So I promised myself I wouldn't update another fic before I finished the ones I have going on, but guess what? The promises we made ourselves are a lot more difficult to fulfill, right? xD
That said… I'm still writing my final paper and reading a lot, but I was very stressed out these days and I simply needed to write something different. And since I have done well with the exam that scared the hell out of me, I was like…why not?
This idea came to me after I was scrolling through some Sess/Rin fanfics and watching some kdramas. This piece of fiction is influenced by Tuille's "Forget me Not" and 2016 best kdrama "Remember". But only the idea of one's losing the memories, though and the heavy angst content xD The rest is all on me. The fanfiction by Tuille deserves reading though, I plan on reviewing it next holidays or as soon as I have enough time.
And… If you will why not Bleach Movie Fade to Black? But instead of everyone losing the memories of Rukia, she is the only one who forgets the last years of her life and of course Byakuya. And Rukia losing her memories seems to be a cliche of mine. Go check Mesmerized and the The Duke's Lover, rs.
Again, English is not my first language and no matter how much I may proof read this, there will be some mistakes. Hope you can forgive me :3
Disclaimer: Kubo owns Bleach, I own this plot.
Enjoy! xD
Remember
Chapter 1 – Happily ever after...?
A long, happy sigh left her lips as soon as she laid there, raven hair spread on the pillow, violet eyes shining in contentment. By her side, a man also tried to catch his breath, his sweaty chest rose and fell heavily for a few minutes before he was once again the perfect image of self-control.
She was glad their lovemaking had the same effect on him it had on her. He was just so composed sometimes she would doubt he was really a human being.
It lead her to a completely different thought... A new, concerned sigh left her bruised lips. She furrowed her brows as she wondered how her husband was to take the news.
Husband... My husband...
At first, the word brought a bitter feeling to her lips whenever she addressed him by such title — or even thought about this peculiar reality. All of a sudden, she, Ukitake Rukia, became Kuchiki Rukia and Tokyo's most loved and admired woman. Tokyo Princess. The wife of the almighty Kuchiki Byakuya, the most influential businessperson of the year — for five consecutive years —, the Ice King, Tokyo's most desired bachelor, the Iron Fist Businessman. The man every girl her age dreamed to call husband, except for... her of course — but after three years of an unwanted marriage, a marriage none of them desired or longed for... now the word brought a welcomed euphoria. It made her happy. Such title marked him as hers, as much as she was his.
She smiled briefly at the remembrance. Now he was home. She belonged to him.
My husband...
How would he, the Silent King, take her news? Would he be as thrilled as her? After living with him for those years that was surely a reaction she did not expect. Disappointment? Happiness? Maybe.
"Speak," he said, his deep voice still husky. He touched a strand of raven hair and removed it from her face.
"I-I..." She sighed in defeat. It was of no use to lie to him. He knew her so well her lie would not go unnoticed. "I am happy. Tired but happy, that's all."
"Hn," he said, as if still not believing her words.
"I'm glad the new director accepted my project. I'm glad he didn't think our partnership is because I am your wife."
"Why would he?" he asked, his fingers still playing with her hair. It took her a while to notice this, but as he wrapped the strands on his fingers, she realized how much it had grown. Time to cut it again. Bob hair suited her better, or so she thought. "Rukia."
"Everyone thinks you favored me... because well..." She blushed as the words she once heard came back to her mind. She wet her lips nervously before voicing them, "Because I open my legs to you." That was obviously the clean version.
He froze. His hand fell on his sides and his gray eyes became much harder and colder.
"Who said this?"
"Doesn't matter."
"Rukia," he pressed, his lips set in a straight line.
"I'm not telling you!" Her eyes challenged him to force her to speak."It doesn't matter." With a new sigh, she moved his arm aside to place her head on his broad chest. "What really matters is that the director accepted my project and we won the educational prize."
Yes. That's it. What those envious people thought does not really matter anymore. She was happy. Thoroughly satisfied. She was about to finish her master's. Her job could never be better. With this new prize she could help more children and teenagers than she expected. She was happily married... She could certainly not complain. Life had been good for her. Unexpected, sure, but good.
"I am proud of you," he said after a while, making her blush and look at him with widened eyes. His face, however, remained imperturbable, as if he had just bid her goodnight and nothing more.
Those were surprising words. A very unlikely gesture. Her husband was a lot more prone to criticize than to compliment. To hear she was a source of pride for him, a man already so proud — probably the proudest man she had ever met —, was a task she did not thought possible to accomplish.
See? There was nothing in her life she could complain about.
With a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips, she lowered her face and placed a kiss on his chest.
She just missed one little, tiny, small thing...
Shaking her head, she decided it was better to sleep. It was late and she had a lot to do in the next day. Oversleeping was not one of them.
"That's not what you wanted to say."
