Everlasting bond

by LovelessDestiny

Clint/Phil slash. Ever since an experiment Clint and Phil can feel each others emotions, and they're married. The Avengers distrust Clint but that changes after Phil returns from the dead and shows them what a beautiful person his husband is. But before Phil can do that he has to find his husband who's MIA. In short: from distrust to being a family.

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing but my crazy imagination.

Rating: T, I'm paranoid.

Paring: Clint/Phil

Warning: Violence, swearing

A./N.: A little story that wouldn't let go of me. It turned out longer than I expected.

The information's I have about Harbin are from Wikipedia so I don't know if it's correct or not, I used it the way I needed it.

I think the beginning of the story is a little rocky but it gets better :)

I wish you all Happy Holidays.

::::::::::::::::

"I don't want him on the team," Tony vetoed.

Clint looked up in surprise. "Why?" he had smiled at Natasha a moment ago and now the situation had shifted drastically.

"You were compromised and you killed friends of mine, our friends," he couldn't look at the archer who was involved in the mess.

"It wasn't me," he denied.

Steve glared at him and Bruce seemed to share Tony's opinion.

"You killed Coulson, his blood is on your hands, and you have the nerve to sit here and smile happily at Black Widow like a lovesick teenager." Tony did what he did best, aiming to hurt.

Well chosen words used like daggers.

Clint was speechless, there was nothing he could say. He knew that Phil was alive, because he bugged Nick for hours until he confessed that he lied.

Clint could feel that his husband was alive, their bond was still intact, humming comfortingly in his veins, heart and soul.

Natasha knew that too, he told her that Phil was not dead and that he would prove it to her.

To her relief the archer was right, otherwise she wouldn't have known how to keep him alive.

"Tony is right we aren't sure that we can trust you," Steve agreed and that hurt more than Stark's outburst.

Captain America was a kind-hearted and forgiving man, and that he of all people expressed his reluctance to forgive him was more than disturbing.

"I want to make more tests." Bruce eyed the archer, "I want to make sure you're free of his influence."

"No," Clint shook his head, getting up. "I have better things to do than playing lab-rat."

Natasha got up and followed Clint out of the room, "Where are we going?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D," Barton stated while he manhandled the elevator button.

"Home, then," she nodded her consent. "You know they are wrong, right?!"

"They are not," he never believed that he was innocent.

Natasha decided to shoot Stark at the next best opportunity, Phil had needed days to convince Clint that he was alright and that his injury wasn't the archer's fault.

Nothing was his fault.

::::::::::::

"Clint?" Phil shifted in his bed, wincing as the movement pulled on his still healing wound.

"They say I killed you, that I have your blood on my hands," he stood near the door, staring at Phil without blinking.

He was lost in his mind and Phil hated to see him like that.

"Come here," Phil reached out. "Come."

Clint stepped closer and took the hand Phil offered.

"He controlled your mind," the older man said serious. "There was nothing you could have done to prevent what happened. He used your knowledge against your will. The Barton I know would never do such things. The man I love would rather die than kill friends and comrades."

"I feel guilty," he sat on the edge of the bed. "I can't get rid of the feeling."

Phil knew that most people didn't trust him anymore and that he had a long way to go to make them understand that he was his old self again. "I trust you, Natasha trusts you, Nick trusts you. That is enough for the beginning. We are the three most important persons in your life after all."

A small smile appeared on Clint's lips, "I'd like to earn their trust, too. I can't be with you when I'm not an Avenger."

"Who says that?" Phil tugged on Clint's arm, pulling him closer.

Clint took off his shoes and climbed onto the bed, carefully avoiding the tubes or jostling accidently against the wound, "Nick said he makes you their handler."

"I will act as a link between S.H.I.E.L.D and the Avengers, you and Natasha will remain my main task, no matter what he says," he was Hawkeye's and Black Widow's handler, nothing would ever change that.

"So we can stay together?" Clint placed a hand on Phil's belly.

"Yes, we can fight with them and clean up the mess afterwards," Phil guessed.

"I'd like that," he liked the Avengers and wished he could be part of them.

"You took a liking on them," Phil stated, he knew his husband too well.

"They are nice," he never had many friends and the Avengers radiate a sense of warmth he wasn't used to, something close to family.

Natasha was probably his first, real, best friend.

Phil was the first person he fell in love with unconditionally. They clicked together the moment they met.

Coulson respected him and treated him like he was someone, as if he was more than a sniper.

Therefore Clint respected Phil and the more he got to know the older man the more he realized how deep his affection ran.

"I'll fix it," Phil promised, he made it his business to take care of Clint a long time ago.

Clint chuckled. "I'm not a child, you can't simply fix the fact that the other kids don't want to play with me. They don't trust me, hell, I don't even trust myself."

"Good that we trust you, then." Phil squeezed Clint's hand.

Nick wouldn't have cleared him for duty otherwise.

"You should sleep."

"There are nicer ways to shut me up," Phil smirked.

"Like that?" Clint placed his lips on Phil's and kissed him slow, exploring his partner's mouth.

"Exactly like that," Phil breathed against Clint's lips.

"You need rest nonetheless."

"You too." Phil snuggled closer to Clint, at least as much as his wound let him.

"Goodnight love," Clint pecked him on the lips before he closed his eyes.

Phil stayed awake until he felt Clint relax against him, only then he permitted himself to sleep.

::::::::::::

Two months later Phil was cleared for field work.

He'd hoped Clint would be there when he had to face the Avengers for the first time but he was on a mission in China, near Harbin.

Phil felt sorry for his husband, Clint hated the cold and winters in Harbin could reach temperatures around -40 degree Celsius at night, -30 during the day.

Coulson stood in front of the meeting room and took a deep breath before he entered.

"Good morning gentlemen," he pretended nothing had happened. "I take over the role of S.H.I.E.L.D liaison, for all matters concerning the Avenger initiative," he put down a file.

The Avengers were staring at Phil with open mouths and wide eyes.

"Coulson?" Tony gasped.

"Correct." Phil opened the files, "Mr. Banner, care to explain how the green guy caused 1.253.566,90 Dollar worth of damage during my absence."

Bruce opened his mouth and closed it again.

"Well?" Phil's patience ran thin, a lecture or even violence would be more pleasant than the shocked silence.

"We thought you're dead," Tony yelled.

Finally, Phil thought. "Director Fury thought it was a good idea at that time and he deemed it best to keep my surviving a secret until I made a full recovery."

"How could you?" Tony wasn't listening, he didn't care. "We grieved, we buried you."

"That's not fair Phil," Steve shook his head. "It's not fair to show up here, after all those months."

"I know, but I had no choice," that was the truth.

"3 Months, Coulson," that was a very long time. "You could have told us after you were out of the woods or better," Tony was angry.

"I know. It wasn't my choice. I had my orders," he wanted to tell them but Nick wanted him to remain in the shadows.

After ten more minutes of yelling, lecturing and cursing they gave in and welcomed him back into their midst.

"I'm glad you're not dead", Steve stood up and pulled Phil into a hug.

He liked the man since the first time they met, after S.H.I.E.L.D defrosted him. Phil had been there, taking care of him, offering him his friendship.

His hero-worshipping was adorable and made Steve feel even more human.

Apropos human, Coulson was most probably the most human S.H.I.E.L.D agent he ever met.

"We should celebrate," Tony said. "Stark Tower 7 p.m."

"Well, that's settled. You still owe me an answer Mr. Banner," Phil returned to the main reason for the meeting. The hideous amount of destruction whenever the Avengers were involved.

::::::::::::

"Hey Miss Romanoff, nice to see you again," they hadn't seen her since their fallout with Barton.

She nodded, remaining by Phil's side, following him everywhere like a shadow.

"Pizza is in the living room, I hope James Bond is to your liking, or else you can choose a different movie," Tony rambled.

"Pizza and James Bond is fine, Mr. Stark," he missed his husband. Movie night without Clint was not the same.

Steve led them into the living room and offered Phil the best couch, Natasha sat down next to Phil, observing the room.

"We are not dangerous Miss Romanoff," Tony grinned.

"You are wrong Mr. Stark, you are indeed very dangerous, especially your tongue," she stated, tone cold as ice.

"Aw come on, still unforgiving?"

"I can hold grudges for a very long time," she replied, "something I have in common with my handler."

"Sounds like a sweetheart," Tony rolled his eyes.

"I'm a lot of things Mr. Stark but being a sweetheart isn't one of them," Phil understood how Tony got on Natasha's bad side.

Tony groaned, of course Coulson was her handler. The agent seemed to have a soft spot for freaks. Maybe they should rename the Avengers to Coulson's bunch of misfits.

"I never assumed you to be unforgiving," Steve was surprised.

"Depends on the circumstances." Phil liked them but their friendship left a bitter taste after what they have said to Clint, "I'm very unforgiving where my assets are concerned."

"I missed you Agent Agent," Tony mocked fondly.

"I'm displeased with the way you treated Agent Barton."

"We wanted more tests, he didn't," Tony shrugged. "He did nothing to gain our trust."

"Have you done something to earn his trust?" Clint would never agree to tests when he didn't trust the scientist in charge.

"We didn't bomb the Helicarrier, killing agents, and you," Tony looked at Steve for help.

"Stark is right, we can't be sure that Barton is Barton."

"You don't know him," Natasha narrowed her eyes. "You'd never know the difference."

"But you do?" Tony knew the moment he asked that it was a stupid question.

"Indeed," she leaned against Phil, resting her head on his shoulder. "He's like a brother."

Phil smiled fondly, "You have a lot to learn about us Mr. Stark. S.H.I.E.L.D isn't just an agency. Most teams stick together until the bitter end. No transfer or resignation," no one ever left S.H.I.E.L.D, at least not alive. Letting high ranking agents go was a great security risk, so they made themselves comfortable within the agency.

Family, friends,... they made it their home.

"So it's true," Pepper hurried into the living room. "I thought he was kidding," she flung herself at the poor Agent.

"Uhm, nice to see you, too. Miss Potts," Phil smiled, he liked the woman.

She punched his shoulder and wiped a few tears away. "That was mean, Phil, very mean."

"I know, Ms Potts and I'm truly sorry," he hated to see her shed tears because of him.

"Oh, I tried to find your cellist but I couldn't. Does she know that you're alive?" she cursed herself for failing.

Coulson's lovely cellist didn't attend the funeral and it made Pepper and the others angry to see that S.H.I.E.L.D gave a damn about their agents families.

"We are fine, Ms Potts. To be honest the cellist was aware of the fact that I was alive," he confessed.

"WHAT?" they said in unison.

"Nick isn't patient, bug him long enough and he will spill anything." Phil smirked, he had done it himself dozens of times.

"I have to say I'm glad, that she hadn't to endure all the grief," Pepper confessed, no woman should ever have to mourn her husband.

