The Golf Trip
It was their favorite time of the year, Shark Week. Mesmerized and fascinated, they couldn't tear their eyes off of it. There was nothing better for Brennan Hough and Dale Doback than sitting in their parent's living room and watching Shark Week. They would often "ohhh" or "awww". They could watch it for hours and hours without getting bored. The trouble was that this episode was now over.
"What are we going to do now?" Dale inquired sitting on the couch now very unentertained.
Brennan sat and pondered this question until he finally answered, "Let's go do some karate in the garage."
"But we just did that yesterday," Dale explained. "We should go golfing. There is this course that we can play on that's only a thirty minute drive away."
"Who is going to drive us there? Our parents are out of town on a vacation," said Brennan.
Dale's plan was now basically destroyed. His dream was crushed. He had wanted to go golfing for a long time. Disturbed and furious, he sat there and tried to think of a solution. Suddenly, he thought of his new, foolproof plan to go golfing.
"We can take the car!" exclaimed Dale. Brennan just sat there and stared at him. He had never heard an idea as stupid as that. Eventually, poor judgment overcame him. It was a Friday night and he had nothing better to do, so he agreed to go.
They were now driving down the highway, dressed in their golf clothes. You could frequently hear the rattle of their dad's clubs in the back seat when Dale would accidentally drift out of his lane into the shoulder. This was the first time he had ever driven a car, but he knew something was horribly wrong when the car started to slow down and eventually come to a complete stop on the side of the road. He tried uselessly to start it.
"Great, it's out of gas," said the furious Brennan after seeing that the gas needle was far below empty. "How could you not see that it was low on gas? You are the most stupid person that I know. If I had a pillowcase, I would fill it with bars of soap and beat the crap out of you!"
"Don't worry; I have my phone with me. I'll just call for help," resolved Dale as he reached for his phone in his pocket. While he brought it up to his ear to talk on it, the phone slipped out of his hand and landed into the open glass of water that was in the cup holder.
Disgusted by his brother's ability to mess things up, Brennan got out of the car. He looked around and took in his surroundings. This highway was in the middle of nowhere. There was absolutely no traffic on this road to wave down for help. They could be stuck out here all night. Not in million years would he think that this trip would go this horribly. To satisfy his frustration, he bombarded his brother.
Brennan ripped the passenger door open and pulled Dale out of the car. After throwing him to the ground, he tried to pound his face in. Instead of the fight looking like a bloody battle, it could easily be confused with two little girls bickering on the playground.
"What are you doing?" yelled Dale as he was being attacked.
"You ruined my whole day. We should have stayed at home. If it wasn't for your stupid idea, I could be at home right now and not stranded out in the middle of nowhere," shouted Brennan while he was still trying to overpower Dale.
Dale was able to get out of Brennan's grasp long enough to open the trunk of the car and retrieve his dad's driver from the golf bag.
"This has gone far enough. Just settle down and we can find some way to get help," Dale said trying to reason with Brennan. Brennan agreed to calm down but when Dale let up his guard, he lunged into the back of the car to get the three wood.
"You're going to pay for what you have done!" yelled Brennan as he gripped the club.
"Stop it Brennan! Look, help has just arrived," said Dale as he spotted a police car that was not pulling over behind their car.
"No way! You aren't getting out of this that easy," Brennan screamed as he ignored the police officer in his car with the flashing lights on.
"I don't want to hurt you, but you are giving me no choice," said Dale. The two new enemies stared into each other's eyes with a new found repugnance. It was just the three of them in the middle of nowhere on a breezy, Friday night. They could have easily put down their weapons, called it even, and hitched a ride with the cop to the nearest gas station. But that was not going to happen. This was war.
They circled each other like boxers in the ring. Their knuckles were turning white from squeezing the clubs. Each of them was waiting for the other to swing first. By this time, the cop had gotten out of his car and was yelling at the men.
It was about to go down. They saw the look in each other's eyes and at the same exact moment they swung. The head of the clubs impacted the face of both of the brothers simultaneously. Painfully and comically, the heads of the clubs smashed their heads. They were both out like a light.
The next day they woke up with atrocious headaches. They quickly realized that they were in jail. It was a small cell with only the two brothers in it. The only furniture was a small, bunk bed couch with a toilet in the corner.
"Your face is messed up," said Brennan with a smile as he noticed the colossal bruise on Dale's forehead.
"Your bruise is an improvement on your face," barked back Dale.
They just sat there and looked at one another for a few moments. Next thing they knew, they were holding each other and crying for their parents. They looked like little, scared girls who were in the wrong place.
They spent the whole day just sitting in jail, doing nothing. When they finally got their one phone call, they called their parents. Furious and disappointed, their parents yelled at them. In the end, they told them that they would be by the next day to bail them out.
Terrified by the unsuitable cell, they did not sleep at all that night. The next day, their parents came and bailed them out. They had never been happier in their life. From now on, they would be very content with staying at home and doing nothing. This trip had taught them a good lesson. Never go golfing.