John sipped idly at his drink. Truthfully, he hated the taste. It was so bitter. He doubted he could ever drink enough to have the kind of fun that was supposedly associated with alcohol. Honestly, he wasn't sure how most people could stand it. He supposed it was kind of a social thing, but in the back of his head he knew that even if he were inclined to drink socially, he'd wind up being the designated driver, anyway. Not that there were any cars to worry about here, but...someone had to keep these guys in line. Despite all odds, that person seemed to be him.
Jade and Rose both had cups in their hands and were giggling madly about something. Actually giggling. The thought boggled John's mind. In truth, he would normally have pictured Rose in the corner scribbling notes about the things they were doing, trying her best to figure out every little nuance of them without interacting. Yet there she was, almost the center of attention. She was dolled up excessively. They all were dressed nice, of course. It seemed like the thing to do. But it seemed as though she took it furthest. She was wearing a yellow and gold cocktail dress, with prominent earrings depicting her light symbol. John was wearing a simple gray suit, with a blue vest and tie. In comparison to her he seemed positively muted.
As John watched the two girls clutch each other as they succumbed to another laughing fit, Dave sidled over to him, a glass in his hand.
"Dude...I don't want to alarm you or anything but...I'm pretty sure these ladies are way over the fucking limit," Dave said.
"Heh...tell me about it. Seriously, what's all that about? Aren't they the ones who are supposed be our anchors to responsibility while we go off and do crazy stuff?" John responded.
"Man, I don't know. I feel like there's some weird gender role reversal thing going on, and you and I are like stuck in the middle like uh...damn, I thought I could think of a metaphor on the spot there."
"Damn, dude. You used to be all bout the snappy metaphors!"
"Oh man, I know. These last three years have kind of sucked. Sapped me of all my mojo. I feel like I haven't got any fresh material, ya know? I mean, like sure I could lay down some sweet 2009 burns on everyone here but it's like...what's the point?"
"I don't even really think of years anymore, now that I think about it. At least not in that way."
"Yeah, see that's what I mean. Before all this...whatever we call this cosmic clusterfuck started, I guess I always figured that in high school I would be like this Ferris Bueller mythical figure that was all cool and distant but everyone liked. And I'd DJ all the school dances and people would always be telling me to drop sick rhymes and stuff like that. But now that I'm actually at that age I think I would ultimately have ended up just sort of sitting off to the sidelines, hugging the wall at the all the school dances and everyone would have just known me as that weird emo kid who hangs out by himself all the time and makes raps about Obama."
"Dude...you made Obama raps? Man I haven't thought about like...Obama or stuff like that in..."
"Yeah, I know. See what I mean? Can't get my head out of three years ago."
"Couldn't you have written jams about being on a meteor or living with trolls or something like that?"
"Oh shit, if there's one thing I've enough of on this bullshit three year journey of darkness it's god damn trolls. I mean, at first I thought it was just gonna be sort of funny watching their stupid bullshit for three years, and it was at first, but after a while...ugh."
"Really? I got the idea that towards the end there on that day that they were starting to come around and think that...ya know...being human was kind of the way to go, and they were gonna ease off their weird troll habits somewhat and start acting more like us."
"Yeah, I thought so at first kinda, since that was basically the gist of my IM convos with them, too. I sort of thought since Rose and I were like super powerful gods now and basically stronger than all of them put together we'd be like these rad teachers who would impart the wisdom of humanity to them, and like teach them sweet jams and how not to be total douchebags. But then we started going through the dream bubbles and they started meeting their weird ancestor trolls and they got like...more troll than ever before. It was like a total fucking relapse up in there. I mean you name it: the bullshit romance habits, the moodiness and rabid angst. It was like the worst high school cliches mixed with super powers and violent tempers. Basically we just ended up in the worst anime ever, and we didn't even have the cat girl most of the time."
"Wow."
"And you know the worst part? That bullshit started to infect us. I mean initially I thought we'd be teaching them to be more human, and ultimately we just ended up being more troll. Seriously, I still use their stupid words for things on occasion. It's fucking alarming. Basically what I'm saying is: I think you guys on the HMS Golden Adventure Express or whatever you call it had a way easier time than we did. At least you didn't have to put up with that shit."
