Just a while ago
By: WhiteStone
Pairing: Lennon/Cindy (Lenindy)
One-shot, K+
Summary: Cindy thinks over her time with the others the day before the snuffing out of the Temple; Lennon speaks to her by the fire.
Cindy had just finished a conversation with Emma. She had tried her best to comfort Emma's mixed emotions, while also trying to present herself as a guardian figure to her.
"I'm so sad at times." Emma confessed openly. She leaned against the building wall, the daytime coming quickly.
"Why?" Cindy asked, though she knew why.
"I just feel out of place at times here. I wonder what life would of been like if we had never crashed."
Cindy blurted out in a almost as melancholy whisper, "That doesn't matter anymore."
Emma's tears came. "Then there's this guy and he keeps looking at me. Do you think he likes me?"
Cindy wanted to blurt out, "What! Tell him to stay away!"
Instead she tried to keep her heart rate down. "What does he say to you?"
She was scared. Were grown men trying to prey on her young Emma?
"Well, he tells me that he likes having my happy face around." Emma smiled through her tears, just as a bird called in the distance.
Cindy's eyes traveled to the others around her and remembered she should be starting a pot of boiling water for clothes washing.
"We're safe here Emma. I know. Jacob protects us." Cindy grinned a little as the young woman and asked Emma to go find her brother to gather wood.
Lennon wandered over. He looked perturbed.
"Hey Lennon." She called over to him. Was he listening?
"Are you okay?" She almost uttered, but then bit back her tongue.
She wondered at times if Lennon even told half what was on his mind.
"Well, hi, Cindy." He said looking up to her. He fidgeted with his vest.
She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Lennon, why are you acting so weird?"
"I..." He started then his voice trailed off.
"Dogen seems to think we're unsafe." He looked to her urgently.
"Please don't tell anyone I said that, Cindy!" He cautioned.
"Look, I've know you for a long time, right, Cindy?" He turned his face away and he let out a sigh.
Her face contorted to a look of concern.
She walked to the direction he had turned himself in, "Yeah, what's wrong?"
She felt something wasn't right. Something wasn't.
"I have reason to believe we are at open war with Jacob's enemy."
"He can't come in," She said in her folly, "This place is safe."
Zach and Emma came up. They peered at Lennon with curiosity. He usually didn't come to fraternize with them.
They piled the wood on the pit and stared at Cindy and back to him.
Lennon glanced towards the thick trees yonder. He wondered what it must feel like to be free.
He took Cindy's hand shyly and then patted it like a father to a child, "Don't worry." He whispered.
He turned away quickly. She watched his boots walk away. She has caught sight of what he didn't want her to see- tears.
She gulped at his own emotion and wanted to break down and weep.
"Cindy," Zach asked outrightly, "Does Lennon like you?"
She shivered. "No." She declared boldly as if unaffected.
She started the water and headed back to the sleeping quarters to gather the dirty apparel.
Her heart swelled and then she pushed herself a step back.
It seemed just a while ago she had been on the beach as a survivor of a plane crash. She knew Lennon had truth to what he warned. She knew somehow no matter what he said she would continue to be a survivor.
Celebration of pain
I can't be without you in this world of mine
It's a silent little place I've created
and when I die inside
I run away to this world
Nothing is wrong
On the outside there is war, strife, and the refusal of love
I wanted to stand by you and be a heroine
Nothing stays the same and life I knew is cut out
I perish slowly in my world
I can't shut out the indignity and the pain
I cry out for you now but no one hears- it's not meant for their ears
(A.E.B March 11,2010)