Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: ...I completely blame the damn heat for me being absolutely lazy. So everyone, I humbly apologize for taking so long. Anyway, here's a little something to cool you off. Heh, that frosty pun is priceless. All right I'll stop, and because I like you there's an entire fanfiction part of this since I decided to retcon it. It's because something with the Ice King and Lady Rainicorn should be interesting, no? Especially since I have not really seen anyone do them. So yeah, have this... very interesting adventure fic as a huge bonus that I threw up. Enjoy!
The grumpy Ice King was at it again as he took Princess Bubblegum into his cold, isolated lair of evil. Of course, Finn and Jake were HOT on his tail.
"Curses! They're right behind me!" The Ice King snarled as he tried going faster. "Hoo... age has not been kind to me..."
"Let her go, you ugly bag of ice!" Finn shouted as he flailed his long, skinny arms about.
The Ice King laughed as he ignored Finn's shout. "I'm the Ice King! I do what I want!"
"Then why are you still trying to snatch princesses?" Jake asked as he ran alongside Finn (because he was tired of carrying Finn's fat ass on his back all the time).
"Well... that's a personal question." The Ice King simply responded as he went around the snake curve leading uphill to his lair.
"No, Jake's got a good point. Shouldn't you be finding a queen?" Finn added as he rubbed his head.
The Ice King briefly stopped, looking up at Princess Bubblegum as he pondered. "Uhh..." He coughed as he rubbed the back of his head. "I have problems with women around my age..."
"So basically, you're absolutely fine with being a pedophile." Jake responded as he sighed.
The Ice King gawked as he shook his head. "No, ugh! That's not what I mean-"
Jake punched the Ice King with his right fist, having extended it out to be able to reach him. This caused the Ice King to head straight into his castle, with Princess Bubblegum still in his possession. "Shut up, wind bag! And while I'm at it, bite my shiny, yellow ass!"
The Ice King moaned as he shook his head, getting up and placing the tied up Princess Bubblegum behind the bars of his newly installed prison cell. Finn and Jake just arrived, but the Ice King was prepared as he got out several sponges.
"Now let's make this a little spongier!" The Ice King stated as he laughed, a certain voice echoing from the laughter as Finn and Jake lunged towards him.
But that was 1 scenario where this happened... and there was plenty of alternate universes where something similar occurred.
The Ice King gasped as he ran as fast as he could, holding an intriguing item under his beard. He was being chased in the grassy meadows east of his icy kingdom by the elegant Lady Rainicorn, who was interested in whatever the Ice King was hiding. The Ice King turned around and zapped several bolts of ice at Lady Rainicorn, but the rainbow colored unicorn curled her body, dodging the icy lightning bolts as she approached the Ice King.
"You'll never get me!" The Ice King laughed triumphantly as he stuck his tongue out at Lady Rainicorn.
Lady Rainicorn neighed loudly as she tackled into the Ice King, causing both of them to tumble. The Ice King was quick to use his beard to fly away, with Lady Rainicorn following, blasting several beams of different colors at the Ice King. One of them hit, turning the Ice King red.
"Hey! That's not nice!" The Ice King shouted back as he shook his right fist at Lady Rainicorn, flying away westward. "Mine your matters, foul beast!"
Lady Rainicorn shouted something in Korean as she swiftly followed the Ice King towards his lone, icy tower.
The Ice King gasped, rubbing his forehead as he looked behind him. Lady Rainicorn was still hot on his tail, the two soaring over the Ice Kingdom as they headed farther west, into unknown territory. The Ice King growled as he still tried zapping Lady Rainicorn, but she replied with her colorful beams. The ice lightning and colorful beams collided, creating a freezing colorful explosion as they soared over the highest mountain peaks in the Land of Ooo, visible from even the farthest reach of space.
"You blasted rainicorn! If only you didn't follow me ever so close!" The Ice King muttered as he took out his bag, eating one of his many trail mix as he snuck it back inside his beard, flying faster.
