"Daya, we're going for an overnight stay, not a 3 week trip. You can't possibly need every single garment in your walk-in closet."

Zendaya looked at her bed. Her duvet was nowhere to be seen, buried under designer outfits of every color. "I'm not taking all of them with me. I just … I have yet to find it."

Dom gave her a quizzical look. "What is it?"

Zendaya sighed and gave her friend an annoyed look. "I don't know, I haven't found it yet."

Dom gave her a small smile, the one that said I know you. Just talk to me.

Zendaya kept on speaking. "I really think this is it. I think I'm ready to tell him"

"You think you're ready?"

Dom didn't seem happy with her friends answer. "This is not something you do unless you actually want it. You can't profess your love for someone, especially a friend, just because you think you're ready."

Zendaya could feel irritation building up. "I'm not going to profess my love to him. But I am going to tell him about these feelings I have. And you know what? Why couldn't I profess my love for him, if that was how I felt? He has given me so much and I haven't done anything in return. I've told myself every excuse there is. It won't work because of our age difference. I'm not mature enough, he's not mature enough. It could end my career. It could end him. What will people say? Maybe enough is enough. Maybe this is it."

Dom let out a sigh. "Maybe. But are you sure you are doing this because you want to or because you're afraid you might lose him?"

Zendaya stared at the clothes on her bed, not saying a word.

"Z, I just want you to do this on your own terms. Anyway, we said we were gonna go at 10 am and it's already quarter past. I'll go start the car, just be quick okay?"

Zendaya nodded her head and watched her friend leave her room. She ran a hand through her frizzy hair and sat down on a chair that was situated by her comforter.

She thought back to the conversation. It wasn't the first time they had had it, and she knew her friend had a point. Val's last season had been a difficult one. Although his attention towards her had never faltered, he had had a young, vivacious partner who made her intentions clear a few weeks into the competition. Val had sworn that nothing was going on between them and she believed him, she truly did but the production and packaging of the partnership had stirred up feelings of jealousy and possessiveness, something that had only happened once before for Zendaya but had also involved him. It wasn't until last December, when Zendaya reprised her role as his dance partner for Sway 2.0, that she realised what this truly meant. These were genuine feelings of affection, maybe not love, but the warmth she experienced when she was near him could not be denied any longer.

She knew Dom was right. Zendaya wasn't exactly sure if her desire to admit her feelings came from a place of pure overwhelming emotions or from a place of entitled selfishness and paranoia. The only thing she knew at this moment was that she had to see him and she had to look amazing.

She scanned her eyes over the mess of fabrics that were scattered over her bed when a black dress from the Material Girl clothing line caught her eye. It had a sheer scoop neckline and long sleeves. She had never worn it before, never had the right occasion but tonight, tonight was it.

She grabbed the dress, folding it neatly and putting it in her overnight bag. As she walked down the stairs she could hear her parents having a conversation in the kitchen.

"18. That's how old she is."

"Which makes her an adult."

"No Claire. She hasn't even finished high school."

"She is the co-producer of her own television show. I think it's safe to presume that she can handle spending the night with her friend, at one of the most expensive and popular hotels in the whole of San Diego. And Val's going to be there too."

She heard her father grunt and decided it was time to reveal herself. She burst into the kitchen, acting like she hadn't heard a thing.

"We're leaving. We're already a bit behind schedule and the traffic on the I-5 is almost always a bitch so …"

"Language!"

"I'm sorry dad. Traffic on the I-5 is almost always in a jam so we need to get going if we don't wanna arrive like 5 minutes before show time."

She hugged both of her parents, reassuring them that everything would be fine.

"I'm coming back home tomorrow. It's 24 hours. No need to go overboard with the papa bear mode. And I'll be with Dom the whole time."

Kaz shook his head and Claire let out a little chuckle "You're not helping. Go. Have fun. Hug Val from your father and I."

"See you both tomorrow."

"Bye. Drive safely!"

Her parents watched as Zendaya ran to the car, stopping before sliding in to wave to them. She had this strange feeling in the pit of her stomach when she looked at them. Like things were about to change.

"Get in the car Daya. It's 24 hours, you're gonna see them again!"