"I dunno, man. The Golden Adventure Express wasn't so hot, either. Picture a big open world RPG..."
"Dude, I don't play that stuff."
"Just bear there with me. So like...you've got this big world, but none of the people in it give you quests anymore, the story can't progress, every NPC keeps using the same stock phrases over and over and the monsters might as well not even be there because you're overpowered as all hell now. I mean, sure, for a little while you could get by with the scenery. You'd be like 'oh that's an awesome mountain!' or 'wow, check out this sweet vista!' But then after doing that for so long it's just like 'oh, there's that stupid mountain again.' I felt like freaking everything was on pause. Plus, it's not like there was a lot of opportunity for social interaction. I started going stir crazy after a while. I was even kind of seeing things."
"So, if I'm getting this right, we both had kind of a shitty three years?"
"Yeah, basically. I mean...it's not like there weren't good times, but...on the whole...yeah. Not so great in retrospect."
The two paused for a while, considering what the other had said.
"So how ya liking that drink there?" Dave asked, indicating the beverage in John's hand.
"Oh...uh...you know, it's not really my thing. I'd take Ecto Cooler any day of the week."
"Yeah I hear that. I've got straight AJ in here." Dave held up his glass. "I mean obviously I'm lying to the ladies here and saying it's cider or something suitably cool and adult, but it's really just 100% juice." Dave sighed wistfully. "I'm gonna be totally honest here, since you're like my best bro and I feel you deserve some fucking honesty. But when I saw your gaudy golden ship coming up out of the black my first thought wasn't: 'man it's gonna be so good to see John and Jade.' I was all like: 'oh shit that ship is bringing my planet and on that planet is my house and in that house is the means for me to make, essentially, infinite apple juice' and I was like 'fuck yes.' Taste of fucking home right there. Rose said she was gonna try and make up some AJ, but she kept coming up with these bullshit symbolic excuses for why she couldn't and then she'd just make more booze."
"Wait...Rose made these drinks?" John sounded surprised.
"Oh yeah. She's been all about the mixology for the last year or so. She's says it's alchemy, but I think she just says that to make it sound mystical or something. I mean let's face it, really she's just making alcohol. There's nothing really alchemical about that."
"Man it's weird she'd be so in to alcohol considering how she'd complain about her mom day in and day out."
"Dude, don't even get me started. Anyway, speaking of that ship and those planets: I'm really fucking glad it's finally here. That means we can drag that shit to the new paradise session or whatever with our weird kind of parents and then start actually doing what we were supposed to three years ago right? I mean we can finally start getting shit done with out personal quests and all that noise? Those things are supposed to like...take us on a spiritual journey and stuff, right? Learn shit about ourselves and all that?"
"Uh...I think so?"
"'Cause I've been thinking maybe doing that's gonna let me get my rhythm back or something. Because let's face it: I'm basically a shell of a young adult ruined by three years of sitting on my ass having my very existence sapped by the eternal presence of constant teenage angst. I need need a mad change of pace up in this." Dave sighed again and let his eyes fall on Jade, who was now dancing around to the music with her hands in the air. "It's nice to see Jade having some fun. I mean, the being all carefree and childish and going on about squiddles and all that was kind of cute, but it's nice to see her...you know...acting like a teenager..."
Dave's eyes take in all of Jade appearance, clearly noticing the less than childlike attributes that had replaced those Dave had remembered. John cocked an eyebrow at him.
"What?" Dave asked. "Is this like an over-protective brother stare down or something? You gonna tell me to keep my hands off you sister?" Dave smirked.
"Nah, Jade doesn't need me to do that. She could kick either of our asses ten ways to Sunday. Besides, I don't mind her dating. I mean, I was totally cool with her and Dave Sprite." Dave choked on his apple juice.
"Wait, wait, wait...what? Go back a second. She like...dated ghost bird...other me?"
"Ugh...I'm sorry, dude, I shouldn't have brought it up. Stupid stupid dumb." John thwacked his forehead with his hand.
"I'm...I'm not really sure how I feel about that..."
"Neither am I! I mean seriously-"
"How did that even work?"
"Totally, right? You know 'cause-"
"He's got a ghost butt, yeah..."