"The cellist was devastated enough after two days of believing that I was dead. I have to make up for it, big-time."

"A marriage, maybe. Children, a pretty house," Pepper wiggled her brows.

Natasha snorted, earning a glare from Pepper.

"Let us start the movie," Tony had enough of all the touchy-feely talk.

Halfway through the movie Phil hunched forward, gasping for air.

"Coulson?" Steve was up in an instant crouching next to the gasping agent.

Pepper looked at him with big worried eyes.

"Dead?" Natasha whispered reluctantly, her eyes held more emotions than they ever saw.

"No." Phil shook his head, he took a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart.

The Avengers fussed over him but Phil remained silent, ignoring their questions and worried glances.

His phone rang a few minutes later, "Don't um and err, spill it!"

They were surprised by Phil's tone of voice, the stoic agent never lost control before.

"Okay," he hung up, leaning closer to Natasha.

He whispered into her ear, it was obviously not meant for the Avengers.

She nodded and curled up against Coulson, staring at the TV without blinking or a hint of emotions.

Agent Coulson's expression mirrored Natasha's, Clint's op was compromised that was all he knew.

Nick promised to keep him updated.

"You okay?" Bruce asked gently.

"A mission went south and we probably lost an agent," Coulson stated matter of factly, Clint was hurt and scared he could feel it.

"My condolence," Bruce eyed Natasha, he had a crush on her and the sudden lack of emotions worried him. Her face was blank, almost lifeless.

"The agent is tough, survived all sorts of things." Phil tried to keep his emotions under control.

"For example?"

Phil groaned inwardly, Mr. Stark had to learn when to drop a topic. "Getting shot, stabbed, blown up, drowned."

"33 feet free fall, broken skull, getting hit by a car," Natasha added with a mocking undertone in her voice.

"More lives than a cat," Tony said impressed.

"Lucky bastard," they were surprised by Phil's choice of words.

"A friend of yours?" Steve asked empathic.

"He is very important." Coulson looked at the TV, hoping for distraction but the movie was boring.

"We should go," Natasha got up after a few minutes, she was restless. "I want to go home."

"You're right. See you tomorrow." Phil bid his goodbye, thankful for their decency not to ask any more questions.

It was probably Miss Potts murderous glare she directed at Tony that kept them silent.

Natasha accompanied Phil home, the older man needed her just as much as she needed him.

"Nick says he got lost after the mark blew up their hiding place. He knew they were coming after him," Phil was angry. "What if he's hurt badly? Or what if they captured him? Even if he got away," he looked at his pda, "-36 degree Celsius, Tasha. He will freeze to death!"

"We will find him, or he will find us. Let us wait for Nick to call before we act, okay?" she reasoned.

It was tempting to take the next plane over there but they had no clue where he was or where he could be, they needed more information and a plan.

"Let's go to bed, he needs us in top condition."

Phil took a shaky breath, he looked ready to cry but he wouldn't, not yet.

He could feel that Clint was alive and kicking, that was all he needed to know at the moment not to break down completely.

"Good night," he strolled into his and Clint's bedroom.

Natasha made herself comfortable on the spacious couch, waiting for the morning to come.

Clint's scent was breathtaking and sent a wave of pain through Phil's heart and soul.

The blanket, the pillow, the jumper on top of the comforter, all that smelled like Clint.

Phil fell asleep with tears on his face, Clint's jumper close to his chest and Clint's restless presence in his mind.

:::::::::::

"Any news about your friend?" Tony asked the next morning.

They gathered in a meeting room at Stark Tower to keep their distance from HQ and the helicarrier. The Avengers didn't trust Nick much.

"No," Phil could feel how close he was to lose his husband. It felt like someone caught his heart in a sling, pulling it tighter and tighter.

"Phil?" that was a bad omen, Fury leaving the Helicarrier, just to see him.

"Yes, sir?" the gentleness in Nick's voice freaked him out even more.

"He's officially MIA, if not KIA," the director seemed sad, whoever the missing agent was he meant a lot to the director, Phil and Romanoff.

"We can help," Steve offered.

"Give me his name and Jarvis will find him," Tony had confidence in his technology.

"We are capable of finding our own people Mr. Stark," Phil snapped irritated, it wasn't the time for Stark's all-knowing attitude. "No one finds him when he doesn't want to be found."

"No one's that good," Tony refused to believe him.

"We are spies Mr. Stark, we hide for a living," Coulson glared. "Who's his handler for this one?"

"Johnson, he should be back within the next 30 minutes," Nick looked at his watch.

"How comes that Johnson is fine and he's missing?" Phil clenched his fists, "and how comes that he was on an op with Johnson. They can't stand each other."

"He was the only handler available and he left to meet with an informant shortly before the mission went south."

"Is he a mole?" Natasha appeared behind Nick, voice dangerously controlled.

"Possibly," the older man couldn't deny that Johnson might had something to do with what happened.

"I want you to know that I'll punch the stuffing out of you, should he die out there," Phil threatened, standing dangerously close to Fury.

"Should that happen; I will accept the punishment," he would be damned if they lose the kid.

Steve touched Phil's shoulder from behind and the agent was so wired that he acted on his instincts.

With three well aimed hits he knocked Captain America on his ass.

The super soldier looked at him in astonishment.

They had clearly underestimated Coulson's capabilities.

"Wow," Tony grinned at Steve. "He's full of surprises."

"What happened to you?" Pepper stood in the doorway, coffee in hand.

"Coulson." Steve got up and returned to his seat, bringing as much space between them as possible.

"We will find him Phil," Nick vowed, hopefully alive. "We'll bring our boy home."

"I want the assignment," Phil demanded.

"You know the rules, your personally involved."

"And so are you," Phil countered.

"I'm not the one married to him," Nick replied sternly.

"But you're his friend, the closest thing he has to a brother," it was just a different kind of love.

"Wait, tell me if I got something wrong here. The missing agent is your husband? Not wife, or cellist, husband?" Tony's expression stated clearly that he was confused, surprised and pissed.

"That's correct," Fury answered for Phil. "He's palsy-walsy with him."

"That's why I couldn't find her," Pepper was disappointed, she though Phil was her friend "She's a he; you lied to me."

"Yes, a 5 foot 10, sassy blue eyed blond, build like a tank," Nick stated, Phil could hear the underlying fondness in his friends voice.

"We will help finding him if you want us to or not," Tony made up his mind. "Can we have a picture?"

"I wouldn't have guessed that you're homosexual, let alone you'd choose a man like him, build like a tank and sassy, I mean," Steve blurted out, it wasn't his intention to say it out loud.

"Why is that?"

"Because, I don't know. You're always in control, by the book, and your encounter with Loki proved that you're..."

"You're a bad-ass, that's why," Tony added for Cap.

Nick shook his head and opened the right file, a hologram appeared in the middle of the table.

Nick knew Tony kept an eye on S.H.I.E.L.D's server.

"Barton," Bruce's jaw dropped.

"Holy...," they heard Tony mutter.

"Specialist Clinton Francis Barton-Coulson, aka Hawkeye," Nick clarified. "S.H.I.E.L.D's top sniper, with us for 18 years. His missions are far beyond your security clearance, 8 or higher, or practically nonexistent. He was last seen 86 miles north-east of Harbin."

"I'll interrogate Johnson, bring him to Stark Tower," Phil called Hill.

"Phil." Nick warned but the agent just glared at him, "Nick, give me free rein to get the information we need."

Fury thought about it, he had the feeling that he would regret his choice, "Okay."

"Thank you," Phil's tone softened as he looked at the hologram of his husband.

He traced the lines of his face with his fingertips. What he touched was nothing more than thin air but it was kind of soothing nonetheless.

"He's scared," it was almost a whisper. "He's rarely truly scared."

"Is he hurt?" Nick needed to know.

"Yes, but I don't know how bad. He's well enough that the bond remains strong," the fear, sadness and pain that radiated through his body was pure agony.

"Bond?" Bruce asked the question the others had in mind.

"A mad scientist captured Barton and Coulson, a long time ago. He tried to connect brains with each other, telepathy, combining special talents and things like that. They barely survived the experiments. It didn't work, not the way he hoped. But something did change within them. They can feel each other. You know what people say about twins and sensing emotions...," Nick gave away as much as he could without breaking the rules completely. The op was a black spot in S.H.I.E.L.D's history.

"So you feel him, within your mind?" Tony frowned, that was interesting.

"It's more than that," Phil said, not explaining it further. It was their bond and he wouldn't share that with nosy scientists.

"He's here," Natasha had slipped out of the room to escort Johnson to the meeting room.

"Agent Coulson, nice to see you alive," Johnson smiled, one less lost soul.

"What happened?" Fury asked.

"I don't know I left to meet with an informant. I heard an explosion and hurried back to our hideout but there was nothing left, my men said he tried to save them."

"Did you search for him?" the director already knew the answer.

"There was nothing left," Johnson shrugged. "There is no way that he made it."

"He is alive we just have to figure out where he is."

Johnson's eyes widened slightly and Phil knew he sold his husband out, "You have a slim chance to save your skin, who else is involved?"

"He killed so many of us..., god punished him for his sins."

Phil pulled his gun before they could even blink, "Names."

Johnson shook his head.

Phil shot him in the knee, "No soccer with your kids anymore. Second chance."

Johnson gritted his teeth, giving his best not to break.

Coulson shot him in the shoulder, "No Baseball. Last chance."

Johnson's writhed in pain, "Alvarez, Schneider"

"We have to invest more time in their training. Seems the new generation breaks like glass." Nick spat, a real agent would never break after just two shots, of course it was positive for them this time but it was a bad thing out in the field.

"Widow," Phil nodded at Johnson.

She directed a little smirk at Phil, it was her version of a thank you, "Get up."

Johnson limped out of the room, hissing in pain at every move he made, "We did the right thing."

Natasha opened the door, falling a step behind Johnson.

"He's yours," she told the two guards in front of the meeting room before she took Johnson into a stranglehold to kick her knee into his spine, breaking it. "No sports with your kids at all," she whispered dangerously low. "Next time we meet, it will be your neck."

Fury informed Hill about Alvarez's and Schneider's involvement. "Let them live until we have what we need, that goes for Johnson, too. We need him a little longer," he told the guards before they dragged the disabled agent away.

"That wasn't an interrogation." Bruce shook his head, "it borders on an execution, destroying that man's life, planning on killing him"

"That's the way you guys handle problems?!" Tony was disappointed.

"Normally we torture them longer than that," Natasha seemed disturbingly satisfied with the homicide of humanity she just committed.

"Mr. Stark, Mr. Banner, what exactly do you think our agency does?" Nick quirked a brow "We do everything to reach our goal."

"Even crippling a family man?" Cap sounded sad.

