Here In Me
PrincessKayte
Standard Disclaimers Apply.
Couples: H/R, F/G
Rating: PG-13 for language, adult moments and themes.
~*~
Part One
Awakening
~*~
Chapter I
~*~
It seemed to Ron that nothing could possibly be worse. It was that horrible day before the end of school; that bittersweet day when you hugged yourself to keep from crying while laughing along with all the rest. Ron knew it was useless to keep it a secret any longer. It wasn't fair to anyone to not know. After all, every single teacher at Hogwarts knew- not to mention Ginny, and Fred, and George, and all the other Weasleys at school. It wasn't fair to keep it from neither Harry nor Hermione any longer. After all, he would have to live with one of them over the summer. He steeled himself and knocked on the 7th-year dormitories. A tousle- headed Lee Jordan opened the door.
"Hi, Ron," he said kindly- 'Christ,' Ron thought, 'Even Lee knows!', and took Ron by the shoulder. "You're right on time."
"Time for what?" Ron looked around the dormitory. It looked how it always had- messy, loved, and lived-in. Ron loved that dormitory. He had always been welcomed because he was Fred and George's little brother, and Lee had taken a liking to him as well. As far as the three of them were concerned, Ron was good enough to have access to the coveted 7th-Year dormitory.
"Exploding Snap, you prude," George yelled as Fred chased him across the dormitory. Fred jumped on George, pinning him to a rumpled and mussed bed with his knees on George's chest. Fred shoved his hands up under George's too-small turtleneck shirt and began scattering his fingertips across the boy's chest. George was howling for mercy and writhing beneath his brother.
"Stoppit, Fred, damn you," he said, between bouts of laughter. "I hate it when you-" he exploded into a wild coughing fit, and Fred stopped, alarmed. Ron looked over at them, bemused. He knew what came next, everyone did. His eyes studied the two for a moment as George continued to hack. Fred's blue eyes were wide with concern and he cradles George's head in his palms so George didn't smack his skull against the bedbox. George's eyes were squeezed shut, tears welling from them as he coughed, face pink. Fred would, in a moment, panic and lift his knees off of George's chest. That was when George struck.
Ron had timed it perfectly, like usual. George ceased coughing, flipped Fred off of him, then pounced down onto his brother and began his own merciless father-light attack of Fred's chest and armpits. Fred howled, if it was possible, even louder then George did. Ron and Lee exchanged a look as Fred and George calmed down. Fred managed to push George off of him and they lay in an exhausted heap at their brother's feet.
"That was an excellent game, Ronnikins," George said breathlessly. "It was a shame you had to miss it."
"Cheater," Fred growled good-naturedly at his twin. George always cheated, Fred would chase him across the dormitory, and the game would end just as it had; just as it always did. Ron sat down across from the panting, red-faced twins. He longed for someone to have such a relationship with. Fred and George often scolded him and told him that he did. Ron could not recall ever having rolled across the floor with someone, or even getting up to such antics as the twins did. They had simply tapped his nose and told him that he had a relationship like theirs. 'You just haven't found it yet, Ronnikins,' Fred would say. George would agree.
"Well, d'you know where you are staying yet?" George asked Ron gently. He knew it was an especially sensitive subject with the youngest Weasley boy, the most proud Weasley, aside from Percy, and the most undisputedly sensitive. Both Fred and George knew, however much he tried to hide it, Ron was the most upset by the transfer. He was the most upset about Arthur as well.
"I haven't asked yet," Ron said gloomily.
"WHAT?!" Fred exploded. "Christ, Ron, it's the last day of school tomorrow! We leave on the train at noon! You better have someone in mind, you bloody prat." "Give him a brake, Fred," George waved off the verbal attack. "D'you at least have someone in mind?"
"Of course he does!" Lee broke in then. Lee had been trying very hard to stay out of the personal lives of Fred and George, finding them very complicated, but he needed to butt in at this moment, push Ron in the direction needed. He knew George and Fred would not pressure or even suggest anything to Ron about this. "He's gonna go stay with Harry, aren't you?"