Zendaya could hear the building frustration in her friends voice and quickly sat in the front seat. The drive out of Los Angeles was a relatively quick one for a Monday morning. Dom, as the driver, had control over the radio; the Top 40 was her choice. They drove in silence until a familiar song started playing. She felt as though she was being yanked back to that first week. She could feel it all again.

February 2013

"Stop fussing mom"

Zendaya swatted her mother's hand from her hair. She was nervous enough as it was and her mother was not helping the issue.

"I just want you to look presentable"

"I've been to hair and make-up. If I'm not presentable now I doubt I will ever be"

Her mother smiled at her. "You look gorgeous"

Zendaya tried to reciprocate her mother's loving smile, but her nervousness was at an all time high. She would never show it though, never show any kind of weakness. All of her parents' doubts started flooding her. Maybe she was too young. Maybe it was too risky. She was going to be dancing with someone much older. What if it did turn out inappropriately? What would her fans think?

"Zendaya …"

Her head snapped up and she looked at her parents before settling her gaze on a tall man in his forties who was standing next to them. It was one of the producers; she couldn't remember his name though. She gave him an apologetic look, figuring out that he had been trying to talk to her.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear you Mr. …."

"It's just Conrad, please. I just asked if you were ready for the introduction. The camera crew and your mystery partner are in studio 2B, just down the corridor"

He gestured down a corridor that seemed to grow smaller by the second. Her breath grew shallower, her mouth felt dry and her hands were clammy. This was it. No turning back. She was going through with this. She was not going to let her parents see that maybe they were right. She was going to show everyone that she was not just another Disney starlet. That she was grown up. Mature. That she could handle everything they would throw at her.

As they reached the door the producer explained everything. He would go into the studio and Zendaya was supposed to wait for one minute before following him. She put on her game face, reached for the handle and walked through the door. She was confronted with a camera crew and a man. A handsome man. A familiar man. His name was Val. Val Chmerkovskiy. She would have to learn the proper pronunciation. She remembered him from Roshon's season. He had been partnered with Sherri Shepherd. She had liked watching them. She had liked him. She went straight for him. Introducing herself and initiating a hug that only seemed to transfer her awkwardness onto him.

He complimented her, calling her beautiful. A bold faced lie as she knew there was nothing beautiful about her fidgeting and sweaty self. He probably had an air tight script to follow.

"How old are you?"

"I'm 16"

"16? I take that back"

He paired his retraction with a dorky movement that was supposed to signify the inappropriateness of comment. The action made her smile while the meaning made her seethe a little. She was not a child. They continued the small talk for a few more minutes until Zendaya heard someone yell cut. The crew stopped filming and Conrad went to get her parents. As soon as her father walked into the studio she could see how his chest was puffed out like some kind of a wild animal. Zendaya had seen this many times before. It was a method of intimidation aimed at any male that would be interacting with his youngest daughter for any long period of time.

Zendaya quickly defused a situation that could've gotten out of hand by introducing her parents to Val and then asking the producer if they would rehearse today.

"We want to get a couple of shots of you two rehearsing. For the packages"

He had turned away from her and was directing his words to her parents. Kazembe gave Claire a look, the one that specifically meant I don't like this. Zendaya breathed a sigh of relief when her mother ignored her father and told Conrad that he was indeed the producer and they would follow what he thought was best.

While Conrad and her parents had their conversation, Zendaya could only keep her eyes on Val. Studying him. His face. He seemed a bit let down. He had told her that she was the youngest contestant in the history of the show. The look in his eyes when he said that sentence had been one of defeat. Did he think she wouldn't be able to handle this? Was he disappointed?

Zendaya snapped back to reality when she heard his voice.

"I want you to do rumba walks for me"

"What kind of a walk?"

"A rumba walk. Come here"

He gestured to the spot next to him.

"Stand here, your legs should be absolutely straight. I won't go into the little details just yet but we need hip movement. Just sway a little but don't force it. It's all about your core"

He put his hands on her, one on her lower back and the other one on her stomach. She flinched and he withdrew them so fast one might think he had burned himself. He looked warily at her and half whispered.

"I'm sorry, I should've asked. I'm just used to having partners that don't have a problem with the physical aspect of dancing"

There he went again, making her feel her age. She straightened her back and pulled his arms back to her stomach.

