I Need You Now~
K.L.

Music: Don't Stop Now and The Great Divide by Emmy Rossum

"It had been years; two weeks shy of six to be exact…

Follow you close, four steps behind

Since a young age we were inseparable, wherever you went I went and where I went you went. Day and night – that's what my parents called us. I never understood at the time, after all how could you be day and I night if they were merely abstracts – nothing tangible? Now though I understand what it was they had alluded to. You were, for lack of better words, my Sun. You drove my existence.

Part of me knew all this time

But nothing is infinite. The Sun is not forever.

Pushed it down deep, kept it so small

To help me keep these fragile rules

Just as day gives way to night, you relented, stepping back and out of my life. There is no other to blame but myself. My words were careless, my actions sloppy. In all my duties that life has allotted me, I have only failed at one.

From crashing down around my feet

I failed to be there for you when you needed me most.

Don't make a sound, just let you be

Lost in her face, can't turn away

As I look back at it I was juvenile; not willing to accept life for what it was. Clinging to this ideal I had made. To the morals that encased society. I became everything I thought would make you proud – would make my parents proud. I became strong, dedicated, caught up in the hunt to right the world's wrongs… Perhaps I was too focused, for soon my motives became distorted – I lost sight.

This final blow helps me let go

Don't stop now, I need this to hurt

I pushed back those I loved most – you most. We were friends. We were women. Society dictated it was wrong; the feeling that arose in the pit of my stomach every time you walked into the room, the manner in which your smile made my heart soar, how your tears and discomforts made me wish I could to pull you close, embrace you… tell you everything would be alright.

Bounded into my mind

No more second guessing anymore

This is how it ends

How I envied my rival. She was able to accomplish everything I was unable to. Though no matter how many times she may have bested me, you were always by my side, cheering me on. You paid no heed to the norm; you didn't follow the flocks. Our friendship was true and I fear I betrayed that pureness.

So don't stop now, get my head on straight

It started with my lack of attentiveness to your needs. Your body language had changed and I was too blind to take heed, consumed in my own little world. In my mind I figured regardless of what I did you would follow, after all had time not proven that? I was in my senior year and nothing had changed, who was I to think it would? I couldn't foresee the future; I couldn't read your mind. To me life was perfect.

But it wasn't, and I was naïve to think as such. Around me I was destroying the supports that had held me elevated all this time.

Ultimately it was a mere phrase and a gasp of disapproval that widened the already growing chasm between us to irreparable proportions. You didn't show it at the time, or perhaps I was too ignorant… Heh, I always though Shizuru had done the unthinkable, that forgiveness would never come.

And if seeing this is what it takes

I was wrong.

Please, don't stop it now

Forgiveness came for her.

This will be the last time

Forgiveness evaded me.

This darkened street you go to hide illuminates

You're not mine, these days run cold

I always wonder 'what if'. What if I hadn't focus on achievement? What if I hadn't let societies views seep into my own? What if I had stayed the young child who wasn't afraid of what everyone else thought? What if…

My body numb, I am not whole, what have you done?

But what if doesn't cut it; what if won't change what is.

It all makes sense to disconnect

Too many words were left unsaid

It was the day after graduation. So busy I had been, that I neglected what you had to say, continually pushing it away. In your voice I couldn't hear the urgency nor the pain. I put myself first and you second. Why I did so, I'll never know.

A few days later when I finally found the time… No not found. The time was always there… When I gathered the courage I picked up my cell and entered the numbers. I knew it by heart.

But still I stare frozen here

Until the curtains close

I remember it so vividly, the emotions that welled within my chest. Fear, anxiety, sorrow… It had gone straight to voicemail. You never let it go to voicemail… at least not for me.

You had left. Got up, moved your things, and went; all without a single word. When I ran, I ran to an empty house. When I called, I called to thin air.

Don't stop now, I need this to hurt

I had lost you… All I had left was a letter I found laying on the front porch. It was your penmanship, you had always had exceptional cursive writing. The way you crossed your t's and dotted your i's… it was uniquely yours.