"Erm," Ron reddened a little. "The thought crossed my mind."
"Of course it did," Fred said airily, not to mention loudly, yawning and waving his hand importantly. "Everyone knows that Ickle Ronnikins FANCIES the famous Harry Potter-" He stopped as soon as he realized what he had said.
"Fred!" George looked horrified. 'Why the hell'd you blurt that out?" Ron looked stunned, and hurt, and Lee Jordan immediately regretted saying anything about Harry.
'For your information, Fred," Ron spat angrily, "I am not going to Harry's, because he's upset with me. And, because Ginny's already staying with him."
"Ginny?" George sounded surprised. "Why's Ginny staying with him?"
"Because she asked him." Ron glared hatefully at Fred, who laughed nervously.
"Well, you can stay too, can't you?"
"No," Ron spat at Fred again, and Fred quailed in front of his angry, 5-inch-taller brother, and shrunk back to George. "Harry isn't allowed to have more then one person stay with him. That's what Ginny told me, at least."
"Well, you can always stay with Hermione," Fred said, when Lee suddenly thought of something. His face lit up.
"Ron," he blurted, and the redhead turned to him. "Does Harry even know why Ginny has to stay with him?" Ron blinked. The thought never occurred to him.
"No, she didn't," he mused thoughtfully. "He said yes because he likes Ginny. I mean, he fancies her."
"Does he," George mused to himself. "I think you're wrong, Ron. I don't think he fancies Ginny at all."
"You don't, do you," Ron turned, seething, to his brother. "Well, I think he fancies her quite a lot. I think he fancies her so much that he keeps all those stupid love poetries she sent to him! He showed me, and told me how sweet she is, and how like me she is, and how fun she is to be with, and how." Ron stopped, looking embarrassed with himself. "I'm so stupid. How could I ever think Harry'd like me, of all people! He's not even like that, I bet."
"You'd be surprised how many people are 'Like that' here, Ron."
"Oh, yes. Like who?" Ron replied, sarcastic.
"Well," Fred said thoughtfully, chewing on his long fringe, "Like Perce, for example. Or Charlie."
"Percy? Charlie?" Ron sounded incredulous.
"Mmhmm," George murmured to himself. "Like Lee," Lee grinned and pointed at himself. "And like Fred and I."
"Fred? You?" Ron was at a loss. "You never told me, and you knew about me?"
"Wasn't any of your business," Fred sniffed. "You weren't old enough to understand, anyway." Ron sighed, his eyes downcast. George looked at Ron for a moment then, really looked, and was startled at what he saw.
No longer was Ron the little boy, worried but cheerful, he had known growing up. While Ron had always been an easy target, a target for vast amounts of wicked practical jokes, Ron had always been patient and kind. It was now George noticed how old he looked, more like Arthur every day, his messy red hair falling limp into those liquid brown eyes, so deep you could drown in them, soul-searing and always ripping the truth from the heart of those under their gaze. A tall and skinny young man, Ron was and always had been tall and long. His fingers especially, his fingers and his hands were almost fluid in their movement, and move often they did. The restlessness now shrouding Ron had never been there in his youth. George remembered Ron as such a carefree little boy. He felt, with a tugging, painful jerk at his heart, that he was looking at a stranger.
"Ron," he whispered, shocking the entire room. 'What's happened to you?" "I've grown up, I suppose," he answered listlessly, again those graceful hands moving, fiddling with the sleeves of his shirt. "I didn't mean to become this horrible, moody thing I am." He sighed, dropping his long, pale arms to his sides. "I'm sorry I'm a disappointment, George. I never meant to disappoint you." He was quiet. "That's why Dad left, isn't it. I was too much a disappointment to stand any longer."
"Oh, Ron, that isn't true," George said weakly, knowing Ron would never believe him. Seeing Ron turn from him in sadness ripped at his soul.
Knowing he could never tell Ron the truth hurt even more.
