Authoress's Note: This is a real event that happened to me when I was playing Toontown. Dana and Miss Lily Precioustoon are real Toons. So is Winky Dizzypop, my Toon :) This is also my first Toontown fic.
"Let's go fight the Vice President," Winky Dizzypop meowed cheerfully to her friend.
"Wait a minute."
The green cat nodded patiently; it was an impulsive idea, after all. She quickly checked their Laff Meters to make sure they were ready; hers read 52/52. Her friend's read 48/48.
Good. Everyone was happy.
The yellow duck across from her checked the Shticker Book for a moment, then looked up with a sad face.
"Sorry," Dana said, "I need more merits."
Winky frowned slightly. She had been planning to just run into the headquarters, stay in the elevator with 7 other Toons (which usually took about an hour, so she had to go early), and force the VP off the roof, scoring a promotion and rescuing a captive Toon.
Though the green cat didn't like to admit it, she'd never done any of the above. Yet.
But this was her friend. And friends helped friends, no matter what.
"Okay. Let's go in the Factory," she cried, and started off. Dana's voice stopped her.
"Let's wait for my friend," she quacked. Then she whispered something Winky couldn't make out.
Hmm, another Toon to help. That'd make things easier when they went in the Factory!
"No problem," the cat replied with a smile. They went to the sidewalk and waited.
In seconds, a black hole appeared randomly on a patch of grass. With a squelch and a pop, a periwinkle cat jumped out. The Laff Meter on her dress read 42/42; she was at full happiness.
"Hi, Dana," she mewed with a wave.
Winky and Dana smiled and waved back. Dana spoke.
"Hi, Miss Lily Precioustoon! What's up?"
The newcomer jumped with happiness.
"I'm ready! Let's go!"
As the two cats and one duck raced into the Sellbot HQ entrance doors, Miss Lily grinned.
"I need more Merits too."
The Sellbot Headquarters was just as Winky remembered it: dark, gray, and crawling with Cogs. The three Toons ran like they were in a marathon: side-by-side, ducking and dodging any approaching Cogs.
Lily Precioustoon stopped at the giant pit in the middle of the courtyard; it seemed she had an overwhelming urge to jump in.
Winky and Dana grinned and walked over to her. Dana stood in front of her face and waved, snapping her out of her daze.
"Hurry! Any longer and you'll turn into a Cog," she joked. "This way."
Dana ran off to the right and through the Factory doors, with Winky and Lily not far behind.
As they entered, Cogs swarmed around them. However, they didn't attack. Most were minding their own business, and the few that did notice them were engaged in combat with other Toons.
Winky, Dana, and Lily ran towards the front elevator and paused.
"One more?" They asked in unison. It was generally a good rule of thumb to have the maximum of four toons when entering a Cog building (or in this case a Factory). The Cog Bosses, of course, were the exception.
The three Toons thought about it for a moment, and then shook their heads.
"I'm ready," Winky said confidently.
"Me too," Miss Lily added.
"We can do this!" Dana cried with a quack.
The three friends smiled at each other and strode in the elevator. The seconds counted down.
"3…" Winky started.
"2…" Dana continued.
"1!" Lily finished.
"Toons of the world, unite," they cried as the doors slammed shut.
The doors opened with a ding and the Toons found themselves in a drab, nondescript room with a big red button in the middle of the floor. On the other side was a firmly locked door.
"Step on the switch," Lily piped up with a mew.
"You don't say," Dana quacked good-naturedly.
Winky ran up to the switch and stepped on it; it glowed green. The door's locks shifted to let them pass.
Her friends joined her at the door; its automatic mechanism activated. They swung open with the sound of whirling gears. The Toons rushed in, around the corner, and were met by three Cogs.
"I'm in the mood to drop some Toons," a Name Dropper intoned mechanically. Miss Lily groaned at the Cog's idea of a joke, then stepped forward. The first battle had begun.
Winky and Dana moved to join the fight.
"Hi everybody," Winky called to the Cogs. She was certain they wouldn't be here much longer.