"Man, I don't know! I'm...not really sure I want to, now that I think about it. Anyway, yeah, that was a thing for about a year. Then they split. That was around a year ago now."
"I guess, if she dated a version of me...that's a good sign, right?"
"I...guess?"
"Who did the breaking up?"
"He did. Never got specifics from either of them, apart from 'he had his own stuff to deal with.'"
"Okay so...she dated a version of me, and she didn't do the breaking up..." Dave paused for a few seconds, thinking. "I don't want to like...jinx anything or something stupid like that, but I think this might just be...sort of a good omen, maybe?"
"Jeez, Dave. Didn't know you were holding a torch." John was grinning at Dave.
"Nah, man it wasn't like that. It was just something that crossed my mind occasion for...oh...the last couple of years?" John smirked, but before he could respond Jade and Rose ambled unsteadily up to them.
"What are you guys doing over here? We're supposed to be celebrating!" Rose put an heavy emphasis on the last word. Her broad smile and casual attitude still was weirding John out a little.
"We were talking about how you girls were obviously totally smashed and how we totally needed to find a way to end this and get you guys home while still sounding cool," Dave said.
"Daaaaaaaave," Jade began, giggling. "I think we should take a walk! I wanna hear about your three years!"
"I...uh...ok, sure. I'll take you for a walk." Dave said, his eyes briefly moving to her ears. John grimaced and Rose snorted. Jade, however, either didn't notice the turn of phrase or didn't care. She wobbled slightly and held out her arm. Dave grabbed it, and led her away, Jade leaning on him slightly.
Rose sighed and surveyed the leaving couple, smirking a little.
"I guess that just leaves us," she said to John, raising her eyebrows slightly.
"Uh...yeah...heh. I guess it does," John replied. He stood awkwardly for a moment, at a loss for what to do or say. Rose definitely looked different than she had three years ago. John had, of course, seen her very briefly about a year previous, but he'd been in the middle of a fight and hadn't looked all that closely. Now that he was looking, he could see Rose was very obviously not thirteen years old anymore. That dress certainly made that rather apparent in many ways. It also didn't help that John was a sixteen year old boy who had just spent three years on a very long journey where he had very little contact with the fairer sex apart from a blood relative. Compounded on top of that, Rose seemed so...different from the the wordy, snarky and somewhat introvertive girl he had known three years ago.
"How about...you show me the ship?" Rose offered helpfully.
"Oh...uh...sure. Sounds good," John said and, imitating Jade, he held out his arm. Rose took it, smiling slyly.
The two of them walked slowly though the dark and quiet meteor, heading to where the Golden ship was docked. They moved together in silence for a while before Rose decided to break it.
"I missed you," Rose said, by way of a conversation starter. John was tongue tied for a second.
"I missed you too." John said. "And Dave, obviously," he added hastily. Rose smirked.
"You know..." Rose began. "You're not exactly what I expected, John."
"What do you mean?"
"I guess in my mind I figured you'd be pretty much the same when I saw you again. Older, obviously, but I figured you'd be bouncing around the room, telling us all about how awesome the latest Nicholas Cage movie you watched was, or gushing about the adventures you'd had on your journey or making plans for what we'd do next. It was a little odd to see you so...quiet. You're a bit more guarded, now. And you kept watching us, like you were making sure everything was okay." Rose eyed him, looking casually interested.
"Well, honestly I thought you were a bit different too or...well, maybe more than a bit. I figured you'd be-"
"In a corner with a book?" Rose offered.
"Or at the very least that you'd bring a couch, trying to find out all the ways my journey here had affected my mental state adversely." Rose chuckled.
"I suppose three years is always a bit longer than it seems at first, huh?"
"I suppose it is."
The two of them ascended the gangway onto the deck of the luminous golden battleship. Rose disentangled herself from John and put her hands on her hips, swaying slightly.
"So...this was the site of your last halcyon three years?" She asked.
"Yeah. Well, here and a bunch of small planets on it..."
"How was it?"
