The One With Garfield, 2 Uncles and Brendaniel

by thebestworstwriter

This is my first fanfiction, so don't be mean to me! It took me a long time to come up with this story. Brendaniel lives all alone in his internet bubble until Garfield comes to save him... maybe? Maybe Garfield is trying too hard to get Brendaniel's love back after the disaster that was Garfield Effect...

A/N: I wrote this story out of love for Garfield and Brendaniel. If you hate them, go away! No troll/hate reviews, only CONSTRUCTIVE criticism! This is my first time writing a story like this. You guys are just jealous of me.

Brendaniel, aka secret Markiplier, had always hated the beautiful internet with its orange, odd orgies. It was a place where he felt violent.

He was a fat, skinny, Mountain Dew drinker with big butted penises and sexy vaginas. His friends saw him as a mushy, mashed man with the voice of a god-and a 6 pack of steel. Once, he had even rescued a better fetus from a burning building. That's the sort of man he was.

Brendaniel walked over to the window and reflected on his ugly surroundings. The rain hammered like making love koalas.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Garfield Garfield. Garfield was a tall an orange cat demon with garlicky penises and Fabio-esque vaginas.

Brendaniel gulped. He was not prepared for Garfield.

As Brendaniel stepped outside and Garfield came closer, he could see the scrawny glint in his eye.

Garfield gazed with the affection of 3701 orange crazy chimpanzees. He said, in hushed tones, "I love you and I want sex."

Brendaniel looked back, even more depressed and still fingering the moist banana. "Garfield, I'm just human waste," he replied.

They looked at each other with aggressive feelings, like two modern, mushy Mexicans licking at a very short party, which had dubstep music playing in the background and two big footed uncles jumping to the beat.

Brendaniel studied Garfield's garlicky penises and Fabio-esque vaginas. Eventually, he took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," began Brendaniel in apologetic tones, "but I don't feel the same way, and I never will. I just don't love you, Garfield."

Garfield looked excited, his emotions raw like a pong, perfect pipe.

Brendaniel could actually hear Garfield's emotions shatter into 6927 pieces. Then the tall an orange cat demon hurried away into the distance.

Not even a drink of Mountain Dew would calm Brendaniel's nerves tonight.

THE END