The three Toons surveyed their opponents. The two Cold Callers flanking the Name Dropper were level three; the Name Dropper himself was level five.
"Piece of cake," Dana said, a smile on her bill.
Miss Lily nodded. "What should we do," she asked.
Winky Dizzypop thought for a moment.
"Let's use sound! Save your powerful Gags," she added.
"Okay," Lily and Dana said. After considering, they all brought out a Bugle, a third-level Gag.
They three Toons leaned back and blew; the instrument played a military song often used for getting up at 3 AM.
The attack was a success. The Cogs reeled back from the sound waves. The two Cold Callers' health lights were flashing red. They straightened their ties, leaned forward, and exploded. The Name Dropper's health was in orange.
"One more," Miss Lily Precioustoon taunted.
"Bring it on," Winky cried, hissing for added effect.
"We can do this," Dana remarked with a smile.
The smile was gone from her face as the Name Dropper attacked.
"Aren't I charming," he sneered. He whipped out a stick with a cartoonish, grinning mouth attached to it and leveled it at Dana. A white ring of pain enveloped her as the duck lost 6 Laff points.
"Hey," Dana quacked angrily, baring her nonexistent teeth.
Winky and Lily joined her and hissed at the Cog. The machine grinned.
"No worries," Winky said confidently. "Let's use…um…"
"Let's use Squirt," Lily supplied.
"You are a genius!" Dana quacked; the periwinkle cat blushed.
The Toons whipped out portable seltzer bottles; where the liquid inside came from and how it was refilled was still a mystery. They pressed the handle in unison.
Three streams of carbonated water shot out of the bottles and hit the Name Dropper squarely in the chest. He only had time to dust off the sleeves of his suit before exploding.
Winy Dizzypop, Dana, and Miss Lily Precioustoon launched into their victory dance. It was a spontaneous, yet necessary ritual that increased their experience. When they finished, they found themselves staring at another locked door.
Miss Lily smiled and stepped on a switch that was behind them; the doors clicked open.
"That was easy," Winky meowed with a cheery smile. "Let's go!"
Dana frowned slightly. "I need more Laff Points," she said, pointing at the meter attached to her shirt. It currently read 42/48.
"Let's use Toon-up," she finished, smiling hopefully at her friends. Toon-up was a must for exploring dangerous areas. It let Toons heal other Toons. They never worked out why Toons couldn't heal themselves, until they finally decided it was sort of like trying to tickle yourself. It just wasn't funny.
The two cats frowned.
"Sorry, I can't." Lily said sadly.
"Me too," Winky added, an apologetic smile creasing her face.
Dana sighed sadly, but soon perked up.
"No worries," she said with a smile. "We can do this!"
Her friends nodded; together the Toons strode through the door and into the Lobby hallway.
"This way," Winky said, running to her right. This way was the shortcut for Toons that didn't need many merits, or for those who didn't have time to spare.
The three Toons ran to the door; after a few grinding noises it slid open. They found themselves on a catwalk 50 feet in the air; in front of them was a door and what looked like a walking security camera. It shined a flashlight threateningly.
"A Goon," Lily muttered.
"Jump," Winky cried as the machine's light swept towards them.
Sadly, the Toons jumped into the light rather than away from it. The lights blinded and burned them; all three lost 3 Laff Points. Winky now had 49 Laff Points, and Lily and Dana both had 39.
"Ouch," Dana cried in pain. The other Toons frowned, wincing. In anger, Miss Lily jumped on the Goon. It clattered to the floor in a heap.
"Let's go!" Winky cried; all three ran into the door behind the crumpled machine.
They ran around the corner, moved forward a bit, and stopped short. It was the Goon Warehouse. About 25 Goons were there, searchlights pointing in every direction. And all three of the Toons knew that a single hit from a beam would cost them 10 Laff points.
"Uh oh," Dana quacked, worry filling her eyes.
Miss Lily Precioustoon backed away a bit. "I don't know about this!"
Winky Dizzypop turned to her friends and smiled.
"We can do this! Toons of the World, unite! Remember?"
The yellow duck and periwinkle cat's sad expressions changed to grins.