"It was...okay." John gave a noncommittal shrug. "When we first set out I was pretty sure Jade and I were going to have the better time. Yeah, I kind of wished we could have all gone together, but in the end I thought we'd be constantly adventuring and stuff. I figured...ya know...that we had four whole planets and the battlefield, so we'd have plenty to do during that time. I figured you guys would just sort of be stuck on that meteor all cramped in together. It would have been like a submarine movie, like U-571, which was a Mcconaughey jam, except it would have lasted three years instead of two hours."
"Well how about that. A movie reference. I was a little worried that we'd lost you, John." She grabbed John's arm again and the two proceeded inside the ship.
"Heh...well yeah. I figured you guys would kind of be a little crazy by the end, but as it turns out the worlds we had just sort of stayed the same. Nothing happened, and there really wasn't anything to do. I started to miss being around more people. I mean, I couldn't even use the internet to talk to anyone anymore." John paused. "Well...it's not like Jade and the sprites aren't great and all but...I felt pretty lonely, truth be told. Damn near lost my mind about two years in."
"Really?" Rose looked interested. John supposed she hadn't completely lost her passion for psychology.
"Yeah. I kind of came to the realization all at once that a lot of things I liked growing up were kind of...a bit silly, you know? Right after that, I thought they were terrible for a while and then...I started to find different reasons to like them. That started me wondering about you guys, too. I figured if I could suddenly feel different about Con Air and stuff like that, what might have changed with you? Maybe Dave didn't like raps anymore, or maybe you suddenly thought books were lame..."
"Well...nothing that drastic, I suppose but...yeah...things are definitely different now."
"Exactly. I sort of realized then that we kind of had a lot of important stuff to do, so I started getting ready. Trying to understand my powers more. Thinking of the best way I knew how to get everyone through what was coming up, ya know? It made the last year go a little faster."
"Well, well...it seems I was right all those years ago. About you being our leader, I mean."
"I don't know about that," John said, waving his hand in a dismissive manner.
"No...it's true. You've always had those qualities, John. You just needed time to develop them more." Rose was still smirking though there was something underlying that that John couldn't really read. She looked...impressed, perhaps?
"You know...there's something I've wanted to say to you for three years," Rose said. The two of them had reached a long flight of stairs leading into a lower deck and they stood at the top of it.
"Really? What?"
"Well...the exact nature of everything I wanted to say has...changed a lot over the last three years, but I suppose in general..." she faced him, a sly smirk upturning on one side of her mouth. "I wanted to thank you for saving my life." John stared at her for a moment, lost in thought.
"Oh...that? You're welcome, I guess! I'm sure you would have done same for me, in any case. Besides, you kind of returned the favor a year ago, didn't you?"
"I suppose we got a participate in a more ideal version of the duel but...I wouldn't say my actions there were...on par with yours."
"Nah, you helped out a lot. Did you see the Bunny Sassacre Fedora I put on Jack's head?"
"It was awesome."
"Damn right, it was!"
"Be that as it may, though," Rose said, changing the subject. "I rather thought that...well...maybe I should return the favor?" Rose raised an eyebrow at him, the grin on her face broadening. It took John a few seconds to register what she was suggesting.
"Oh..." John went a bit pink in the cheeks.
"I wasn't exactly an active participant last time. I figured we could have...round two." Rose looked at him, holding her sly expression. John stared at her for a moment and then cracked up slightly. Rose looked at him more quizzically, though still smirking.
"I'm...sorry, Rose. That was...just kind of corny, is all..." Rose looked a little embarrassed and a tiny bit guilty behind that.
"Yes...well...sadly when I get a little bit...inebriated I'm prone to expounding some rather unfortunately cheesey speeches." She paused for a second and then grabbed John's tie and cinched it up to his neck, moving close to him. "Maybe I should just let my actions do the talking, hmm?" She began to slowly move in. John could smell the sweet blend of fruit and alcohol on her breath.
"Stop," John said softly, gently placing both his hands on her shoulders. She raised a questioning eyebrow, though she still continued to smile at him.
"What?"
"Well...um..." John searched for the right words. "It's really nice of you to want to do that, and I think it's sweet and everything but..."
"But?" She asked, slightly amused.
"I'd rather you...ya know...do that or...I guess want to do that...when you're...um...sober..." he finished, looking a little embarrassed. Rose's amused smile widened.
"Is that so?"
