Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chapter One- Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain

"In the twilight glow I seen her

Blue eyes crying in the rain

When we kissed goodbye and parted

I knew we'd never meet again

Love is like a dying ember

And only memories remain

And through the ages I'll remember

Blue eyes crying in the rain

Someday when we meet up yonder

We'll stroll hand in hand again

In the land that knows no parting

Blue eyes crying in the rain"

-Willie Nelson- "Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain"

Alice Brandon awoke with a start. She was having "The Nightmare" again. She called it "The Nightmare" because it was a terrible recurring dream for Alice. She always woke up in a cold sweat, breathing heavily and tears streaming down her face.

The thing that made it so bad for her, "The Nightmare" wasn't just a nightmare, it wasn't just a dream either; it was a memory. It was the memory of her first and only love being shot before her very eyes.

Yes, Alice Brandon had only ever loved Leah Clearwater. Ten years had passed since Leah's death. Alice was twenty-seven, single, unmarried, and childless.

No matter how many dates Alice had been on, no matter how many times she'd been setup by her co-workers, she could never find anyone who compared to Leah.

She could never find anyone who stared into her eyes as Leah had. No one had kissed her with so much passion as Leah had. No one had held her as Leah had. Most importantly, she had never kissed anyone, held anyone or loved anyone as she had Leah.

Alice always found herself comparing her potential lovers to Leah. No one had come close to Leah in any department. Alice had slept with a few men and a few women, but gave up after having highly unpleasant experiences with both sexes. It wasn't that there was something wrong with them, it was Alice. Her lovers just weren't Leah.

Alice bit her lip and did what she always did after waking up from "The Nightmare." She pushed her hands into her hair and gripped tightly. She bit down so hard on her lip she broke the skin. Blood pooled into her mouth. She whimpered and tried to shake herself from the thoughts of Leah.

She threw back the covers and went into her bathroom. A soft noise caught her attention outside the door. Great, once again, she had awoken Rosalie.

"Alice?" Rosalie called to her.

"In here, Rose." Alice answered.

Rosalie Hale was Alice's best friend since Rose defended her in high school. When Alice had ran away, Rosalie used every source available to her and found her nearly two years after she'd gone.

Rosalie had married Emmett two years ago, they were working on having children at this point. However, Emmett worked for the FBI and was away quite often. Rosalie stayed with Alice whenever he was gone; she hated being alone.

Alice had plenty of room to spare in her three-bedroom home, located in the heart of Luckenbach, Texas. She worked as a physical therapist at the Hill County Memorial Hospital in Fredericksburg. She lived well enough for a single woman in her late twenties.

Rosalie poked her head in the bathroom door. "The nightmare again?" She asked softly. Alice nodded, and Rosalie crossed the short distance to her and pulled her into a suffocating embrace.

After Rosalie managed to find Alice, she had banged on Alice's door at two AM until Alice opened the door. She then proceeded to yell at Alice about taking off without so much as a "Kiss my ass". When Alice explained the situation to her, Rosalie took it all in and accepted it for what it was.

She couldn't put it into words how happy she had been to hear that Alice found someone to spend her life with. She felt an indescribable sadness when Alice told her how she had died. Rosalie put up with everything Alice was going through.

Every night that Alice woke up, screaming and crying for Leah, Rose had been there to calm her down. The first time it had happened, Rosalie was at a loss for words. What could she say to Alice?

'It was just a dream?' No, it wasn't just a dream. It was Alice's brain replaying the most heartbreaking memory it had to offer.

'It'll be okay?' No, Rosalie couldn't say that either. Nothing would be okay for Alice unless Leah was there. She wasn't there and she never would be.

Rosalie was at such a loss for words, she had cried too. She had sobbed for Leah's life ending too early, she cried her eyes tearless for Alice's broken heart. She wished everyday for Alice's soul to mend, but it never did. In the ten years that Leah had been gone, Alice had been lost.

She left that town behind, left her parents behind. She hadn't spoken to her parents since they had left for Porterville. Without Alice knowing at the time, that Friday night had been the best in her life. She had seen her parents for the last time then, and that was the night she met Leah. In a rather unconventional way, but who was anyone to judge them?

Now, Rosalie stood holding Alice tightly, waiting for the tears to stop for the night. She was still at a loss for words to say to Alice. In the eight years that she had been getting up, running to Alice's room and comforting her until she feel asleep, she had never found the right words to say.

Nothing she said to Alice during these times ever seemed to help. Nothing she said comforted Alice. In fact, sometimes it made her weep harder. However, Rosalie was learning that she didn't have to say anything. She just needed to be here for Alice.

