Disclaimer- I don't know if people still do this, but just in case: Do not be confused by the fact that I share the same birthday as Kishimoto; I do not own Naruto. I'd give an outlandish example of how I would have changed it if I had, but I prefer to rant in private as opposed to public.
Although I've followed Naruto for years, only a few times have I dared an attempt to delve into the world itself outside of roleplay forums. Since one shots seem to be my forte, a short one about my personal favorite character seems appropriate. As a little bit of a heads up, I'm going to say this now, but I did not plan this story. I just typed to see where it took me. I apologize for any spelling errors, as I'm not the type to read and review my own works. For example, last time I did this, something (I'm not sure what) replaced "Tsunade" with "Sundae" and "Shodai Hokage" with "Shoddier Homage". So... yeah. Hope that won't be an issue this time.
"No way..." he answered, releasing an exasperated sigh as his body slumped forward onto the counter. A pair of tired brown eyes stared in disbelief back at the feral dog like face (that only a mother could love) of the man who in one foul swoop just ruined his day.
"Why would I lie about this?" Kiba answered in a grunt. "Tell 'em, Akamaru!" he called out, head tilting towards the outside of the barbeque hut to his canine companion. One responsive call later and Kiba turned his gaze back towards the former Team Ten.
"You heard the man, Shikamaru. It's not wise to keep the Fifth waiting." Asuma interjected with a chuckle, no doubt overjoyed that, even if barely, it would lighten the load of his wallet which would soon be pried open to finance a celebratory meal in response for Chouji and Shikamaru's own successful completion of a B-Ranked mission.
A lamenting sigh blew forth from Shikamaru's mouth as he rose. Why was this always happening? The simple life of a cloud gazing, dog walking Genin seemed so far away these days. Those simpler times were gone now that he, in the past couple of years his classmates, had achieved the rank of Chuunin. What was the difference? He was dead tired, starving (albeit not nearly as much as his closest and oldest friend), yet was not allowed the simple reward of a break.
"I swear, I feel like I'm her favorite." A sarcastic remark, released in one final bout of complaining received chuckles of pity from Asuma and Chouji. Even Ino let out a few snickers. Maybe it was true. Tsunade always found one reason or another to call him away from whatever it was he was up to.
"Don't worry, Shikamaru! Akamaru and I will eat your share for you!" Kiba called out, as if the thought would comfort him. As he languidly threw his arm up in a wave, a slight smile rose to his fatigued features. Asuma wouldn't be getting the monetary break he thought. That was somewhat comforting.
Pushing through the door, Shikamaru stepped forward, hands slid down in his pockets. As his shoulders slumped, his head hanging lazily, his gaze drifted upwards as it so often did. 'Ah...' his mind began, 'A tea kettle...'
The thought floated through his mind, a reminder that he didn't even get to sip the tea he ordered. Why was it always him? He didn't ask to be a Chuunin. He won one fight those two and half years ago. It wasn't even in the actual tournament, either. That sound woman he defeated was just a preliminary opponent. When it came to the actual ordeal, surrounded by a crowd of the village's own forces, Lords and Ladies in high places from elsewhere, and the village's allies- he lost! Sure the show he put on was impressive, but when it came down to it, he was in a helpless position.
The memory irked at Shikamaru's mind as he silently sulked through the streets en route to the Hokage's office. No, it wasn't the fact that he was a Chuunin any longer- although upon further reflection, despite the fact that he had not come out victorious in the fight, even he could understand what qualities of his shown through that impressed so many and awarded him a promotion.
It was her. That loud, noisy, troublesome, irksome woman from the desert was what soured his mood. From time to time, she surfaced in his thoughts to tease and mock him. Hell, it was as if an apparition of the woman herself were the one who appeared, the taunts were so vivid.
The few times they had met had all ended with her on top. It all began with the Chuunin Exams. Although the time of the match ran on, notably due to his stalling for time, the few times they clashed were brief. She was like him.
From his perch beneath the tree, cooled by the shade of the arena's shadow, he watched her. She was cold. She was calculating. She was analytical, much like himself. If they were to duel it out on a turn by turn basis, she would be his equal. With each time he would tit, she would tat.
