SEQUEL TO HOW A RESURRECTION REALLY FEELS!
AN: I wasn't planning on making a sequel, but this idea came and I had to write it. If you read No Beginning, No End there will be a mention of Jared and Kim in the next chapter which inspired me to see what was going on in their lives at that moment. So here it is the sequel to How a Resurrection Really Feels, something that has been requeted from me for months, ever since I finnished that story. I'm happy to say that I'm excited to get back into Jared and Kim's life, which has been the easiest story for me to life for reasons still unknown to me. It's still from Jared's POV too, because I love his mind. Thank you and READ AND REVIEW!!
DISCLAIMER: I do no own this. Only the idea.
Chapter 1: The Sad Pirate
Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
Just keep telling me facts
And keep making me smile
- This Modern Love by Bloc Party
I stood in the aisle at the drug store in Olympia. It was eleven o'clock at night and the stock boy was looking at me, annoyed. He wanted me to get what I came for and then leave so he could close up the store and go home. I honestly wanted to help him out, but I was very confused at the moment. He kept glancing at me - willing me with his eyes to force me to get a move on – as he unloaded the contents of the cardboard box onto the shelf about eight feet away from me. I could hear the beeping at the cash registers as the cashiers rounded up the remaining customers who were doing last minute errands at closing time on a Wednesday night.
I wish I could help this pimply faced teenager out, but I was at a loss. I was standing in an aisle that I was feeling particularly uncomfortable about. It focused on many womanly products. Like shampoo. I know men used it just the same, but I find it very girly to be shopping for it. Also in this aisle, women's sanitary...usages. Kim had asked me to pick them up for her once before and then I put my foot down after a severely embarrassing experience where the guy at the counter at the convenience store in LaPush eyed me funnily the entire time. And when I finally returned home to Kim, she had snapped at me for picking out the wrong kind of tampons or whatever.
I groaned in frustration. It was bad enough that she had ordered me to go all the way to Olympia, just because she thought the pregnancy tests here would be more accurate. Seriously? There were more choices in a bigger town, she reasoned. There had to have been fifty different pregnancy tests to choose from. What if I picked up the wrong kind and she yelled at me? I couldn't take that tonight. I had a rough day and the last thing I needed was to be pushed out of our bedroom and onto the couch.
A pregnancy test. Could she really be pregnant? I mean, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. For me. I know Kim had her objections. We'd been together for ten years now and married for five. Surely, children were the appropriate next step. Kim had been fretting that we were becoming too boring lately. So this was something to bring to the table, wasn't it?
I know she told me she never wanted children. She had said, maybe, one day, possibly she'd agree to have a child, but as of late she'd been dead set on the no-baby front. When we'd babysit for Sam and Emily's kids she'd always eye the children warily. They weren't exactly threatening and I found it highly amusing how nonchalant she'd try to act around them. Owen and Nora were only six and four, respectively and they weren't exactly dangerous. They were harmless; all they wanted to do was have fun. Of course, Kim would pretend that she was completely cool around children, but I could see the panic in her eyes whenever another member of our pack and their imprint would announce a pregnancy. I think that was why Kim had become so close with Rachel, who had denied the idea of children as well. Paul seemed to be okay with that future.
I, on the other hand, was also okay with it too, I guess. I can't deny that in the early stages of my romance with Kim, I had often pictured little children racing around us when I saw our life together in the later years to come. But when I had brought up this possible plan with her one day, she had frozen and shook her head vehemently. Over the years I had discovered of Kim's phobia of children, and her major distaste at that prospect. She had claimed that she just wanted me all to herself forever and didn't want any interference.
I was twenty-seven now and Kim would also be by the end of this year, and I had grown to the idea of it just being her and I when we grew old together. If what she wanted was a life with no children, then I was happy to oblige to her wishes.
Now, I was in a predicament. When I had come home from work today after a particularly trying afternoon, I was bombarded with a vase being thrown at my head. Kim had yelled at me up and down, hysterically sobbing about how I had knocked her up and how she should have known I would try to pull something like this. I stood there clueless as she ranted and raved to me, not daring to speak aloud.