"Show me"

"ZENDAYA"

A yelling Dom tore her from her thoughts.

"I've been trying to get your attention for like 5 minutes now. You just zoned out. What's going on?"

"It's nothing. It was just that song, Feel Again, that's our contemporary song"

"Oh yeah, I knew it sounded familiar. That was a dope ass dance, Daya. I knew right then and there you'd go far"

Zendaya gave her friend a small smile and tucked her feet close to her chest. Her feet were a mile long so it was an uncomfortable position but somehow it soothed her and the memories in her mind. She had so many memories of their time together. Like that time in week 3 when her grandmother had recently been diagnosed with breast cancer and Val did everything in his power to make her feel comfortable and safe. Or the time they were rehearsing for their Argentine Tango in week 5 and he got frustrated with her lack of progression and the fact that she was still holding back, emotionally and physically. All that had disappeared after an honest and open conversation with Anna, the professional dancer who had been dancing the tango with her and Val and his brother Maks. After that week she had been freer around him and he had embraced that in every way possible. As the weeks had gone by he had become her confidante. That one person she could tell everything and he would never try to fix things or give his opinion on situations that he didn't fully understand. He was just …. there. Always. He had always made sure to explain everything to her. Every move that went into a dance, every feeling that accompanied said move. The story, the background, the looks. He broke it all down for her.

Early on she had seen how his demeanor had changed from disappointed to excited to thankful. And then something else happened. She saw a fire in his eyes; contained only to the looks he gave her. She knew what it was but she didn't fully understand. She tried to carry herself with the grace and maturity of a woman and, most of the time, she succeeded. But it was at times like those, when his eyes penetrated her being and his breath ran ragged, that she knew she was only a girl. It made her uncomfortable. The looks, the closeness, his intake of breath every time they were in hold. But she loved him nonetheless. He was her protector. Her friend. Her brother. She never really understood it all until one September evening.

September 2013

"I've never been dragged on stage before!"

Zendaya let out a hearty laugh as she opened the door to her trailer.

"And what did it feel like? Ready for a career change?"

"Nah. It was good for that adrenaline rush but I'm not cut out for the life of a singer"

Zendaya lifted a perfectly shaped brow.

"Aren't you a rapper?"

"I've retired. I was in too much demand. Also the ladies can't handle all of this onstage for long period of time"

He did some kind of a wiggle that made Zendaya choke on the water she was sipping. Val rushed over and tapped her back.

"Are you trying to drown me? That was hilarious!"

All of a sudden she noticed that his hand had never left her back but had moved to her shoulder where he was fidgeting with the strap of her tank top.

She felt a surge of heat and an unfamiliar emotion. She turned her head and looked into his eyes. The fire was there.

"I know uh … I know what I'm about to say isn't right. For a lot of reasons and the main one is … that you're 17. You're just 17. But I can't hide any longer. I've never been able to fully hide. Not since the day I truly saw you"

He had turned his back to her and was running his hands repeatedly through his hair

"I've tried really hard to forget about you. Really hard. But no one is the same as you. You're under my skin, you're in my veins. Every time I breathe in I can smell the scent of your hair, even when I'm not near you. Even when I'm with someone else. I have never fallen for someone before. Not like this. This is love. I know it. You're the only one for me."

Zendaya felt scared. She felt a cloud forming in her head. She could not relate to any of the things Val had just told her. She had never thought about him like he had thought about her. She had never felt his scent lingering around her. And love? He was her family, nothing more.

"I know you're scared Z ..."

"I'm not scared. I just, I don't feel those things for you."

She saw him break. It was the most excruciating sight but yet she knew there was no other way.

"I want you as my friend. Val please, don't stop being my friend" She took a step closer to him, but he backed away. Leaning against the wall he shook his head and then looked at her.

"Never. I would never leave you."

She shook her head and came back to reality. Dom was still driving, listening to Kelis with the volume at its highest. She thought back to that moment. She thought a lot about it. How her life would be if she had reacted differently. Had it been a mistake to reject him? It was always the same conclusion. She had done the right thing. She had taken her time to figure out her feelings and she knew them now. That was a start. She just hoped he hadn't forgotten how he felt about her.

June 2014

"Are you ready for the finale?" Val grabbed her shoulders and massaged them a little. The feeling was nice and she allowed herself to fall back into his arms.