Lady Rainicorn closed her eyes as a bright aura surrounded her, allowing her to surround the Ice King. However, the Ice King was wiser than he looked, as he flew right out from Lady Rainicorn's grasp. This annoyed Lady Rainicorn as she chased after the Ice King, who was still wondering how he could get rid of her presence.
The Ice King was still flying with his magic beard, hovering over the vast ocean of Ooo as he was still being chased by Lady Rainicorn for no real reason. He turned around, zapping double lightning bolts of ice at Lady Rainicorn, but Lady Rainicorn managed to twist her body, narrowly missing the bolts of ice. Ice King growled as he shook his fist at Lady Rainicorn, bumping into a tall metal pillar that was standing out in the ocean, falling straight into the depths. Lady Rainicorn took notice as she went right into the water after the Ice King.
Ice King mumbled as he had his eyes closed. He opened his eyes, looking around to see that he was in a polluted area of the sea. Gasping in horror, the Ice King flailed his arms as much as he could, doing his best to swim out of the area, when a gigantic, pinkish monster eel popped up right in front of him, bellowing loudly. The Ice King slapped the eel's face away, but this did not bode well as the eel hissed in anger, wrapping the Ice King in a tight firm grip with its tail. The Ice King struggled as he felt his meager bones crushing, when suddenly, Lady Rainicorn appeared, firing a colorful beam at the eel, changing its yellowish eyes color to red. The eel roared as it smashed the Ice King on a nearby rock, chasing Lady Rainicorn, who did her best to avoid the beast. Ice King watched in awe.
The Ice King shook his head as he swam away, zapping the creatures in front of them in ice as he swam deeper into the ocean. He turned back, to see that Lady Rainicorn was occupied with tangling with the monster eel. Sighing of relief, the Ice King turned around and basked in glory as he slowly drifted downward.
"At last... finally I'm free of that pestering rainbow..." He opened his eyes as he heard a piercing cry, the eel being destroyed by a green blast of color. He gasped as he saw Lady Rainicorn neighing victoriously, spotting the Ice King and letting out another neigh as she went straight for him. "Gah! Not again!"
The Ice King fired three bolts of icy lightning bolts towards Lady Rainicorn as he swam under the rocks, Lady Rainicorn heading upward as the lightning bolts missed her. The Ice King blinked, and sighed as he attempted swimming away, when Lady Rainicorn sneaked up on him by surprise, recoiling her body around the Ice King. The Ice King struggled to break free, but both he and Lady Rainicorn were gobbled in one big gulp by a huge angler fish, who swam to the deepest part of the ocean.
The Ice King woke up weakly as he slowly opened his eyes, rubbing them as he shoo his head. He looked around, to see that he was on a huge red tongue. He then turned to his left, gasping in shock, to see a collapsed Lady Rainicorn. Rushing to Lady Rainicorn, he patted her yellow hair as he took a brief moment of silence.
"I now you have been following me all around the Land of Ooo... but this is not the place or time to be dying on me." The Ice King stated as he stood up, muttering a strange, bizarre spell as he clapped his hands several times, summoning a powerful magic. "Now he who has eaten us, prepare to have your butt kicked by thus!"
With this rhyming chant, the Ice King screamed as he zapped beams of white freezing electricity at the gigantic red colored angler fish's teeth, causing the beast to bellow as it opened its mouth. The Ice King screamed as he grabbed Lady Rainicorn and swam as fast as he could out of the beast's mouth, with proceeded to shoot red lasers from its eyes. One of the lasers hit the Ice King's beard, setting it aflame, which was impossible since they were underwater, but it went aflame anyway. The ice King screamed as he fired a bolt of ice lightning at the angler fish while swimming to the top of the ocean with Lady Rainicorn in tow as fast as he could, his old age starting to back up on him as the angler fish came trailing right towards them. The Ice King screamed as he was desperate to make it to the surface in time, but the angler fish was getting closer and closer...
...And then Lady Rainicorn woe up, glancing quickly at the Ice King, and then looking down at the angler fish, gasping as the angler fish bellowed angrily as it revealed its sharp daggers, enough to slice anything in one swoop.
And that was all there was... expecting anything else? Sorry to disappoint you.