A Thorki Christmas special!

Set within the timeline of "Crimson and green" in my "Colors of Asgard" series but written as a stand alone, Loki and Thor are only barely adults here and have only been engaging in non – brotherly activities for a few months.

Heart Shaped Stone

Midwinter settled on Asgard in a flurry of snow, chill winds sweeping down from the mountains and through the streets. Frost hung from the rooftops and balcony rails in shimmering streams and the palace glittered blue above it all. Asgard responded in kind to the snow and ice in roaring fireplaces behind every window, shining enchantments bedecking the trees and warmth to frighten away the frost that subtly frightened us all.

The royal family of Asgard were, in this respect no different from any other, mother and I had spent the afternoon hanging enchantments to light every window in the house with a rainbow of lights until the whole place shone both outside and in. We were sat by the main fire in the family quarters, conjuring golden animals in smoke through the flames when you and father came in hauling a tree that would reach the ceiling. You deposited it upright with a series of extremely manly grunts, suggesting I believe that mother and I were supposed to be impressed. We weren't –

"Am I to take it you boys have left that trail of snow across the whole house?" mother sighed, tolerantly.

"You know –" you said – "We have many people who could have done this for us –"

"What and deprive you both of the opportunity to show us how strong you are?" mother tsked at the very idea. You came over to join me by the fire and warm off in its glow –

"So –" you pushed me gently by way of greeting – "What have you been up to while we did all the hard work?"

"Did you not see? We made everything beautiful while you were dragging a tree around!"

"I'd like to see you drag a tree around!"

"You wouldn't you know."

"Loki? Why are there horses cavorting in the flames?"

"Well I was doing a whole array of animals before someone came to distract me!"

"Loki!" mother called – "Come and help me put the tree lights up!"

I grinned –

"Watch this!" I beamed at you, going over to the tree and between us mother and I cast lights upon the whole thing, shining silver, gold, green and red, with moving showers of white light swirling through the branches. I was not looking to you for approval of course, when I saw the shimmer of coloured lights reflected in your eyes.

_x_

The Midwinter Solstice that year went from tedious to good to better throughout the course of the day. By the time all the drawn out public celebrations were over it was already the evening and banquet time. I confess banquets left me somewhat cold, though no more so than watching you engage over enthusiastically in them. I could only spend so long around the table before tiring – indeed becoming uncomfortable - at the proximity of so many others and retreating for the shadows where I would watch you all from the lofty vantage point of a range of emotions. I was not yet too far gone into bitter superiority when you came to stand beside me, in the shade of a pillar.

"We begin to miss you at the table brother."

"You're a terrible liar Thor, always have been" I smiled – "Please, admit that if I was missed it was only even you that noticed." No, I never would admit that I was pleased that you had; that you would leave the company of much more exciting friends to join me – it stirred uncomfortable feelings that I would only ever express caustically.

"You should re-join us – come, eat!"

"Yes because the sight of you inhaling an entire ox would not put me off that plan entirely."

You sighed and nodded –

"I knew you'd say that –"

"Really? Down to the last "Inhaling an ox"?"

"Oh alright, not that specifically – I brought you sweets."

You thrust a dish of sugared fruits into my hands before I could object, you always did know my weaknesses.

"Thor! Really! If I had wanted –"

But you wore me down with that I know you better than you think Little Brother face and I gave you one last faintly suspicious glance before – I admit – inhaling most of the dish full gleefully and handing you it back with one orange segment in.

"Your ability to share never ceases to overwhelm me" you sighed.

"It's your favourite. Anyway your ability to consume whole farmyards never ceases to overwhelm me."

"Loki!" You chided – "It's midwinter! Time to eat, drink, and make merry!"

"For you I thought that was all the time."

"Brother you are tiresome –" You sighed and then frowned to yourself, looking away from me and downwards –

"You are happy are you not brother? I – find myself – concerned" you said to the floor. I must have scowled, trying to work out how to answer that, it did occur to me for the first time, firstly that I had never considered it myself and also that nobody else had ever asked. My easiest response would have come from a dark corner of my head and replied – I am never happy, but it sounded as much of a lie to myself then as to say that I entirely was. The truth was I had been happier that year than ever before, but with the awareness of having what I wanted and loving it came the fear that I had so much to lose. I also suspected that you sought affirmation more than a complex truth.

"Do not be" I replied, hoping it would answer you without answering you. I silently slipped my hand into yours as we stood there and felt you squeeze it tightly before letting go as we had to.

"Come" you said – "I think it is time we can slip away now – mother and father will be wanting us for the purpose of gifts."