"Yes," didn't mean Nick loved the way his agency was working but there were things that had to be done. Johnson would have spent the rest of his life in jail anyway, or in case Clint dies in deathrow, being disabled was a pretty meek punishment. He still had a chance to make it out alive, depending on Clint's testimony.

"Clint has a family, too." Phil looked at Cap, "he's loved, and would be sorely missed. Why is it okay to kill him?"

The Avengers remained silent, of course it wasn't okay to kill Barton and the raw emotions on their friends face made it even more clear that the archer was indeed loved and his death would break at least three hearts.

"I know what you told him, and you are wrong. It wasn't his fault. It was Loki's. Talking him into believing that he was a bloodthirsty murderer was not okay. I spent a long time convincing him to drop his self-loathing and then you guys come around telling him that he was a murderer, that he killed me and that he had no right to feel a hint of happiness... Did anyone ever tell you that you're a self-righteous bunch of hypocrites?"

Phil watched them think. "Mr. Banner, your green friend smashes buildings and throws cars, giving a damn about collateral damage. Mr. Stark in case you forgot, you produced weapons for a very long time. How many people got killed over the years, with the weapons you made? And Mr. Rogers you were a soldier, don't tell me your hands are free of blood. All these people had families, too."

Coulson stopped his lecture as he reached the desired effect.

The men were thinking about it and hopefully they would come to the conclusion that they were not better than S.H.I.E.L.D or anyone else.

"Do you have a plan, boss?" Phil returned his attention to the hologram.

"Traveling to China and turning around every stone until we find him"

"I like that." Coulson closed his eyes, something was not alright.

Their bond was fluttering and there was a strong hint of agitation.

"We should leave," Natasha read his posture.

"I want to come, too," Pepper broke her silence. She was shocked by the events but as much as it disturbed her, she had to acknowledge that it was in a sick way justified.

"No Ms Potts," Phil refused. "You're needed here."

"I want to help," she urged.

"You could do me a favor," Nick looked at her. "Please, book a room at the best hotel in town. Most expensive room you can get. From next week on, until... open end," depended on how long they needed to find Clint and how long he needed to get out of medical.

Under a week was not likely.

"Better than medical," Phil smiled sadly, Clint hated med bay.

Pepper pulled Phil into a hug. "He's fine," she rubbed soothing circles over the agent's back.

She had enough time to be angry at him after they found his husband.

"He needs us," Clint was a strong man but he needed his family. He was lost on his own.

Oh, he was able to survive and walk successfully through life but he would die mentally.

Barton needed people around him, people he could trust and rely on.

People who loved him.

:::::::::::::::

"That's for the men and women you killed," Johnson bound Clint's wrist to a chair with a rope.

"I was mind controlled," Clint argued, even though he knew it was pointless.

"You took my best friend away from me," Alvarez glared. "He had two kids, the third is on the way."

Clint's stomach churned, he felt guilty enough as it was.

"We are sorry but we will go home without you. Agent Barton." Johnson set the timer of the bomb.

They had overpowered him shortly before he intended to leave to take out the mark.

"Farewell Barton." Johnson left, Alvarez and Schneider waited for a few more minutes before they ran.

Clint looked around for a possibility to cut the rope.

The house was sparsely furnished, they had a table, four chairs, four cots, an unsteady cupboard and an old coal furnace.

He scuttled with his chair to the stove, the thing was blazing hot but he had no other choice.

Two deep breaths and then he pressed the rope against the stove, feeling it burn. Just like his skin but he had no other choice than clenching his teeth and trying not to scream.

He fumbled with the rope until he could rip it apart. High on adrenaline, he grabbed his gun and winter jacket before he jumped out the window.

Thirty seconds later the small building exploded.

That was close, Barton thought while he struggled to get up and find a hiding place.

He tried to get his jacket on in the meanwhile. Pulling the sleeves over his arms was pure agony but he had no choice. Jacket or freeze.

Clint decided to hide on the roof of a nearby building, he could see how Alvarez and Schneider rubbed ash and soot on their clothes and skin.

They were talking about something but he couldn't hear them or read their lips but his gut told him that their intentions were less likely in his favor.

Both men left, what irritated Clint a little because they normally waited for help close by especially without a meeting point.

They had a solid cover story and the explosion could be rated easily as accident.

One business man didn't make it out in time as the stove set something on fire and the gas canister for the generator blew up.

He could come up with five more cover stories but his teammates had clearly different plans.

Clint waited for the clean-up crew but ten armed men arrived before them. "That has upset my plan," he talked to himself. "Damn."

Clint left the building as fast as he could, one of the guys had a heat sensor and was pointing at the building Clint occupied.

He should have known that there was a meeting point somewhere and they would call the mark and sell him out, dead or not.

No one would question them as long as the mark knew about the plan and they could put all the blame for Clint's death on him.

"Damn, it's cold," he was lucky that he already wore most of his winter clothes before they bound him to the chair but it was not enough to keep away the freezing cold that seemed to seep through the fabric of his clothes.

He could barely feel his fingers anymore and his face burned like fire.

Clint couldn't go on like this, he needed a pause, "Come on, come on, come on."

He looked around but there was nothing but snow and ice.

After one more strenuous mile Clint found a frozen stone formation and fell down on his knees in front of it. "Better than nothing," he muttered, crawling between two rocks.

The rocks provided a little shelter from the wind and hopefully they kept him hidden for a while.

He wasn't sure how much space lay between him and his pursuers, but it should be enough to get some rest.

At least that was what he hoped for.

Clint closed his eyes for a painful moment, his wrists burned and so did his shoulder, where a piece of glass had embedded itself in his flesh.

At least he hoped it was just a tiny shard of glass.

"Calm down," he told himself. "Phil," Clint tried to feel his husband.

There he was behind all the adrenalin, pain and numbness.

The sadness Phil felt broke his heart, his husband was a wreck and he didn't need their bond to know that.

Coulson loved his Hawk unconditionally, no matter what he did, said or was accused of.

Clint fell asleep for a short time, his blood pressure dropped and he had to fight hard to open his eyes.

The sheer panic that radiated through the bond helped him with the task.

He had to stay awake for Phil, he had to stay alive for Phil, he had to find a way home.

The older agent was freaking out because of his little nap and there was nothing Clint could do to make it better but coming home.

Clint checked his weapon with shaky hands. "They're coming," he mumbled.

It helped to talk, even when nobody but him was listening.

He didn't understand the language but he was sure that they found his trace, Clint peeked around the corner and saw the guy with the heat sensor.

"Two shots," he aimed and fired two times.

The heat sensor was destroyed and the guy dead, but with that he gave away his position.

"One, two, three," he got up and ran.

He was low on ammo and couldn't risk to waste what little he had.

::::::::::::::

"The Quinjet is ready," Tony informed.

"Thank you Mr. Stark," Phil said absentmindedly.

"Phil?" Natasha put a hand on his shoulder.

The agent closed his eyes, listening to his emotions.

A wave of love rushed through his body and he knew it was Clint's way to reassure him.

To tell him that it would be okay and that Phil shouldn't be sad, because they would be alright.

The problem was that Phil knew that it wasn't true.

Clint wasn't fine, he wasn't in safety and Phil wouldn't stop being sad until the archer was back where he belonged.

He sent back his love with a hint of longing, telling Clint that he would find him.

Nothing could keep them apart.

"Phil," Natasha squeezed his shoulder.

"He tries to make me feel better," a gentle smile graced his lips, combined with the sadness in his eyes they could see how much the archer meant to the agent.

"We will find him," Steve promised.

Coulson gave him a slow nod.

"He must be desperate," Natasha linked her arm with Phil's.

The archer felt the need to take some time to calm Phil down, that wasn't a good sign.

"He always makes sure I feel better," Phil chuckled sadly. "He never succeeded, not even once."

"Sounds like he loves you very much." Bruce glanced at Natasha.

"He does," the agent pulled out a necklace from under his shirt, a wedding band was dangling from the silver chain. "He's a lonely soul. Every single person he ever loved abandoned him. We needed a long time to gain his trust, to prove him that we would never leave him... He told me that he'd like to get to know you guys. I don't know why but he took a liking on you and that is rare. That made what you did even more painful. He thought he could be an Avenger, he thought he could be your friend but he isn't good at making friends. He's skilled, twisting people around his finger is a piece of cake for him but his personal life is something entirely else."

"He spends most of his time in the air vent, or in Phil's office," Natasha gave up following him up there a long time ago. She didn't like it there, "He feels unwell between too many people, he likes to be around people he knows, and values but strangers... no."

"Did we cause a lot of damage?" Bruce bit on his bottom lip.

"He thought he couldn't remain my asset without being an Avenger, that scared the hell out of him, we are a team for a very, very long time. The strange thing is that he took a liking on you guys after such a short time. You made an impression on him." Phil smiled lost in thoughts, "He described you as nice, and nice is worth a damn lot. It's comparable with trustworthy in his book. Sadly you guys dampened his hope to be your friend. You reminded him of what a wayward goof-off he is."

"We might have overreacted", Tony stated reluctantly, "a little, okay a lot," he corrected after Natasha gave him a glare that clearly said you're-so-dead.

"We have to hurry," tears sprang into Phil's eyes. "Tasha."

"We start in three minutes," Tony informed.

"What happened Phil?" Natasha tried to keep calm but it wasn't easy.

"He's weak," Coulson swallowed hard. "I think the cold is getting to him. Slowing him down."

"Stark, Barton is freezing to death we have to start now," Natasha yelled her order.

Tony looked at his passengers for a moment before he skipped a few safety protocols, "We're on our way."

Phil closed his eyes concentrating on Clint, "Keep fighting, god, fight."

:::::::::::::

Clint stumbled and fell face first into the snow.

He breathed hard while he tried to get a grip on himself.

They were close and there was no place to hide in sight "Phil"

The archer squeezed his eyes shut, thinking hard but the cold made it difficult to think straight.

He held his breath for a moment, his own breath was too loud in his ears and drowned out the noises around him.

They were coming for him.

Clint got on his knees, looking for a way out, there was a pit.

At least he hoped it was one, it was dark and hard to see, even with his great eye-sight.

He got up and ran in different directions before he took cover in the pit.

To his luck the snow was still fluffy enough in a few places that he could bury himself under the snow. His clothes were white, unfortunately stained with ash and soot and blood but it shouldn't be a problem at night, and with a lot of luck the snow hid him good enough should the flashlight beams hit him.

He wasn't too sure his plan would work but he needed the hope.

Nine men combed the district for him, the footprints were confusing and they took their time with the area, unsure where to go next.

One man stood very close to Clint's hiding place.

The archer could see his legs and the gun he held. He was shouting something and Clint tensed.

A tall guy shouted something back and pointed the flashlight in their direction.

A second guy appeared close by, he couldn't see him but he heard him. The crunching sound when his heavy boots made contact with the frozen, and fluffier, snow.