Alice only wanted to be loved by Leah, to be held by Leah, to be kissed by Leah, to make love to Leah. Since that was far out of Alice's reach, she settled for the comfort of Rose in the middle of the night. She had mindless dates with uninteresting people. She had loveless sex with men and women she never bothered to learn the name of. All the while, she imagined Leah.

Alice had quite a bit of money saved up from the past ten years of working. She had gotten her GED, went to college and started work immediately. She had paid for college by working at bars, various restaurants and dance halls. All her education was certainly paying off now.

None of it meant a thing to Alice without Leah. She never spent any money on herself. She bought food when she was hungry, she bought clothes when she needed them, but put the rest into a savings account. Alice had no need for it.

Rosalie gently rubbed Alice's arm until her tear ducts stopped spilling salty water onto the girl's face. She put her hands on Alice's shoulders and looked into her eyes. "Ready to sleep now?"

Alice nodded and she went back to her room. Rosalie stayed until Alice was tucked beneath the sheets. Rosalie left the room, whispering, "Good night" as she closed the door. She sighed softly and went back to her room. Tomorrow, she would go to work at the same hospital Alice worked at and do her job as an RN. Then tomorrow night, she would find herself running back to Alice's room to start the whole process over.

Alice heard Rosalie's door close down the hall. She sighed and wiped her sore eyes again. She turned over and looked out the window. It was raining. Alice closed her eyes and remembered the night she met Leah, it was raining.

To Alice, the rain symbolized Leah and everything she was. Free, pure, beautiful, misunderstood. People often hate the rain because it makes the sky gloomy, but not Alice.

No, Alice loved the rain. She didn't think of it as gloomy at all. To her, it was God's way of purifying the world. As much as she hated to think about God after everything her parents drilled into her head. That was the only time Alice ever thought about God, was when it rained.

It rained the night that Leah was raped and she killed her rapists. To Alice, the rain was God's way of purifying the world of their filth. When it rained on Leah when she was making her way to Alice's house, that was God's way of purifying her and making her clean again for Alice to love.

At least, that was how Alice saw it. Alice sighed and climbed out of bed. She walked down the stairs trying to be as quiet as possible, so not to wake Rosalie. She went out the back door and stepped into the rain.

Alice sank to her knees and tilted her head up. She could feel the mud already seeping into the fabric of her pajama pants. The cold rain hit Alice's face, creating the sensation of one thousand needles pricking her face.

She held her hands out to her side and started to pray to the God she'd long lost touch with.

"Cleanse me. Purify me. Make me whole again." She stated, her rough voice just above a whisper. "You cleansed Leah so that I could love her, so cleanse me so I can live without her."

Alice's eyes spilled more tears onto her cheeks at the thought of living without Leah. The cold rain mixed with her hot tears and created a warm liquid that poured into Alice's mouth. She sobbed, a broken sound escaping her throat.

She dropped her hands in front of her and pressed her palms into the squishy mud. It seeped between her fingers. Alice had a sudden thought if her mother could see her now she would likely have a heart attack. She laughed once, even to her it sounded like a psycho's laugh.

Alice hadn't seen her mother since the weekend she and her father left for Porterville. Alice wasn't sure if they were dead or alive or if they even cared about Alice. She didn't think they'd done that much to find her.

Alice bit her lip. Suddenly, two arms wrapped around her waist. Her head snapped up to meet the angry eyes of her best friend, Rosalie.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing in the rain like this, are you fucking stupid?! Get inside!" She yelled, tugging Alice to her feet. Alice trudged through the mud, soaking wet and caked in mud to the back door.

Rosalie handed her a towel and glared at her. "Really, Alice, what the fuck were you doing?"

"I was letting the rain cleanse me." She said, toweling off her hair.

Rosalie said nothing, only nodded. Alice had told her the theory of the rain cleansing Leah for her, so she understood what Alice meant. It broke her heart to see her best friend like this, but what else could she do.

"You should shower." She said. Alice nodded and went up to her room. She grabbed some more clothes and went to the bathroom to shower.

A/N: I couldn't resist posting the first chapter already, especially since the final chapter of "The Secret" was so short. Hope this makes up for it!

Oh yeah...HAPPY BIRTHDAY CullenGurlsDoItBetter! You are now officially old enough to be in the club that Tifa and I have started called the Loveless club. In fact, you should change your name to LovelessGurlsDoItBetter and LCM should change her name to LovelessClearwaterMeraz. We're all Loveless girls at heart. ;)

Thanks for reading! -Loveless-