's toll on Mikey the most, even while Leo wasn't around.
It seems as though he was losing the one thing that he's always held so close to; his childhood. He just couldn't accept the fact that he's growing up and that he feels a distance between the older brothers, whilst one was in Central America for a long time and feels as though Donny was the one that he relies on the most, but sometimes, different personalities can sometimes be separate.
With so much depression coming inside of him, he just didn't know if he could ever get used to the fact that Leo left behind his brothers for a full year and it seemed like the one he always looked up to, wasn't around the whole time and feeling like he never came back. He sighed heavily and that he's misunderstood when it comes to relying on his older brothers and he whispered to himself,
"Have you dudes seen my childhood?"
Really sad. Sorry it was short, but I promise that the next chapter, I'll make it a lot longer. Maybe now I'll get some good reviews rather than some '1 out 10' reviews from my previous Mikey fic, "Mikey's Dirty Little Secret." Hopefully, it's a lot better. Stay tuned for more!