Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's. If I did, everybody would live happily every after, the end. (But then again, that's what fanfiction is for, right?)
"Another, please." The shot glass bounced farther than Meredith had expected when she had imagined slamming it on the bar, which meant she was probably drunker than she meant to get. That was okay, though. This was her self proclaimed "Anything Goes" night, which was risky considering her history of getting drunk and letting her guard down, but Amy and Maggie were watching the kids and she wasn't scheduled for any surgeries tomorrow.
As if by magic, another tequila appeared on the counter before her eyes. Yes, she was definitely drunker than she had planned on getting. Meredith indicated rather nonverbally that she was ready for another tequila.
As the bartender complied, Meredith noticed a presence making its way directly toward her from the entrance of the bar. It took a couple of seconds and some hard blinks, but she finally recognized the figure-it was Alex and he was already wearing his worried face.
Turning back to the bar she said, "Hit me again, Joe," before slamming back her fourth (or was it her fifth?) shot.
Alex sat in the stool directly to the right of Meredith, shaking his head disapprovingly. "Mer, Joe hasn't worked here for a while-he's got a kid to worry about now, you know that."
She wrinkled her nose as a form of acknowledgement then admitted, "Yeah, I know, but I miss Joe, so Dave and I have an understanding. I buy drinks and call him Joe, and after three or four he doesn't bother correcting me anymore."
The bartender nodded, a patient look on his face. "Dude, it's true."
At this, Meredith laughed, grabbing somewhat unsuccessfully in the direction of Alex's arm. "Alex, he talks just like you used to!" She was giggling now, and it was pretty clear to Alex she was drunk, but, not one to rain on bright and shiney days, he smiled and patted her hand.
"Dude, it's true." Alex mimicked, smirking his old, cocky Alex side smirk.
"You used to be such an ass." Meredith declared, simultaneously waving for another drink.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." She affirmed, reaching for his beer. Apparently the tequila wasn't flowing fast enough. "You always pushed us away. You were always yelling things and snarling."
"Yeah." He agreed.
"But Alex? I'm glad. I was an ass too. And you never judged me, never tried to change me. I appreciated that. You didn't care if I was the diseased dirty ex-mistress, or the dark and twisty suicidal resident or the sad widow with the emotional baggage of a spanish soap opera. You were just always accepting. I like that about you. And I don't think you're an ass anymore, no matter what anyone says."
Alex smiled, shaking his head again. "You're not too bad yourself, Mer." She was definitely drunk. That was her thing though, and it was endearing to him. He certainly never expected to be friends with Meredith when they first met, but looking back on their time together, he couldn't imagine another person that would have kicked his ass into gear when he needed. Of all the people who had come and gone, she probably knew his vulnerable side more than anyone.
They sat in companionable silence for a little bit, taking turns sipping Alex's beer. The bar was filling up now, more people shuffled in and out, shedding and donning various rain gear and shaking out umbrella's near the front door. Most of the seats were filling up and Alex saw a few young residents from the hospital (none of them surgical, thankfully) eyeing the few open barstools greedily.
One glance at Meredith told him they would be here for a while, but that didn't mean they couldn't let the kids have their fun. Besides, if they were going to be here for a while, he wanted some lumbar support, and these barstools were definitely not the ticket for back pain relief.
"Come on, Mer, let's get a booth. Let the vultures have their turn."
Meredith nodded mutely and allowed Alex to direct (or, more accurately, drag) her to the only remaining booth, the one in the far corner near the emergency exit. With the Seattle Grace Mercy Death plague which seemed to constantly infect Alex and Meredith, he found it grimly appropriate and though Meredith was tipsy, the smirk on her face told him that the irony wasn't lost on her either.
He made sure she made it into her side of the booth without incident before sliding into his own place across from her. He studied her closely and she stared back.
"Alex, I may be over the legal blood alcohol limit for driving-"
"I'll say." Alex huffed humorously, interrupting.
"But I am not blind. You're staring and searching with your beady little demon spawn eyes." Alex grinned widely for a second at the nickname. "Seriously, Alex."
"Seriously?"
"Seriously." They both chuckled quietly. Tipsy at Joe's and tossing banter back and forth like a game of table tennis, they could almost be back in their residency again.
Meredith broke Alex out of his reverie with a quick jab of her long, slender fingers. "Seriously."