"Toons of the world, unite," Lily and Dana cried, high fiving each other. They turned to Winky.
"Let's go!" they cried in unison.
The Toons strode forward, straight into a searchlight.
"No!" Lily screamed, twitching in pain.
"Ouch," Dana cried, wincing as 10 Laff points were drained.
"We can do this," Winky said, forcing a smile despite the sudden rush of sadness. Her friends nodded, reassured by her confidence. They ran through the glare of the lights and up some stairs.
Four Cogs then met them; one was a Level 6 Two-Face, one was a level 6 Telemarketer, and the other two were level 5s. One of the Level 5s was a Telemarketer; the other was a Glad Hander.
There were switches behind the Cogs; one was red and the others were yellow. They controlled the doors that led to the Silo—where the Factory Foreman lay in wait.
"Prepare to face your doom," the Level 6 Two-Face taunted; the Toons groaned at the lousy pun.
"Bring it on," Winky cried, hissing. Inside, though, she was starting to get worried. None of them had Toon-Up, and her friends' Laff Points were 29. She was the highest at 39.
"Use powerful gags," she advised. Dana and Lily nodded grimly.
"Let's use Throw!" Dana quacked.
The three Toons reached into their Gag Bags and pulled out fruit pies.
"Go for the strongest Cog first," Lily added, aiming at the Level 6 Telemarketer. Winky and Dana agreed and leveled their pies at the robot.
"Catch," Winky meowed, flinging a pie. It hit the Cog squarely; he stepped back and attempted to wipe off the filling. The others threw their pies in quick succession, sending the Telemarketer reeling. He straightened up, leaned forward, and exploded.
Since the Toons had all attacked, it was the Cogs' turn now.
The Two-Face slyly stepped forward; in his iron hands he held a red telephone. "You have been disconnected," he stated, dialing a number, waiting, then slamming the phone down with a click.
It was never clear how such attacks drained Laff Points, but they did. Luckily, Dana jumped and the sadness didn't touch her.
"Bring it on," she quacked happily.
The second Telemarketer shifted towards the group, grinning.
"I'll let my fingers do the knocking," he taunted, flipping through a file cabinet of Rolodex. The papers flew towards Lily, but her reflexes came into play and she dodged.
"Missed me," she meowed in a singsong voice. The Cogs were annoyed.
"You have been rejected," the Glad Hander said with a grin, aiming a rubber stamp at the purple cat. The ink struck her for 3 Laff Points, leaving her with 26.
"Oof," Lily gasped, as if the air had been knocked out of her.
Dana and Winky quacked and hissed at the Cogs.
"Let's use Sound!" Dana decided.
Winky and Dana pulled out an Aaoogah, which sounded the way it was spelled. Lily whipped out a Bugle. All three Toons readied their instruments and blew.
The sound waves crashed into the Cogs one by one, threatening to shake them apart. For the Level 5s, they did. The Glad Hander and Telemarketer covered their metallic ears, shuddered, and shattered into a thousand gears.
Only the Two-Face remained; there was a scowl on both of his faces. This couldn't be good.
He leaned forward and brandished the same mouth-on-a-stick that the Name Dropper had used; he leveled it at Dana with a mechanical laugh.
Luckily, having been hit by the last Razzle Dazzle, Dana had a good idea of when it was going to reach her. As the ring of showy, glitzy light came, she dodged.
"Let's use Throw," Winky meowed, determined. They were going to win this!
She and her friends pulled out three fruit pies and hurled them at the Cog. They hit, covering the machine with crust and filling. And like the others before him, he exploded.
The Toons lapsed into their victory dance, with Winky giving a triumphant "We can do this!"
Dana and Miss Lily nodded, and when the dance was finished, they stepped on the red switch in unison. The Warehouse doors slid open, revealing an elevator behind them. However, there were still Goons patrolling.
"No problem," Dana said, and invited her friends to step on the other switches that lay around.
A few quick presses of buttons caused hydraulic presses to come down, crushing the patrolling Goons into a state beyond repair.
