Meg felt like she was looking at the poster boy for depression.

It was seven in the afternoon and he was still in bed. She assumed he would have at least gotten up, maybe done something, but all he did was roll over, occasionally open an eye, sigh heavily, and roll back asleep.

Dean and Sam said they were tired of trying to get him to do anything, that Cas had somewhat just become a tumor. A shrinking tumor, she mused.

"Hey," she said suddenly, sitting on the edge of his bed and tapping an uncovered leg. "You should do something."

"Do what?"

"I don't know, something other than lie your ass around."

"No."

She sighed. "Cas I came back for you."

"Why?" It was a question he often repeated, something that he had drilled in his head to reply with every other sentence. "Why should I not just die? I'm sure if the angels heard about that, they'd be livid."

"It wasn't your fault."

"Yes it was!" He was sitting up now, his hair in a mess and his blue eyes riled with anger. "I did the trials, I let Metatron trick me. And I caused the fall!"

"Castiel-"

"Go away!" Cas hissed, his movements so fast he almost didn't feel the blunt he gave to the side of her face. After Meg spat out the blood, Castiel felt his arm retract. He had never hit her, only shoved her back when they first met. He never imagined hurting her.

"Meg…I'm-"

Her eyes flicked to black, and with a quick sweep she had him pinned back down, teeth clenched.

"I crawled my ass back out here for you. I risked that same hot piece of ass for you, and damn it, Clarence; you blame so much shit on yourself it makes a demon look righteous. You sit here and bury yourself in your own grief and pain, well, tough, princess. Because believe it or not, that's life. That's your life. It doesn't matter what you did, Castiel," her face softened, and her eyes flicked back to normal. Getting up from him, she continued. "Because there are people who actually give a damn about you.

"And you never, ever, touch me like that again, or I will rip off your face."

When she finished, Castiel was looking at her with that stupid face, the one that was mixed with fear, sadness, and…

Wonder.

He was sitting up again, and she was expecting it to be so he could leave, but once he rose he fell against her chest.

"How?"

"How? How what?"

"How do I make it go away?"

She realized he was sobbing, the wetness from tears leaking on her top as he grabbed at her shoulders.

"It never goes away," she said as she ran a hand in his hair. "Trust me, you'll want it to. You'll beg for it to go and it never will. But you have to make it go away, anyway."

"I destroyed everything."

"And you'll destroy everything again," it was strange, how odd it was that he, former god, former angel of the Lord, was seeking advice from a demon. "It's a cycle."

"I want it to be over."

"I'm sorry, it wont ever be over."

He was losing it, she thought. He was broken, and falling apart, and he was losing it.

After a while he pulled off of her, not wanting to look at her. The whole idea was so fluffy, do domestic, that Meg was almost angry she didn't hate this entire thing. Damn heart.

"Castiel?"

He looked back up her, slowly, with tired eyes, and with a slow hand his grabbed her face.

She was expecting him to do something, like shrink away or fall back, but he kissed her, almost like how he did in Cowley's prison, but softer, gentler.

She fell into it, the human slowly touching her arms.

And then she decided to make the move.

"What-?" he broke their kiss, confused at her actions.

"You and I never got to uh, move that furniture around," she smirked. "Thought it was about time."

The met again and he let her strip him, the ex-angel pulling at her clothes as well.

When they were exposed, Meg shoved Cas down against the back of his bed, sitting on top him as he looked up at her with confusion.

He was about to say something but she silenced him, feeling his lips go from muffled words to accepting her fully.

She showed Castiel the way, and he was obeying her silent orders with quiet ease.

He never imagined sex like this but he was loving it, loving how she felt atop him, loving how she ground their hips together, and how it felt when she left long scratch marks down his chest.

Castiel had never been so moved by anything before.

When she let him come (a phrase he wasn't exactly comfortable with), Castiel was near exhaustion, his breathing ragged and his throat dry.

So this is what Dean, and every other human on the planet, enjoys so much.

"Damn, Clarence," she breathed. "You learn quick."

"It's a valuable asset," he yawned.

"You tired?"

"Humans sleep," he replied dryly.

Ignoring his snark comment, she reached over him to grab his left arm, pulling it so that he rolled on his side, Meg snuggling into his chest.

"What are you…"

"Don't expect this every time," she said softly. "I don't cuddle."

He shrugged, pulling her closer to him and burying his head into the back of her neck.

It was in a little over an hour she heard him snore; it wasn't something too loud, just enough that she could tell he was asleep.

She didn't mind him holding her, he did it just to the point where it was almost uncomfortable.

Maybe she could turn this little angel around, she thought as she ordered her body to sleep.

—

The next morning she woke to find the bed empty. She expected Castiel to stay with her, since he seemed to prefer her company. So when she muddled out of Cas's room (and stole a robe from Dean's adjacent), she found him sitting at the table in the kitchenette, talking with Sam and drinking coffee. It was the most alive she'd seen him since she tracked down where the boys were hiding up.

"Someone's in a fucking good mood today," she mused as she approached Castiel, running her hands through his messy hair and bending down to plant a kiss on his forehead.

"Good. You two…ah…And Cas…" Sam tried to form the words. "He left the room. That's….good."

"You gonna studder out your dick or are you gonna get me a coffee?" The demon asked as she casually took a seat in Cas's lap.

"We should tell Dean…" Castiel muttered as Sam got up, the larger human eyeing them both.

Meg considered it, before tearing Cas's gaze from Sam's to lock him in a kiss.

"Dean can wait a little longer," she purred. "It's not like we're such a tiny little secret."