Her eyes shot open at his words. How could he be so good at reading her? Did he read all her thoughts? She certainly did not sign for this in her marriage contract.
Giving up, she removed herself from his arms and sat on the bed, bent onto him. Sheets wrapped around her torso, she covered her modesty from his prying eyes. At her usual gesture — even after three years she did not enjoy getting naked in front of him. Not when they were to speak of a serious matter at least. Especially in such moments. He would never let her speak, instead, he would not take his hands off of her and words or any coherent thought would fly from her mind. He was frustrating! —, he smirked, an eyebrow lifted lightly.
"Don't look at me like this!" She snapped his hand away. "It seems like I have grown a beard."
"You would look ravishing with a beard."
"I'm serious!" She fought the urge to smile. His hand was then on her face as he pulled her to a kiss. It was so feather-like it felt like a dream. "I love you," she whispered when he released her lips.
Instead of replying, he pulled her to another kiss, deeper and more vehement than the last. Passion irradiated from his very mouth. When they broke apart, he used his thumb to caress her lower lip tenderly. His eyes intensely focused on hers.
He never said those three words. Never. Not even once. At first, it hurt her. Then she realized it was just him. Her husband was not a man of many words. He was silent. Composed. But no less passionate. His love was shown through gestures.
With him, actions spoke louder. With him, words were not necessary at all.
"I have stopped taking the precautions..." Before she could notice, the words escaped her.
His hand stopped the caress at once, but remained on her lower lip.
"Are you...?" If he ever widened his gray eyes, it went unnoticed. He lowered his gaze to her flat belly covered by the white sheets.
She chuckled.
"No..." It would have been fun to watch the ever stoic Kuchiki Byakuya widening his eyes for something else than losing a highly stupid amount of money. "I am not expecting... Yet."
A sigh none of them noticed he was holding, left him.
"Rukia..." He also sat on the bed. With his movement, she almost fell on him. They were much closer now. He was tense when he spoke again, "we have talked about it."
"I spoke to Doctor Unohana. She guaranteed I can make it just fine."
His eyes moved from her expectant face to the mobile phone on the nightstand. Thirty missed calls from some of his partners appeared on the surface. His grandfather was the first to call him and the first to notice he had his reasons to leave the party earlier with his wife.
"I am not lying!"
He was silent for a moment, his eyes still on her face, on her violet orbs. He narrowed his own as he realized she was not going to give up on the idea.
She caught him off guard. Apart from the fact she was on the IUD, they did not take any other precautions against pregnancy. They did not use condoms and she was not on the pill — it was too much dangerous for someone with her condition. Rukia had atrial fibrillation and while it was under control, certain aspects of her life had to be changed. Radically. After her father and his father before him died because of it, it could not be any different. While pregnancy, if taken all the measurements and precautions, could be totally normal, he was still afraid something could happen to her.
Her rushed routine would have to change drastically. He did not think she was ready for that. He was not. Parenthood scared him, even if it was not something he was proud to say, to have a child scared him.
All in all, they still had time.
"Byakuya..."
"I know you are not lying."
She never did. It did not matter their conversation skills were horrible at the beginning, which lead to all sort of misunderstandings between them, she never lied to him. Not even once. Now they worked it just fine.
"Then... Are you not excited to be a dad?"
"We would have to change our routines drastically."
"That's not my question."
There was silence for a moment. She knew he was taking his time to think of his next words carefully.
"Rukia."
"I know it's different for me." She sighed. "I know you are afraid. I am afraid too. But I want it. I want to give you a child."
"I do not need a child."
She knew of his aversion for children. It was funny how he pampered Yachiru so she would just shut the fuck up and leave him alone. However, his words conveyed another meaning.
I only need you.
It made her heart skip a bit. She smiled at him.
Yet, she knew he needed. Their marital agreement was clear: before he was 35, he was to have an heir or else he was to step down from his position as the CEO of the Kuchiki Enterprises. She knew how he prided himself of such position.
He was 32 now, 33 in less than two weeks. They had no more than two years left... having been on the contraceptives for almost seven years, perhaps it would take a while before she got successfully pregnant.
She yawned, finally realizing how tired she was. His hand on her cheeks caressed her lightly, before he kissed her again.
"Let's sleep."
"Wait! Now?"
There was no answer from his part. He turned off the lampshade and lay down on the bed, bringing her to his arms, the blanket placed over both of them. He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes.
"Sleep," he commanded.
"I am not sleepy yet!"
"Rukia..." His voice had a hint of a warning. "Stop talking."
At the strong command — it left no room for disobedience —, she closed her eyes tiredly. Soon, she was fast asleep in his arms. A contended smile on her lips. She knew it would take a while for him to accept her proposal, but eventually he would say yes to her.
He always did.
As he felt her breath became even, he opened his eyes and stared at nothing in the dark. Hands still on her strands, he thought that his young wife would drive him crazy one of these days.