Panic rose in his chest but he forced himself to keep calm.

One wrong move, one sound and he would be dead.

It took all the will-power he had not to shiver, and he wanted nothing more than to shiver violently.

Keeping his teeth from shattering was almost more difficult than keeping the rest of his body still, piss off already.

He had to wait a few more minutes before they decided on a path and he had to wait a little longer after they left to make sure they had left for good.

The archer used the time he had to remind Phil of how much he loved him, because he wasn't sure that surviving this one was an option.

Getting up hurt terribly, his muscles ached and he felt unfocused.

"Going back," he whispered, shivering violently. "Have to go back."

Clint decided to take the way back he came from.

::::::::::

Phil kneeled next to the debris of the small building they had occupied.

His hand ran lovingly over the bow he found between all the rubble.

The bow was a present for Clint, for their sixth anniversary and the archer loved the bow.

He refused to get a new one, always demanding that this was his bow and if they had something better they had to upgrade the one he already had.

Phil wasn't sure they could simply repair the bow this time.

Burn marks, scratches, broken electronic, torn string, fissures.

"Did you find something?" Steve had rummaged through the rubble.

Coulson held up the bow, it was hard to keep the tears at bay, "He'd never leave it behind on his own free will."

Natasha appeared next to him, touching the bow very gently. "We have to get him a new one."

Bruce watched her from afar, the bond between her and Barton was deep and irritating.

He wondered what they had to endure that bound them so deeply together.

"Did you find traces?" Phil never took his eyes off the bow.

"They lead into the woods," she pointed at a bleak landscape.

"Let's move then." Phil put on his night vision goggles.

Tony waited at the Quinjet, ready to head out any moment.

It was too cold for the armor so he volunteered to play chauffeur.

"The bond wavers, I can't feel much anymore but ... determination," Phil felt relieved thanks to the knowledge that his husband kept on fighting even though he was tuckered out.

"He's strong." Steve admired strength, not bodily strength but the strength of mind and character.

"His life wasn't a cake walk, he had to be strong," Phil observed the area.

"Wasn't?" the kid wasn't dead, not yet, hopefully never and being with S.H.I.E.L.D could never be easy.

"I take care of him," Phil stated, matter of fact. "He just has to be strong during the job, but never at home."

"Sounds like he's a dog," Bruce huffed.

"Maybe you'll get to know him one day, and then you'll understand what I mean." Phil hated Clint's insecurity and what he hated most were the reminders of his upbringing.

"Phil," Natasha urged. "We found a dead enemy."

Coulson ran over to her and examined the dead body.

Bullet wound between the eyes, it was not possible to say how long the guy was dead due to the freezing climate.

Phil looked around, searching for footprints. "That way," he spied the rock formation.

There was blood on the ice and Phil knew it was Clint's.

"Come." Steve grabbed the agent's arm and led him away, "Can you feel him?"

Phil nodded.

"See, he's fine then," Cap led them further into the darkness, dawn was approaching but the hints of light weren't helping.

::::::::::::::

Clint stopped in his tracks, there were people close by.

He cursed inwardly. "No," it was spoken so soft and with despair that it sounded pitiful even in his own ears.

It couldn't be, he fought so hard, he got rid of the damn mark and his men just to run into their backup crew.

The thought that it might be his own backup crew never occurred to him.

Clint made out a broad tree and hid behind it watching the people.

Two tall, broad men, one slightly shorter and a woman.

One man stopped and placed a hand above his own heart. "Tasha," the man whispered and the woman focused all her attention on the man.

Phil frowned the wave of despair was suddenly replaced by relief, "Clint?" he called out.

To hell with keeping a low profile and not alarm the enemy.

He had Captain America and Hulk on his side after all.

"Coulson?" Steve asked surprised, looking around for a trace of Barton nonetheless.

"What took you so long, sir," a soft voice appeared next to him. "Thought you got lost."

"Clint," Phil took in the scene in front of him.

The archer was pale, his lips blue and he was shaking like an aspen leaf during a storm.

A smile of relief appeared on the archer's lips before his legs gave out.

Phil caught him before he hit the ground. "I'm here," he rubbed his cheek against the top of Clint's head, "I'm here."

Steve informed Tony on sent him their coordinates, it didn't take Stark long to pick them up.

They covered the ground with blankets before they laid Clint on them.

"I have to take off your clothes," Phil opened the wet jacket."Can you help me a little?"

Clint tried to stay awake and as focused as possible. "Yeah," he muttered.

Cap helped Clint to sit up for a moment, it was clear that the archer was in no condition to help at all.

Phil got rid of the jacket, jumper and thermal-shirt. "Now your pants," he informed, Clint hated it to show more of his body than necessary.

It made him feel vulnerable.

While Coulson continued to undress his husband, Cap used the time to examine the archer's wounds more closely.

Something stuck in his left shoulder, the wound was red and seemed infected.

There were burn marks on his lower arms, large enough to hurt like hell.

Cap had his share of burns during the war to know how painful burns could be.

Luckily the archer showed no signs of severe frostbites.

"More blankets, okay?" Phil spoke to Clint like he would with a child.

The archer nodded.

Tony provided them with a huge amount of comfy blankets.

Phil shrugged off his jacket and got rid of the dress shirt, "Come here."

He pulled Clint into his arms before he wrapped them into four layers of blankets.

The older agent looked disheveled just dressed in an under shirt and hair sticking at odd angles.

Tony filed the thought, to make fun of them, away for the moment, he could do that when they were fine.

"You have to stay awake," Phil reminded his husband, shivering at the cold that radiated from Clint's body. "You have no right to die," he placed a loving but firm kiss against Clint's temple.

"'kay," the archer agreed, snuggling closer into Phil's embrace. "Thought I'd die," he sighed, absorbing Phil's warmth and love.

Phil's resolve broke and Clint could feel the tremors in his lover's body.

The archer shifted a little to look at his husband and what he saw took him by surprise.

His controlled and stoic husband was crying, in front of the Avengers and Natasha.

He normally tried to be strong in front of his men for the sake of their moral and Clint suspected it had something to do with shame, too.

Phil was a private person and letting people see what he felt was much more than he was comfortable with.

"Don't cry," Clint begged, he hated nothing more than seeing his husband cry, okay seeing him hurt was worse but not by much.

Phil buried his face in the crook of Clint's neck and tightened his hold on the archer.

"I'm here." Clint could feel the tears in his own eyes. "I'm here," he was ready to cry any moment and Captain America of all people put a fifth blanket around them, wiping one of Clint's traitorous tears a away with his thumb before he joined Tony in the cockpit.

The look on the super soldier's face was so soft that it startled Clint, especially after their last encounter.

"I wasn't here, they left you to die and I wasn't here," Phil took a shaky breath.

"How often do I have to tell you that it wasn't your fault?" they had the discussion every time Clint got hurt while under the command of different handlers.

The discussions they had when Clint got hurt during Phil's operations were by far worse.

"Just as often as I have to tell you that it wasn't your fault whenever I get hurt," the archer wasn't better than him.

"Often then," Clint tried to sound amused.

Phil kissed Clint's neck, "I love you. God, I love you."

"I know. I'm sorry for scaring you so much," he felt the love Phil held for him, it was a great feeling.

"Not your fault," the older agent rested his chin on Clint's shoulder, pressing him closer to his chest. "It must have been hell for you."

"I don't want to see snow anytime soon," his half-joke ended with a coughing fit, it sent a wave of pain through his body but this time it was okay.

Phil was with him.

"Stark how long?" Phil yelled, the heater was running on full force and they were wrapped up in endless blankets but Clint's condition seemed to get worse.

He was shivering less and his skin wasn't white like the snow anymore but flushed instead.

Phil was sure his body was fighting against an infection, and possibly against pneumonia, too.

"Two hours." Stark knew it was a long time but they couldn't stop at a hospital outside of S.H.I.E.L.D's official jurisdiction.

God knew who was lurking in the shadows to get their dirty hands on them.

"Hold on, okay?" Phil tried to control the panic that bubbled in his chest but Clint felt it nonetheless.

"Kiss." Clint wanted one so desperately.

Phil's features softened. "Gladly," he captured Clint's cold and raw lips, exploring his mouth like it was the first time.

The archer enjoyed Phil's warm lips against his own, his husband took his time to prove his love and that made Clint feel even more cherished.

The archer relaxed and unlocked his emotions, everything he felt traveled to Phil.

The older agent gasped against his lover's lips, the force of emotions was overwhelming.

He could feel, that his husband was scared, but mostly relieved to be back in his lover's arms.

He could feel how much his hawk loved him, how thankful Clint was for having him.

Normally they avoided to send all their emotions, they needed a long time to control their feelings enough not to overpower the other with them but this time Phil took the force of love gladly.

It was almost physically painful but worth it.

Phil took a deep breath before he let go of his own guarded emotions.

The warm feeling of love and belonging that bound them conjured a fond smile on Clint's lips. He could swear the bond was visible between them, beautiful warm colored lights dancing around them.

The soothing humming of the bond lulled him to sleep, not even Phil's fear could wake him this time.

:::::::::::::

They got Clint to medical sooner than they'd thought.

The Helicarrier was on its way to meet them halfway, Nick listened to Stark's incoming call Maria had accepted.

She wished them luck but Fury had other plans, he ordered her to get the Helicarrier in the air and head for the Quinjet.

She wasn't happy about his orders but obeyed. She had no choice after all, and when she was honest Barton was worth the risk.

"How is he?" Fury strolled into the room, giving his best not to look agitated.

"He will be fine," Natasha whispered.

Phil lay on the bed together with Clint, out cold.

"Have you taken a picture?" the director asked.

"Of course," she smiled, they made it a habit to collect pictures of memorable events.

No matter what as long as it was cute or a good thing.

They had a big photo album stored away in Nick's office, sometimes they asked for copies of particular photos to take them home.

"Pneumonia?" Nick listened to Clint's labored breathing.

Nat shook her head. "Moderate case of Influenza and an infection but the meds are helping." she pointed at a IV-line.

It had been indeed glass in Clint's shoulder, and it took the doctors a while to get it out.

Luckily it didn't cause much damage, at least from the point of view of an archer.

Nothing what time and physical therapy couldn't cure.

The burns were more severe and would need a long time to heal, the scars would never vanish but that was okay were Phil was concerned.

The archer was still beautiful.

"Kid, you'll be the death of me," Nick let out a long suffering breath. "Call me should his condition change," he learned that you could never be sure, no matter what the doctors say.

Natasha nodded. "Can you give Rogers a call and tell him to come over?" he was waiting to see the archer for hours.

Fury nodded his okay before he returned to his duties.

::::::::::

"Hey." Steve peeked into the room, both agents were still asleep while agent Romanoff held vigil.

"Come in," she pointed at a chair next to her.