"Let's go," the Toons cried, racing into the elevator. It rose several stories, and finally stopped on the East Silo. Looking around, the Toons saw a locked door on the Center Silo, this one with two locks. Past that was the West Silo.
No problem. Defeat some Cogs on the East and West Silos, step on the switches, and defeat the Factory Foreman and his coworkers. They'd all done it before.
But never with our health so low, Winky though glumly. Pushing her sad thoughts aside, she turned to the cat and duck.
"Shall we go?"
Lily nodded. "But of course!"
Dana quacked a simple "Yes."
Without further ado, they raced forward and were met by three Cogs. They were all Level Six; one was a Mover and Shaker and the other two were Telemarketers.
"This a bad time? Good," a Telemarketer quipped.
"Let's use Throw," Winky decided. "Use your strongest Gags!"
The three toons pulled out the most powerful Gag in their Throw pocket so far. Winky pulled out a cream pie, while the others armed themselves with fruit pies. They took aim at the Mover and Shaker and threw.
Partly due to the Cream Pie, the throw Gags hit. (It was common knowledge that lesser gags worked better with higher gags, and were less likely to miss.) The sticky filling and sweet taste were too much for the robot and he exploded.
The Telemarketers were quite annoyed. One even looked a bit worried, for the Mover and Shaker was the only one of them that could hit all the Toons at once.
The Cog on the left stepped forward, a businessman's tie in hand. "You need to dress up before you go OUT," he stated, flinging the tie at Dana. The cloth wrapped around her neck, choking her. When she recovered, she'd lost 4 Laff Points, bringing her down to 25.
"Stop that," the duck quacked, "I need more Laff Points!"
Winky and Lily nodded, hissing at the robot. Then the second Telemarketer stepped forward.
"The management is not responsible for lost items," he smirked, flashing his hand inside Miss Lily's pocket and coming out with 1 Laff Point. Now she and Dana both had 25.
Relieved at the small Laff loss, Lily smiled. "Bring it on!"
Winky smiled. "I'm going to use Drop. I think you should choose Squirt."
Winky selected a large iron weight; the other Toons picked a seltzer bottle. They all aimed at the Telemarketer on the right.
The carbonated water attack was a success; the Cog stumbled back just in time to get hit by the iron weight. He stood up, dusted himself off, and blew up.
The remaining Telemarketer pulled out a cabinet of deadly Rolodex; luckily he flipped through them slowly enough to give Winky time to dodge. She grinned.
"One more?" Winky asked, planning to use the same strategy as before.
"Why not," Dana quacked.
"Yeah!" Lily said, excited.
She and Lily chose Squirt and Winky chose Drop.
Sadly, the Cog dodged the streams of water from the seltzer bottles. And when Winky hit the button for the weight to come down, it landed behind him instead of on him. The machine grinned.
"Hey!" Winky cried, angry that she'd wasted a Drop.
"Stop that," Miss Lily and Dana cried in unison.
The Telemarketer ignored them and whipped a tie at Lily, hitting her for 4 Laff points. The periwinkle cat winced in pain, seeing she only had 21 points left.
"I need more Laff points. I think you should choose Toon-Up!"
Winky sighed sadly. "Sorry, I can't."
Dana shook her head as well. "Me either!"
Lily nodded, her attention turning back to the Cog.
"Let's use Squirt!"
Lily and Dana used a seltzer bottle, like before; Winky whipped out a portable fire hose. (There was a rumor that the water in the hose had something to do with a whale tank.) The streams of water from the seltzer were joined by a blast from the hose; the Cog reeled back, leaned forward, and exploded in a shower of metal.
"Woo hoo!" Dana cried, leaping up in happiness.
"We can do this," Lily added, a smile on her face.
"Yeah," Winky said cheerfully. "Open the door and step on the switch," she said, gesturing to the door on the other end of the East Silo.
Her friends nodded and ran to the door; Lily opened it while Dana ran in to press the switch.
"Let's meet on the West Silo," Winky called, running across the metal bridge that connected the East one to the Center one. She stopped for a moment to look at the grey, cloud-choked sky, and then ran to the West Silo.