The last of his meetings for the day had just ended when he finally had some chance to scroll through the callings and messages he had received in the last few hours.
Uncountable messages from his grandfather calling him out for his lateness, he missed dinner again, and just one from Rukia.
It looked like Ginrei-sama was his wife and not Rukia herself.
In fact, considering how their relationship had started, it would be completely out of character if she all of sudden became the hysterical wife who called him at every two hours to know of his whereabouts. But she would not even leave more than one message, even if what she had to say was urgent.
All because of him.
Byakuya deeply regretted what he did.
At the very beginning of his marriage — when he hated the fact he had to be eternally tied to her in order to keep his position — he told her he would clearly not tolerate any whims from her part. Their individuality was to be respected. There was no such a thing as to stick the nose in business that was not of her concern. She was to expect he would not do it either.
It was not care. The self-assured Kuchiki Byakuya did not need anyone to look out for him. He was enough. She was... disposable.
Our marriage is fake. Do not try to make it real.
He recalled she had asked about their intimate life. If it was not of each other concern either. He shrugged. If it was for him, he did not care if she had a lover or not. Fidelity was not in the agreement they both signed for. However, he was a public figure and anything related to his personal life could affect the company real badly.
That could surely not happen.
So they faked it. And one day their lie became a reality.
So much changed since then. He had come to terms with being married to her, he learned to care for her; he admitted those feelings to himself even.
He looked at the hour and closed his eyes for a brief moment before he read the messages both of them left. While his grandfather lectured on him for his lateness — he should be really crazy for letting such an adorable wife alone at home and stay focused on work — Rukia sent him a selfie of her and his grandfather dining together, a huge smile on her face and a small, barely noticeable one on his old, wrinkled features.
Yes. He was crazy for having missed dinner. That could not have been any different, however. Not if he wanted to leave for that weekend on the countryside with Rukia at least. And he intended to.
It seems like years since they had last had a few days only for themselves. Rukia thought that after how much they both worked for that educational prize — she indeed barely slept while writing the project — it was only right they took a few days only for them.
Perhaps it could help them think carefully, and she expected, they spent their hours with something else than thinking, about having children.
A small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips when he recalled how he asked her in a deeper and seductive voice if she meant a weekend of thoughtless, lazy sex. Her reaction was pretty much hilarious. Firstly, she blushed, then she became silent and lastly furious. She was serious. He was not to mock her.
In spite of the fact the idea of having a whole weekend only for sex appealed to him very much, he understood her point. She needed to relax. Perhaps after a few days meditating, she would come to realize she was wrong. Children were not what they really needed.
Yes. The weekend in the countryside was surely a good idea.
Nevertheless, for that to happen, he was going to have to work late for the next few days. At least until Thursday.
Scrolling his S6 Edge+, he checked the hour. Almost midnight. She was probably sleeping already, but he decided to give it a try. Loosening his tie, he dialed her number.
Her cheerful voice bombarded him before he could even say anything.
"Have you eaten?"
"I thought you were sleeping."
"She is waiting for you."
"Ginrei-sama..." he greeted, slightly annoyed he could not talk to his wife privately. He did not have anything secretive or improper to say, but he still would like to talk to her alone.
"You are late, Byakuya." His tone was accusatory, as if his grandson missed dinner and time with his wife because he wanted to. Because he had other choice and instead chose to be inside his office being tortured meeting after meeting.
"I was preparing the documents for sending the equipment for the school." He did not know if he was explaining himself to her or apologizing, or which was more ridiculous, because none made sense or suited his character.
"It's okay," she said softly. "After we are back from the weekend we are to hold both yours and the company's anniversary and it will take us a lot of time." Her last words came out with a yawn.
"Rukia," he called. As he heard a low yes, he continued, "go to sleep. I am not going to arrive any time soon."
"Yes, I will. Eat something before you come home."
He gave her no reply before he went to end the call. His grandfather, however, caught his attention. It did not surprise him she left her mobile phone with him, what was indeed a shock was that he wanted to continue to lecture him on things he had no control over. If someone told him a few years ago Ginrei-sama would take the side of his granddaughter-in-law to such extent he would have laughed.
"See? Your young wife is too much comprehensive for you."
"Hn," he replied, typing away the e-mails he was sending his secretary. Nanao would schedule those meetings first thing in the morning. There was just so many of them, he wondered when he would have the next lunch alone, by himself, without having to socialize or decide something important for the company.
The Kuchiki Enterprise was among the ten best Asian companies in the technology and software industry. When he was about to meet Rukia and discover she was to be his wife, his grandfather decided it was safe for them to go further in the branch of educational software and games. After their marriage and how Rukia brilliantly excelled in educational conferences, his family business rose to the top, evaluated as the best software-based company for the last two years. Her ability to make people believe in a better tomorrow and excellent education, coupled with good technology for everyone, was more than responsible for such a feat. She was responsible for sealing deals with enterprises that proved to be really useful. In short, Byakuya did not really believe his skills would ever be enough to lead him to the top and to win the prizes he had during their four year relationship.
