Ok, this is my FIRST story ever on fanfiction.net so PLEASE review I really need to know if you all like my story or
not. You know what they say, criticism makes the aurthor! wait....who says that? I hope I didn't just make that up.
Anyway, heres the first chapter!
"What?!"
"what is Brad yelling about?" Jamie asked Bit as he popped a piece of popcorn in his mouth.
"I don't know, lets listen" Bit replied as he jumped off the couch and gestured for Jamie to follow
him as they headed in the kitchen where Brad was.
"I thought we were going to watch a movie!" Jamie complained as he followed Bit.
"shhhh" Bit whispered as they hid behind a counter.
"I told you not to get in anymore trouble!" Brad yelled in to the phone while glaring at the floor.
"Their making you come here!"
Bit threw Jamie a questioning glance.
Brad's face went soft, and his eyes were glazed over.
"yea, I know, I'm supposed to watch over you." Brad put his hand over his eyes.
He removed his hand and looked around.
"When are you coming? Tomorrow! No, its not a problem, your my little sister and I love you.
You could never be a burden on me.
Brad started to chuckle.
"Brad has a sister?" bit whispered to Jamie as they walked out of the kitchen.
"Yea, she was here a year before you came. Brad sent her off to a boarding school. He said there
was to much danger here, he didn't want her to get hurt."
"Thats all?"
"I'm not 100% sure,but I think one of the reasons was because she....I mean.....we....." Jamie
rambled
"Spit it out Jamie!"
Jamie let out a long sigh
"OK. About a month before she left, me and her were you know getting at the point where we are
a little more than friends. Just physical though. So one day when brad, doc, and leena left. She
came in my room and we started to makeout. I was just about to take off her shirt when."
Jamie paused. "Well, we were so into it that we didn't hear brad come in the room."
"So you were caught? right?"
"exactly. Brad went crazy and said that if I were to come near his little sister a gain he would
personally cut me up and feed me to a stray dog."
"ouch"
"yea, so I mad sure that I stayed clear of her. But the worst part was that she got mad at me, every
time she felt like 'messing' as hard as it was, I had to turn her down."
"What's her name?"
"Julia."
"what does she look like?" Bit said after a minute.
"one word..."Jamie paused. "breathtaking" he looked at Bit with eyebrows raised as he backed of
till he fell on the couch.
Bit plopped down next to Jamie.
'breathtaking eh? I hope Jamie isn't over exaggerating....'
Thats it! My first chapter! I am proud of myself. *kisses back of hand* Good job Joy! Yeah anyway don't forget to review
even if you don't like the story tell me so I can try to make it better.
not. You know what they say, criticism makes the aurthor! wait....who says that? I hope I didn't just make that up.
Anyway, heres the first chapter!
"What?!"
"what is Brad yelling about?" Jamie asked Bit as he popped a piece of popcorn in his mouth.
"I don't know, lets listen" Bit replied as he jumped off the couch and gestured for Jamie to follow
him as they headed in the kitchen where Brad was.
"I thought we were going to watch a movie!" Jamie complained as he followed Bit.
"shhhh" Bit whispered as they hid behind a counter.
"I told you not to get in anymore trouble!" Brad yelled in to the phone while glaring at the floor.
"Their making you come here!"
Bit threw Jamie a questioning glance.
Brad's face went soft, and his eyes were glazed over.
"yea, I know, I'm supposed to watch over you." Brad put his hand over his eyes.
He removed his hand and looked around.
"When are you coming? Tomorrow! No, its not a problem, your my little sister and I love you.
You could never be a burden on me.
Brad started to chuckle.
"Brad has a sister?" bit whispered to Jamie as they walked out of the kitchen.
"Yea, she was here a year before you came. Brad sent her off to a boarding school. He said there
was to much danger here, he didn't want her to get hurt."
"Thats all?"
"I'm not 100% sure,but I think one of the reasons was because she....I mean.....we....." Jamie
rambled
"Spit it out Jamie!"
Jamie let out a long sigh
"OK. About a month before she left, me and her were you know getting at the point where we are
a little more than friends. Just physical though. So one day when brad, doc, and leena left. She
came in my room and we started to makeout. I was just about to take off her shirt when."
Jamie paused. "Well, we were so into it that we didn't hear brad come in the room."
"So you were caught? right?"
"exactly. Brad went crazy and said that if I were to come near his little sister a gain he would
personally cut me up and feed me to a stray dog."
"ouch"
"yea, so I mad sure that I stayed clear of her. But the worst part was that she got mad at me, every
time she felt like 'messing' as hard as it was, I had to turn her down."
"What's her name?"
"Julia."
"what does she look like?" Bit said after a minute.
"one word..."Jamie paused. "breathtaking" he looked at Bit with eyebrows raised as he backed of
till he fell on the couch.
Bit plopped down next to Jamie.
'breathtaking eh? I hope Jamie isn't over exaggerating....'
Thats it! My first chapter! I am proud of myself. *kisses back of hand* Good job Joy! Yeah anyway don't forget to review
even if you don't like the story tell me so I can try to make it better.