Chapter 1: Empty Heart

The sun never sets quite the way it used to. The dreams I once held don't seem to matter much anymore. Is that what growing up is? No one ever tells you it will be like this, perhaps they want to mask all the horrors life entails. Because maybe they realize that if we were to truly understand what was to become of us, we would have no desire to continue. No longer will my heart yearn for that beautiful place...that beautiful girl. No, this war has taken all of it. I have no room left to love. Yet I do not fill this heart with hate, it is merely empty; empty of passion, empty of emotion. I'm tired, tired of trying to figure out what I did wrong to deserve this. Will this war ever end? Sometimes I wonder if we fight these wars on purpose. Perhaps we want so badly to feel...to feel anything at all that we tear each other apart. But at the end of the day I feel nothing, nothing at all.

A loud bang resounded through the air, followed by the screams of thousands. Some scream their last breathe while others scream in horror of the scene that unfolds before them. Ed sits off of the front line, awaiting his death. No one will make it out of this war alive. The men have lost all purpose, there is no glory, there is no victory to be had. Both sides have taken such a beating that neither can win. Someone once told him they were fighting for freedom, but as he killed day after day he found it hard to see this freedom they were talking about.

It had been about a month ago when he had heard the news that shattered about the only thing that kept him going. Mustang had approached him, with nothing but a simple telegram. Opening the note he felt the tears fall angry and hard down his face. "Ed…its gone, all of it. They bombed every last inch. Pinako, Winry, Den and Al were not found. I'm so sorry. Riza Hawkeye"

Ed screamed a scream that rang unlike the screams of men on the line. His scream told that of a direct blow to the heart. Every night that he was at this horrible place he would dream of one day walking up that road to his home. He would picture her waiting on the front porch. He cherished this thought, that one day he would be able to return to that life that he wanted so badly to have.

A loud voice interrupted his thoughts, "Haynes, Riley, Munson, Drews, Elric, Anton; you are to lead your men to the east point front line." Ed sat up and started to gather his belongings. He knew where his destiny lay; he had already cheated death for the last time. This time he wouldn't be coming back.

Ed gasped as he held his good arm which was now throbbing with the pain of the shell that had exploded too close for comfort. He could see the shattered piece of metal lodged into his flesh which had caused him to fall to his knees. His ears where ringing as his head seethed in pain. He felt the ground tremble as his vision blurred. He couldn't hold out any longer; with one last look at the scene of death before him he closed his eyes. All he wanted to see was her.

Winry felt the usual wave of nausea sweep over her as they brought in the next group of patients. She looked closely at each of their faces, scanning for that one face she knew she would never see again. It was the same each time. She couldn't forget the sight of her hometown burning to the ground. It was a miracle that they had been away at the time of the bombing. She had left her grandma and Al soon after to go to the front to help assist in any way she could. She couldn't stand and watch while all she knew was blown to pieces, she had to do something. No longer could she wait while she watched the people she loved await their inevitable deaths. She felt that her parents would be proud of her for the decision she made.

It was funny how easy being a surgeon came to her. She was so used to dealing with tools and how the body worked that it suited her very well. Yet being in this environment wasn't at all settling. No matter how many men she saved, there was always the one she couldn't. This tore at every inch of her heart. The harder she worked the closer she felt she was to saving the one person that resided within her heart. "Ed, please be ok."

I guess I'm stuck on this whole love tragedy spiral with EdxWin. I always start off a lil vague and then turn into some sort of random rambling story. I hope you like it.

Until the next time,

Amy