It was selfish of him to admit it, but he only stopped seeing her as the pathetic wife his grandfather chose when he realized she was more than her childish looks conveyed. It was somehow good to know they matched in and out of bed.
"I mean it, Byakuya." His voice was almost harsh now. He frowned and returned his attention back to the old man. "You should treat her better. She is unique."
He agreed to disagree with his grandfather. She was unique, true, but he did treat her well enough. There was not a single moment he could recall of her complaining about his demeanor towards her.
Not that she would either.
This thought made his fingers stop. Was he a bad husband?
"You should take her out more often. And by out I mean to the cinema, not the highest ball of another huge enterprise. She loves dancing. Have you ever danced with her again apart from your wedding or any other stupid event of high society?"
He fell silent. The answer was no, no and no. No to all those options. A tired sigh left his lips as he realized he was not a bad husband. He was a terrible husband.
"I want grand grandchildren, Byakuya."
At the mention of children, he sat still on his chair.
"Ojii-sama," he started but was interrupted by Ginrei's imperial voice.
"But she is still very young. Use your time to make her happy. She is not Tokyo's beloved princess. She is your wife and she is just so very young. Do not waste her years working so much. Go back to her arms."
And just then all of sudden, before he could give any response the line went dead.
For a few minutes he looked at his laptop completely still. Then he blinked twice and realized he was very tired. He could not recall the last time he got the proper eight hours sleep. It seemed like centuries since he was not focused in work and did something else of his life than think about meetings, conferences, agreements, more meetings and annoying parties of the high society.
His grandfather's outburst although out of time was not so unexpected. He knew where it came from. Ginrei-sama was as much as workaholic as him, he barely had time for his wife and his son. Before he could enjoy his time with her, she left this world delivering his second child, which also died a few hours after he was born.
However, as much as Byakuya worked a lot, he never neglected Rukia. Perhaps at the beginning, but that was a mutual agreement.
Young wife...
That he would have to agree.
Rukia was 26 now. A gap of six years kept them apart. She was 22 when they met — a fateful day at the school she worked at and they both learned they were to get married. He was already 28 at that time and the thought of getting married to her was ridiculous. She was no more than a teenager to him. How was he expected to marry an adolescent?
It is not that she was too young. He was the one who was old. 32 years and he seemed like he was at least 70. He never realized she was perhaps interested in going to the cinema. To dance all night with him or just have a simple date. To be by his side away from everything and everyone.
He was so much beyond that. The fact she never complained — of course she would not — never made him realize how thoughtless he was.
Closing his laptop, he decided that whatever he still had to do, was not so urgent that could not wait for tomorrow.
It was past three in the afternoon when she placed her hands over her face. An annoying headache had been plaguing her that week, but it worsened that night after she woke up three times. At first, she had been worried because it was past midnight and he was still not home. Then, when she was almost sleeping, she felt the bed moving under his weight, even if he commanded her to go back to sleep so it would ease her headache, it took her a while to fall into unconsciousness again. And lastly, when it was almost five, with his mobile phone ranging annoyingly loud by their side.
Shaking such thoughts away, she concentrated on the class she was preparing and tried to finish the correction of the exams she applied last week. With her students on verge of applying for the University she thought it was best if she gave them the opportunity to train a bit more. While she disagreed with the entrance exams, if she could not change the system yet, she would do what she could to help her students.
Her fingers were fast on the keyboard, typing away the general comments to make about the exams when her vision suddenly went blurry. She blinked several times, thinking that it was somehow related to the fact she could not eat the entire day. At least, not properly. With her stomach upset, there was not much she could eat without making it worse.
"Oi, midget! Are you fine?"
"Hm… Yes, Ichigo," she answered meekly, which caused him to frown. It did not matter she was a married lady now, whenever he alluded to her height, she would always smack him senseless or scream at him for being so stupid. She would never answer in such a defeated tone.
"Water?" he offered, still shocked that she did not curse him out loud. He placed his hand on her shoulder and surprisingly she did not snap it away, which could only mean she was not that fine. Far from it, if her pale face and dry lips were of any indication.
Rukia nodded.
Kneeling by her side, placed the plastic cup in her hand and waited, his face contorted into a worried grimace.
"Rukia?"
"I am fine, idiot," she grunted, pressing her lids together. The idea of opening her eyes too much painful. She was afraid she would pass out if she did, but she forced herself to. Fluttering them open slowly, she came to the sudden realization that everything was already dark in front of her and the scandalously amount of co-workers around her, asking if she was fine when she obviously was not did not help her headache even the tiniest bit.