PrincessKayte
Standard Disclaimers Apply.
Couples: H/R, F/G
Rating: PG-13 for language, adult moments and themes.
~*~
Part One
Awakening
~*~
Chapter I
~*~
It seemed to Ron that nothing could possibly be worse. It was that horrible day before the end of school; that bittersweet day when you hugged yourself to keep from crying while laughing along with all the rest. Ron knew it was useless to keep it a secret any longer. It wasn't fair to anyone to not know. After all, every single teacher at Hogwarts knew- not to mention Ginny, and Fred, and George, and all the other Weasleys at school. It wasn't fair to keep it from neither Harry nor Hermione any longer. After all, he would have to live with one of them over the summer. He steeled himself and knocked on the 7th-year dormitories. A tousle- headed Lee Jordan opened the door.
"Hi, Ron," he said kindly- 'Christ,' Ron thought, 'Even Lee knows!', and took Ron by the shoulder. "You're right on time."
"Time for what?" Ron looked around the dormitory. It looked how it always had- messy, loved, and lived-in. Ron loved that dormitory. He had always been welcomed because he was Fred and George's little brother, and Lee had taken a liking to him as well. As far as the three of them were concerned, Ron was good enough to have access to the coveted 7th-Year dormitory.
"Exploding Snap, you prude," George yelled as Fred chased him across the dormitory. Fred jumped on George, pinning him to a rumpled and mussed bed with his knees on George's chest. Fred shoved his hands up under George's too-small turtleneck shirt and began scattering his fingertips across the boy's chest. George was howling for mercy and writhing beneath his brother.
"Stoppit, Fred, damn you," he said, between bouts of laughter. "I hate it when you-" he exploded into a wild coughing fit, and Fred stopped, alarmed. Ron looked over at them, bemused. He knew what came next, everyone did. His eyes studied the two for a moment as George continued to hack. Fred's blue eyes were wide with concern and he cradles George's head in his palms so George didn't smack his skull against the bedbox. George's eyes were squeezed shut, tears welling from them as he coughed, face pink. Fred would, in a moment, panic and lift his knees off of George's chest. That was when George struck.
Ron had timed it perfectly, like usual. George ceased coughing, flipped Fred off of him, then pounced down onto his brother and began his own merciless father-light attack of Fred's chest and armpits. Fred howled, if it was possible, even louder then George did. Ron and Lee exchanged a look as Fred and George calmed down. Fred managed to push George off of him and they lay in an exhausted heap at their brother's feet.
"That was an excellent game, Ronnikins," George said breathlessly. "It was a shame you had to miss it."
"Cheater," Fred growled good-naturedly at his twin. George always cheated, Fred would chase him across the dormitory, and the game would end just as it had; just as it always did. Ron sat down across from the panting, red-faced twins. He longed for someone to have such a relationship with. Fred and George often scolded him and told him that he did. Ron could not recall ever having rolled across the floor with someone, or even getting up to such antics as the twins did. They had simply tapped his nose and told him that he had a relationship like theirs. 'You just haven't found it yet, Ronnikins,' Fred would say. George would agree.
"Well, d'you know where you are staying yet?" George asked Ron gently. He knew it was an especially sensitive subject with the youngest Weasley boy, the most proud Weasley, aside from Percy, and the most undisputedly sensitive. Both Fred and George knew, however much he tried to hide it, Ron was the most upset by the transfer. He was the most upset about Arthur as well.
"I haven't asked yet," Ron said gloomily.
"WHAT?!" Fred exploded. "Christ, Ron, it's the last day of school tomorrow! We leave on the train at noon! You better have someone in mind, you bloody prat." "Give him a brake, Fred," George waved off the verbal attack. "D'you at least have someone in mind?"
"Of course he does!" Lee broke in then. Lee had been trying very hard to stay out of the personal lives of Fred and George, finding them very complicated, but he needed to butt in at this moment, push Ron in the direction needed. He knew George and Fred would not pressure or even suggest anything to Ron about this. "He's gonna go stay with Harry, aren't you?"