"Of course I am. I'm a part of the dream team. We can do anything" She turned around in his arms a snuggled into him. She felt him tense a little, but he embraced her nonetheless. She knew this wasn't fair. She shouldn't be snuggling into him when just last year he had proclaimed his love for her and she had shot him down. But his arms felt like home and no matter how long the hug lasted, it didn't last long enough.

He let go of her and immediately a stage hand came up to them.

"Yo Val, you have 5 minutes 'til you're on stage"

"Thanks Grant" He slipped his hand into hers and laced their fingers together, stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. "Want to sway with me?"

She smiled, A smile that seemed to be only reserved for him. Now more than ever. It was coy, she knew it. "I want nothing more"

They got on stage and danced like nobody was around them. He twirled her around until suddenly everything stopped. He put his foot around her and Zendaya was hit with a wave of his scent. It was like jasmine petals and rosemary mixed together. It made her a bit lightheaded so she withdrew a bit to the back as Maks came on stage. Soon after Val grabbed her arm and put her in position but she was just going through the motions. All Zendaya could think about was the smell that lingered in the air. All she could think about was him.

Soon enough their part was over and they exited to seperate parts of the stage. A faster version of Dance with Me started playing and the troupe came on. Zendaya felt excitement all over her body. It was a weird feeling, nothing she had ever experienced before. She had a tingling sensation in the pit of her stomach, a feeling she had only read about. She was confused but the clouds that had occupied her mind for the past year were slowly giving way.

They walked on stage, their gazes never leaving each other. As the end of their routine came Zendaya wanted Val to notice her. To really notice her. In a spur of a moment decision she hiked up her dress, just enough so that he'd notice. And notice he did. He quickly looked up at her with blind terror shining from his eyes. This was not the plan.

"We're here! No thanks to you might I add."

"Sorry Dom but I don't read minds. If you wanted me to drive I would've"

"Nah. I'm not putting you in control of my car until you've had your licence for at least 6 months. Can't risk it"

"I'm an amazing driver"

Dom looked at her with a sceptical expression "You backed into your hedge the other day. There's a Lexus shaped hole there"

"There was a squirrel …. "

"That you were trying to back over?"

Zendaya let out a laugh, "Shut up! I was trying to avoid him. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it."

Zendaya got out of the car and went to get the bags out of the trunk. They were in front of the San Diego Marriott, a 5 star hotel Zendaya and her parents frequently stayed at when they were in town. Her father had been adament that she and Dom stay there. For security purposes according to him. After checking in and getting to their room, Dom decided to take a relaxing bath. According to her, she had muscle cramps caused by all the driving.

The room was beautiful. She opened the screen door that led out to the blacony and was greeted with the San Diego bay. A blue sky and a deep green sea. She walked back inside and let herself fall back onto one of the beds. The silk teased her arms and the only thought in Zendaya's mind was of how truly blessed she was. As she sat up she noticed a wall mirror. It started by the floor and stretched all the way to the ceiling. She stood up and saw her reflection. She looked good and she knew it. She had been raised to have faith in herself and her abilities and that extended to her appearance. She was confident. But still, while she was looking at herself, she felt a sensation, starting in the pit of her stomach and moving up towards her chest before settling in her throat. It was a foreign feeling, one of nerves, of doubt, things she had spent her entire life ignoring because she was strong, she was fearless. She was one of a kind.

Then why all of a sudden did she feel like she was standing on the edge of a cliff waiting for the waves to crash and take her away? She knew the answer. She had known it all along.

For almost two years she had looked at his face. She had glanced, gazed, stared, watched and glimpsed at him. She had studied his features; the way he only seemed to have eye crinkles when reacting to her and to children; the way he licked his lips when intensely focusing on something and how his green eyes always betrayed his own walls and showed his true feelings. For two years they had been the best thing in each other's life. Nothing more, nothing less.

But then why was his face the only thing she saw when she closed her eyes? Why did she replay their interactions day in and day out? Why was the only thing that gave her pleasure the thought of him caressing her cheek and stroking her hair? Why could she smell the scent of his skin even when he wasn't around? Even when she was with another.

This was love. She drew a sharp intake of breathe and tears formed in her eyes. She did love him. She had loved him all along.

