Chapter one
It was one of those winter days when it's so cold that your nose turns red the moment you go outside. Everything was covered in powder-like snow. People had to wake up abnormally early so they could rescue their cars from under the snow and shovel the rest of it out of the driveway. The air was clear and somehow incredibly still, as if nothing was supposed to disturb the snow-covered world.
And yet, despite that unearthly peace, the world kept moving. People were in more of a hurry than normally. They rushed here and there without any visible destiny, all in great rush. The city's trees and windows were covered with twinkly lights, telling that Christmas was near.
Sesshoumaru watched all this from his office window. He hated it all. Absolutely everything. He didn't care if it was the snowy peace of the country or the hectic life of the city, Christmas, New Year or some other random day…it simply didn't matter. He hated it.
Just the thought of it all made him frown. The world outside that glass was strange to him. He had never understood it, and during the past year he had come to realize that he had never really wanted to. He could have learned to appreciate it, but he had never bothered to. He had simply silently disapproved it, thinking that things in his life could go his way, no matter what happened in that world where everyone else lived.
It was only now, after so long, that he realized that actually, he had just managed to set himself apart from everything and everyone else. Looking down on them had just made him…lonely.
He grimaced at the thought.
How could he be lonely?
It was pointless. Absolutely pointless.
He had made himself a brilliant career, built the family company bigger than it ever was when his dead father had run it, and he could get anything he wanted. He didn't even have to lift a finger to get people to do whatever he wanted.
Still, despite all that, one thing stayed the same. He was alone.
He had never bothered to find anyone. He had never cared. People were irrelevant. During his college days he had experimented a little, just to see what all the commotion was about, but he never really got it. The only thing he really had figured out was that he found women to be extremely annoying and downright repulsive. He preferred male company.
Yes, he had figured out that much, but that's it. The thought of trying to find a companion, a life partner, never really even crossed his mind. He thought about his studies, his goals, and the business he would take over one day. He had been content.
And then he had met him.
Sesshoumaru pressed his forehead against the cold glass and sighed. Everything had gone wrong after that.
Even after meeting that person he never thought about life with someone. He never put any though into it. They just somehow gravitated towards each other, until everything collapsed and he was alone again.
However, after he was alone, he didn't think of it that way. He simply shrugged his shoulders and continued to do his work the best way he could. He even forgot that person existed.
Until now.
Sesshoumaru had no idea why all this had come back to him so suddenly a few weeks earlier. When he thought about it now, after such long time had already passed, he felt like he had missed something. When he thought about his life, he felt like there was something more he could have done.
There was something missing.
He almost wished he could go back in time, back to that person and ask him. He had known. He had told him, but Sesshoumaru hadn't bothered to listen. And he had forgotten.
There was a knock on the door.
Sesshoumaru woke up from his thoughts and straightened up but kept looking outside. "Come in, Kagome."
A black haired woman with bright eyes and an easy smile walked in. She had a stack of papers under her left arm and a cup of black coffee in the other. "Excuse me, sir, but your next appointment is already waiting in the conference room one. They are a bit early. Here are the documents for the afternoon meeting and here is your morning coffee. I would also like to point out that you are still wearing the same suit as you were wearing yesterday and the day before that."
Sesshoumaru turned around and walked to his desk. He quickly scanned the first papers in the pile and took a sip from the coffee cup. During these couple of minutes Kagome stood completely still, tapping her shoe to the floor. When she didn't move after several more seconds, Sesshoumaru finally looked at her.
"What is it?"
"The suit, sir."
"What about it?"
"It's the same as yesterday. And the day before that", she explained again patiently.
"So?"
"You are starting to stink, not to mention that it is very inappropriate. I have told you this before, every three days to be exact."
"Oh. Well, I have an extra shirt, I can change it."
"No. You did that yesterday." When Sesshoumaru just kept staring at her with a blank stare, Kagome couldn't help but sigh despite her strict work ethic. "Sir, I hate to point this out once again, but appearance is important. I left you a new suit in the bathroom. Please change before the meeting and you could also take a shower. You have enough time. And I would also like to remind you that it is NOT good for your health to spend the nights in the office. I also expect you to eat lunch today." Then she swirled around and walked outside, her heels clacking to the floor as she went.
Sesshoumaru looked after her feeling more than a little irritated. Just because she was married to his brother didn't mean that she could start taking liberties when speaking to him!
