Hellooooo everybody! Story about Bowser this time. I just felt as though the bad guy needed a bit of attention, but like every story on the face of this earth, he has a problem… Bowser's a little hungry, but how far will he go to get his food back? Well, you'll just have to read on and find out! I decided to make this a longer oneshot story… first one I tried to write the first chapter but it was way, way too short, so it's a oneshot now! And I know it's been forever since I wrote anything, I have to catch up on that. Enjoy!
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"GRAWW, WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE ARE OUT OF DRUMSTICKS?" Bowser stormed through the hall, breaking down the kitchen doors for the 15th time that week.
"Lord Bowser, it is an honor for you to be in our presence and present such royalty," a Goomba rambled.
"GRRRR, I ordered 57 fiery drumsticks for dinner, totally not a problem for last night, or the morning before, or the day before, or the-"
"But, sir, we found our pantries and refrigerators empty this morning! They have been raided! The food supply's been depleting over the last few nights! There's a food thief in the night… They left but only enough to make a salad… perhaps with a bit of dressing and crutons…"
"YOU IDIOT! Since when have I ever eaten GREENS?" Bowser opened his mouth, and a great fireball welled in his throat, ready to strike the innocent minion. Kamek burst in the room, hearing of Bowser's reported anger, and shoved the minion out of the floor was scorched, leaving an almost slight indent, charring and crumbling. Even that was a bit hot for Bowser- Kamek stepped beside him.
"Your ugliness, I suggest that we look for the drumsticks, instead of destroying your army. Perhaps we look for the Mario Bros. They could have taken our supply to starve us out… perhaps they would know?"
"GAR, perhaps… but they honestly never attack us unless provoked. GWAHAHA, they don't have the willpower without the adrenalin! But we shall go anyway, start with someone else... I have a few ideas on who it could be… We'll see that this rat's smushed to the Underwhere!" And off they went to seek out the thief.
_..._
"Ahaha! I win again!" said Dimentio, leaving Mr. L with the old maid.
"WHAT THE FLAPDOODLE?" L was stumped. He couldn't understand how Dimentio kept winning! Then it clicked, "You're teleporting behind me and back when I look down, aren't you? You're a fast little bugger!" Dimentio looked startled. Mr. L was brighter than he thought.
"Maybe…" Dimmy said, trying to think of a good metaphor. But before he had to endure anymore of his accusations, they heard a great rumble under Castle Bleck. The Count teleported in the room.
"What is the meaning of this?"
"HE CHEATS!" L said pointing at Dimentio.
"Not you, dumdum, the noise!" Bleck corrected. L sweatdropped. Bowser broke down the gates and stormed into the room.
"WHERE'S MY-" Bowser started, but Kemek interrupted to prevent an unnecessary war.
"Lord Bowser lost his drumsticks, and he's really angry."
"Check the band room," L said, willing to get back to the game (more observant this time).
"GRAWRLGARG, NOT A DRUMSET, CHICKEN WINGS!" Bowser stormed. He was losing it. L sweatdropped again.
"L prefers mostly meat here," Dimmy said, grinning. L shot him an I'll-kill-you look.
"His fingers! They're Barbequey!" Bowser beamed. Kamek leaned over to lick his fingers- so awkward for them both.
"He-hey, man, whatareyoudoin?" L panicked, "I only eat honey glazed!"
"He's correct. Let's move on." Kamek declared. Dimentio, Bleck, and L watched as they stormed out of the room.
"Ready for another game of Old (I'm watchin you) Maid?" L asked with shifty eyes.
"Heck no, that was interesting, I'm going with them!" Dimmy said, and L and Bleck decided to tag along.
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Fawful was sitting down to his morning Pop Tart and chamomile tea (tell no one) for a Fury-less day. "Dwelling under roots of Kingdoms is not of badness…" He thought. Translated: He liked it here, that is, until he was to attempt a take-over. All of a sudden, the ground quaked above, and with no warning whatsoever, the roof at the entrance of the room collapsed. He saw Bowser's fist hit the ground as he crashed through the roof, his head down and nostrils flaring. Bowser epically looked up, with anger in his eyes.
"What have you of finding this place?" Fawful screamed pathetically like a girl. He could hear toads screaming just like him above ground.
"A certain Toad Toad hinted me in on it," as Bowser pulled a dreary Toad off of his fist and let him fall to the ground.
"(darn Toad, the only plumber that bothers to check the pipes) Uh-what is your wanting?" Fawful was having fury at that moment.
"Did you STEAL MY DRUMSTICKS- is that chamomile?"
"Uhhh, Uh huh…"
"GWAHAHAHAHA, YOU OBVIOUSLY didn't steal my drumsticks! Wuss, guy with fury having quality time with Pop Tarts!"
"I HAVE RAGE!" Fawful pulling out his headgear. Fawful only raged when he was insulted beyond all fury.
"Whatever. Later," and Bowser leaped out of where he came to move onto the next victim. Fawful stood there with his headgear, now a bit stunned. After a while, Dimmy, L, and Bleck peered around the corner. Fawful saw what was going on, and decided to fly alongside them to see what else was happening. As for his hideout, camouflaged duct tape to patch up the giant hole would have to do.
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"MARIO! We're never gonna get fit for the Super Sluggers tournament coming up, quit eating fettuccini!" Luigi commanded.