"You certainly do know how to make it sound other than exciting."

"Oh what? Does Loki like presents? Does that actually make you smile?"

"Shut up Thor. I am sure I won't like yours –"

"You wound me."

"Later". You looked up at me then as if to try and work out if I meant what you thought I meant - later I will scratch my nails so hard down your back that all you will know is me wounding you and how you love it. I did mean it and you could tell, I heard it in your low intake of breath and I smiled. I heard you growl softly and smirked as you pulled yourself together –

"Come on!"

_x_

By the time we appeared by the fireplace I was perfectly sugar high and expending all my energy on not being as excited as a small boy about midwinter. We were neither of us having any particular success in this area. Indeed you were worse than me, and had to go first, unwrapping all your presents while I looked down my nose at what was mostly an assortment of weaponry. You then did the same while I unwrapped what was mostly an assortment of books. You wrinkled your nose in disgust –

"Gods Loki, your presents are so boring!"

"I would rather have mine than be burdened with yours thank you very much!"

"Now boys!" Mother said – "You don't have to like each other's presents as long as you like your own!"

We behaved long enough to mumble our thanks and while our parents were handing each other their gifts I trust mine awkwardly at you while you did the same. I looked at the badly wrapped present you had given me with a raised eyebrow –

"Well. This is…..tiny."

"Yes well. You did not deserve anything else. Besides you can hardly talk – what is this?"

"Suppose you just unwrap it and insult it later?"

I smirked watching you attempt to gently unwrap the very tiny present, secretly scrunched up inside hoping you would not hate it. You frowned at first, not understanding –

"It's a – necklace? Brother are you insinuating something?" I rolled my eyes as you held the carved rune between two fingers –

"It's a battle charm, I made it – it should keep you safe. If I did it right you'll be practically invincible in a fight." Unfortunately mother chose this moment to pay attention and blow a great deal of my cover –

"That is fascinating –" she peered at it closely – "Loki – I've never seen this charm before – this is very powerful, wherever did you find it?"

I was horrified to feel my cheeks growing warm, I would have preferred it if you had hated it, but I could not fail to answer mother;

"Nidaviller" I muttered.

"You went all the way to the dwarven realms to get your brother a midwinter present?" Mother stopped just short of saying something appalling like "That's so sweet!" but I could hear it in her voice.

"You should be more careful" was father's contribution – "Those realms can be dangerous."

"I was fine" I lied, neglecting to mention my several brushes with death on that particular venture. You were looking at me with that close I just figured something out expression and I suddenly fervently wanted the ground to swallow me up before you realised that I was that desperate to not see you get hurt.

"Here –" I offered, seeing you fumble an attempt to tie it round your neck – "Let me –" It was dangerous ground to be on around our parents, feeling your hair tickle my fingers and your skin warm beneath them, but it was better than everyone noticing that I had done something nice.

"Now you open mine!" You grinned. I managed to unwrap yours easily, in spite of the mess you had made and the multiple attempts to get the paper to stick that had resulted in quite a sticky mess. I grumbled all the way;

"Hey!" You protested – "It took me hours to do that!"

"I bet it did" I rolled my eyes and unwrapped – a small grey stone in the shape of a heart with a small card accompanying it to inform me that stroking the stone would relieve me of stress and remind me that somebody loved me. Midgardian, of course; you had clearly been seduced by their advertising into thinking this was some strange form of Earth magic.

"I see" I said, smirking, almost chuckling – "I brave the outer realms for an enchantment to save your life and you get me a crummy Midguardian holiday souvenir?"

"Be glad I got you anything brat!" you retorted, though I could see your eyes nearly getting sad - "You hate it then?" you said, just two minutes later. I sighed –

"It's …nice – it's a very nice….piece of rock."

I slipped it into my pocket and never told you the rest. How centuries later, after New York, after everything had changed beyond repair, I sat in my cell and stroked that smooth heart shaped rock between my fingers. How it was worn down out of shape and the size of a pebble from centuries of my nervous fingers, years of lying with it in my hand beneath the pillow at night, comforting in its smooth familiarity. How it nestled into my palm as I sat staring at the four walls left to me, reminding me that somebody had loved me and how, when I died I could see before I went, the threadbare cord around your neck where my battle charm still lay.

_x_

Again this was not meant to be first person. Gonna run off into the night now yelling "Loki you thief! Come back here with my narrative!"

I may write a festive M rated second chapter, with firelight, midwinter tree and frickle frackle if anyone is interested? (I may also do it if nobody is!)