Hello everyone! I decided to write a little humor fiction for the SSB universe. Surprisingly, it's going by pretty fast, though you The Royal Ball fans need to quit complaining that I'm taking so long to update. I just got my original update back and I'm cleaning it up after it was gone for four months. Anyway, enjoy the show as we find out what happens when the SSB universe mixes with people from Final Fantasy and Kingdom Hearts (Dear God, Sora should've been in Brawl).

Disclaimer (I've been real lax about this. Time to actually get serious about it): I do not own KH, FF, or SSB. If I did, people would talk in SSB, Sora and Kairi would be doin' some making out instead of hugging in the Castle that never was in KH, and Cloud would've wielded a much bigger sword, and Kefka would've won in FF.

Chapter 1: What? Newbies?

Master Hand went through his usual long process at work that day. He threw most applications to join the Super Smash Bros. Group in the trash. And he had fun doing it.

The most important part of the job was, after all, enjoying it.

He vaguely wondered what Psycho Hand was up to. Probably going off and dropping tons of Bob-ombs in Wario's closet again.

He came across a bunch of applications in a nice-sized envelope. The envelope was addressed from Square Enix. He read it as best he could due to Japanese handwriting and the fact that he was a hand with no eyes.

Sora, Cloud Strife, Sephiroth, Kefka Palazzo, Xemnas, Terra Branford, Roxas, Larxene, and Axel.

So, nine newcomers. Perfect. This oughta spice things up for the tournament in a few weeks.

They all came with DVDs that displayed their impressive fighting ability.

So he signed in the Approved box.

The next morning, at his usual daily announcements, he decided to break it to them gently.

"OK, so we're getting new fighters in time for the tournament." he said.

Nearly everyone groaned. Except Pikachu. He would often spam the Thunder attack and win, so it didn't matter to him.

"Why're we getting new guys right before the fight?" asked Snake.

"Shouldn't they come AFTER it so as to not spoil our chances?" asked Sonic.

"Your-a chances? At-a what? You think-a you can-a win at-a this-a tournament?" asked Wario.

"No. I'll just whoop your fat ass and be done with it." he said without hesitation.

Ness, Toon Link, Pokemon Trainer, and Lucas went "Oooohhhhh!" from a table owner. Wario flushed.

Mario was already jabbering about how his cousin Doctor Mario might be coming to fight.

"Your imaginary cousin, Mario?" asked Samus.

"I'm-a over here-a!" came Wario's indignant yell.

Luigi looked at Link and they both let out a collective sigh.

Zelda and Peach were busy talking about girl stuff, and didn't notice anyone talking about the new people.

Meta Knight and Kirby just shrugged and continued slicing up or swallowing King DeDeDe's Waddle-Dees.

Ganondorf grinned at the mention and pounded his fist into his hand.

"It will be my pleasure to eliminate them." he said.

"Yeah, eliminate their chances of losing!" came the call from Sonic again.

Ganondorf teared up, then ran from the room, bawling.

"Sonic, go apologize." said Master Hand.

"Why? He set himself up."

"Just do it."

Sonic groaned. "Fine."

Marth, Roy, and Ike just continued eating their morning Smash-Os and said nothing.

Jigglypuff was getting annoyed. She jumped up and started singing. Everyone started getting drowsy.

Master Hand quickly grabbed her and threw her into the closet. Coincidentaly, it happened to be Wario's. And coincidentaly, it was filled with Bob-Ombs. But he didn't care. He just shut the door and let the fireworks start.

"Now, as I was saying, we're gonna have to try to make them feel welcome."

"This registration of their is quite untimely. Why not wait until after the tournament's over?" asked Wolf.

"Because then they won't be able to familiarize themselves with you. This way, they all get recon of your fighting abilities."

"I never got any recon." whined Sonic.

"That's cause you spent all your time on your iPod when Snake was in his box, watching Mario, Kirby, Pikachu, and Link duke it out." said Fox.

"But if I did go, I wouldn't be able to watch. Snake'd just've made me look out the back."

Snake chuckled as he lit a cigarette.

"Heh heh, hey, welcome to life buddy." he said.

Just then, DeDeDe pulled out a spike bomb, and not realizing Snake was holding a lighter behind him, tossed it back.

BOOM!

The room exploded.

And that's how breakfast ended.

R&R please.