When I had asked if she went to a doctor she said no. I had tried to delved further into her brain so I could attempt to grasp her announcement of her pregnancy; she said she knew because she was 'late'. I nodded and said I would go to the convenient store only about half a mile from our house and buy her a pregnancy test when she had shouted at me not to. She told me that she'd rather I go to Olympia because she didn't want anyone in our tribe to know that she may be expecting and that the pregnancy tests in Olympia were surely more reliable.
I didn't understand her logic, but I was in no position to question it.
"Hey, buddy! Can I help you?" the teenager had pulled away from his task and advanced to my baffled position in the aisle, staring at the many boxes.
I held out my hand and waved them over the selections. "What's the best one?"
The boy frowned and looked at the wall of shelves. His face turned pink with embarrassment and seemed to now be wishing he never asked. "The most expensive one?"
It seemed logical enough. I scanned the prices and picked up the box. "Okay, great. But, what about this one? It seems promising...Or this one? Yeah! This one shows a smiley face if you're pregnant and a frown if you're not, that seems fitting. Though, I think in my case a smiley face would be appropriate for a negative result...This one is odd, why would it show you a pirate...? Should I just get these six?" I looked at him hopefully. He gave me a blank look and shrugged, turning back to his job.
I glared at the back of his head and decided that all I wanted to do was get the hell out of here. I took the six tests that caught my eye and walked swiftly to the cash. Every other employee was now staring at each customer with indignation as they hurried us out the door so they could all go home. When I was finally brought up to cash, the sullen elderly woman didn't even look at me once. She just barked out the price and I paid her, dread filling my heart. I didn't know what I'd be coming home to.
I walked out into the warm July night, and began my journey home. I got into the car that Jacob had helped me fix up for Kim a couple years ago, and started the engine. As I drove along the near deserted highway, I was surprised to find that I was kinda hoping that the test would be positive. I know it wasn't what Kim wanted, but as long as it accidentally happened anyway, what would it matter if I was a little hopeful? I'd never tell her that. I'd just prepare a speech to say to her in my head. If the test told us she was indeed pregnant, I'd relay words of wisdom and love to her about how it would all be okay and that I loved her very much.
For starters, I could mention that we had been together for a decade and that it wasn't so bad that a baby would be coming along. We weren't exactly teenagers, we had built a life together and we were pretty stable emotionally and especially financially. It wouldn't be a problem at all. Well, money would be a bit tight, but that wasn't what was important. What was important was that I would be with her every step of the way and I loved her deeply and I would love our child more than anything. I would even delegate my responsibilities as diaper-changer if it made her feel better in the slightest.
Yes, this would all work out. Everything will be okay.
I pulled up onto the lawn in front of our house. I grabbed the bag with the tests in them and cautiously walked to our front door. I pulled out my key and opened the door, closing it behind me.
"Kim?" I glance down at my watch and saw that it's almost midnight. Maybe she was sleeping –
"In here!" I rounded the corner and into the living room where I looked down the long room, past the kitchen table to where she was standing in our kitchen with yellow rubber gloves and the entire fridge and its contents pulled out onto the hardwood floor. She was scrubbing away at the inside. "You have no idea how filthy this fridge is! It's disgusting! And a lot of this food has expired! We should clean this more often, at least once a month!" she submerged her head completely and I just saw her lovely bottom sticking out as she worked away at cleaning the refrigerator. She certainly didn't look pregnant. Her body got my sex-drive going and I immediately felt hot.
"Uh, I got the pregnancy tests!"
She emerged and wiped her sweaty forehead and pushed her bangs aside. Her hair was up in a messy pony tail and a few strands of hair framed her face sexily. "I think I'll do all that stuff tomorrow!"
"Babe, technically in ten minutes, it will be tomorrow! You know what you can do tomorrow? Clean the fridge. Come on its late, let's get this over with," I said, placing the bag on the kitchen table and making my way over to my extremely stressed out wife.