"Thank you," he knew she gave permission to see them or else he wouldn't have gotten permission to enter medical.

"Don't make me regret it," she warned.

Steve nodded in agreement. "Director Fury told me he will be fine," he eyed the two men on the bed.

A gentle smile lit up the soldier's face, they looked adorable together.

"Clint is too stubborn to give in," she said fondly. "Phil worries me more at the moment."

"Why is that?"

"He made it his business to care for Clint," she watched her sleeping family, "problems, worries, wishes, needs. Phil takes care of it all."

"Why?" the archer was a grown man and agent, he should be able to take care of these things without babysitter.

"It's not on me to tell you," she cursed herself for letting these details slip, "but I can tell you that Clint is a man who gives everything for others, not thinking of himself."

"Sounds like a good man." Steve wondered how much of it was true, she was Barton's friend and would say anything for his benefit.

"You have no idea," Nat considered to tell the Captain something about herself. "Coulson sent him to kill me, he didn't and almost lost everything in the process."

"Kill you?" he looked from Natasha to Barton.

"I worked for a different agency, they had every right to assassinate me. But Barton saw something in me that made him change his mind. No matter what people say, he does have his own mind and does not follow orders blindly. Not even Phil's," she remembered the expression on his face the first time they met. There was pity and something close to understanding. That was probably the main reason she agreed to change sides, the knowledge that he understood what it meant to have a shitty life.

The only condition she asked for was to work with him.

S.H.I.E.L.D agreed after Barton pled her case and she suspected that Coulson had his hands in it too.

Her main goal in life since then was it to keep them safe and not disappoint them.

She'd rather shoot herself than betray their trust.

"There are many rumors concerning the infamous Hawkeye." Steve heard them all and they didn't fit the impression he had from the archer.

"Tell me and I tell you the truth," she offered, Clint wanted their friendship? that could be arranged.

"He's hard to handle."

"Respect him and he will respect you," many handlers used them like tools and weren't worth their loyalty. The handlers with enough respect for their assets earned the privilege to deserve their protection.

"He never visited a school."

"He dropped out early but he is very intelligent. He can see things we can't, the Tesseract for example. Our scientists wrecked their brains why that thing was glowing, he looked at it, and told them that someone probably tried to open the gate from the other side," the scientists still hushed it up but the other agents spread the news.

"He is a gigolo."

"He is faithful, as far as I know Clint had two people in his life. A woman when he was a youth and Phil. He loves Coulson unconditionally, he would never use him but I know that people tend to think that. Especially because Phil is so devoted to him. They think he's just too blind to see the truth, that Clint is using him all along but I can tell with certainty that is not the case," she hated these people, dragging their relationship trough the dirt because they were too narrow minded to understand.

Steve thought about the rumors, he already had the answer to the question if Barton hated people or if he really was emotionless, "He scares junior agents."

"That's true," she wasn't free of guilt either. It was their hobby to scare the hell out of these kids, "but it's more like a spare time job, and I'm involved too, and Phil, and Nick, Jasper and Maria"

Cap chuckled, who could deny them some fun? "He killed his brother," the amusement died.

"Who told you that?" the person was as good as dead.

"So it's true?" it was a riddle to him how a person was able to slay his own kin.

"His brother tried to kill him. It was self-defense," her expression saddened.

He believed her, "Why?"

"Clint was better than him. Nothing more. Jealousy made him do what he did," Clint had been devastated. They needed a week in a comfy hotel to help him cope with his brothers death before he was even able to leave the bed, or air ducts on occasions.

A pang of protectiveness hit him like a sledgehammer. The archer looked so frail on the hospital bed, vulnerable and young, "No one deserves that."

Coulson looked even in his sleep like he protected Barton from the world around him, the way his arms were wrapped around the archer, the way his head rested on his shoulder and the expression on the agents face. Relaxed but attentive.

Natasha knew he meant Barney's betrayal, "Believe me, Captain. That was just the tip of the iceberg."

Anger seeped into the feeling of protectiveness, what happened to the kid when almost being killed by his own brother was just the tip of the iceberg?

He began to understand why Coulson, Romanoff and even Fury were trying so hard to protect him from harm. "Keep me updated," Cap got up and placed a card and a piece of paper on Clint's bedside table before he left.

Natasha looked at the card, it was a key card for Stark tower. Floor 22, Hawkeye's apartment.

:::::::::::::::

After a long discussion with Tony and Fury, Phil decided to give in.

Stark decided that no hotel was worthy for Barton so he took it upon himself to furnish an apartment for Clint, and Agent.

"It's more awesome than a hotel could ever be and you get it for free," the billionaire had told Fury and the director agreed.

Nick was sure it would help building a friendship between Clint and the Avengers, and they wouldn't have to spend Christmas alone again. To be honest they tended to skip the holidays, burying themselves in work. Exchanging little gifts between friends, somewhere in a war zone or on board of the hellicarrier.

"Why are we here again?" Clint clung to Phil's hand, he wanted to go home.

"Because Nick wants to do us a favor and Tony bribed him with a gratis alternative," Phil deadpanned.

"That's a bad idea," the archer let go of Phil's hand and put up his Agent Barton expression.

"We will see," Phil schooled his features. "Don't worry so much," he placed a hand on the small of his husbands back and lead him out of the elevator.

"Hey," Tony bounced into the hall. "Let me show you around."

"Nice to see you, too, Mr. Stark," Phil rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah," Tony waved. "Follow me."

The apartment was huge, 200 m² just for them.

Tony bought them a king sized bed, whirlpool in addition to the large shower stall, the living room was well equipped.

Huge 3D TV, high-end sound system, two comfy sofas, two armchairs, large table, shelves and paints.

An office for Coulson, with high-end computer, big flat screen monitor, shelves, safe and radio. The office chair was solid and looked very comfy.

The furniture wasn't too modern but not old fashioned either, there was a nice balance.

Clint dared to say it was classy.

They had a spacious kitchen, too but Tony told them that they normally shared the kitchen on the communal floor and he hoped they would join them once in a while.

The kitchen in each apartment was more for drinking coffee in the morning and eating cereals than eating dinner alone.

"Thank you Mr. Stark, the apartment is incredible," Phil thanked. "You shouldn't have."

"We Avengers should live close by," Tony shrugged, he found out that the Coulson-Barton family owned a little apartment on the other side of town and a bunk for couples on the Helicarrier.

"We have a home," Clint stated, keeping the surprise out of his voice.

"Think about it," Tony winked before he left.

"Beautiful isn't it?" Phil put his arms around his archer after they heard the front door close.

"Awesome," but it felt wrong to be there, it was expensive and far out of their league.

The older agent placed a hand above Clint's heart, "What's going on in there?"

"I don't understand why."

"I think you're officially an Avenger," he was proud to be the husband of a hero.

"What if I don't want to be one?" Phil's pride made him feel bad.

"You are my agent," it was a fact and nothing would ever change that.

"Your agent, hmm." Clint nuzzled Phil's neck, "just an agent?"

"Awesome and very talented specialist." Phil smiled, sucking in air as Clint bit down on a sensitive point on his neck, "Bedroom, now."

"Is that an order, sir?" Clint pulled on Phil's belt loop, bringing them closer together.

"It is, court martial by disobeying, you tease."

Clint laughed and pecked Phil on the lip before he dragged him to the bedroom.

::::::::::::

After three days Phil ordered Clint to join their shared dinner.

Phil himself was at HQ and made sure Jarvis kept an eye on the archer, reminding him of his appointment with the others.

"You're early," Bruce smiled at the archer. "Dinner isn't ready."

"Jarvis demanded that I join you now."

"Because Mr. Banner could use some help. Agent Coulson told me cooking dinner is your duty in your marriage."

"It's not my duty," Clint tried not to blush. "He has a bigger workload."

"You can cook?" the scientist's smile widened. "You can help me, cut the paprika please."

Clint nodded and did as he was told.

"What do you like to cook?" Bruce couldn't stand the silence.

The archer shrugged, "Stew, stir-fry, casserole."

"Sounds delicious. Do you mind to cook for us sometimes?"

"Why?"

"Tony can't cook even when his life depended on it. Cap cooks the way they cooked 100 years ago, delicious but bland in the long run. So I'm stuck with the task, I or the delivery service," Bruce sounded everything but excited.

"Okay." Clint didn't look at Bruce and continued his task, "I can help you with Nat, if you want," he offered out of the blue.

"I don't know what you mean."

Clint gave Bruce his best agent Barton smirk, mocking and calculating, "I know you like her and I know that she likes you. The problem is she's not good with people, trusting you enough to let you close is hard for her. She went through a lot over the years. Talk to her, engage her into a conversation. Even about science if it helps you."

"Why are you doing this?" Bruce blushed.

"Because I love her," he stated, matter of fact. "She deserves happiness and I think you will make her happy."

"That's a lot of trust you put in me," Bruce felt honored.

"I watched you, I listened to everything she told me about you and I read Phil's files. I think I can trust you with her safety." Natasha needed someone to love, someone who loved her in return.

Bruce bumped his shoulder against Clint's, it was his silent way to thank the archer and offer his companionship.

:::::::::::::::

Clint helped Bruce cook the following two weeks, they had developed a daily routine.

Cook, talk, eat, becoming friends.

It seemed so simple at times to love the freaky bunch of heroes.

Of course nothing was ever easy and that applied to his friends, too.

The day had been crappy for Clint, it was his first day in the field after his injury, and he wasn't used to Cap's voice in his ear.

Phil had been there, too, but he wasn't in charge of the Avengers.

The older agent commanded the S.H.I.E.L.D agents, holding contact with Cap to coordinate their next moves but Clint wasn't part of it.

"That was a lousy performance," Steve stomped into the dining room, after they finished their dinner in silence. "You have to listen to me."

"I'm sorry, sir," Clint tried to hide behind his nonchalant behavior.

"You are sorry?" Steve stepped closer. "You could have gotten killed," he raised an arm to gesticulate.

Clint misjudged Steve's intention and jerked, ducking a little.

Steve's eyes went wide and he lowered his arm slowly, "Clint?"

Tony had dropped the pen he held while Bruce's skin changed from skin colored to green and back.

"I was angry because I worry about you." Steve's tone softened, "and I will never hurt you. It wasn't my intention to hit you just now. I was just gesticulating in frustration."

"I was unfocused and your sudden movement startled me," Clint straightened his back.

It was obviously a lie. "No, kid. I know how abused children react," Tony said unusual gentle. "I know we don't know each other much but could you tell us why?"

Clint studied them, they seemed honestly concerned, "My dad was a violent drunk. Killed himself and my mom while driving drunk when I was 5. Got hit a lot in the orphanage, too, from nuns and kids alike. I lived in a circus for a few years. They taught me how to be the best. They left me to die, even my brother. I ended up in jail, wasn't funny."