Even the faintest whisper was enough to make her want to cry in desperation. Blinking several times, she sighed in relief when her sight came back to her. She rose from her seat and went to her locker, desperate to get her medicines and swallow the pills to relieve the pain. Hands shaking, she retrieved the mobile phone from her pockets and decided if she should send her husband a message or not. She knew she would not have any condition to drive back home that day.
He was probably attending to an urgent meeting or a conference right now and her disturbance would be seen as totally uncalled for. However, he was the one to say she was to interrupt at any time if she was not feeling well… Yet, he was also the one to say she was never to behave as the stupid needy wife.
Fingers still trembling over the keys, she battled with herself unsure of what to do. Luckily, her headache seemed to subside after she drank the water Ichigo offered her. She smiled weakly and decided against bothering him.
She could wait.
Get a taxi. Force her stupid friend to drive her home.
Anything was better than interrupting him.
With a sigh, she blocked the screen of her S6 Edge+ — which had a photo of them, in one rare moment she convinced him, or surprised him, if she were to be honest with herself, into taking a selfie — and walked back to the table, curious faces still glued on her as she made her way to them. Suddenly, she lost her balance and fell on the floor, a new strong wave of headache reached her, forcing her to cradle her head between her fingers and hiss in pain.
By her side, Ichigo kneeled and removed her hands from her head, forcing her to meet his eyes. However, she did not have enough time to register him calling out her name worriedly, nor to see his hazel orbs narrowing with concern.
Next thing she knew, everything went black for real.
He moved uncomfortably in his chair at the head of the table. He checked his wrist-watch to check the hour and realized he was in that meeting with the accounting head and the marketing staff for what seemed a whole day, even if had only passed 30 minutes. He looked at the graphics in the data show and blinked a few times, cursing his inability to stay focused.
It was totally unlike him, but he noticed he was not uneasy just now. It had been this way since that morning, when he bid Rukia a good day and waited for her to leave the garage with her white new beetle — he was still trying to convince her to change her old car into a smaller version of the SUV they had to travelling, it was safer and more comfortable, but she was against spending so much money into something completely unnecessary —, to follow after her with his Chrysler 300C. They quickly parted ways and before he could even notice, he was inside his office, getting ready for a full day of annoying meetings.
He thanked the heavens it was already Thursday and the next day he would leave earlier for his weekend with Rukia. Last time he checked his schedule there was only one lunch he expected to attend with his lawyer and while he was expected to return on Sunday, he was really not inclined to return exactly on that day. If possible, Monday… after lunch. Rukia did not have classes that day, so it was not really a problem if they returned later than the planned. He was sure she would enjoy it spending one more day at their house in Hida-Takayama. She always loved the feeling of the mountains and the little traditional shops.
Thinking about Rukia… He closed his eyes at the remembrance of her and her strong headaches. If she was not better by the time he arrived home, there would be no discussion: he would drive her to the hospital.
Byakuya still recalled how she moved uncomfortably when he joined her last night and brought her to his arms. She grunted, asking if he had eaten properly — her obsession with his eating habits amused him to no end, even if he knew she was right. He spent so much time in meetings or locked inside his office he barely had any time to eat — and closed her eyes forcefully when she thought he was about to turn on the lamplight. When he asked if she was quite alright, she even tried to lie, but knew better than that and admitted she was having a strong headache and her heart was racing more than normally that day.
Kissing her temple, he embraced her and commanded her to sleep, even if he spent the whole night wide awake, afraid her condition would get worse while he was asleep. He dozed off a few minutes, but whenever he woke up, he would scold himself for being so weak.
Was she better now?
He shook such thoughts away. If she were not she would have called already. Right?
Don't ever call while I am in a meeting. I do not need a hysterical, needy wife.
Well… As far as he was aware, they were past this in their relationship, but with Rukia one could never know. He touched his tie, loosening it slightly. He was suddenly feeling suffocated. His gray eyes shifted back to his mobile phone, but there was nothing… No message, no missed calls. Nothing.
He was overreacting.
All at once, the device in his hands vibrated and the loud sound echoed in the meeting room — he always left it on the silent mode, but afraid he would not notice if she called, he decided to turn on the sound — startling a couple of people. Byakuya looked down and noticed her name on the screen.
It was definitely important. If it was not, she would never call. Under absolutely no circumstance. He felt his heart racing at the idea of her being badly sick.
He lifted two fingers, motioning they could go on with the meeting, as he rose from his chair and left the room. Clearing his throat, he called her name.
"Rukia."
"Yo, Byakuya." A man spoke nervously in the other line. He narrowed his eyes slightly at the way he was greeted, but quickly dismissed it. The P.E teacher was known by his lack of education for someone older or higher than him. What stood out the most was his voice. It was not the usual relaxed tone. It was different.
"Kurosaki Ichigo," he acknowledged. "Why are you with Rukia's phone?"