She glared at me and pulled off her yellow rubber gloves. "Fine. Did you even get the right one?"
I froze. "Is there a right one?" I ask, hesitantly, watching her face for her reaction.
She stood up and walked over to me. She had left all the food spread out on the kitchen floor. I guess I would be putting everything back. I sighed.
"Please Kim, I tried. Let's go to the bathroom, yes?" I held out the bag and jiggled it in front of her. She did not look amused as she followed me through the living room and up the stairs. Straight ahead was the bathroom and we walked through. I put the bag in the sink and she sat on the toilet, the toilet seat closed.
"What if I'm pregnant?" I heard her quiet voice as I took out all the boxes. Who bought exactly six? Why not five? Or seven? Seven is a lucky number, I should have gotten seven. But what kinda luck was I looking for? Argh, I was so confused!
"Just take the tests first," I said.
"Tests? How many did you get, Jared?" She asked standing up. She now saw, lined up along the edge of the sink on three sides, was six pregnancy tests. "What am I supposed to do with all of these?"
"Test yourself..."
"With six?" she picked one up and frowned. "A smiley face if you're pregnant? That's horrible," she looked at it funnily, before ripping open the box. I did the same to the other five, before she had gotten the first one out. "Okay, fine, I'll use them all, go, and I'll call you when I'm...done." I piled them all in her hand and she placed them on the floor beside the toilet.
I nodded slowly and exited, closing the bathroom door behind me. I leaned against the door and waited. I had no idea how to react properly to this situation. If it was positive, should I look happy or sombre? Negative, should I cheer? I guess I would just work off Kim's reaction.
"Okay! Come in." I opened the door to find her with her back faced from the sink, where she had lined up all the pregnancy tests like I had, sans boxes. Her face is contorted in a grimace as she looks at me. "Okay, most of these say that I'll have to wait a couple minutes for a result. But, this one says only thirty seconds and so far, it's been twenty five," she points to the one on the right side, closest to the wall.
"Okay," I say slowly and suddenly my fate is crashing towards me in five seconds and I feel fear, which is a bit unnerving.
"Okay," she agrees. She turns around and picks it up. She looks at the result, and I move in closer glancing over her shoulder to see what it is. "Oh! It's negative! Oh my God, it's negative!" her voice raises high. She looks at me, beaming. "I seriously thought I was pregnant for a moment! This is such a relief. Jared!" she throws her arms around my neck and I'm aware of the fact that the test is pressed up against my skin and Kim had just peed on it.
"Mmhmm," I say, as coolly as possible. Her face falls.
"You want a baby," she states.
"Nope, I'm good, I'm just overwhelmed, is all," I say smiling at her, I lean against the wall and she watches my face carefully.
"Are you sure?" she asks. I nod along and pull her close to me. I kiss her neck and then her lips to show her how fine I am with the results. And I am, really. Sort of. I mean, I can't deny that my heart fell a bit, but when I saw how happy she was with the negative result, I felt better about it. I guess that's just the way imprinting works.
She looks at me warily before smiling; she wasn't able to hold it back. "I guess everyone experiences a pregnancy scare once in a while," she amends, turning back to the sink. She freezes in such a sudden way, that I'm alarmed.
"Kim?" I move toward her and rest my hands on her shoulders which are only up to about my chest. "What is it?" She's staring down at the sink, in shock.
I look down to see that every other pregnancy test appears to be positive. I even see a little smiley face somewhere in the mix. I pull the negative result from her clutched hand and see a sad pirate. I pick up the pirate box and read the back. Kim read it wrong. A sad pirate equalled a pregnancy. A happy pirate told you it was false. I guess pirates weren't big baby people.
"I'm pregnant," her voice is hollow. I don't know what to say, I move around her and look at all the results. Some have little plus signs, some have two stripes and some are grinning away at you. "It could be wrong..."
"But," I start. "All six of them are telling you that you are. Especially the expensive one, I mean, that one has to be the most reliable..."