"Well..." John rubbed the back of his neck. "It's just...not really the kind of moment I'd want to...ya know...start with."
Rose snickered slightly and moved to fold her arms under chest, but as she did so she lost her balance at the edge of the stairs. She pinwheeled her arms for a few seconds before, seemingly in slow motion, she began to fall backward. There was a rush of blue as wind whipped around Rose. A split second later John was holding her, each of his legs on a different stair. He carried her down the offending incline and set her on the ground. She clutched him for support, still looking rather giggly.
"I know it's an old joke, but..." John began.
"I know, I know. I seem to have a bad habit of not listening to advice on the subject." She sighed. "That was a sweet catch, though."
"I've gotten rather good at those," John said, smiling. Rose looked at him for a moment.
"When exactly did you become the responsible one?"
"Someone had to. Somewhere over the last three years everyone else went insane." The words came out of John's mouth like a joke, but in reality it was pretty close to what he honestly felt. Rose, for her part, looked at him wide eyed for a seconds before breaking down into an uncontrollable gale of laughter that filled the entire deck. John still could not get over that his gloomy and sarcastic friend could look this alive and wildly happy.
"Oh my God, John. We really, really have. I don't...don't think you even know much that's true." She wiped tears of mirth from her eyes, calming down somewhat. "This whole three years has been...well, I don't know if I can really explain it." They began to walk down the corridor. "I guess when it comes down to it, though, it's no so surprising you're the most adult one of us at the moment."
"Why's that?"
"Well...you were always kind of the odd one out, John. When we were kids you were the most...normal, I guess you'd say, of all of us. You were hyper, you talked about every movie you saw as if it was the most unironically awesome thing ever, you were always wanting to go on adventures and you were unfailingly idealistic. Then there was me: sarcastic and moody. Obsessed with the macabre and thinking I was God's gift to psychiatrists. There was Dave, who spent his time trying to deal the subject of abstract comedy and trying very hard to look like he wasn't trying to be cool. And of course Jade, who was raised by dog on a tropical island. By herself."
"Well..."
"And yet, look at us. We've, all three of us, completely fallen into the most stereotypical teenage tropes out there. I suppose I just...grew out of being mature? Or well, precocious, I suppose you'd say. I just sort of embraced the wild lifestyle expected of my age-group. You, though...you just moved right past it, didn't you? You're like the 22 year old college student who goes to a high school party and thinks 'ah, I remember when I was that young and stupid.'"
"Heh, well...I don't know about that..."
"I think it's true. When I started out on the meteor I figured it was all going to be fascinating. Watching the trolls and their complex social structure. I became...enamored with the concept, really. I started trying to figure out everything about their social dynamics and as I was drawn further and further into it things just got crazier and crazier. At first...I loved it, but after a while I began to realize that...well...it was all kind of stupid and needlessly complicated. What I originally assumed to be an intricate and alien social system was really just the most typical high school drama shenanigans ever, only arranged in such a way as to be as perpetually unhealthy and chaotic as possible. Really, their whole system of romance was always pretty close to ours. It's just they add these stupid little rules to rig the system to produce as much drama and upheaval as possible."
"I always said troll romance was weird."
"It's not so much weird as just...kind of ultimately dumb. I think they unknowingly fixed a lot of the inherent problems when they made us. Humans, I mean. As it stands, though, the last three years contained a lot of unnecessary drama that could have easily been avoided if we weren't a bunch of hormonal teenagers. But I suppose...that's just to be expected at this age." Rose sighed again.
They reached a door to a room at which point John stopped.
"This is...uh...this is my room," John said. Rose gave him an inquisitive smirk, and then proceeded inside without invitation. The room itself was rather sparse. There was a desk in one corner with a computer on it. A couch shoved up against the far wall with a small bookcase crammed next to it and a door leading off to what looked like an even smaller room to the side. On a small table in the opposite corner to the desk sat an old fashioned record player. Rose looked around the room for a second, taking in the few posters there salvaged from John's old room.
"I figured you would have wanted to stay in your house..." She said, idly.
"Well, my house down there is kind of mess, really. Covered in oil and all that. I liked being up here...especially in that last year. I felt...closer to the destination out here..." John answered, sounding a bit distant. Rose didn't respond to this, but she continued to look around the room as though everything interested her. Her eyes fell upon the record player.