"Well…" he started, but stopped all of sudden. "I am in the hospital with her."
By the time he noticed it was not Rukia on the phone he was already gesturing for Nanao to end the meeting and entering the elevator, her voice far away as she asked what happened. However, when the word Hospital reached his ears, he was walking to his car in the entrance of the building. The valet opened the door for him and eyed him surprisingly as he did not voice his thanks — a habit he acquired after he married Rukia — and left.
"What happened?"
"It's not confirmed just yet, but I suspected it was a stroke."
His heart seemed to stop for a moment, but then it was galloping inside his chest. He pressed his feet on the accelerator and passed the red lights, not really caring about the traffic ticket that would be waiting for him soon or the amount of angry horns he had to listen from those who had to stop suddenly in order not to crash onto him on the crossroad.
"Which hospital?"
Her hand was pale and skinny placed between his. He held hers carefully, afraid the warmth would leave her and the death would take her away from him.
Three weeks since the fateful calling from Kurosaki Ichigo. Three weeks since he last saw her expressive violet orbs open. His birthday had come and passed and if not for his secretary, he would not even remember he was turning 33. They were to celebrate it with the anniversary of the company, but he had no will to. Yet, his grandfather forced him to attend to the ceremony, after all uncountable shareholders would make an appearance and would like to see their CEO. He was there, but at the same time he was not. The national press was aware of Rukia's condition and they would not stop asking him if he missed her badly or what he would not give to have her by his side again, in perfect conditions.
Nothing like a tragic love story to keep people's faith in feelings such as love. And the press knew how to manipulate it quite well. He had to give them that.
All of sudden, they graced the covers of magazines, newspapers and became the hot topic in the TV newscast. The whole country was shocked the Tokyo's most beloved child was ill. Tons of tragic stories graced the tabloids, those people even found out — he was pretty much curious to know how — they wanted to have a child. It did not take a genius to have people commenting that she had an abortion and he was desolated by that.
Even the Ice King would be devastated by such loss.
And no matter how much he despised their scrutiny, he could not deny it did an immense good to his Empire. The company stocks skyrocketed. His account staff would be joyous, he thought bitterly.
The annoying teacher, that friend of hers, was right. He was right. It was a stroke. The symptoms came suddenly and there was nothing they could really do to prevent it besides what they had already been doing. It was not bound to happen to her, but if it did, it would not be such a surprise after all.
Doctor Unohana, however, guaranteed, she would wake up anytime soon. The worst had passed. If he just could talk to her, perhaps she would have an extra reason to wake up earlier.
Byakuya tried. He really did. But words failed him. What should he say? That he missed her? That he cared for her? Gosh, he never really said how much she meant to him — he was not even sure if he realized the place she had in his heart before the whole thing — even if she said more than once she loved him.
Whenever she would voice her feelings, he would answer with a kiss, a touch or anything else that he thought would make her realize she was important, even thought he was not sure how to express it.
Even now, as he sat still thinking of what to say to her, he realized he could not find the proper words to say what he wanted to say. With a sigh, he let go of her hand and walked to the bathroom in the VVIP room. Byakuya turned on the tap and looked ahead. The face staring back at him in the mirror seemed much older than his 33 years self. His beard had grown more than he would ever let it and he had lost weight — if Rukia was always worried about how much he ate during the day, what she would say once she woke up? If she ever did.
Doctor Unohana was optimistic but she did not lie. It could be that she spent the rest of her life in the limbo. Or even woke up but was not able to recover her movements fully, or stopped talking, or lost her cognitive ability or lost all her memories of him. He did not know what was worse: the possibility of her spending the rest of her days in a coma or losing all her memories of him and their three year marriage.
While the memories were something she could recover, it could be a traumatic process that could hurt her and mark her forever.
He looked at the water running down the tap and wet his hands, washing his face afterwards. The chilling liquid woke him up instantly. He dried his face and thought that he should bring his razor blade from home or buy one as soon as possible.
His looked horrible.
Not that his looks mattered that much when he spent his days in the hospital, monitoring her every movement. His grandfather assumed his vacant position as the CEO and took over all the annoying meetings he kind of missed. However, he knew he was in no condition to attend to them.
Both of them decided it was best if he continued to work, but relatively less than he normally would and only using his laptop in the hospital. He barely went home. Only to leave his clothes so the maid would wash them and get a new stack so he would not have to drive home every day. When he needed to call someone, he would go to the roof and enjoy the freezing winds of the beginning of February as he took a breath from his wife and her dead-looking face.
It was in one of those moments that he meditated on what he should do from now on with their relationship once she woke up — he realized how much of a loser he sounded when he gave room for bad thoughts. It had to somehow change. He had to change. He could not expect her to keep on saying that she loved him, hear nothing in return and keep on saying it happily nonetheless.
