By Any Other Name
by Whiscash
pairing: Beppi the Clown/Djimmi the Great
notes: so I came across an interesting post suggesting what Beppi's real name could be recently~ :o (FFN won't let me link things, but feel free to PM me if you want the sauce!) I doubt this is canon, it's not even my firm headcanon yet, but I thought it was cute and fired up a couple vague ideas I've had kicking around, so yeah! thanks for reading, and as always I would love to hear your thoughts c:
(also srsly whose soul do I gotta sell to get Djimmi a character tag already ;w; )
Beppi didn't know why, but just saying that name made him feel...naked.
Not that that was anything he usually had a problem with around Djimmi, but this was different. He'd spent so long - not hiding, but polishing his fun, shiny surface to perfection, and now he could almost feel it peeling away, threatening to expose the much less entertaining, almost shamefully mundane reality. Plenty had wondered before, but those searching eyes - they knew him too well, seeing straight through all of his many attempts to distract or evade that trickiest of questions:
If Beppi wasn't always Beppi, then who was he?
And whoever that was - was he enough?
"That's your name? That's what you've been hiding?" Djimmi inclined his head, the quirk of his brow bemused but not judgemental. "I must admit, I...did not foresee that."
"I know, I know, finally the shameful secret is out!" Beppi fell back on dramatics, clutching his heart and throwing an arm over his eyes. "What self-respecting clown could bear to wear such a terrible, ordinary, boring moniker?! I never wanted you to find out like this, but - but if you can no longer associate with me, I understand…"
"Beppi."
He only realised he was shaking when Djimmi gently removed his arm from his face, tilting Beppi's chin to look into his eyes - the great Djimmi, magical and wonderful in every possible way, who could be with any of the other magical, wonderful beings in Inkwell. " Charles. You didn't really think this would change anything, did you? That it matters to me in the slightest what your name is, or what colour your face is, or how large you can inflate it?"
The sincerity and tenderness in those words made Beppi's own stick in his throat like taffy. "I - uh - well…"
"Never be ashamed of what you are," Djimmi told him, softly but firmly as he stroked a thumb over Beppi's cheek. "You know, I've always found human beings remarkably resilient, how much you all can accomplish with such limited lifespan and fragile bodies. Some for all the wrong reasons. But you - you could never be anything other than extraordinary. You bring people joy, you make this world brighter - not how many fancy tricks you can do or however many penguins you can juggle, you. Beppi, Charles, whoever or whatever you choose to be, not even the Devil himself could take that away from you. And I love you."
It hit like a cannonball, relief and gratitude and more feelings than Beppi even knew how to feel, like his heart exploding into confetti as years of barricaded bad thoughts filled his eyes - everything he wouldn't, couldn't let the world see for so long, but now he didn't feel afraid.
"Djimbooo, cut it out," he mock-whined, fanning his face and blinking as the tears spilled over, down the edges of his impossibly huge, goofy smile. "You're gonna smear all my makeup."
"Good." Djimmi grinned, mischief dancing across his features. "Then I can do this, too."
He swept Beppi off his feet into an inescapable bear hug, smothering every bit of exposed skin - cheeks, lips, nose, neck - with kisses until they were both generously smeared in red and white, silly and giggly and safe together. Beppi nuzzled his face into that perfect spot between Djimmi's neck and shoulder, and he rested his cheek against his head.
"No matter what else you are," he murmured, "you are mine. My Beppi. My Charles."
"Geeeez, quit saying it like that," Beppi half-laughed, half-groaned; Djimmi calling him by his birth name made him feel tingly inside, in a weird way that felt kinda wrong but also kinda nice. "Reminds me of my old pops. 'Charles, go and wash that mess off your face.' 'Charles, stop fooling around with those.' ' Charles, take that out of your mouth this instant.'"
"I suppose some things never change." Djimmi chuckled, a low, soothing vibration. "How about Charlie, then?"
He'd never liked being a Charles. There were already hundreds of Charleses in Inkwell, with their boring jobs and boring lives. From the minute he discovered how wonderful it felt to make someone laugh, he knew he had to be different; brighter, funnier, better. No matter what he had to sacrifice - his old name, his old life, even his old soul.
But then, he never thought he'd hear Djimmi say Charles like he said Beppi , with an equal repertoire of emotions - amused, exasperated, stern, teasing, pleading, loving - that made him think maybe, a Charles could be special. He did make folks happy, and he'd barely gotten started collecting all the laughs across the isles - but even if he only made one person smile like that, it'd be enough.
"Charlie's okay." Before Djimmi could reply, Beppi grabbed his cheeks, squishing them together in a comical pout. "Just - not out there, 'kay? I don't wanna ruin the magic for the kiddies just yet."
"Pbbbbtttffff," was the eloquent response, until he released Djimmi's irresistibly soft cheeks, giggling, and received a feather-light flick on the nose in retaliation. "Of course. Fortunately, preserving magic happens to be one of my specialties...among other things."
He was Charlie, he was Beppi, and now he was Djimmi's - and that, he thought, might just be enough.