"Erm," Ron reddened a little. "The thought crossed my mind."
"Of course it did," Fred said airily, not to mention loudly, yawning and waving his hand importantly. "Everyone knows that Ickle Ronnikins FANCIES the famous Harry Potter-" He stopped as soon as he realized what he had said.
"Fred!" George looked horrified. 'Why the hell'd you blurt that out?" Ron looked stunned, and hurt, and Lee Jordan immediately regretted saying anything about Harry.
'For your information, Fred," Ron spat angrily, "I am not going to Harry's, because he's upset with me. And, because Ginny's already staying with him."
"Ginny?" George sounded surprised. "Why's Ginny staying with him?"
"Because she asked him." Ron glared hatefully at Fred, who laughed nervously.
"Well, you can stay too, can't you?"
"No," Ron spat at Fred again, and Fred quailed in front of his angry, 5-inch-taller brother, and shrunk back to George. "Harry isn't allowed to have more then one person stay with him. That's what Ginny told me, at least."
"Well, you can always stay with Hermione," Fred said, when Lee suddenly thought of something. His face lit up.
"Ron," he blurted, and the redhead turned to him. "Does Harry even know why Ginny has to stay with him?" Ron blinked. The thought never occurred to him.
"No, she didn't," he mused thoughtfully. "He said yes because he likes Ginny. I mean, he fancies her."
"Does he," George mused to himself. "I think you're wrong, Ron. I don't think he fancies Ginny at all."
"You don't, do you," Ron turned, seething, to his brother. "Well, I think he fancies her quite a lot. I think he fancies her so much that he keeps all those stupid love poetries she sent to him! He showed me, and told me how sweet she is, and how like me she is, and how fun she is to be with, and how." Ron stopped, looking embarrassed with himself. "I'm so stupid. How could I ever think Harry'd like me, of all people! He's not even like that, I bet."
"You'd be surprised how many people are 'Like that' here, Ron."
"Oh, yes. Like who?" Ron replied, sarcastic.
"Well," Fred said thoughtfully, chewing on his long fringe, "Like Perce, for example. Or Charlie."
"Percy? Charlie?" Ron sounded incredulous.
"Mmhmm," George murmured to himself. "Like Lee," Lee grinned and pointed at himself. "And like Fred and I."
"Fred? You?" Ron was at a loss. "You never told me, and you knew about me?"
"Wasn't any of your business," Fred sniffed. "You weren't old enough to understand, anyway." Ron sighed, his eyes downcast. George looked at Ron for a moment then, really looked, and was startled at what he saw.
No longer was Ron the little boy, worried but cheerful, he had known growing up. While Ron had always been an easy target, a target for vast amounts of wicked practical jokes, Ron had always been patient and kind. It was now George noticed how old he looked, more like Arthur every day, his messy red hair falling limp into those liquid brown eyes, so deep you could drown in them, soul-searing and always ripping the truth from the heart of those under their gaze. A tall and skinny young man, Ron was and always had been tall and long. His fingers especially, his fingers and his hands were almost fluid in their movement, and move often they did. The restlessness now shrouding Ron had never been there in his youth. George remembered Ron as such a carefree little boy. He felt, with a tugging, painful jerk at his heart, that he was looking at a stranger.
"Ron," he whispered, shocking the entire room. 'What's happened to you?" "I've grown up, I suppose," he answered listlessly, again those graceful hands moving, fiddling with the sleeves of his shirt. "I didn't mean to become this horrible, moody thing I am." He sighed, dropping his long, pale arms to his sides. "I'm sorry I'm a disappointment, George. I never meant to disappoint you." He was quiet. "That's why Dad left, isn't it. I was too much a disappointment to stand any longer."
"Oh, Ron, that isn't true," George said weakly, knowing Ron would never believe him. Seeing Ron turn from him in sadness ripped at his soul.
Knowing he could never tell Ron the truth hurt even more.