The story was short and censored but it was enough to make them understand why he was so cautious and kept people at distance.

Captain America did something that startled Clint to the core, the old soldier pulled him into a hug.

It was gentle and warm, not dangerous at all. "Don't worry, son. We protect our own," he rubbed over Clint's back and released him.

The hug was short but honest. "Thank you, ol' man," Clint's agent mask dropped a little and they could see the insecure young man behind the mask.

Bruce was sure Barton had never been a child.

Bodily, yes of course, but mentally, no, not for long.

"Could we change the topic? I don't feel so good right now," Clint gave them a curt smile before he took a deep breath.

He told them more than he ever intended to but it felt good and right.

Clint just hoped he wouldn't regret it. Wouldn't be the first time that people he trusted betrayed him.

"Movie night," Tony announced. "Clint chooses the movie, we wash the dishes."

"I help Clint," Steve put an arm around the archer's shoulder and led him to the living room "Last time he decided to do the dishes he modified the dishwasher. Of course it exploded. So it's safer for me to stay away. Faaaar away," Steve explained in a conspiratorial tone.

"Does he do that often?" Clint smiled, he came to the conclusion that all of them had a screw loose.

"Well," Cap hesitated, "every other day."

"You have a crush on him," the archer realized. "Does he know?"

"We are together, sort of," Steve blushed furiously. "Two months."

"I think you're a perfect match," that was the truth.

"I hope so," Rogers laughed. "I really love him but I think you know the concept of love."

"I do." Coulson was perfect in his eyes, "We confessed our love while I was bleeding out from a stab wound to the neck," he let his finger trace over a scare between neck and collarbone. "The mark missed my carotid by an inch. We liked each other a lot but the unresolved tension and the secrets between us made it difficult. We both tried to keep our attraction a secret because we feared the rejection, losing what little we had was a scary thought but that was what kept us apart. After the experiment, we drifted apart even more. It was uncomfortable to have someone within your mind, feeling everything you feel, and vice versa. Phil didn't take it well and neither did I. Do you know why we confessed our love?"

Steve shook his head, the story tore on his heart but the outcome was more than positive, they were alive and still very much in love.

"Because we thought I was dying. We didn't consider the possibility that I make it out alive." Phil had been scared beyond belief. It was the first and last time Clint had seen resignation in his handler's eyes.

"But you didn't." Steve was glad, you couldn't miss what you never got to know but it would have been a shame if Barton had died. Human life is precious.

"No I didn't. He calls me lucky bastard behind my back," it wasn't really behind Clint's back, Coulson had hissed it in his earpiece at more than one occasion.

"Maybe," Steve grinned knowingly.

"Ahaaa," Clint grinned back.

::::::::::::::

"I'm glad you made friends with them," Phil kissed Clint's neck, they made a huge progress during the past weeks. "You got me worried for a while."

"They care for me," Clint was almost sure.

"They do." Phil was sure, "I love you, Clint"

"Love you, too," the archer said confused, something was wrong with his husband.

He could feel it, agitation and a hint of fear.

"Come." Phil took Clint's hand, he had convinced Clint to join the team for a glass of eggnog and cookies.

They entered their shared living room and the blinding smile he had directed at Phil a moment ago died.

The Avengers had never seen such a breathtaking smile on the archer's face. It made him look ten years younger.

Seeing it die down let their hearts skip a beat.

"Merry Christmas," Natasha kissed Clint on the cheek.

"Merry Christmas," Clint directed at everyone.

"Take a seat," Tony said cheerful and Pepper thrust a glass into Clint's hand. "Come."

Clint obeyed, sending Phil a dangerous look. He hated it when his husband lied.

That wasn't a meeting for a drink or two, it was a real Christmas party.

"He's angry with me," Phil watched his lover turn his back on him. "I hope it goes as planned or I'm divorced by tomorrow morning."

"Don't worry, he loves you too much," Steve patted Phil on the back.

They loved Christmas, it was the time to reconnect with friends and family.

It was the time to celebrate their new found relationship. The Avenger initiative became, for every member, a synonym for safety, friendship and family.

If they wanted to or not.

Coulson told them that Clint wasn't used to spend holidays at home.

He was used to war zones, jungles, deserts and hospitals, not to mention the loveless festivities during his childhood.

Clint's fellow teammates decided that spending Christmas without a loving family was inexcusable.

They all lacked the happy family life after they grew up but Clint never got a chance to experience it at all and that was something they intended to change.

It was time to start a new Christmas tradition, for everyone's sake.

"I hope you're right," Phil sighed deeply before he joined Clint on the couch.

Coulson could feel Clint's anger and disappointment, "Clint, I'm sorry."

Clint gave Phil a long and hard look, he knew his husband meant well but he hated surprises.

The fear inside Phil intensified. "It's okay," Clint said finally.

The older agent took Clint's hand. "We mean well," all of them.

"I know," deep down he knew that even Tony Stark had a heart of gold.

They made an exception for their Christmas dinner and ate in the living room.

Tony served not more than necessary, he remembered that Clint was an orphan and he feared that a too opulent variation of dishes could make him uncomfortable.

So he decided to keep it simple, only the classics.

"That's good," Steve dug into his roast and potatoes.

"I know, Silvia is the best," she was Tony's maid and awesome behind the stove. He got her a first class ticket to Hawaii and two weeks in a 5 star hotel as a thank you. For the entire family of course.

Clint watched them during the dinner, without saying a word. He just sat on the couch and ate.

They made jokes and offered ways for Clint to join in but he refused to take the bait.

"How do you like the apartment?" Pepper forced a smile on her face.

"It's beautiful," the smile didn't reach Phil's eyes and it felt wrong.

Coulson was someone who communicated through his eyes.

Normally, you wouldn't find amusement, anger, happiness or fear on his face but in his eyes.

His eyes were twinkling whenever he was in a good mood or tried not to laugh about a joke or stupid comment; and his eyes were shooting daggers at whoever crossed his path when he was in a sour mood.

"Stop giving him the silent treatment," she chided. "Can't you see that he's sad?"

Clint's stomach churned, of course he could see it, he could feel it.

"Pepper, let it go." Phil knew that Clint wasn't hurting him because he wanted to, no he was hurting him accidentally.

The 'agent' act and lack of communication was part of his internal defense mechanism.

"Excuse me for a moment," Clint got up and headed for the bathroom.

"Clint," Phil called after him. "Don't," it was useless.

"He can't treat you like that, after all you have done for him," she frowned.

"He is not angry with me. Not much," the agent explained, "he is scared. It's simple as that Ms. Potts. You guys scare the shit out of him."

"I thought we planned it well but we're still putting too much pressure on him," Bruce said thoughtful. Natasha sat on his lap, she felt unwell too. It was obvious by the way her body tensed with each passing minute.

"I'd like to inform you that agent Barton left the apartment," Jarvis chimed up.

"Where is he?" Tony stood up.

"Air duct, on his way to the roof." Phil and Natasha stated in unison.

"Correct," Jarvis agreed.

"Go and get your boy, I want to open my presents." Tony winked while he ushered Phil out of the room.

Steve followed the agent to offer his help.

"Talk with him," Phil stopped in front of the door, "I think he could use a friend."

"Are you sure?" Steve opened the door, the air was cold and wet.

Phil nodded.

Steve looked around the roof and spotted Clint on the edge of the building. "Planning to jump?" he kept his tone light.

"No," Clint shook his head. "I have too much to live for."

"Good to know," Steve sat down next to him. "Why did you run?"

"I felt trapped," the archer stared down at the city.

"We worry about you," that was the truth.

"Thank you for what you're doing, even if I seem ungrateful."

"I don't think you're ungrateful, just scared," Cap put a hand on the back of Clint's neck, in a fatherly manner.

"Did Phil tell you how we spent last Christmas?"

"No." Steve hoped the kid hadn't bled out again.

"We were in Africa, an arms dealer tried to provoke a new civil war. Phil infiltrated the syndicate while I watched, waiting for the order to shoot. It was hot like hell. After two days all hell broke loose, Phil broke his arm and dislocated his shoulder. I got him out but we had to run, the cars were destroyed and the enemy on our heels. It wasn't easy to keep him alive, he was not only hurt but dehydrated too. I gave him my water, it wasn't much but it kept him alive for one more day. On the second day I sneaked back into their camp to get more water. I don't know what was scarier, leaving him behind with all the wild and poisonous animals or creeping through a camp full of armed soldiers waiting for a chance to shoot intruders. I made it, and Phil was still alive." Clint chuckled sadly, "I got one hell of a lecture."

"For sneaking back into the camp?"

"No. For giving him all the water, okay and for sneaking back into the camp. I spent more time in medical than he did, because of dehydration."

"Idiot," Steve said fondly.

"I didn't know how long the rescue team would need. So I took a sip whenever it was absolutely necessary." Phil had been terribly angry.

"That was a lousy Christmas."

"One of the better ones."

Steve almost choke on his own spit as he sucked in a breath, "Good you're with us now."

"I like living here but I have trouble to get used to it. I was never rich, or had more than fitted into one bag but now Tony provides everything I need. I can't pay him back."

"Tony likes spoiling people he likes. You don't have to pay him back," Steve pulled the archer closer as he felt him tremble.

He wasn't dressed warm enough.

"Let's go back inside, son," Steve loved the archer more and more. He always wondered how it felt to be a father. Now he was sure that what he felt for the archer came pretty close to it.

"Can we stop at our apartment first? I need to get your presents," Clint liked Steve's touches.

They weren't sexual or threatening. Cap's touch was caring and provided Clint with a sense of safety. He knew these huge hands would never hurt him.

They were made to protect and not to destroy.

Phil turned around and left with a fond smile on his face, letting Captain America handle things was a good call.

::::::::::::

"Time for presents." Tony clapped his hand like a kid in a candy shop as Cap and Clint appeared in the living room.

It was Tony's way to signal that no apology was needed.

Steve opened his presents first, they all sat on the ground in front of the tree like children.

Clint got Cap a new sketchbook and an expensive set of pencils. "That's great," he beamed happily. "Thank you!"

Clint smiled back, glad that he chose the present right.

Shopping for Tony had been the hardest, what do you give a billionaire?

Clint decided to get Tony a Lego mindstorm set, it was nothing for someone who could build an army of pretty and shiny robots but Lego was a classic.

Pretty look combined with nostalgia.

"Awesome," Stark cheered, and he seemed to mean it.

"Hell, thank you Clint," he beamed at the archer. It was a nice gesture.

Tony loved the idea behind the present and of course the present itself.

"It's nothing much," Clint shrugged, the tips of his ears turned slightly pink.

"Nothing much?" Tony huffed and held up the package. "Have you any idea how much mischief you and I can cause with this?"

You and I? Barton looked at Tony in shock.