"Mer…" Alex sighed. "Are you sure you want to get into this?" He certainly did not want to start a conversation that was going to end up bringing her any pain. The woman had suffered enough, and frankly so had he. When he was with Meredith, his first instinct was to comfort, protect. Which, if he really thought about it, was crap. The girl had more armor and bigger balls than most of the people he'd ever met.
"To hell with that, Meredith. Just enjoy your beer." He shoved his beer in her direction, trying to avoid the subject. Meredith shook her head, trying to sober up a bit. Alex and she had a long, confusing past (then again, the same could be said for her and almost all of the surgical staff at Grey Sloan) but Alex was her person now. And if he had something on his mind, it was her duty, no matter how tequila addled her brain was at the moment, to make him talk. Which was funny, considering that neither had a very strong track record of talking or facing problems head on.
Meredith remembered back to a day early on in their internship, on Thanksgiving Day when Alex had said, "I tell you something, you tell me something." It was just as true now as it was then.
"Okay. I gotta ask you something. But if I ask you this, you gotta promise not to put me in psych on the 'risk to self list'." Meredith blurted, falling back into the jumpy, slightly rambling sentences which used to be her trademark.
Alex was immediately on high alert. "Mer-" He started in, but was cut off by a flurry of slightly erratic but painfully accurate punches. "Ow, Meredith, cut it out!" He tried to keep his voice low but insistent. Her tiny, effectual fists continued to rain blows until he relented, "Okay, fine, I promise. Whatever."
"Okay." Meredith let out a slow breath, then jumped in. "It's just...Do you ever wish you had died first? Like, before everybody else? Before George and Lexie and Mark and Derek?" She looked up suddenly, wide eyes locking with his as she heard what she was saying. "I mean, I don't want to die. I just don't want-"
"To be the last one standing." Alex finished with an understanding in his eyes that was clear and calming. They watched one another for a silent moment. All the noise- the laughing, yelling, clinking glass and cheering- was unimportant in that moment. All the conversations and dancing couples, all the flirting and fighting was gone and it was just the two well weathered friends.
"I just don't want to be the last one standing." She echoed in agreement. "I don't want to live through everybody else dying."
"With your history-" He stopped himself, internally cursing his loose tongue, but Meredith had caught on and finished his sentence for him, "-I might just die alone. Yeah, I know."
Alex patted Meredith on the arm, sighing heavily. "Look, if it comes down to just you and me, I promise I'll kill you off first. Overdose of morphine. Then you won't have to watch me die. Okay?"
"Promise?"
"Promise."
She smiled, chuckling silently, shaking her head. "You're a good friend."
"Hell yeah, I am." He nudged her arm, and she nudged his arm back.
"Your turn, Alex."
"I just worry about you, that's all. You know. Derek and Yang and Lexie are gone. And me and Jo, we're getting somewhere, you know? Really getting somewhere. And I'm glad-don't get me wrong. I love that girl. I love her. But I just… I feel some weird obligation to you. You've always been there for me, when Izzie and everybody hated me-when I failed my boards- and when Izzie was sick. All the messed up relationships with crazy chicks… You're the one messed up chick who hasn't gone crazy on me or left me yet. I just don't want to leave you behind."
It was Meredith's turn to rub Alex's arm. They had been through a lot. A lot. More than she normally realized. She smiled. Alex Karev. Who would have thought that Alex Michael Karev would be her person? She certainly wouldn't have, back in the beginning, but now, she was just grateful it was him.
"Alex, I've got a village. We've both lost a lot of people. But we both have new people, more people. I have Maggie and Amy. Plus I still have Bailey and Webber and everybody. And you're not leaving leaving-are you?" The last question was desperate and accusatory.
"No. No, I definitely am not leaving."
"Then we'll be fine. We have each other and we have our village and we'll be okay. We will."
"Sure, we'll be okay."
The two sat in silence for a minute, having finished off the beer. Alex rubbed his arm, which had been the unfortunate victim of Meredith's attack earlier. He rubbed his arm ruefully, eying her vindictively. "Jesus, Mer, who taught you to punch?" Both Meredith and Alex laughed, and hailed the bartender for another round.
A/N: I have always loved Meredith and Alex. Never have I ever wanted them together, because, to me, their friendship is one of the most amazing things about Grey's Anatomy. And sure, I miss Christina and Derek and everybody, but I've always felt that they understood each other in the most deep, dark and twisty sort of way. I don't know, I've just always loved them and some of my favorite parts are when they are helping each other out, making each other feel better, talking each other down. So... yeah.
Anyway, the story turned out a little different than I thought it would, but I'm still fond of it. Alex and Mer (platonically) forever.