Dom took this exact moment to come out of the bathroom. "Z, are you okay? What's going on? Why are you crying?"

Zendaya's voice shone bright. "I get it now. I finally get it.

"You get what? Z?"

Zendaya walked to the bathroom, stopping to give her friend a kiss on the cheek.

"I need to get ready" She closed the door and went straight for the shower. She thought about tonight. Her confession, his reaction. She rehearsed the speech she was going to give him. After the shower the two girls started dressing. Zendaya decided to straighten her hair, she liked the sensation of running her fingers through it when it was silky smooth. She put on the little black dress and she was ready.

They took a taxi to the Balboa Theater where the show was being held. Zendaya had called Alfonso in advance and he managed to get them backstage before the show.

"It's so nice to see you Z. And Z's friend."

"Oh this is Dom, my childhood friend from Oakland"

Alfonso took Dom's hand in his "The pleasure is all mine."

Dom smiled cheekily "You're not as silly as you seem on tv."

"I'll take that. I don't know hot but I'll take it. My wife and I are about to get something to eat. Would you two like to join us?"

Dom didn't have to be asked twice. "Hell yeah!"

But Zendaya had other plans. "I think I'll go see Val first. Where are the dressing rooms?"

"Oh they're down and to the right but I'm pretty sure Val is by the stage, checking it out for tonight's performance. He has this ritual. "

He led Zendaya to the stage and there he was. He was wearing a white shirt and dark navy blue pants. His back was turned to her so she tried her hardest not to make a sound while walking towards him. She leaned in and blew on his hair. Val whipped his head and almost collided with her cheek. He had a look of amazement on his face.

"Z? Oh my god!" He took her in his arms, lifting her off the floor while deepening the hug.

"You look amazing."

Zendaya's cheeks started reddening. Only he held this power over her emotions

"What are you doing here? I though you were going to New York? Fashion week?"

"I'm going on Wednesday. Dom and I decided to take a little road trip to see our favorite ballroom dancer"

"Dom is here?"

"Yeah, I think she's having dinner with Alfonso and his wife. But this is not about Dom."

Val gave a sneaky smile. "I thought everything was about Dom."

Zendaya snorted out. "Dom thinks everything is about Dom."

Val laughed and Zendaya smiled at him.

"So … there's no one here? Just you and me?

"I think everyone is having dinner, as you said. Yeah seems to be just you and me. Why?"

Zendaya felt her composure dwindle. She had her speech prepared but right now there was only one thing on her mind. "Tell me how you feel about me"

Val looked taken aback. "Wh … What?"

"Tell me how you feel about me. Please?"

Val ran his hands down his face before clasping them around the back of his neck. She saw uncertainty shine from his eyes.

"You're my friend, my family. You're an amazing young woman."

"Don't talk to me like I'm my dad or some sort of a reporter. Talk to me like you did that one time. At the county fair. Am I still under your skin? Do you have a hard time breathing when I'm around? Does the scent of my hair still tingle your nose, even when I'm not near? Because it does to me. I see your face every time I close my eyes, and I feel your touch burning my skin. This is love. Am I still the only one for you?"

She saw the uncertainty disappear from his eyes and the fire re-ignite. He removed the space between them, taking her face between his hands. His lips were inches away from her own and his hot breath sent shivers all over her body. His eyes were locked on hers, like he was looking for her to push him away.

With her voice barely above a whisper she pleaded with him. "Tell me how you feel."

Val opened his mouth only to close it again. His grip tightened and he finally managed to choke out a few words. "I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go. I just thought … I've been far away for far too long and … But you're here. And you want me?"

He rested his forhead on hers and Zendaya could see tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

"Valentin Chmerkovskiy, I want you by my side. Always and forever"

This time tears ran down Zendaya's face but Val stroked them away with his thumb. He put his lips up to her ear and whispered. "Dance with me"

"This is not my stage. It gives bad vibes to use a stage right before a performance"

"It will be our little secret. A stolen dance."

Zendaya smiled as she put her head on his chest, marveling in the feel of his muscles. Something she hadn't allowed herself to do before but would never stop doing now. For two years she had yearned for something that she couldn't name yet was within reach. But here it was. All hers. All his. To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to love and be loved, that's everything.