"I'm not playing alone, that's boring. Two minds are better than one and Bruce isn't fun where electronic is concerned but I heard you have a knack for gimmickry." Tony was sure they would have a lot of fun, if the archer agreed.

"I'm in." Clint couldn't suppress the mischievous grin that appeared without permission.

"Great. Tomorrow 4 p.m.," he intended to sleep in.

"Deal."

Phil watched his husband with glee, it went better than he'd thought it would.

Pepper got a pretty and delicate necklace, Clint knew it was not much for someone who could afford the most expensive necklaces on earth but she seemed happy nonetheless.

"Where did you find it? It looks old," she played with the pendant, a golden ballerina.

"In Tokyo last week," Clint confessed, the mission was classified.

"Thank you," she meant it, she was Phil's friend and had nothing in common with the archer but it was a very nice gesture. She didn't get him anything.

Clint and Phil booked a romantic all inclusive weekend for Natasha and Bruce in Aspen.

The happiness on Widow's face was breathtaking, it pronounced her beauty even more and Bruce couldn't take his eyes off her.

"Thank you," Bruce gave Clint a thankful smile. He got the girl of his dreams thanks to the kind-hearted archer.

Dr. Banner was proud to have the right to say that Clinton Barton was his friend, and the fact that Hulk considered Clint a friend made it even more special.

The archer was probably Hulk's first friend, and would likely always remain his only best friend.

Now it was Phil's turn to open his present, carefully and as controlled as possible.

He felt like a child, "That's..."

It was a Captain America collectors card, hand signed and very old.

The card, including the signature of Captain America, was older than Phil himself.

"I remember these," Cap gasped. "It's from the stack of cards they gave me to sign, after they made me their poster boy," the first stack of cards he ever signed.

"Where?" Phil was at a loss for words.

"Found it in an antique shop," the old man was proud of owning the card but he was old and he told Clint that he would gladly sell it to him, the only condition was that the archer had to treasure the card and love it.

Barton had told him that the friend he was buying it for would love the card to death.

Phil put the card back into the box to protect it from harm before he locked his lips with Clint's.

"You're the best," the older agent panted against Clint's lips, the joy in his older husbands eyes took Clint's breath away.

"I hope so." Clint blushed, he wasn't sure the gift was good enough for Phil.

"Two awesome presents this year, you're indeed the best."

"Two?" Clint cocked his head.

The other's gave him an isn't-it-obvious look but remained silent.

"How would you call your brush with death? Surviving tops even our dear Captain America."

Clint looked stunned. He knew Phil loved him and he knew he was the most important person for Phil but to hear him say that he was more important than his childhood crush, and not so secret obsession, was overwhelming.

"You're unbelievable," Phil kissed him again."Time for your gifts."

"My gifts?"

"Of course," Tony huffed, "we are a family."

The concept of family was utterly alien to Clint.

Sure he had Phil, Nat and Nick but even though they were his family, they weren't a real family.

A family had to be big and loyal and close and love each other to death.

Phil gave him what he needed and so did Nat but that was far from what the Avengers offered him.

Was it possible for someone like Clint to have everything he ever dreamed of?

"Calm down," Phil whispered close to his ear. "It's okay," he placed a kiss on his archer's temple.

"Thank you," Barton gave them a honest smile.

"Don't thank us yet," Tony got up and got Clint's gifts.

"That's from me." Cap gave him an insecure smile, obviously Captain America was as nervous as he had been about the value of his gift.

It was a sketch book with the title, Christmas 2012, Avenger family.

Clint traced his fingers over the writing before he opened the sketch book.

"They are beautiful," the archer smiled fondly at the drawings.

Cap had drawn various events during the last weeks.

Clint cooking with Bruce.

Phil smiling at Clint after he cracked a dry joke.

Natasha and Bruce sitting on the couch, arm in arm.

Tony and Clint working on a plan to scare junior agents.

And many more.

An envelope on the last page had caught his attention and he opened it with anticipation.

It was a ticket for a baseball game.

Clint looked up, giving Cap a questioning look.

"You and I will go to this game," it was more an order than an explanation. "I will take you to your first game."

The expression on Clint's face as realization dawned on him was priceless. "Like a...," he couldn't utter these words.

"Like a father normally does, yes," Cap said for him.

"You're younger than me," Clint muttered embarrassed.

"My body is but I'm old enough to be your grandpa." Steve laughed, he got used to his new life and it was more than okay to live in a time that wasn't meant for him.

"My turn." Tony offered them a way out of their talk, Stark could see that both men were blushing by now.

Clint accepted the gift and eyed it for a moment, not sure it wouldn't explode the moment he opened it.

"MY BOW!" Clint's jaw dropped, it was his beloved bow.

Tony swallowed hard at the gratefulness the archer directed at him, the kid must love the bow more than they thought. "It's a replica but Phil constructed it with me, so it is from both of us. We used intact parts of the old one to build this, so it still owns its soul."

"Thank you Tony," Clint couldn't take his eyes off the bow.

"We changed a few things, it's more balanced, more robust and Phil bugged me into engraving a dedication." Tony pointed at the side of the bow that was facing him.

Clint turned it around and there it was in curved lines, from one end to the other 'Coulson's Hawk'

"I don't know what to say," it was beautiful beyond words.

"Then say nothing," Tony shrugged, the happiness on the archer's face was more than enough.

Phil gave Clint a smug grin, he knew Clint would love it. "No kiss?"

Clint put the bow down, carefully like he would treat a puppy, and gave his husband a loving kiss, "Love you."

"I know," Phil said self-confident.

"We have new arrows, too," Natasha beamed, she fell prey to the sneaky Christmas spirit.

"Of course we have," Tony 'tsked', "and quiver, and we modified your uniform a little."

They did everything in their might to offer more protection.

"I don't think Nick will approve."

"Au contraire my friend, he was excited, especially after I told him the secret behind one of my weapon upgrades," the upgrade had been for Coulson but it would have felt wrong to keep just one agent safer.

"Sneaky," the archer clicked his tongue.

He wasn't sure if he was glad or terrified that his husband teamed up with Tony Stark.

"That's from us," Bruce gave Clint a box.

It contained a self-made gift certificate for dinner with the whole team at Clint's favorite place and a brand new pair of sunglasses.

"The shades are from the big guy. He said your actual ones got damaged a while ago," Bruce explained why he gave him shades of all things, in winter.

Hulk was right, one glass and the plastic suffered from the impact of a detonation and he hadn't replaced it yet.

"Thanks big guy, and Bruce," he loved the green monster and the gentle doctor.

"That's from me," Natasha pointed at a box next to him. "Belt, including the best tracking system we have, get lost one more time and I make sure nobody ever finds you again."

"Love you, too, Nat," the belt was pretty and suited his uniform just fine.

"My turn." Phil took a deep breath, his voice had lost some of its confidence.

The nervous vibe from earlier in the evening was back, what puzzled Clint.

It was just a gift, they shared many gifts over the years but his husband had never been so nervous.

If they weren't already married he would have said that he was going to propose.

"Wait a moment," the older man got up and vanished somewhere in the hall.

Clint's mouth formed an excited 'O' as his husband returned with a golden retriever baby in his arms. The little one had a red ribbon around his tiny neck, "I promised you that we'd get a dog one day."

"That was years ago," Clint's eyes followed the puppy in his husbands arms.

Phil returned to his spot on the couch. "It's time to hold my word," the puppy looked around before he locked eyes with Clint.

The puppy sniffed on Clint before he put one tiny fluffy paw on the archer's arm, trying to change his cuddle partner.

"Come here," Clint smiled gently while he picked the dog up. "What's his name?"

"He's yours," Phil beamed, all his worry vanished the moment he saw Clint's face light up as he set eyes on the dog.

The archer looked at his little friend for a long time, not sure if he should voice his choice.

"You made up your mind, so why keep it from us?" Bruce said gently, it was obvious by the look Clint gave the dog.

"Barney," a fond smile graced the archer's lips.

Natasha winced and Phil looked at Clint in utter disbelief.

"Who is Barney?" Tony looked from Natasha to Coulson, something was terribly wrong.

"My big brother."

"The one who tried to kill you?" Tony raised a brow.

Steve looked just as surprised.

"Your brother tried to kill you?" Pepper jerked her head around to get a look at Tony, waiting for a sign that he was kidding. He wasn't.

"I love him nonetheless," Clint pressed the puppy closer to his chest, caressing the soft fur.

Barney gave out a cute bark and licked Clint's hand.

"Welcome to the family Barney," Phil raised his glass.

"Welcome," the others joined in, it wasn't the time to pry into their friends childhood.

"Woof." Barney wiggled happily with his tail.

::::::::::::::

Barney slept in his basket near the bed, all the excitement wore him out.

"Thank you," Clint cupped Phil's cheeks in his hands and kissed him hard. "It was the best day in my godforsaken life, aside from our marriage of course."

"I wasn't sure I made the right choice," the tension between them at the beginning wasn't nice at all.

"You always know what's best for me," the older agent was his personal guardian angel. "My gift for you seems so meaningless compared to our little one," he added while he removed his hands from Phil's face to wrap the around the older man's middle.

"Are you kidding? The gift is awesome," Phil was honest. "It's special, not only because it was signed by Rogers, no, because it got it from you. You bought it for me because you know exactly how much I like stuff like that. You bought it for me because you love me the way I am. Nerdy and all."

Clint remained silent, reaching out via their bond. He couldn't put into words how much these past hours meant to him.

"Me too, me too." Phil guided them to their bed.

"What am I doing with him while we're at work?" the question popped into Clint's mind while he took one last look at his new friend before he switched off the light.

"He's officially a member of S.H.I.E.L.D."

"You're kidding," the archer deadpanned.

"Nope." Coulson put his arms around his husband, "You will train him, and therefore he can accompany you while we're on base. Your fellow comrades will care for him while we're on away missions."

"We?"

"Nick's Christmas present for us. No more missions without me by your side," together or nothing at all.

"You threatened him, didn't you?"

"Maybe, a little," the agent confessed, luckily Fury loved them anyway.

"Sneaky bastard."

"I know," Phil stated smugly. "Oh, and Johnson is back home with his family. They live under close surveillance but he's home."

"Thank you," Clint asked the agency to keep Johnson alive. He wasn't a good man but he loved his children, "I can't take their daddy's life."

"I know," being a good father was the only reason the agent was still alive.

"I think being confined to a wheelchair is punishment enough," it must be hard not being able to play with your children, not walking your daughter down the aisle, no dancing with your wife...

"We had to make sure he is no threat anymore."

"I know and I'm thankful," if it had been for Phil, Johnson would be dead by now. Coulson was merciless and rarely granted a foe a way out, other than death.

Maybe it was wrong to let him live but it was easier to live with the knowledge that he could plot revenge than living with the knowledge that he made even more children half-orphans.

"We should sleep," the day had drained all the energy out of Phil.