"Wow, John...this is...kind of old school, isn't it?"
"Heh...yeah, I guess. I found it in my dad's stuff." John was rubbing the back of his neck again. Rose picked up the needle on the record player.
"I guess this would be the antiquated equivalent to pilfering one's digital music device to see what they have on it..." She let the needle fall on the LP currently in the record player. The sounds of jazzy brass began to play from the speakers. John removed his suit jacket and threw it on to the couch, leaving his vest uncovered on top of his white shirt. He rolled up his sleeves just as Frank Sinatra, his voice full of characteristic bravado and swagger, began the first verse of "The Way You Look Tonight."
John walked over to Rose, who was still staring at the old-timey musical device looking highly amused. He held his hand out to her. She looked at it for a second and then grinned as she took it. John pulled her in close, putting his hand on her hip, the other keeping their clasped hands together. The two began to slowly sway in time to the music.
"You know...I used to think my Dad was kind of lame for listening to stuff like this. I'd look at his pictures of Bing Crosby and stuff and I'd be like 'who's this douchebag?'" Rose smiled. "But the more I looked at Dad's old stuff, I realized they were actually pretty cool guys."
"They certainly knew how to make fedoras fashionable, at least," Rose offered.
"Heh, yeah. Anyway, I started going through Dad's stuff a lot. And when I did, I think I finally started to get a lot of things he was trying to tell me when I was growing up. It...just kind of sucks that I can't really tell him about it now."
Rose didn't seem to have anything to say to that. The two of them danced in silence for a little while longer.
"You know, John...you really have grown." Her eyes briefly flicked up to the several inches of height that now separated them. "And I don't just mean taller." She looked him square in the eyes. "It suits you."
John smiled at her, but didn't say anything.
"I'm...I'm kind of a mess, John," Rose said, her smile breaking for what seemed like the first time that evening. She couldn't quite meet his gaze.
"Nah...you're just a teenager. I remember when I was that young and stupid," John said. Rose giggled and then placed her head against his chest.
They continued to dance until the song finished. John let his arms fall. As he did so, Rose stumbled again and John had to put both his hands on her shoulders to steady her.
"I think you might need to lie down," He said, smiling. He put his arm around her shoulder and led her into the smaller adjoining room. Inside there was a bed, which took up most of the space, an indentation that looked a bit like a closet, and squishy looking chair facing the bed. Rose gave John a sidelong glance.
"A little forward, don't you think? What about waiting for the right 'moment?'" Her tone was playful.
"I think you're going to be disappointed," John said, managing to sound a little playful himself. He laid Rose down in his bed and pulled off her blue slippers. He then drew the covers around her, tucking her in.
"You're such a prude," she chuckled.
"I'm a gentleman," he corrected.
"An extremely old fashioned gentleman. Seriously why don't you just sew me up in the covers? We can go full colonial here."
"Well, while that sounds awesomely old-school, I think I'm just going to sit here on this chair instead," John said as he lowered himself into the seat.
"You're going to watch me sleep? Isn't that...a little creepy?"
"Someone has to make sure you don't go staggering off and heroically breaking your neck." Rose giggled slightly.
"My hero," she said in a tone of condescension that did not quite hide the layer of genuine feeling beneath it.
John loosened his tie and ran a hand through his hair, as he watched Rose settle in against her pillow...which really was his pillow, closing her eyes. He looked up at the ceiling and began to sing quietly, almost under his breath.
"Some day, when I'm awfully low. When the world is cold. I will feel a glow just thinking of you...And the way you look tonight."
"John..." Rose said, still lying down with her eyes closed, though her voice was playful again. "I didn't know you could sing." John chuckled and considered her for a moment.
"You never asked," he finally responded.
"Well...haven't you just become the enigmatic puzzle box? I'm going to have to get to know you all over again won't I?"
"I dunno. That might not be so bad," John said, casually.
"Hmm. Maybe not. Maybe not," Rose said, her voice trailing off. Eventually John heard her breathing become slow and even. He smiled, leaning his head back against the chair.
"Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm. And your cheeks so soft. There is nothing for me but to love you. And the way you look tonight."