As Fuwa Sho struggled against his restraints, he realized that his attempts were futile. The stray jacket had been put on as soon as he got violent with the nurses. He could still feel the throb of his fists from fighting against the burly male nurses who had been called when he'd lost it. Reporters who had come to get dirt on Kyoko after her recent tragedy had swooped down on the crazed rock star as he fought to run from the hospital and the horrible reality they were facing.
This all my fault.
He could still hear the garbled mess they'd made as they yelled and asked question upon question. They didn't care that he was grieving over the loss of Kyoko. They didn't care that he probably wasn't stable. All they saw was Fuwa Sho finally losing his cool as he had a breakdown at the hospital.
This all my fault.
He could still the pained face of Tsuruga Ren as he watched Kyoko being sped through the emergency doors of the hospital. She couldn't even breathe on her own. Tubes were being shoved down her throat and monitors that were supposed to measure her vitals were flat lining.
He wondered if Tsuruga had even understood the message he'd tried to give him. He'd been yelling, screaming over the noise of the paparazzi and nurses who been trying to get him his own room.
This is all my fault.
He probably hadn't. Even if he did, would he believe Shoutaro? He probably thought he was going insane just like everyone else.
Sho was the only person who could stop this all then. He was the only one who could stop all this from ever happening and he was on lockdown. Drugs to calm him. Restraints to hold him. He was also out of earshot from media hounds and any crazed fans.
There was nobody to help him. Nobody to listen.
Nobody would believe what he had to say. Any chance that Kyoko might have had would die with him as he rotted in whatever mental ward he was currently in.
This all my fault.
He wished he could take everything back. Wished that he could rewrite the future as he had before. Or better yet, stop himself from doing in it the first place. If he could just get out of these damn restraints he could…could…still be trapped in the fucking mental ward.
He was screwed.
Kyoko was screwed.
Tsuruga was screwed.
Whatever life they had together was now gone. And the life that everyone was living now was wrong.
This is all my fault!
As Sho fought and struggled trying to free himself, he finally realized how stupid this was. He could feel his wrists being rubbed raw form his frantic movement and yet they never gave. He could feel the tears running down his face as he realized how fucking hopeless this was.
Kyoko was dead.
She's dead.
He could feel himself losing touch with reality now. The tears ran even harder down his face as he began to kick and roll about.
He could hear a frantic high pitched beeping. His vitals maybe?
He didn't care as fought and cursed and foamed. He barely noticed it as the nurses came back. Grabbing hold of him they tried to force him to calm down.
Like a frightened and pained animal he only fought harder and soon he could feel it. The pinch of a needle being shoved in his neck.
The adrenaline that had kept him fighting for so long dissipated as whatever drug they'd used to sedate him began to take effect.
His limbs grew heavier and the fight left him as his body grew heavier than stone. He was losing touch with reality. Everything began to slow down, so drastically that it was like he was in slow motion.
He couldn't understand what they were saying. Couldn't understand what he had been screaming.
He could barely remember anything anymore as the world began to fade away.
This…is all...my faul—
Sho had failed.