She shakes her head and examines each one closely as she holds it up to her nose and peers down at them with a daunting expression. She throws each one into the sink, in defeat. She turns to me slowly and I place the pirate test on top of the other ones. I glance down at her to see her looking rather pale.
"You got me pregnant," she accuses, but what's really scary is how calm she looks.
"Not on purpose," I say quickly and I feel like a jerk for saying it. I'm even backing away from her like a coward.
"I don't want to be pregnant, Jared."
"I know that and sweetheart, I'm sorry. I'm just as surprised as you are!" I'm holding up my hands in defence, but now I'm pressed up against the door with no real escape because she's now advancing toward me.
She stops and looks up at me, her eyes are shining and I hope to God she isn't going to cry. Please, do not cry. Kim, don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry. I will you not to cry. And, she's crying. Tears are streaming down her face and she lets out a frustrated scream as she begins to sob. She falls to her knees and puts her head in her hands, crying and crying. I slide down the door and sit there with my legs open, I pull her body toward me and she buries her face in my shirt, snivelling and wiping her nose on my t-shirt. Now, weird noises are coming out of her. Ones that are extremely odd and remind me of animal sounds. She heaves and squeaks and groans and moans. It goes on like this for a very long time. All I can do is sit here, rubbing her back, pressed up against the door as she is gripping my shirt and using it as a tissue. Every time I'm about to say something, I stop myself as I think over at how stupid it would sound and how unwanted it was. I idly wonder how many tears one person can hold in a body. Would I be able to cry longer because I was such a big guy? Not that I'd ever test that theory...
It suddenly came to me that maybe she was actually trying to speak to me and those noises were possibly words. I rubbed her back a little more vigorously and she shook in my arms. Taking this as a sign that I hadn't intended, she pulls away, still blubbering and she shakily gets to her feet. I pull myself up and look her over. She's still hunched over as she pushes me aside and exits the bathroom. She goes down the hall to our bedroom. I follow her only to have the door slammed in my face. I exhale loudly and rest my forehead against the door feeling very drained. What a long day.
Did she want me to sleep on the couch? I can still hear her sniffling and heaving, so I knock on the door.
"Wha?" she calls out.
"Can I come in?" I ask. I wait for her to reply and there's nothing. I knock again but she ignores me. I'm really worried about her so I open the door a crack and peer in. She's curled up in a ball in the center of the king sized bed, sleeping. Her eyes are closed, her mouth is open slightly and she's breathing evenly. Her face is all wet and tear-stained. I open the door further and close it behind me. I take off my shoes, slide off my pants so I'm just in my boxers, I strip my shirt off and crawl in above her, so I'm in a weird position.
Over the years I had learned how to sleep more appropriately when with Kim. She still complained about my jostling while sleeping, but she admitted that I had gotten better compared to when we first started sleeping in the same bed. I was always tossing and turning and drooling and snoring. But she had also perfected sleeping through my noises and movements over the years. In fact, she had admitted that she often had trouble sleeping without my snoring to soothe her. I closed my eyes and fell asleep with her hair in my face, my body curled around hers. My feet were dangling off the edge a little, but I didn't mind...
I woke up the next morning to find myself eagle-spread across the bed with Kim nowhere to be found. I smelled eggs and bacon and the rattling of pots and pans down stairs so I figured I knew where she was. I pull myself off the bed and sleepily make my way downstairs, following the sweet smell of breakfast. As I teeter into the living room, I look down the long one big room to see the kitchen occupied by Paul.
"What are you doing here?" I snap. I remembered all the food being on the kitchen floor last night. I wondered who put it all away. Some of it must have expired if it was left out all night...
"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed!" he replied.
"Is that breakfast for me?" I pass the couch and make my way to the glass kitchen table behind it. I fall into a chair.
"Nope, this is all for me," he piles the eggs and bacon on a plate and sits himself down. For any normal person the amount of food he had could feed about three people. Paul, selfishly, ate away, ignoring me.
"Where's Kim?" I ask, sensing that she wasn't here at all.