"Wait for us," Dana quacked, running with Lily to the Silo. Winky nodded and waited. When her friends arrived, she stepped forward and was greeted by four Cogs.
They were all Level 6; two were Mover and Shakers and the other two were Name Droppers. The first Mover and Shaker smirked. "Why are you tremoring in fear," he taunted.
"I'm not," Winky shot back. She looked to her friends for support, but they seemed nervous.
"I need more Laff points," Lily mewed, gazing at her Laff Meter. It read 21.
"Me too," Dana quacked, "I only have 25 points!"
Winky frowned sadly. "…Let's use Throw," she decided. "I'm going to use Sound."
Lily and Dana readied fruit pies, while Winky pulled out an Aaoogah. She blew into the instrument, sending all four Cogs reeling. This was followed up by two pies to a Mover and Shaker's face.
The robot shattered to pieces. One down, three to go.
The remaining Mover and Shaker had a wicked grin on his face. He raised a metal foot and stomped on the ground, hoping to knock them down for 6 Laff Points. But the Toons managed to jump in time and avoided the attack.
A Name Dropper shifted forward, pretended to confer with his fellow Cogs, and raised his hands. Bolts of pure Synergy moved across the floor towards the group, tripping Lily and Dana for 6 points of damage. By a stroke of luck, Winky dodged.
"We are in trouble," Lily gasped, pausing to hiss at the Cogs.
"Yes," Dana agreed.
"Let's use Sound," Winky cried; she and Dana whipped out Aaoogahs. Lily took out her Bugle. The three Toons blew into the Gags for all they were worth.
All three remaining Cogs exploded.
As they danced in victory, Dana sighed. "That was close! I only have 18 points left."
Lily sighed. "I only have 15 Laff! This can't be good…"
Winky smiled and tried to cheer them up.
"Just one more. And if we do leave, we're going down fighting!"
The yellow duck and periwinkle cat paused a moment, thinking, then slowly nodded.
"You're right. We'll stay and fight!"
Winky grinned.
"You open the door and hit the switch. Let's meet in the Center Silo Control Room."
As her friends ran off to the door, Winky ran back to the Center Silo. She checked her own Laff Points; the meter read 39. Her feline mind was racing. They can't survive long with their happiness so low…I have to do something!
And then Winky Dizzypop, the green cat with lighter green arms and aqua legs, became a heroine. I have the most Laff points, she thought. If anyone's going to cry today it'll be me.
"Winky! Wait for me," Lily cried, suddenly worried.
"What are you doing!?" Dana screeched, running after her.
Ignoring her friends' cries, Winky strode into the Central Control Room to take down the Foreman all by herself. She didn't expect to win; she merely hoped to do enough damage and buy enough time so Dana and Lily could get their Merits.
A Telemarketer, a Two-Face, a Mover and Shaker, and the dreaded Factory Foreman lay in wait for her. The Foreman was Level 7; the rest were level 6.
"Hi everybody," Winky said cheerfully. She then took out an Aaoogah and blew.
All four Cogs reeled back, but it didn't do nearly enough damage to destroy one. Angered, they attacked.
The Foreman went first, attacking Winky with a barrage of harsh words. The verbal jabs hurt her more than sharp objects ever could, and Winky found herself 7 Laff Points sadder, leaving her at 32.
She gritted her teeth and smiled. If it helped her friends, it was worth it.
The Mover and Shaker went next, attacking her with a literal Brain Storm. A rain cloud moved overhead and emptied confusing business phrases onto Winky's head. She lost 6 Laff Points, leaving her with 26.
"No problem," she breathed, bracing herself for the next attack.
The Two-Face stepped forward, a red phone in hand. He dialed a number and hung up immediately. Winky jumped, and the invisible wave of sadness missed.
Finally the Telemarketer shifted forward, reaching into her pocket and pulling out 1 Laff Point.
"Bring it on," Winky hissed, taking out a cream pie and hitting the Two-Face squarely. He shuddered, then broke into a pile of nuts and bolts.
The Foreman strode forward, then let out another set of harsh words. Winky cringed and covered her ears; they failed to penetrate and she felt no rush of sadness. Good.