Yes, all you had left for me was one letter and fourteen years of memories.

Bounded into my mind

No more second guessing anymore

This is how it ends

For the first time in over a decade I wept. Seated on your front step, my back to the door, tears poured from my eyes. From time to time someone would walk past, passing me a worried glance before moving on with their day, but I paid them no heed. None of them could fill the gaping hole I felt in my chest.

Reach across The Great Divide

I was at a loss; wandering without a purpose. You were the glue that held me together, you were my Day…

Are you listening?

Don't look away

Hear me say

To my surprise it was my greatest rival that brought me back from the depression I had sunk into. She helped me recover… helped me realise why you did the things you did. I was never good at understanding people, you were the one exception, but it seems even you I did not know that well. It made me realise just how isolated I had made myself, how I had cut you out… I always thought I had made you the priority in my life, but I was mistaken. I see this now. I didn't cherish you for all the little things. Dare I say I didn't love you for all the right things?

…

I need you now

These days spent without you, I've grown. I've learned what it means to struggle, what it means to hurt. You taught me many lessons, even when you weren't in my life you were still teaching me from afar… I could feel it deep within my heart…

You were always there with me, even if not physically. You taught me what it means to fall in love and though I know my chances are next to none... I ask now that you give me an opportunity to share with you this love. To have the chance to return to you even the smallest fraction of love which you once gave me. But I understand if you aren't comfortable with that, I'd be honoured if you granted me the wish to just be able to see you once again, be it a month for now, even a year…"

The tides had turned. In six years time so much had changed… She had missed so much. The days spent without her dearest friend by her side had been the loneliest she had ever experienced. And now here they were, by the Fates, in the same city, at the same time, in the same small coffee shop…

"Haruka…" Whispered the young woman, the tears that she had long ago kept at bay flowed freely down her pale cheeks.

"Oh God, Yukino please don't cry, you know you don't have to. I mean I was just… I shouldn't… I'm so sorry…" Out of her seat she had arisen, arms extended but hesitant.

Without a word Yukino extended her own arms, entwining her fingers about her childhood friend's, drawing both hands to rest upon her cheek, "Don't be sorry Haruka, you never did anything wrong."

"If I had just…"

A warm smile captured her lips, silencing the blonde in an instant, "Like you said Haruka 'what if' won't what is; we only have the here and now." Running her thumb over the older woman's knuckles, Yukino couldn't help but chuckle ever so quietly to herself, "Haruka, I ran away once but here you are… against all the odds you found me. If you'd give me the chance, I'd like to take you up on your offer."

For a moment the blonde stayed silent, contemplating her companion's words, "So… I can see you again?" Her voice was so full of hope, much like that of a child before Christmas.

"No," The quick negative response caused the blonde to flinch, pain taking hold of her features. However, Yukino was quick to remedy the situation. Rising from her own seat, she bent forward over the table and gently pressed her lips against the other woman's.

Lavender eyes went wide, her body remained motionless for a moment, but only a moment as she hastily returned the kiss, through it attempting to demonstrate all the love she had ever felt for her childhood friend. Free of constraint. Free from society. Free of her own inner demons… It was just Haruka, the little girl Yukino met over two decades ago.

As the two parted, both short of breath, silence set in but only for an instance as the eldest of the two spoke, "So… what now?"

Forest green eyes widen a fraction before Yukino burst into laughter.

"Y-y-yukino!"

Entangling her hands in the blonde locks, the woman in question couldn't help but smile, "Now Haruka-chan we live life like it was meant to be… together."

Don't look away

Hear me say

…

I need you now

Well I hope you enjoyed it. I'm sorry it was delayed.

For those of you waiting on Reunion I ask that you be patient. Things are a little busy in my life at the moment and my focus really needs to be on my school work. So please bear with me.

Sincerely, K

PS: In case you missed it the whole beginning is Haruka's confession