Then again…
It really was time to change. He hadn't even realized he was wearing the same suit day after day. He didn't even remember that Kagome had said anything about it at any point before this.
How peculiar.
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Naraku's day started the same way it always did: he battled to get out of bed.
Having to wake up before noon was criminal.
When he finally got himself up, he dragged his feet to the bathroom and into the shower. Cold water is always unpleasant but it does wake you up, at least to some point. After taking care of his hygiene, he went to the kitchen, drank way too much coffee, got dressed and left for work, late, as usual.
When he got to the office, people were running around in circles like there was fire under their asses. Apparently he had forgotten something important. He couldn't really bring himself to care, though. He stood in the doorway and glanced around nonchalantly, it was somewhat amusing to see all those stuck up lawyers and their assistants panicking the way they did.
Then his own personal pain in the ass was by his side and his morning peace was finally ruined.
"Where the hell have you been?" Kagura snapped at him and pushed a coffee cup into his hand. She tapped her designer heel to the floor and curled her lips like she was a black widow about to bite someone.
Naraku flashed to her one of his most winning smiles. "Why, Kagura, you look absolutely beautiful today! How are you this morning?"
Her eyes narrowed and she almost hissed. "Don't you sweet talk me, scumbag. Have you completely forgotten what day it is?"
"Yes I have", Naraku admitted right away and tried to take a sip from his amazingly hot coffee.
"I knew it!"
"Then why did you bother asking?"
"Because I still have some hope left that you'll turn out to be a responsible adult."
"Hey, I tried that responsible thing once and it backfired bigtime. I'm done with that shit. And now…what is this fuss all about."
"They're preparing for that big meeting we have today. Our client is merging with that overgrown Shiro-corporation, and the deal is signed today. Any of this ring a bell?"
"Oh yeah, that thing that's caused us to work overtime for the past two months, right."
Kagura sighed. "Yes!"
"Oh, I hadn't forgotten about that", Naraku smirked and blew into his coffee to cool it down.
"You're infuriating. But seriously though, do you think you can handle this?"
"Handle what? This isn't that difficult of a case. Pretty straightforward, though the guys from Shiro-company have been pains in the ass." Naraku walked briskly toward his office and looked at his coffee cup with a rather mean look in his eyes. Why did it have to be so bloody hot?
"One guy, sweetie. One guy has been a pain in the ass. Naraku, don't tell me you haven't realized where we're going today", Kagura groaned looking more than a little pained.
"I already said that I remembered didn't I? Big, big client. So let's get to work. Ouch! Bloody hot!" He had very gracefully managed to burn his tongue with burning hot coffee.
Kagura grabbed his shoulder and pushed him into his office, closing the door behind them. She looked worried now.
"Seriously, woman, what the fuck is wrong with you today?" he sat on the corner of his desk and put the coffee on top of some papers that were probably important.
"Naraku, sweetie…"
"Uh-oh. Always bad when you start using endearments, you mean little bitch, you", he said with a pout and then grinned widely.
"I'm gonna ignore that. Listen to me now, would you! It's his company!" she said like she was talking about the destruction of mankind.
"Whose company?"
"Why do you have to be so slow today, huh?"
"Because I don't have a clue what you're talking about!" he finally snapped. "Get to the point already!"
"It's his company we're going today to have that meeting with. He owns it!"
"Who does?!"
Suddenly Kagura found the curtains to be very fascinating. "Sesshoumaru", she finally muttered quietly.
The cup that Naraku had just been raising to his lips dropped to the floor. The spilled coffee tainted the carpet. Neither of them noticed, though.
Naraku's eyes narrowed. "Sesshoumaru's? Are you sure?"
"Of course I am! Would I kid around about something like this? You should be aware of it too, by the way! I can't believe you haven't noticed! You of all people should know about this company!"
"Why the hell should I know anything about him? Besides, I've become very good at tuning out everything even remotely related to that person", Naraku almost spat. "Do you think he's going to be in that meeting?"
"Most likely. Usually he never misses anything. He has the whole company in a tight lease. He checks and rechecks everything. Makes me wonder when he sleeps…"
"He's one of those people who don't need that much sleep. I should know, spent enough nights with him", he sighed and stood up. "Why the fuck didn't you stop me from arranging this meeting? It's too late to get anyone to cover for me now."
