(Top Gear theme plays)

Jeremy Clarkson (VO): Tonight on Top Gear, I jump out of a Honda, James cracks open a door, and Richard crashes a Toyota.

Jeremy Clarkson: Hello and welcome everybody. Tonight, we start off with a letter from a region called Kanto. It says "Dear Top Gear, I want a way to get to another region without taking the airplane, boat, and bicycle. I can't seem to use a car because the mountains are as tall as Mt. Everest, and I am too lazy to walk a far distance, can you help me? Sincerely, Red.

James May: We asked the producers what vehicle we could use on our journey, and they didn't give us an answer.

Richard Hammond: But then we noticed on the back of the letter, it said that he wanted to use a car with many seats, and four-wheel drive.

Jeremy Clarkson: We thought he was being nonsense at no cars, but he actually meant that we couldn't use sedans, sports cars, or supercars.

Richard Hammond: But we could use SUV's, because SUV's are comfortable, affordable, and very spacious. But the problem was, we couldn't use SUV's that came from the USA, Germany, England, or any country other than Japan.

James May: In order to find our Japanese vehicles at an affordable price, we had to get them from a used car dealership, in a region called Johto.

(Screen cuts to a bustling city, showing a traffic jam under a monorail, then a bay, and soon a used car dealer ship)

Jeremy Clarkson (VO): This is a place similar to Japan, and we never heard of a place like Johto before, and to makes things even more understanding, it wasn't on a world map.

Richard Hammond: Hey Jeremy.

Jeremy Clarkson: What is it?

Richard Hammond: Where is this place on a world map?

Jeremy Clarkson: What do you mean where? You can probably spot this place in a second.

Richard Hammond: No, Jeremy. I can't even see where this place is. I'm looking at the area where Japan is, but I can't seem to find it.

Jeremy Clarkson: Let me look at the map. Oh my god!

Richard Hammond: What's the matter mate?

Jeremy Clarkson: We don't know where in the world we are!

Richard Hammond: Oh, no wonder why it didn't show up.

Jeremy Clarkson (VO): We soon started to wonder where James was, and why he was taking a long time to get here. But then we remembered that he had to take a different taxi, because he couldn't fit in with us.

Richard Hammond: I wonder if the taxi driver is related to him.

Jeremy Clarkson: What do you mean?

Richard Hammond: I mean that he probably is lost, or slow just like him.

Jeremy Clarkson: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Richard Hammond (VO): Finally James had caught up with us and we were finally going to choose our expedition vehicles.

James May: Hello chaps.

Jeremy Clarkson: James.

James May: Yes?

Jeremy Clarkson: How long did it take your taxi driver to get lost?

James May: What?

Richard Hammond: How long did it take him to get lost? One second or one minute?

James May: Well, it took him about an hour to get going the right way, and another hour to get here.

Richard & Jeremy: Ahahahahahahah!

James May (VO): After the lolly gagging, we soon received a challenge from the producers.

(Jeremy opens the letter)

Richard Hammond: Alright! Do we run around the lot to see who burns the most calories?

Jeremy Clarkson: No. We get a budget of 3,081,499.19 yen, find a SUV to drive over the mountains to Kanto, and whoever gets through the journey without modifying their SUV's for any use, their SUV gets the title of 'Best Affordable SUV For A Tedious Journey".

James May: That title sounded like the longest and tedious one I ever heard.

Richard Hammond: Right! Let's cut to the chase shall we!

Jeremy Clarkson (VO): After the instructions, we set out to go find ourselves a rather rubbish SUV.

(James May is near a Mazda CX-7 talking to the man who owns the dealership, using a translator.)

The Manager: これは3,210,097.22ポンドの費用とそれがへこんドア、行方不明テールライト、およびいくつか漏れがあります。

James May: Uh, how much is this?

James May(VO): Luckily, I found a person who could speak English, and I asked him about a different car that would be suitable for the mountains.

Employee: A very suitable SUV with Four-wheel drive is a Mitsubishi Outlander. Right here we have two. This one right here has no problems whatsoever, but costs 3,201,235 yen, and this one is littered with mechanical problems, such as bad suspension, horrible steering, and to top it all off, no seats, it costs 3,000,000 yen.

James May: Ummm, can you accept 3,087,000 yen?

Employee: *silent*

Richard Hammond(VO): Meanwhile, I was having trouble deciding on a Toyota Highlander and Toyota Sequoia, and Jeremy was, well, he was gone.

Richard Hammond: How much is this one?

Employee: Same as the Highlander.

Richard Hammond: What kind of engines do they have?

Employee: Well the Sequoia has a 5.7L V8, while the Highlander has 3.0L V8. But there is a problem with the Sequoia.

Richard Hammond: what's that?

Employee: Mechanical problems.

Richard Hammond: Oh.

Jeremy Clarkson(VO): After the used car dealer ship, we were told to meet at a 6 floor department store where we would get ourselves food for the journey.

(In the department store)

Jeremy Clarkson: Hey Richard.

Richard Hammond: Oh, hi Jeremy.

Jeremy Clarkson: What are you reading?

Richard Hammond: Just reading the new issue of the Top Gear magazine.

Jeremy Clarkson: Why are you reading that. We are Top Gear you know.

Richard Hammond: Yes yes, I know. It's just something to read during the journey so I-

(Hammond was interrupted by James)

James May: Hello chaps.

Jeremy Clarkson: Hi James.

Richard Hammond: Who is that behind you?

James May: Oh, you noticed my new friend Gold.

Gold: How's it going dudes?

Richard Hammond: Fine, we're doing great. Could you tell us how to get to Kanto?

Gold: Yeah, I can help. I'm actually going over there for the week, so yeah.

Jeremy Clarkson: Thank you, and what is the quickest way to get to Kanto?

Gold: Whoa dude, too many questions. I'll tell you when we get to the Silver Mountain Range. That is, if you surrive with those crappy SUV's.