Title: The Reason
Summary: Daryl Dixon never thought he was father material. But things happen, and Daryl finds himself becoming that person regardless.
Pairing: Carol/Daryl, implied Rick/Michonne (and friendships between the other characters)
Rating: K, at the moment. Suitable for most ages but similar to the show, this does involve zombies, combat and swearing. The first chapter's alright, but I might end up changing it eventually.
A/N: This is my first ever The Walking Dead fanfic, so I am deeply sorry about any mischaracterization that might occur! I am definitely open to criticism, as long as it isn't harassment. :-) Anyway, this is an idea that I had for a while, and I was going to post it on Tumblr to ask someone to write it, but then I figured: why not give it a shot myself? I'm a... half-decent writer and I certainly do need the practice. But if you decide to write your own version of the story, please do link me! I'd love to read it. Title is from that super famous song. You know what I'm talking about.
For the sake of convenience, I will not be following the show's current storyline as of season 5 precisely. I do not know exactly how long this fic will take, so I will just take elements from it that I liked but otherwise it's just my story. This is happening a few months after Carol returned to the group, and they found their current home in the church.
Daryl does a lot of things right.
The day the world went to shit, that's the day the world started to change him. He started to learn how to fight, how to survive, how to become a warrior, a protector. He, however, often found himself struggling with the things that have always been his achilles heel.
"Eh..." Judith was struggling in Carl's arms, her face twisted like she was hungry or sleepy. Daryl couldn't figure it out. He didn't grant himself enough time to even try to anyway.
The archer watched in a slightly uncomfortable silence as Carl awkwardly attempted to reposition himself without upsetting the little girl too much. "Maybe she's hungry." He suggested, a little more under his breath than he intended.
Carl was sitting relatively close to Daryl, so he heard it nonetheless. "There's some food in the other room. I'll get it. Can you hold Judith for a sec?"
Without even giving him the opportunity to respond, Carl handed Judith over to Daryl. Too flabbergasted to even utter a word, he found himself just accepting the child and watching Carl as he ran off to get some food.
Judith started to whine in his hands, and he noticed how uncomfortable she must be in that position. He was still holding her in his two hands, without even bringing her to his chest or something.
"You know, she's a baby, not a football." A familiar voice startled him. He looked up to find Carol standing there, her arms crossed, that familiar cheekish grin plastered on her face.
"I know." Daryl just said, quickly tearing his gaze away from hers to place Judith on his chest.
His mind was racing. There was so much he wanted to talk to her about, and ever since she got back, there just didn't seem to be any time. He watched Judith closely as he felt her take a seat on the ground next to him.
"Place seems alright." He said after a while, just for the sake of breaking the silence. When she didn't respond, he carefully glanced at his right, only to find Carol staring off in the distance. Her smile was long gone, and it was replaced by something. Something... he couldn't quite figure it out. He knew her mind was troubled, but she just wouldn't tell her yet. Not that he was pushing her or anything. All he wanted to do was keep an eye out for her. He already lost her once, and it hurt him more than he'd ever thought it would.
"You alright?"
Carol clutched her knees to her chest and rested her chin on them as she glanced back at him with a distant, light smile. "...I will be."
A few minutes of silence passed when baby Judith started to make "neh" sounds, squirming in Daryl's arms with obvious discomfort on her face. Daryl didn't really know what to do with it and found himself just moving her around without doing much to help ease her discomfort.
"Ah. Come here." Carol was quick to free him of the young child, her maternal instincts quickly taking over the situation. Daryl couldn't help but feel immensely relieved and watched as Carol easily started to rock Judith back and forth, smiling down at the child. It kind of pleased him to see that the woman he knew years ago was still there.
She was different now, of course. She appeared to be colder, more brutal in combat, she had transformed into a true survivor. And part of him was glad. Maybe now he could allow himself to try allow her a little more to look after herself. Not that she wasn't always strong.
No, he always cherished a deep respect for her. And after everything that happened with Sophia, their bond has been one of the strongest ones he had. They never really talked much about it, but it was there. And they both knew it.
Quick footsteps brought his thoughts back to the here and now, and Carl finally came emerging from the other room. "Sorry it took me so long. Hey, Carol." Carl offered the woman a small smile, and Daryl couldn't help but notice that the boy was obviously glad that she took over taking care of Judith. "Here." He handed her a can of what looked like mashed apples and plopped down on the floor next door her, obviously wanting to play with his little sister a bit as Carol started feeding her. Daryl again found himself feeling like the outsider looking in, watching as Carl attempted to imitate his sister's pleased baby noises and Carol simply made sure that everything went in the way it was supposed to.
For a moment, he felt at ease.
The night passed with no real difficulties. Michonne had offered up to be on the lookout that night, and besides a few walkers she needed a minute extra for, she was perfectly capable of making sure that no walkers entered their (temporary) sanctuary.