"I honestly thought you wouldn't be so stupid that you miss something this important. You should at least know the names of the owners of these companies we're dealing with!"
Naraku rolled his eyes at her. She should know him better by now. "I don't even remember our own client's name, darlin'…"
"Right… So do you think you'll be able to be cool in there?"
"Well why not. It's all in the past now. It won't get in the way of work."
He sat down on his chair and fixed his flaming gaze on Kagura. "Now, please get me the final brief of this case and try to get those guys outside to calm down. They're pissig me off. Then we can go."
"But don't you think that – "
"Kagura. That's enough."
"If you say so. I have a bad feeling about this, though…"
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It's amazing what a quick shower can do to you, Sesshoumaru thought as he put on a fresh suit. He hadn't noticed how weary he had been until he had stepped under the hot shower and had some of the stress washed away with the water. Apparently Kagome sometimes knew what she was talking about.
Of course, he could never tell that to her or she'd never shut up.
He studied his reflection in the big bathroom mirror. The suit was nice and smart. His posture was that of a proud, successful man who had made his own way in the world. But his face…
He hardy recognized himself anymore. He looked at least ten years older than he really was and he was already getting those horrible lines around his eyes that made him look just as hard and cold as his father had been. Perhaps he was, too.
He remember a book he read when he was a young boy. The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde. It said in that book that our face is the map of our life, every sin is visible in the lines we get.
How true that was.
"Sir?" Kagome called form the other side of the door. "It's time to go. They're already waiting for you."
"I'll be there in a minute", he said and took a one last look at the picture that was lying on the table in front of him. He let out a small sigh, picked up the picture and put it in his pocket.
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Days like these were nerve-wracking for her. Her boss wasn't the easiest man on the planet and it was hard to figure out what he wanted and needed before he himself knew it, so that everything would be ready when the right time came. However, that was her job and she was proud of it.
Unfortunately her job had become even more difficult lately. She wasn't entirely sure why. He seemed distracted and moodier than normal, though, in his case, it was hard to tell. Kagome, however, had been working with the man for quite some time already and she was very perspective when it came to these things.
It was very unusual for him to be distracted, especially when there was an important meeting coming up. She couldn't help but be worried. Her husband had told her not to worry and especially not to meddle into his personal business, but in her mind she wondered if there was something more she could do for him…
It wouldn't hurt to try at least, right?
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Sesshoumaru walked toward the conference room accompanied by a steady sound of heels clicking to the floor as Kagome followed him just like she always did. He wasn't sure if he liked it or not. It was good that he had such a loyal worker who actually knew what she was doing, but then again she was an annoying nag and married to his good-for-nothing brother.
"Sir, aren't you going to go in?" Kagome asked, tapping him on the shoulder. Apparently he had been standing behind the door for some time, completely lost in thought.
"Hmm", he harrumphed and stepped in. The quiet murmur in the room stopped as heads turned to see him. All except one.
These things always caught Sesshoumaru's attention. He wanted to be in total control of the situation right from the beginning, and that also meant that everyone else needed to know it too.
Fear. Respect.
He stood in the door way for a brief second, waiting for the last one to catch up with the rest. However, the insolent fool refused to realize he was in the room. Sesshoumaru felt his eyes narrow. The guy was either incredibly stupid or he was defying him on purpose.
And unfortunately someone in that room could not be stupid.
"Good morning. I hope I haven't kept you waiting…"Sesshoumaru said with a smooth and low voice. It's a nice little trick he learned very early on. If you speak quietly and with a low voice and slow pace, people are forced to listen. Emotional commotion is not suitable for business.
"Not at all. We only have our own jobs to return to. Not of any importance to you, I'd imagine", a voice snapped irritably.
Many of the people around the table flinched and the man Sesshoumaru was about to sign the contract with shot an angry look at the man who was still looking at his papers instead of Sesshoumaru.
A woman next to the man kicked him under the table, and he finally raised his head to glare at the woman.
Sesshoumaru felt something freezing wash over him. He struggled to keep his cool façade but it was harder than it usually was, and he was pretty sure there was something very close to panic swelling in his chest. He had no idea why it happened, he wasn't supposed to be able to react that way, but it did happen nonetheless and it freaked him out even more.