The Mover and Shaker stepped forward, then stomped on the floor. Winky jumped, however, and the Tremor failed to strike her.
The Telemarketer was last; he attacked with a simple Pickpocket move that only cost her one Laff. She had 24 points of happiness left. Winky frowned.
"Hmm. If I didn't know better I'd say they were—"
The doors burst open and Dana and Miss Lily Precioustoon strode in.
"We're here! Bring it on," Dana quacked, snarling at the Cogs.
"Let's use Throw," Lily added, whipping out a fruit pie. Dana and Winky followed suit, and they threw the desserts at the Telemarketer. The pies hit their mark; he exploded in a burst of gears. Two left.
The Foreman strode forward, a gleam in its mechanical eyes. "Who's got the power now," it taunted, casting bolts of energy at the Toons' feet. All three of them tripped for 10 Laff Points of damage.
"Help," Dana cried.
Lily shivered, at a loss for words.
"Stop that," Winky cried, and made as if she was going to physically attack the heartless machines.
But the Mover and Shaker whipped away her thoughts with a Shake. This time it jumped into the air to attack, and the shockwaves that followed sent Dana sprawling; Lily and Winky managed to dodge.
The attack did 8 points of damage.
"N-No!!!" Dana cried, screaming as all traces of happiness left her. The terrible thoughts made her seem smaller and smaller, and to her horror she found she was actually shrinking. She was going back to the Playground…
"Help…plea—" were the last words Winky and Lily could hear; the duck had shrunk out of sight.
Winky turned to the remaining Cogs, fire burning in her eyes.
"I'm going to use Sound. You use Throw."
"Got it," Lily nodded, taking out a fruit pie. Winky took out her last Aaoogah and blew.
The Foreman and Mover reeled back; Lily threw the pie at the Mover and Shaker. It dusted itself off and exploded.
"One left…" Winky breathed, sighing in relief.
Her smile faded as the Foreman attacked. The Cog took out a golf club, a golf ball, and swung the club. The ball hit Lily for 8 points of damage, wiping her last Laffs away.
Lily screamed as the laughter was forced out; gloom and darkness replaced it. She whimpered in fear and pain, and as she looked around she felt herself shrinking.
She tried to come up with something to say, some last insult to the Cogs, but all that came out was a whispered "You stink!"
Then she was gone, leaving Winky to face the Foreman alone. Tears burned the green cat's eyes.
Everything I tried…It was all for nothing! They're sad because of me…because I couldn't heal them…It's all my fault! I didn't even want to come here anyway…
And as these thoughts worked their way into her brain, a new one entered her mind.
The Cogs must pay.
Winky stepped back and gritted her teeth, determined to finish what the three of them had started. She whipped out a cream pie and threw it at the Foreman with all her strength. It connected.
The Cog's health was red, but not flashing. It still had energy to attack.
The machine stepped back and launched another volley of words. Every one of them found its mark, striking the cat for 10 Laff points.
"P-please," Winky moaned, shielding her face, "s-stop…I can't take it…"
Four Laff points left. One more attack and she'd be sad.
Winky shook herself to clear her head.
As long as she had happiness left, she'd do her best to end this and beat them. It was the least she could do for her friends…
Winky Dizzypop rummaged in her Gag bag and took out the Fire Hose; she aimed it at the Cog.
This was it. The last attack.
"For Dana and Lily," she shouted, watching as the blast of water erupted from the hose.
It hit.
The Foreman twitched, shuddered, and exploded, raining gears.
At the Cog's demise, Winky spontaneously entered her victory dance. Though she was smiling, it was half-hearted. She cheered at her Gag experience being totaled, but it was a hollow cry that lasted only a second or two.
For her thoughts were filled with images of her friends, smiling at the beginning and getting sadder each fight …
"I need more Laff Points," they'd whispered.
And then… finally…
"Help…" Dana pleaded softly.
"You stink," Lily hissed.
An empty room save herself served to remind Winky of all that had happened.
"Next time," she vowed, "I'll take better care of my friends…"