It was almost beautiful to watch her work. With each encounter he forced, his shadow bolting out from the shade as his plan formed, she matched it. Shikamaru felt as though he could see the calculations she ran in her head as within seconds she deduced the greatest distance his shadow could reach. Within no time, Temari had had Shikamaru's technique completely figured out.
Was her analytical ability anything particularly special? Not necessarily. Most experienced in their field could have been able to figure it out if given enough time. Yet, he still found himself impressed, if not annoyed with how she could so easily understand him.
In the end, what ultimately pulled the match in his favor was not that he was able to out analyze Temari. No, what really made Shikamaru shine was his ability of foresight. Not just one, not just two. Within minutes, he had accounted for several hundred steps ahead. Was he a genius? Shikamaru certainly didn't think so. It was just a game.
Yet, in the end, he ultimately lost. Not because of strategy. It wasn't experience that did him in. Rather, it was ability. With his limited strength, limited skill, limited chakra, no matter how far ahead he looked, what mattered was that he could not compete with her offensively. The match was Temari's from the get-go.
"Annoying woman..." Shikamaru grunted, shaking his head and dismissing thoughts of the sand woman. With his mother on his back and the Fifth keeping her eye on him, did he really need one more troublesome woman on his mind?
However, even in his own mind she was stubborn. Against his will, thoughts of Temari once again invaded his mind. 'Oh, yeah... The Sasuke debacle.' he grunted inwardly. Sasuke's retrieval was his first real mission. It was the first time Shikamaru had lead of anything.
There were plenty of excuses that could be found to explain why the ordeal went as it did. There merely weren't enough talented shinobi to work with. The opponent's abilities were outside of the realm of his accounting at the time. As time went on, there was less and less for him to work with. And most notably, Sasuke didn't want to be retrieved.
But Shikamaru knew these were excuses, not explanations as to why the mission failed as horribly as it did. No, it was his lack of preparedness. It was his lack of leadership. For once, his foresight was not able to rescue his team. If a single one of them had died, and several were close, team leader or not, Shikamaru would never have forgiven himself.
But what saved them? It was the timely arrival of the envoy from the Hidden Sand that rescued the retrieval unit. But what saved him? It was her, of course. Who else could it have been? While Chouji and Neji had defeated their own challengers on their own (and entering critical states as a result), Kiba and Akamaru found assistance in the form of Kankurou. Lee found a savior in the very man who had previously stolen the use of one of his arms and one of his legs.
Meanwhile, Shikamaru was rescued by the one person who would never let him live it down. As if materializing out of the very gust of wind that she used to separate the Sound witch from him, Temari appeared to him once more. A chide here and there for his requiring her assistance, it was the one time he was glad to see her.
Struggle as he did with all of his might, the woman Tayuya had proven to be too much for him to handle. Even if his foresight had worked, his strategy going off without a hitch, and the capture of her complete, the monstrous strength that she wielded was beyond his ability at the time. And if he couldn't do it, how could Temari?
But she did. Even with the intel he had on her abilities and her strengths, he was useless as the woman gave Tayuya no chance to demonstrate a single one. With another wave of the fan, the surrounding area of the forest was pressed to the ground with their opponent beneath it. What had he done? Kept the enemy company until help showed up.
With a cocky grin, he recalled, the sand woman demanded a compliment. It was the least he could do.
But his colossal failure was not the only occurrence that day that he knew she would never let him forget. It was much later on that a much more embarrassing sight fell upon her eyes.
"Ugh..." Shikamaru grunted, trying to stifle the nostalgic flood of reminiscence that drowned him as he approached the Hokage's tower.
Tears fell down his cheeks. His failure had almost cost five of his comrades their lives. Chouji was forced to swallow what was essentially poison in order to receive a power boost capable of dwarfing the man called Jirobou. Neji was brought to death's door from his battle to overcome his limits and defeat a far more powerful, far more experienced enemy. Kiba suffered debilitating wounds himself, not to mention the mental stress from what happened to Akamaru at the hands of the parasitic brothers.