The reason for his panic didn't seem to be affected at all. He just turned his tea red eyes at him and smiled a cold smile that turned Sesshoumaru's stomach upside down.
"So, shall we begin then?" Naraku asked, turning his gaze away.
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Naraku was furious.
Sure, he had told Kagura that this would be just business. He would be okay with this.
He tried to convince himself of that, too, but the moment he saw the building and the sign of the Shiro-company, he knew he was in big trouble. He wasn't entirely sure why. He thought he had gotten over it a long time ago.
Apparently he had been wrong.
Just thinking about that man was able to make his blood boil. There was so much he wished he could say to the man. Well, shout and scream, to be exact. It would be hard to act purely business like.
He was determined to do so, though. He wouldn't let all that he had worked for go down the drain just because he was pissed as hell. He knew how to be professional. He knew how to deceive people.
He was a lawyer for crying out loud!
"Hey, are you sure you're all right?" Kagura whispered into his ear when their car pulled over in front of the company.
"Yeah. I'm fine. Stop fussing over me, would ya! Let's just get this over with so I don't have to see his ugly mug for too long."
"Sure. But if I were you, I'd try to wipe that murderous grimace off my face before we go in there."
"Fine!" he spat through gritted teeth. "Are secretaries allowed to talk to their superiors like that anyway?"
"I'm your friend, you asshole, and I'm allowed to be concerned, even if you didn't deserve it", Kagura answered calmly and got out of the car. She smoothed the nonexistent wrinkles off her skirt and cocked an eyebrow at him. "You coming?"
Naraku carefully fixed a nonchalant fuck-do-I-care expression on his face and got out of the car.
He was completely fine up until he was sitting in that bloody fucking conference room surrounded by people who lacked sense of humor and seemed to all have the nervous habit of tapping their pens to the table. The noise was incredibly annoying, and wasn't able to approve Naraku's mood at all. Not to mention that the guy sitting next to him hadn't showered in a week, the smell gave him away…
And then they waited, and every passing minute managed to irritate him even more.
That man had always been like that. He did whatever he liked and didn't care about other people at all. Here they were all waiting for his majesty to appear.
Naraku huffed. He sure as hell wouldn't go along with it. Even if it would prolong this god forsaken situation.
Finally he heard approaching footsteps. He lowered his head to stare at the papers. He sure as hell wouldn't be the first one to look at that bastard in the eye and see that there was no recognition.
Even so, he allowed his hair to fall to cover his face so he could take a look at the man when he opened the door. He wanted a moment to get used to seeing him before actually having to talk to him.
He hadn't changed that much. Still stoic, still cold, still incredibly gorgeous. There were some changes too, of course; a few lines around his eyes and mouth, probably because of too much work, his hair was longer and the look in his amber eyes had changed.
Naraku had loved those eyes once. They had been vibrant and curious. Cold, yes, but always curious. Now his eyes only looked tired. Like there was no life in them.
Except that tiny flash of irritation just now. "Good morning. I hope I haven't kept you waiting…" He said in his low voice and went straight to his seat at the end of the table without really bothering to see who he was in the room with.
Naraku felt his irritation flare up. He was so full of himself, acting all high and mighty, thinking he was better than everyone else.
"Not at all. We only have our own jobs to return to. Not of any importance to you, I'd imagine", Naraku heard himself snap suddenly. He really hadn't meant to say anything. He could feel the atmosphere in the room change immediately. Everyone was on the edge of their sets to begin with, and a comment like that was able to make the level of nervousness hit through the roof.
Kagura kicked him under the table, causing Naraku to raise his head so he could glare at her. After that he knew he couldn't avoid looking straight at him anymore. He turned his eyes to Sesshoumaru and smiled the best he could.
Then he shut himself off and concentrated on work.
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So yeah, Hello again everyone! I have a new story for you (obviously). And before you get all exasperated that I have another story to be lazy with, I tell you that this one is already finished, the last chapters only needing some crucial finishing touches, so I'll be posting next chapters somewhat regularly, most likely one chapter every week, two if I'm being extraordinarily nice.
Personally, I like this one. To a point. I'll probably hate it later but so far I've enjoyed it. Then again I enjoy everything that keeps me from opening books concerning tax law so what do I know. So far it's a bit angsty but it'll get funnier. I think.
Anyway, good to see you again and I hope you'll enjoy! Review pleaaase!
Love, Val