"You're right. I have a mayhem-date with Tony after all," the archer stated with glee.

Phil sighed deeply, "and our motto will be: Save yourself if you can."

"Damn straight."

::::::::::::::

Weeks passed and the agents at HQ got used to Barton and his little sidekick.

The other agents loved Barney and spoiled him rotten, especially Hill and Sitwell.

Clint was walking down the hall as a new junior agent stopped in front of them with a smile. "Can I?" she asked, indicating that she'd like to pat Barney.

"Sure," the archer gave her a blinding smile.

Many superior agents had acknowledged that Hawkeye was happier since he joined the Avenger initiative and got the dog.

It was nice to see the young man smile more often, not his fake ones but the real smiles he so rarely showed.

"What's his name?" she returned Clint's blinding smile.

"Barney," the young woman was pretty.

"Hi Barney," she ruffled his fur. "I'm Jeanette," she looked up at Clint.

"Clint," the archer replied. "You're new."

"Yes, fresh from basic training," her face darkened. "I'm assigned to an Agent Coulson. They say he's merciless, coldhearted and not funny at all to work with."

That coaxed a chuckle out of Barton, that was his beloved husband, "Nah, they downplay his quirks."

"Funny, Clint," she gave him an irritated glare. "I don't want to work with someone like that."

"Trust me, he's good at what he does and you get the chance to work with the Avengers," he tried to calm her fears.

"We will see," she gave Barney one last pat. "Are you free? We could get coffee."

"I'm married," Clint shrugged.

"You don't wear a ring," she pointed out, there was no sign that he ever wore one.

"Hawkeye," a monotone voice echoed through the hall.

"Haw...," she gasped.

"Hey, sir. I found your new trainee. Your reputation loses some of its fierceness, I think we have to work on that."

"Do you have any ideas?" Coulson stopped next to Clint, giving him an amused glance.

"Not yet, sir."

"Hill expects you and your personal rescue dog at the training range, in ten minutes." Phil looked at his watch.

"Funny, sir."

The new agent snickered at the indication.

"I'll remind you of that next time you're trapped under debris or lost in Herbin," the twinkle in his eyes changed from amused to concern.

"Come Barney," Clint huffed in mock annoyance, "Hill is waiting."

"The Avengers are there, too," Phil called out, he could see the change in his lover's posture.

His steps were lighter and his shoulders more relaxed. Maria had a talent to make Clint nervous.

"I'm agent Jeanette Bryant," she offered Phil her hand. "You can call me Jeanette."

"Agent Coulson," he took her hand, his first name was not an option. "Come with me, I show you around."

She nodded, swallowing hard.

Could it be possible that Clint didn't lie about Coulson?

:::::::::::

"Hey ol' man, what are you doing here?"

"We agreed to train the new agents," Steve smiled, he liked to teach.

"What does our big guy teach them?" Clint frowned in Bruce's direction. "Dying 101?"

"Nope, looks rather like piss your pants 101," Iron man appeared behind him.

"Barton," Maria hollered. "Move your ass over here."

It was Clint's job to teach the kids how to hit the target.

The junior agents made fun at him at first because he was just an archer but after a few shots with various weapons their amusement died and was replaced by awe.

Sniper rifle, berretta, knives... he hit dead center with anything they gave him.

Two hours passed before Hill put an end to the training session with the argument that she needed the junior agents alive.

"Hey Phil," Cap waved at Coulson. "Who's she?"

"Agent Jeanette Bryant," he stated. "She's my trainee until further notice."

"What have you done?" Tony smirked.

"What makes you think I have done something to deserve punishment?"

"Because Fury gave you a trainee, you hate that," Natasha sneaked up behind Bryant, startling her.

"We had a little disagreement about future assignments," it was his punishment for threatening him and not inviting him to the Christmas party, as if he would ever set a foot into Stark Tower.

"I'm Natasha," she eyed the other woman.

"Code name Black Widow," Phil clarified, she was a legend.

"The famous Black Widow," Jeanette stuttered in awe, the woman was great.

Pretty, elegant and deadly.

"The one and only," Natasha nodded. "That's my boyfriend. Dr. Bruce Banner," she made her tenure very clear.

"The Hulk?" she heard about the doctor, he looks calm and gentle. Not dangerous at all.

"Yep, our big guy," Clint patted Bruce on the back.

"I don't think I have to introduce Mr. Stark and Rogers to you," Phil pointed at them.

"No, I'm delighted to meet you," it was still hard to believe that she was on a team with heroes. Her fellow agents would envy her.

"Nice to meet you, too." Tony gave her his best smile, making her blush.

Steve shook his head, "Don't mind him, he's taken."

"Not my type anyway."

"Hey," Tony said offended. "What's wrong with me?"

"She has set her eyes on agent Barton," Phil said sour.

"Ups," Tony rubbed the back of his head. "Get him out of your mind, sweetheart and that really fast."

"I told her I'm married." Clint rolled his eyes.

"Our dear Coulson is married, too." Steve gave her a broad hint, but she didn't get it.

"No offence, sir but who would marry you?" the words were out before she could stop herself.

Two young agents stopped in their tracks, giving her a shocked look.

She had spent two hours with the guy and he was everything his fellow comrades said he was and in the field probably even more. Clint was obviously right.

Barton's jaw dropped and Phil raised a hand to stop the archer before he could say something he would regret.

Okay, he wouldn't regret it but Phil had to live with the fallout.

A frightened trainee was not fun in the long run.

Therefore Barney growled at her but he was too well trained to bite her. His friends would be disappointed.

"I'm hungry, someone else hungry? Come, the mess is waiting for us." Tony shoved them out of the room.

"Coulson," Fury entered the mess hall and settled down next to Phil.

"I see you found your little present."

"Yeah, thank you, sir."

"You're welcome."

"How are you holding up?" Nick asked Bryant. "He's a badass extraordinaire."

"He's tough," she agreed, not sure what to say. She already dug a few feet of her own grave with her stupid comment.

"You should see him in the field. Calm, controlled and efficient," Nick praised, his friend deserved some approval once in a while.

Hopefully not too soon, "I'm looking forward to it."

"Try not to get shot," Sitwell said while he passed by.

"Do you get hurt often, Clint?" she gave him a gentle look.

"Sometimes," he shrugged, "but that's not Phil's fault"

Clint could feel the pain in Phil's heart at the question.

"But a handler has to bear responsibility for his assets," she wanted to become the best handler in S.H.I.E.L.D.

"One thing you will learn pretty soon is that you can't save anyone. Surviving is not part of our job description," Clint gesticulated with his fork while he talked. He knew Sitwell's comment wasn't meant for Phil but him.

"In and out. Simple isn't it?"

"Naive little girl," Tony sighed dramatically. "You have to learn how the world works."

"Don't worry, Coulson will teach you how handler work," his earpiece chimed up. "See you later," Fury got up and left, cursing about shitty timing and bad food.

"How was your baseball game last night?" Phil asked, he had fallen asleep before Clint returned.

"Awesome," Clint beamed. "I had fun."

Steve looked satisfied, "Our team won," nothing more needed to be said.

The evening was nice and gave them the chance to bond. The archer was a wonderful person, kind-hearted and cheerful like a child whenever he got the chance to let go of his grown up behavior.

They stepped by far too late into his life but they would use the time they had to make it right. To show him what he missed and how it felt to have a functional family.

"You went to a baseball game?" Jeanette quirked a brow.

"Yes, got the ticket for Christmas, right ol' man?"

"Right," Cap nodded, "we spend a lot of time together but sometimes we need time to care for each individually."

Cute, she though sarcastically. "Can we return to work related topics?"

"Newbie's", Phil grumbled, "trainings room in twenty minutes," he would teach her a lesson.

"Yes, sir," Clint gave him a sloppy salute.

:::::::::::

Phil demonstrated Bryant their training program and she had to come up with a suitable strategy for the team.

She gave out her orders, rolling her eyes as they argued with her about her tactic.

It was her op and no one had the right to butt in all the time.

Not even Clint, even though he was the one she wanted to impress.

Her plan was an absolute mess, nothing went according to plan and she seethed inwardly.

"Hawkeye get down there and provide back up for Captain America."

"Negative, my position got compromised. Can't leave anytime soon," he tried to dodge the dozen rockets that were approaching.

"Hulk help Captain America," she tried to come up with a backup plan.

The green guy defended Cap from the huge robot but got hit by a huge taser.

Natasha gave her best against the doombot replicas but had to retreat, "I need help."

Tony took most bots out, ignoring the armada of spears that shot out of the wall for a moment.

He was able to dodge most of them but one.

Clint was fast enough to destroy the spear before it hit Tony.

It wasn't a threat for the armor but Clint knew it would hurt nonetheless, maybe cause even bruises, so he sacrificed his last arrow.

"Thanks, man," Iron man fired his repulsor at the bot behind Clint.

"Stick to the plan," she was angry, her first 'mission' was a disaster.

Phil ended the trainings session after Clint got hit by one of the taser.

"Congratulation Agent Bryant you just got my husband killed," Coulson strolled back into the room.

Hulk carried Clint over to Phil, "Cupid hurt."

"I'm not big guy, you can let me down," he patted Hulk's arm. "I'm fine, sir."

Phil reached out for Clint, checking for injuries. "Let him down, he's okay."

Hulk put Clint carefully down before he transformed back to Bruce.

"I told you so," Clint squeezed Phil's shoulder.

Barney had followed Phil into the room and was now sitting next to Clint's feet, glaring at the new woman.

"Husband?" she stuttered, watching them interact.

Oh god, she was as good as dead.

"Don't forget what Sitwell told you," Phil gave Clint a peck on the cheek. "Don't shoot her."

That scared her even more. She had totally misunderstood Jasper's comment.

"Okay," but he schemed something else. "Hey Tony, would you like to putter around this evening?" it was their code for, would you like to help me giving people a hard time?

"Always, kiddo," Tony smirked dangerously.

"Let her live," Phil whispered into Clint's ear.

"Yes, sir."

:::::::::::

Barney knew his way around the air ducts, Clint had taught him how to move in them the second day they met.

They had spent a lot of time in them since then, "It's your last test, buddy. After that you're a real S.H.I.E.L.D agent."

Barney barked quietly, his human friend was famous for dropping out of ceilings.

He had seen it on more than one occasion, people didn't appreciate the archer's quirk.

"Here she is," Clint opened the grid without a noise.

He and Barney looked down at the hall, "Three, two, one."

Barney jumped onto her back with a loud, "WOOF," tackling her to the ground with the force of his weight.

Her scream echoed through the hall, catching everyone's attention.

Phil leaned against the doorway of his office, eyes glittering with mischief.

Nick and Maria waited in front of the elevator, snickering at her misfortune.

Even her fellow junior agents couldn't hide their grins, she wanted to work with the best and that was what came of it.

The End