It did not mean he was ready to say he loved her… Speak the three words, but he could try to be more vocal from now on, right?
A sigh escaped his lips as he removed his hair from his face and tied it in a loose and low ponytail. He arranged the blanket over himself and shut his eyes, waiting for sleep to overcome him. The uncomfortable armchair where he had been sleeping for the past few weeks did not help the tiniest bit.
Before long, he was recalling the first time she said she loved him. They were dancing in a stupid ball of the high society. She was drunk. Her small hands clung onto him as he led her out of the ballroom to a more secluded area where he could chastise her for her carelessness.
They had been married for over a year and while they had been intimate already, they never talked too much or shared confidences. That night, however, she had been furious with him for some reason he could not begin to understand. When he pressed her, she let out. So frankly it stunned him at first. She was mad for he did not pay attention to her the whole night and instead chatted the whole time with an impossibly tall, dark beauty of mischievous golden eyes.
Byakuya knew he should be mad at her for behaving like the stupid needy wife he warned her not to be. But he was not. Instead, he smirked. Rukia was jealous.
He recalled having taking her in his arms when he thought she was about pass out — and indeed she did a few seconds after she confessed her feelings for him. I know I sound stupid, but I love you.
At that time, he did not have the opportunity to reply. Besides having a drunken sleeping wife in his arms, he was too stunned to even form the words. But there were other occasions and yet he never said anything to her love confessions…
Not even once.
Yes. Their relationship should change. No… It had to.
He would change.
For her.
"Isn't he a very thoughtful husband?" one of the nurses spoke to the other as together they left third door in the VVIP area, carrying the trolley with medicines and gauze and everything they needed to attend to a patient.
"Isn't she a lucky lady?" the other commented, sighing dreamily. "I wished to be in her toes. The Lady Kuchiki is the luckiest woman to ever walk the Earth."
Rukia closed the door and pressed her head against it, sliding slowly to the floor. Her heart thundered in her chest as she heard their steps coming closer to her room and then driving away. A sigh of relief left her lips as she realized no one would bother her anytime soon.
Everything in her head was confusing. She did not know where she was — it did not take a genius to realize she was in a hospital, but she was in the VVIP area! Not even if she got the dream job in one of the most expensive schools of the country she could afford to pay the bills of the most expensive hospital of the entire Tokyo.
And that was not all.
When she woke up, unaware of her surroundings, she found a laptop in an armchair, an expensive one on top of that, and a mobile phone she recognized as hers — it had her picture even if a handsome stranger seemed to hug her — nearby and the bracelet on her wrist identified her as Ms. Kuchiki.
Who was this Kuchiki?
Her surname was Ukitake. She was single. Who on Earth was this Kuchiki?
She had only known a Kuchiki in her entire life and he seemed to be a cunning, intractable man she gladly did not have the displeasure to meet. Her boyfriend did and he seemed to think he was a very spoiled playboy who knew nothing about being courteous to anyone. Not that Abarai Renji could be a model of politeness, but if there was someone below him in such matters, it could mean this Mr. Kuchiki sucked at relationships.
Yet… This vision she had of him did not match what she heard of the nurses leaving the other room or when they came to tend to her.
Yes, she was awake since the couple of nurses visited her and changed the IV and dosed the medicine. It was bound to leave her sleepy, she knew, but she fought it. She was about to ask them to stop that and talk to them, but she prevented herself as soon as one of them mentioned this Mr. Kuchiki and how worn out he seemed as he stood by the side of his young wife.
He seems hollow. Destroyed.
She recalled one of them saying it. And it only was enough to capture her attention. Who was this man that seemed to love his wife so deeply he left his company to tend to her? Somehow, she also felt this was a very lucky woman. And how bad he must be feeling to disregard his appearance and everything else because of the illness of his wife.
But then she realized that Mr. Kuchiki was a very cold man. A man everyone dread. A man as aggressive in his private life as in business. A man who conquered it all, regardless of other's wishes. A man so selfish it made her shiver. He was the reflex of the very wild capitalism in its worse.
Later, when the couple of babbling nurses left, she noticed the bracelet she was wearing…
Her eyes went wide as she sat numbly on the bed and removed the IV from her arm. Her head still ached, but she did not have much time to think about it. She fumbled through her belongings and looked for her Sony Xperia E — a new mobile phone Renji had pampered her with when they celebrated their two year relationship and the 15 long years they had known each other — but found instead a Samsung model she could not even recognize but that seemed very, very advanced for 2012.
Her head hurting like hell, she fumbled with the device but still managed to dial Renji's number. The only one she could ever think of calling. He had answered with a yawn and she realized it was not even past 06 a.m. He seemed stunned she asked in a crying voice to see him, desperate to understand something and place the pieces together, but promised to go nonetheless.