"I donno, her and Rachel walked out the door about fifteen minutes ago," Paul said with his mouth full. He said that sentence in a more indecipherable way, but sadly, I knew exactly what he was saying. "What's up with her? She looked like she had no more hope in the world."
"Don't say that," I groaned rubbing my face, feeling stressed already and I hadn't even been awake for five minutes.
"Okay," he said. He finished his breakfast in a record time and threw his plate in the sink. "You not going to work today?" Paul asked.
I looked at the time only to find that I was half an hour late. "Aw shit," I went to the door across from the table; I opened the door and inside was our laundry room. It wasn't big but a washer and dryer were squeezed in there. There was a pile of folded clothes on top of the dryer and I rifled through them to find a pair of pants and tee.
I emerged fully clothed just in time for Kim and Rachel to enter the house.
"Hey," I said to Kim, zipping up my fly. She eyed me before passing me and going to the bathroom.
"She didn't want kids, Jared," Rachel said to me. I glared at her.
"Oh, really? I didn't get that after she cried through half the night," I snapped at her for interfering.
"Kim's pregnant?" Paul asked. Rachel sat on his lap on the couch.
"Look, I gotta go to work. Are you staying with her for the rest of the day?" I asked Rachel, impatiently. I went into the fridge to get my lunch only to remember I hadn't made myself one. I groaned for being already late, so I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl on the table and bit into, heading for the door.
"No, we're leaving soon," Rachel said.
"Fine. Bye, Kim!" I called out. I waited for a bit to see if she would respond.
I heard a little, faint, "bye," and left the house feeling quite miserable. What a disaster. I hated how upset she was. I decided to walk to work as I chewed down on the apple. It was gone too fast and I was still starving. Work was only about a mile away and with my long legs I got there in less than ten minutes.
"You're late!" Embry called out from under a car.
A few years ago we had opened up a garage. It was mostly Embry and Quil's but I started work with them the day it opened. We got a lot of business from the surrounding towns since we were quite affordable, quick and thorough. I had learned a lot about cars over the years and had become quite skilled. I still wasn't as great as Jake was, but I was pretty decent. I mostly worked in the small office and did the bills, towing, charging and ordering of parts. It was a fine job and I worked about five days a week. Embry probably worked more than any of us. Quil had Claire, who he took care of most of the time and I had a wife so we weren't able to put it in as much time as Embry. I only put in about eight hours a day and was home by five, usually. The business was doing fairly well for itself.
About a couple times a week Jacob came down to help out and earn some money for him. He, Embry and Quil were still morphing into wolves so they still did patrolling. Over the years, Sam, Paul and I had stopped our transforming as we grew older with our wives. I hadn't being a wolf in almost six months. It was weird, but oddly enough I still had the extra senses that came with being a wolf. Sam had stopped transforming first and he said eventually that would all go away. I missed being a wolf sometimes but for the most part it was a bit of a relief. Our two packs were still like brothers which was a nice thing. I often wondered about the tribe's safety in the future, but more young boys were turning into wolves as the years went on. I didn't know the newer ones as much, and Quil still claimed that the new kids didn't just click the same way we had all those years ago and how they all missed the pack being the way it was.
But, whereas Jacob would be living forever, the other guys were just holding off until they found their imprint. Quil was waiting for Claire and he still had quite a while before their age would become an issue.
I had Kim and we were moving on to our right ages. I hadn't noticed that much of a difference since I stopped transforming about two years ago with myself. I hadn't aged drastically at all. I guess in a few years I would see my body start to change, but as of right now I was still pretty much the same.
"How's today looking?" I called out as I made my way to the office, leaving the door open so I could hear a reply.
"Nowhere near as busy as yesterday," Quil replied. Music was blaring from the stereo we kept. It was all Embry's music and it was good for working on cars.
"Good," I mutter to myself and get to work.
I hoped today at work would pass by quickly because I was too anxious thinking about Kim. When I got home we'd have to sit and discuss what we planned on doing. I really hoped she would feel better about this. I hated the friction it was causing between us. I just wanted us to be a happy family.
R/R!!