Burning Bridges
By: sajiwara
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto (unfortunately).
Sakura never fully understood the meaning of loneliness until he left.
During that time period, she fell into a state of despair, desperately trying to wake up from this nightmare. By day, she drowned herself in work, and by night, she stared beyond the emptiness of her window, wishing that the earth would swallow her whole.
Though her skin marred no scars, she was cut so deep, it was now numb when she bled.
There were permanent shadows under her eyes from the lack of sleep. During those nights, she would sit by the gates, waiting. She cried until her voice cracked. Until her eyes burned as much as her heart. Until her eyes forcefully shut on her, rendering her in a horror filled slumber.
It was always the same dream. As if it was an omen telling her that he would never come back — that he would eventually die on the battlefields.
And in the morning, Naruto would always find her — huddled in the small space beside the gate doors. He would never ask her. He would only carry her small, and very frail body back to her house.
Sakura always woke with undried tears on her cheeks. The waterworks would start again because those stains weren't hers...they were Naruto's. He cried for her… and he cried for him.
They never once talked about this. There was a mutual understanding of this unfathomable pain.
Naruto made it a life promise that he would bring him back, but she already knew, the moment he left — that Sasuke was never coming back… that this road was forever chained off and closed.
They were now sixteen. It's been years since she saw him. She tells herself that she no longer misses him. That the pain was gradually decreasing everyday.
She goes out with Ino and the rest of the teams now. She would down the alcohol under the pretence of relieving stress. She would let other guys hit on her, kiss her in the alley, and bring her to bed.
Sakura drags herself out of bed each morning, forgetting the events of the previous night, and like a machine — she would start her day the very same way. She would end it just like any other night. If the others were on missions, she would go to the bars alone, smile ever so present on her face.
She would never remember the guys' names because it didn't matter. She would make sure all the blinds were closed, and that it was pitch black before letting them take her.
It was not until Tsunade noticed her unhealthy habit before this all came to a halt. Naruto had returned after his training with Jiraiya, and they were sent out on a rescue mission of the Kazekage.
It was only with Naruto's return that Sakura began piecing herself together. He slowly brought her back to life, giving her the strength that she lacked all these years.
However, she knew things were too good to last.
After learning about Sasori's spy, a newly formed Team Kakashi was to bring back any new information on Orochimaru and the Akatsuki.
Sometimes, Sakura wondered what kind of plans God had in mind for her, because not long after her heart started mending, it was torn once more.
"Sakura, huh."
That voice.
"Sasuke-kun…" She didn't know why she called out his name. Nor did she understand why the hell she attached the suffix.
Maybe it was to reassure herself that it was really him. Perhaps Uchiha Sasuke was still there. Her Sasuke-kun.
He was still as painstakingly beautiful as she remembered. His face was now more defined, and his hair was longer, bangs swaying swiftly in the wind.
But they weren't what made heart tug.
It was his eyes.
They were an abyss of black, void of any emotion. Whatever sliver of light they had when he was twelve was gone.
The wave finally hit her. Sasuke was long gone, he was already dead. What stood before her right now, is merely a living shell of what he used to be. This new reflection only lusted after a single goal — to kill his brother, even at the cost of ridding his ex-teammates.
He attacked them. What made her curious though, was the fact that she was still standing while her teammates were still paralyzed from his Chidori Nagashi.
Naruto… the bastard attacked his own brother, the only person who understood what she was going through. She would not have it.
Running with a charged fist, she caught a glimpse of Sasuke's confused expression. Her pulse raced, not knowing what the look entailed. She tried blocking it out, but his expression soon turned to anger as he raised his sword towards her.
They had failed.
Again.
They went home without Sasuke…
There was no look of confusion, or a moment of hesitation when he pointed his Chidori at her this time. And as if her heart wasn't shattered enough already, he aimed for a second time with her own kunai.
She wasn't suicidal. She wasn't.
It wasn't until Sakura saw the kunai coming, did she slack into his hold. She would often wonder if he'd have any remorse in killing her. If running a poisoned kunai through her heart would ease his pain, maybe she'd let him have this.
After all… she did love him, right?
Her heart had beat for him, and if he couldn't die by her hands — then she would die by his.