"Mornin' Daryl." The same words were repeated a few more times by different voices, and Daryl just nodded as he passed each group member, a small can of soup in his hands. He didn't do it intentionally, but he quickly found himself searching the room for Carol.
After she put Judith to bed, she immediately retreated to her room which she technically shared with Michonne, but since Michonne was on guard duty she had all the privacy she wanted. He just figured she wouldn't appreciate it if he followed her into her room, but the other areas of the church were a general place. He wanted to talk to her, he needed to.
"I heard you spent some quality time with Judith yesterday." Michonne's voice came from behind him, and he turned around to find her smirking at the mere thought of it. "When I first met you, I never would've pegged you as the fatherly type."
"Oh, well, I don't know if it's that-"
"Big brother, then." Michonne corrected herself, noticing his displeasure.
"Well, I did have a brother. Though, I ain't never been a big brother before."
"Well, I suppose you are one now, whether you like it or not." Michonne offered him a teasing wink. It occured to him that he considered her family. He remembers the day he first met her. He never would've thought that she'd end up in the group, teasing him like she's been here since day 1. "You never thought about that?"
"'bout what?" Daryl followed as Michonne started strolling towards the church pews.
"You know," she let out an exaggerated grunt as she settled on the hard wood. "Becoming a a dad. Making a little family. I know you've got this whole hardened archer zombie slaying survivor thing going on, but I'm sure that's not who you were before."
"Before I answer that, I'm gonna ask you one. What about you?" Daryl hoped that'd keep her talking long enough for him to offer her a decent answer. Honestly, he didn't remember what he wanted his life to look like before the apocalypse.
"I had a little boy." Michonne quickly replied, a sadness in her eyes but a smile on her lips. "Obviously, he didn't make it. But I try not to think about that too much."
"Right. You've got Carl now." Daryl finally took a seat next to her.
Michonne shrugged it off, though Daryl found it easy to notice that her eyes lit up ever so slighty at the mention of the Carl. "I don't have him, but... he's a nice kid. I like lookin' after him. And he looks after me. That's what family does. Anyway. You almost succesfully avoided my question." Michonne teasingly poked his arm and he grinned for the first time that day.
"Why are you so interested in my past? The past's the past. Ain't nothing good thinking 'bout that now. All we gotta do is survive."
"That's it? Just, survive to die another day? There's gotta be more to that."
"What do you want me to say? 'I want to get a girlfriend?' 'I want to get married?' I was never really that guy anyway." He spoke in a slightly louder voice, finding it hard to hide the fact that he was becoming irritated about Michonne's sudden curiosity.
Rick's footsteps were a blessing. His eyes were all business, and he knew exactly that Rick planned all of their day activities already. Daryl rose to his feet, almost as if he was in the army. "Listen, we gotta scour the area for some extra supplies. Gabriel's got food. But it's gonna run out." Rick's voice was firm, and Daryl knew that his mind was made up.
Michonne also stood up. "He's right. Better to be safe than sorry."
"Gabriel drew us a map of nearby buildings in the area. Now, nobody's going in alone, but since we're all skilled fighters here, I'm sure we can all manage with a team of 2 or 3." Rick's face turned to Michonne. "I'm takin' Carl."
Michonne nodded. "Alright, I'll go with you guys too."
Rick nodded back at her, getting the answer he expected. Though he did look back at Daryl with a bit of an apologetic look. Daryl was often his right hand man, after all.
"It's cool. I'll go with Carol." Daryl couldn't help but feel kind of relieved that he could take this opportunity to be alone with her for a while. That is, of course, if Rick didn't put someone else on their team.
"Alright." Rick stepped back to where the rest of the group was, loudly announcing that Glenn, Maggie and Tara would be the final group going outside that day. The rest was told to stay here and protect the church.
About fourty five minutes later, Rick, Michonne and Carl had already taken off and Glenn, Maggie and Tara were just double checking their weapons, ready to leave as well. Daryl and Carol were also in the armory (or room with ammo and weapons, Father Gabriel really didn't like the fact that there technically was an armory in his church) checking their weapons. Daryl noticed that Carol only took her knife and a small handgun. She didn't even bother to look at the automatic weapons that were laid out in front of her.
She noticed his gaze. "We're going out for supplies. We're not going out on a manhunt."
"Ya never know what's out there."
"Exactly. And shooting is technically the last thing we want to do." She slid her handgun into the holster on her hip and made her way to the exit, Daryl following suit.
Her pace was fast, and Daryl wanted to say something, or ask something, anything. But he just couldn't find the words. So all he could do was just follow her in silence.
The silence was what he used for most of their car drive. It wasn't too far - a 15 minute car drive - but since they found a working car, they figured it'd be safer to use it.
Carol parked the car a few minutes away from the house, just to be safe. Gabriel insisted that everyone who ever lived in this area had already passed away, but there's something about his constant nervous behavior that didn't reassure her at all.
"Keep an eye out." Daryl told her without really needing to, and Carol just gave him an 'I know' look, as the two of them slowly made their way to the building.