"BUT ITSA SO GOOOD! I can't believe that I went all this way eating mushrooms and NOT had this!" Mario was dying in delight.
"(can't believe you're Italian and haven't) Good thing I didn't take you to Olive Garden!" Luigi rolled his eyes.
"WHAT'S OLIVE GARDEEEN?" Mario said as if on a sugar rush… noodle rush. All of a sudden, a great rumble shook the humble kitchen of Mario and Luigi. Before they could react, Bowser punched through the pantry wall, and trampled the kitchen table.
"Heheh, I love doing that," Bowser chuckled pleasantly. The Mario Bros looked outraged, not only because of his presence, but because he stomped on Mario's dinner. Mario disliked that.
"MY DINNER!" Mario raged.
"Just no, what the heck… Mario not eating 1-ups? I can tell you didn't take them, but I will ask this once, WHERE ARE MY DRUMSTICKS?" Bowser thundered.
"Did you check the band ro-" Luigi started.
"NOOO," Bowser shouted.
Luigi sweatdropped. "I know, right? Great suggestion, until he screamed at me,"Mr. L said.
Luigi jumped, "Where'd you come from?"
"THAT DOESN'T MATTER NOW. MOVING ON," Bowser stormed off once again with his army of minions, all in search for the fiery drumsticks. The Bros silently concluded to chase Bowser, since he was most likely going to rein more destruction. Mario turned around to find Bleck, Dimmy, and Fawful also in his house- nearly gave him a heart attack…
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"PEACH! There was no stopping them! RUN!" Toadsworth floated directly towards the pink princess. She looked awkwardly around, but felt the terrible tremble, where Bowser crashed through the white walls of Castle Peach.
"Princess, so se meet again," Bowser dramatically and evilly smiled. Even if she didn't have his food, he would steal her too. Peach gave her famous gasp and yell for help.
"By the way, WHERE'S MY FOOD?" Bowser demanded.
"I-I… don't know what you're talking about!" Peach stammered honestly.
"No, none of you vegans eat meat, you're right, well, time to go, let's move on, and you're comin with," Bowser concluded. He was moving towards Peach to grab her and go, but Peach did something unlikely. She actually started to run away. Bowser started to chase her round and round the throne and columns, until Mario, Luigi, and the band of villains arrived. Mario and Luigi were now chasing Bowser who was chasing Peach. Bleck, Dimmy, L, Fawful, and Toadsworth now watched the Tom & Jerry like situation.
Bowser finally caught Peach and slung her over her shoulder. And Bowser turned around to face the Bros, and opened his mouth to let out a brilliant flame. But embarrassingly, he let out a ferocious belch. It was such a giant burp, the Mario Bros stepped back, dazed.
"EW, you have to do that when I'm on your shoulder?" Peach whined.
"Whoah, where did that come from…?" Bowser himself did a sweatdrop.
"Please put me down, just for a minute," Peach asked. Bowser did, because he had to turn to the wall. He burped so intensely, fire mixed with it, scorching the entire height of the wall plus the end of the floor.
"I think I know what happened to your drumsticks… plus probably the rest of your kitchen," Peach decided.
"But I don't snack at night… like I used to…" Bowser said, letting out a yawn right after that.
"Maybe you sleepwalk…?"
"I- I must… this is awkward… nobody sees this," Bowser put a hand to the side of his face. A goomba spoke up.
"I did tell you that the food's been going, going, gone for the last few nights…" Bowser belched again, right at the goomba (practically aimed at him). Right in that split second, Kamek formed a shield around the goomba, saving his life (probably would be smushed but later on by the Bros anyway).
Fawful pleasantly spoke up, "You know, I find chamomile tea to be very calming an-"
"NO, LORD BOWSER TEA DRINKER? I don't THINK SO," Bowser roared.
"Lol! You got told off!" L laughed.
"I will spread you like mustard on bread of revenge…" Fawful muttered.
Peach decided to poke in, "Hush you two, Bowser, at least give it a try, we'll keep it a secret, RIGHT everyone?" Peach looked expectantly looked around, "Or get kicked out of the next Mario game!" That got everyone's attention. Nobody felt like battling at that point… could she even do that to them? They decided not to take a chance, and even Bowser left the castle without Peach.
"Can you do that Peach?" Mario asked nervously.
"Hahahahahaha, no, not at all, but they don't know that!"
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"So I never got my drumsticks back. And I never will unless I barf 'em all up or spend money," Bowser pouted. Kamek patted his shoulder and handed him a mug.
"Hey, let's hunt some monsters in Dimble Wood, and pick up some meat at the nearest merchant stand, heck, maybe raid it!"
"Yeah, I guess…" Bowser sniffed his tea, "Is this supposed to smell like this? It's so… leafy smelling…"
"Yes, but the taste isn't so bad, I added sugar. Let's go, Lord of Tea and Belching," Kamek laughed.
"Don't push it," Bowser warned.
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Hope you liked it XD I actually love chamomile tea. And it was funny, because as I was writing this, I saw a commercial for Mike & Molly and he mentioned "It tastes like I licked the bottom of a lawn mower." So coincidental LOL. Thanks for reading!
And for all you deivantART people, if anyone can draw Bowser drinking tea I'll favorite it XD, definitely!