Even Lee, who had shown up out of the blue to assist them not hours after the surgery to repair his limbs that almost killed him, might have died faced against that fellow Kimimaro. And then there was Naruto, who he sent on ahead of everyone in one final desperate attempt to call Sasuke back. Even he, who Shikamaru had come to respect as much more of a ninja than himself, had come back cradled by Kakashi.
And yet all that Shikamaru left with was a broken finger, which was done by his own hand.
The utter relief that washed over him when he was alerted that they would all survive broke the dams that held back his tears. Without a second thought, he cried for their safety in front of her, emotions going wild. She called him "Crybaby", but still she comforted him. The shame.
One more sigh broke free as his steps came to a halt at the foot of the tower. Why was she on his mind? She just wouldn't go away, despite his best efforts. Maybe whatever Tsunade had called him for would distract Shikamaru enough to erase the sand woman from his thoughts.
'Damn, now I'm even thankful for being called here. Women are ruining me...' he chuckled to himself as he pushed open the door.
As he once more lamented his fate and mentally longed for his days as a Genin, Shikamaru made the trip through the tower, stating his name as he entered the assignment room. What did she want? The suspense was killing him.
Yet, in an instant, even his mind emptied. A stunned expression found its way risen to his face. Shikamaru's jaw slacked, his eyes widened. Perhaps he looked as if he were in total horror?
Behind her desk, the Fifth Hokage raised an inquisitive brow.
"Wh-what is this..." Shikamaru asked hesitantly, his eyes not on Tsunade, not on the council she kept when giving out assignments, not even on his father who sat behind the conference table unexpectedly. Chances are he didn't even notice a single one of them.
"What's so surprising, Crybaby? Does my beauty have you stunned?" she asked, that mocking grin on her face. Her eyes pierced through him sharply, analyzing every inch of him and committing it all to memory.
"Shikamaru?" the Fifth called out hesitantly.
"Uh... yeah? Yes, ma'am?" he answered, taking a moment to recompose himself. Thoughts swimming in his head, his face returning to its passive stoic expression. Was it mere coincidence or had his thoughts unwittingly summoned her? No, no. That was ridiculous.
"I realize you've just returned from a mission, and you must be tired, however Temari here has arrived early in response to the upcoming Chuunin Exams. We haven't yet formally discussed who to collaborate with her yet, however." Tsunade began, her own bronze eyes falling to him with a strange twinkle in them.
What was that? Amusement? His eyes panned the room- Oh, his father was there. Each committee member had what appeared to be a subtle grin on their face, their eyes filled with their restrained laughter. Why did he have to be the Fifth's favorite?
"But a certain Crybaby came to mind, and I realized that it's been so long since we've caught up." Temari continued, similar features located throughout her own visage.
"So," Tsunade continued, "We've decided you, the person with whom she's most familiar, will suffice. As you know, this is serious business, so I don't need to tell you how imperative it is you two work well together."
"H-hold on, I-" Shikamaru began, cut off in an instant.
"That will be all. Dismissed." Tsunade finished, a grin fully flourished on her lips.
Was this Tsunade's way of playing a prank on him? Or was it the God's? Was it mere coincidence? Hell, it might have even been fate.
"Let's go, Crybaby. You can show me around to see how things have changed. Oh, and buy me some lunch. I had a long trip." Temari said with a grin, turning as she strolled through the exit.
'Why does it have to be her...' Shikamaru mentally questioned, his fatigue a subject of laughter to his Hokage.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah." he answered, head slumped as he followed.
"One yeah is enough!" came Temari's response.
Silently, reclined back in chair and apparently gone unnoticed, Shikaku watched. An expression of amusement arose to his face, yet there was something that separated his from those of everyone around him. Yes, nothing went past his experienced eyes. He saw it.
As the pair exited, a faint smile had adorned his son. After many years of complaints about troublesome women and questions to Shikaku about how he dealt living under his better half, it seemed his son finally understood.
'As troublesome as they are, we can't escape them. Not that we'd want to, right Shikamaru?'
It took a couple of hours to write, therefore it should take a couple of hours to read. Too wishful of thinking? Ah, well. I hope you enjoyed this dive of mine into the mind of Shikamaru during the time skip. If you were expecting more, I apologize, but this is just where my fingers took me when I first began typing last night. Thanks for reading, and stay thirsty.