It was an abandonded house that would've been the prefect little place to live pre-zombie apocalypse. Daryl noticed that the house was probably painted over a few times, and a swing in the back yard could make one assume that this was once inhabitated by a family.
Carol pulled her gun from its holster and took the safety off as Daryl approached the front door, taking his time to take his bow and position it in front of him. He gave her a small nod after a while, and she quickly swung the door open, instantly raising her gun, her eyes peering through the rooms like a predator hunting for prey. Daryl did the same.
The two of them checked all the rooms. They seemed to be clear, except for one where Carol was startled to find a body lying on the floor. Whoever this person was, they could've only died a horrible death, judging by the position it was lying in. She didn't want to take any risks, so she forced back a sigh and used her knife to stab the head.
"Wanna check upstairs?"
Carol simply nodded, and followed Daryl as he snuck up the stairs, his eyes swiftly moving from left to right. There's not a lot that would miss his attention during moments like these. They thought they were in the clear, but Daryl instantly spun around to give Carol a look when there was an obvious noise coming from the bedroom. An all too familiar noise.
He made his way to the door in question, but Carol's soft hand on his arm momentarily stopped him. He stopped and watched her patiently as she silently switched her gun for her knife.
She nodded ever so slightly.
Daryl's eyes turned back to the door, where the sounds were becoming more and more clear. His hand grazed the door handle, but he couldn't resist giving Carol another look. She didn't look at him. Instead, she seemed entirely focused, her grip on her knife firmer than before. That's all he needed to know.
He swung the door open and was immediately greeted by two walkers, who were all too eager to rush in his direction. Two swift bow shots were the only thing necessary to take them down. He, however, did not expect more walkers to show up from his right. They were 'hiding' in the corner and their loud moaning increased in volume as they started to come in his direction. It all happened in a flash though, the second he needed to pull himself together was the only second Carol needed to use her knife to give the first walker a devastating blow to the face. The other walker, who was first going for Daryl, was now much more interested in Carol who was closer and easier to reach. Carol, however, was still busy retrieving her knife from the other walker's skull so Daryl had to act fast. Deciding it was too dangerous to shoot in Carol's direction, he simply rushed over to her and used his bow to knock the walker down.
Carol had her knife again, and in a second, Daryl looked at her again, wondering what she wanted. She pursed her lips together in that ridiculously cute face he hated - and he hated it because he liked it a little too much - and she shrugged. "You took her down, you get to do the honors."
Daryl placed his foot firmly on the walker's head - careful not to step on its mouth - to make it stop from moving around and shot one bow through the head. He reached down to get his bow back, hearing Carol say: "Y'know, you make me nervous when you do that."
He briefly glanced at her with an unreadable look. "Sorry."
The two quickly fell silent when they heard an obvious thud in the room, followed by complete silence. They shared a look for a second, then both went their seperate ways to look around. Daryl started to look behind the furniture. Carol bent down to take a look under the bed. Behind the curtains. Behind the door that Daryl had swung open before. Nothing.
Daryl tapped on Carol's shoulder, indicating that he was about to open the closet door. It was the only place it could have come from now. She positioned himself next to her, her knife raised.
In one swift move, he took the door handle, pulled it open and aimed his crossbow at the inside of the closet. To his right, Carol raised her hand up high, ready to strike down.
They both needed the same amount of time - a fraction of a second - to realize who they were looking at.
Two big, blue eyes full of fear stared back at them. It was a little girl, not even older than 6. She seemed okay for the same she was in. She was bruised and battered, but awake enough to realize she could've just been killed. She used her arms to clutch her knees to her chest, her body shaking relentlessly.
Carol found her arm fall back to her side, and Daryl quickly did the same, though nobody in the room was ready yet to say something.
"Come on out." Carol eventually said, more in a sigh than in a normal tone of voice. The girl slowly stepped out of the closet, one leg at a time. Carol lowered herself to look the girl into her eyes. "Are you here alone?"
The little girl nodded slowly, obviously still extremely scared.
Carol didn't quite buy that, so she turned to look at Daryl. She wanted to know what he was thinking about all of this. His look didn't offer her much explanation. He was actually equally surprised. "Well," Carol simply stated, raising back up. "This certainly is going to complicate things."
A/N: Not a lot of intense Caryl action, I do apologize. To be honest, I am not quite sure about where I'm taking this story. All I know is that I wrote this story with a Daryl/Carol family theme in mind and because I think Carol is definitely not having a baby anymore in the old fashioned way, I wanted to write a story that introduces a child to her. She obviously decides to take care of the child, and Daryl sort of inadvertantely becomes the father figure. Also not sure if I want to go full on romance novel on this story. Firstly, I need to set the foundations for the family theme, eh? Anyhow, reviews are very welcome. Like I said, this is my first attempt at a TWD fic and I hardly every write fanfiction, so I'm sure there's plenty for me to learn!