I love you… so much.
Kakashi's screams rang out as she held her breath: "SASUKE!"
It was not until during the midst of war did she see him again.
A year had flown by, and now they were facing the final battle between Madara and Naruto.
She was supposed to fall back with the rest of the medic team, but she didn't. She slipped past Shizune and headed towards finding the one man that drove this war to madness.
Find the man whose hatred extends beyond just those who were involved in the Uchiha massacre. And when she stands before him, she would not try to persuade him to come back like she did so many years ago.
She had one clear purpose. If he didn't surrender — she would kill him.
"Uchiha Sasuke, you are a war criminal, and currently at the top of the bingo list. You are to surrender immediately."
"Sakura," his voice was soft, yet firm. "What are you doing here?"
"Do not make me repeat myself. If you don't, I'll have no choice but to take you by force. Or kill you, whichever deems necessary."
"Why?"
While Sakura was on the defense with her right hand firmly gripping a kunai, getting ready to attack — Sasuke hadn't moved a muscle.
All he did was stare at her. With that similar confused expression from Orochimaru's hideout.
There it was again — that flicker of something in his eyes…that slight movement of his fingers. She didn't know what it was, but at this point, she no longer cared.
Enough of her comrades had died in this war against Madara's team. This is no longer the time to let her old feelings of Sasuke resurface.
They might as well have been destroyed, along with his soul, years ago.
"I'm taking that as a no."
"Don't fight me, Sakura."
Furious at his implication that her abilities were not up to par with his, she launched her kunai. He dodged with ease, and was not surprised by the slightest when the earth beneath him rumbled and split.
She knew the final battle with Sasuke was supposed to be reserved for Naruto, but she didn't care. She was supposed to be a part of Team 7 too. Yet, it was her that would always watch their backs.
She always took a backseat whenever they fought...whenever they did anything together. She needed to make this statement — she trained hard these few years with Tsunade just for this moment.
She was going to prove herself, right here, right now, to the man she fell in love with.
She punched the earth again, uprooting trees while Sasuke continued to dodge.
"WHY ARE YOU NOT ATTACKING, SASUKE?" She was angry. Did he still think that she was weak?
Forming chakra scalpels, she charged towards him.
Just as the tip of the scalpel touched his shoulders, he turned and pinned her against the tree.
"Don't do this," he gritted.
She disengaged her attack and let her arms drop.
He was so close. She could smell him…touch him. "Please come back…"
Silence.
She broke all rules when she let herself cry in front of him again. There it was — that pain in her chest...that ache. He didn't land a single hit on her, but she was bleeding again.
She was burning in the untamed fire, her breath was ragged and her heart was constricted. The pounding in her head only beat louder as she drowned herself in his scent.
She needed to know…
"Sasuke…"
"Sakura," he breathed, "I'm will destroy Konoha. I will kill Naruto."
"Please…"
"Nothing has changed."
His voice was fading, and she didn't want to hear it. She gave him one last chance, only to hear that he insisted on taking the other route.
Her Sasuke was already lost in the sea, and beyond her reach. He had made his final choice…and now she will make hers.
She took his hand in hers, and slowly raised it to where her broken heart was.
"I love you."
And with his hand still in hers, she thrusted the chakra scalpel into her heart.
It was odd...
She found peace in the most ironic situations. They were at war, and she was held against a tree by her former teammate — but she never felt so relieved.
As her vision began to blur, she made out the panic in Sasuke's eyes as he shook her…yelling her name.
Like the rest of the fallen shinobis due to the war, she will never grow old, and she will never have a family of her own…Because that fantasy was buried the day Sasuke left.
It was quiet as she fell deeper and deeper into the darkness, and memories of their genin days replayed for the very last time.
When she was first infatuated with the raven-haired boy…
When she was put on the same team as him…
When they had their first mission to the Wave…
When he nearly died during the chunin exams…
When she fell in love with him…
And when he left…
Her love for Sasuke was a burning bridge…so unconditionally deep, and had irreversibly taken the road with no exit.
A/N: Er...this story has a completely different feel than Beauty Queen. Tell me what you guys think though :)!
With regards to my other story Red... I'm working on the next chappie. It'll probably be up around next week.