Now, still sitting against the door, her arm hurting and bloodied — it was not a smart idea to yank off the IV so harshly —, she looked at the mobile phone in her arms and waited for him to arrive. As the minutes went by and to prevent herself from falling asleep in the floor, she decided to look through it, so something could make sense in her confused head.
It did not.
There were several pictures of the man that hugged her in the background. There were pictures of them together. Pictures of him alone. Videos… There was a silly video of him brushing his teeth. It was so childish it made her smile before she could even realize what she was doing. She was asking of him to smile more, so that people would find him handsomer and he replied he was already handsome enough. The image then zoomed on his face and then when he moved his hand to force her to stop recording, she moved it to the floor, but not before catching a glimpse of his nude chest and the trousers hanging loosely on his hips.
Next thing she knew, the image moved to the ceiling and she was squeaking and ordering him to let her go and put her on the floor. There was no answer from his part as the video went off.
As if burned by her own happiness with another man, Rukia pushed the mobile phone away from her and hugged her legs close to her chest. It seemed hours have passed and she started dozing off when someone knocked on the door.
She froze at first, but as she recognized the owner of such voice, she raised her head with a velocity that made it ache a lot. A smile on her lips, she moved from the door and let him open it.
"Renji!" she spoke, throwing herself at him, embracing him by the waist. He seemed stiff at first, but his arms wrapped around her frame carefully in the next second.
They stayed in each other's arms for what seemed like an eternity. She breathed in his scent and sighed in contentment. Yes, even if nothing else made sense, Renji still smelled the same. His arms around here were still protective and he was still as tall as she recalled.
If she had him, there was nothing else that could not be amended.
However, the dream-like embrace did not last an eternity as she would have liked. He seemed stiff and uncomfortable as he moved her slightly away to look into her eyes.
"Rukia," his voice was uncertain as he looked at her face in confusion. He scratched his read. "Why did you call me? What happened to your…"
Before he could finish his sentence, they were stopped by moderate steps entering the room. The man of her mobile phone was carrying a cup of what seemed coffee — no, he hates coffee — in his left hand, the right busy with a mobile phone equal to her own.
"Rukia…" His deep voice sent shivers to her spine.
She closed her eyes briefly. It… the voice seemed so familiar, but at the same time…
Renji tried to let go of her as he looked at the man entering the room, but she did not allow. Instead, her grip over him tightened. She looked at the man and wondered what he was doing in her room and why, unlike the man in her pictures, he seemed so much older, tired and sad. Handsome, yes, but so gloomy it made her feel bad for him.
Before she could realize, she walked to him and stopped a mere inches before she could invade his personal space. He was tall… smaller than Renji, true, but still tall. He looked at her, still holding the cup of tea — now she knew it was tea because she could smell the matcha — and the mobile phone. His eyes were intense, unwavering as they drank in her form. Curiosity took over her. She wanted to know why his gray eyes looked so… full of untold and well guarded emotions… Sadness, desperation, relief, happiness, fear… She raised her left hand to touch his face, now completely forgotten of Renji's very existence, but stopped at the pull on her head.
Her breath caught on her throat as the words left her lips.
"Who… Who are you?"
A/N – And this has got to be my longest first chapter hehe Again, it's me!
A few explanations: it's angst, sure, but there will be light moments. For those who may be afraid after reading Angst/Romance at the genres. It's a mature fiction, which does not mean there will be lemons every chapter. Sorry. But there will be some xD What I like the most about Remember is the age of the two of them. Contrary to my other fics, here they are older and I hope I can make their problems more real too. What I regret the most with The Duke's Lover is their young age, but in 1816, being 25 is about the same as being 40 nowadays…
I was recently discussing with some friends (Thalita and Ludmilla, if I do not thank her, she will come here and scream at me all over again, bitch) that my favorite part was building relationships, not showing relationships already formed. And simply I start a fanfiction in which there is already a bound, a relationship, which is currently broken… They will have to rebuild it. It's going to be fun to write this fic. A challenge. This time there will be no giant plot or subplots or whatsoever, it's just about Byakuya and Rukia.
A very distant relative of mine lost her memories once, due to a stroke. Same conditions as Rukia, but she was much older, 50 years. While it's rare for such a young person to have a stroke, it's possible. Well, this distant cousin of mine lost all of her memories of the last 20 years. She didn't remember her husband, her children and she never recovered her memories fully. It was shock for the family and mainly for her 8 year old son. I don't know what I'm gonna do with Rukia's memories, though.
Chapter 2 is almost ready, so I'll try to update in 20 days at most. I have a big project to write, so… you know… Ah, thanks to Flávia and Roberta who helped me with this chapter. Love you, girls!
I'm not really enthusiastic this will get as much reviews as The Duke's Lover, but I decided to give it a try nonetheless… Hope you like it. If you feel like, leave me a review. I'd love to know your thoughts.
Take care,
Velvetsins.