Tonight you're mine, completely. You give your love so sweetly. Tonight the light of love is in your eyes. But will you love me tomorrow?
"Are you really going to marry Odette?" Rory asked him.
"That's the dynastic plan." He responded.
Logan awoke in a cold sweat to the same dream he had had every night for the past three and a half months. Momentarily disoriented, he was confused of his surroundings. Looking around he quickly realized that he was in a hotel room in central London. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was two am. Sighing he peeled the blankets back and walked over to the mini bar. He opened the door and grabbed a small bottle of scotch. Grabbing a glass he sat down in the armchair across from his bed and emptied the entire contents of the tiny bottle into his glass. Taking a big gulp, Logan exhaled a breath he didn't realize he had even been holding.
It had been the same dream, every night since he returned to London. The same haunting look, he had been forced to watch over and over, reliving his greatest regret. Why hadn't he said more? Why hadn't he said no? Why hadn't he suggested that he marry her instead? At the time he knew why. He was afraid. He had proposed to her once and she had turned him down, the thought of being rejected by her again would have been enough to end him. He barely survived the first rejection, the second would surely kill him. So instead, he took the coward's way out and gave her the vaguest of answers hoping she would be the one to make the next move, but she hadn't. He had hoped their night together would solidify what they had, but in the end it felt so final, it felt like goodbye. He knew he had to walk away, as much as it killed him, because it was what she wanted.
Taking another swig of his scotch he sighed, and wondered how exactly his life had become such a mess. He was engaged to a woman he didn't love out of a duty to a family that while they may have been related by blood, couldn't be any less of a family to him if they tried. This wasn't what he wanted, but at this point he was in too deep, there was no fixing this without tarnishing himself, his family, everything. Yet, the idea of going through with this made him feel sick, at the thought of it, he could feel his stomach starting to churn, running to the washroom he emptied the contents of his stomach into the toilet. Resting his head on his arm, he reached up and flushed the toilet. He sat there for a good five minutes before he got up to move. Looking at himself in the mirror, he saw his red eyes and tear stained cheeks. He told himself it was just from the vomiting, but he really wasn't sure.
Looking closer, he could see the bags under his eyes. He had been drowning himself in work since he had returned from New Hampshire in an effort to spend as little time at home as possible, as little time with Odette as possible. The thought of being in that space repulsed him, he knew that soon he was going to just have to suck it up and deal with being miserable for the rest of his life.
Returning to the bedroom he knew that sleep was going to elude him, instead he turned on the television and sat down on the bed. Flipping channels he soon stopped at an old concert from the 1970's. Soon the sounds of Roberta Flack were filling his ears.
Is this a lasting treasure? Or just a moment's pleasure? Can I believe the magic in your sighs?Will you still love me tomorrow? Tonight with words unspoken. You say that I'm the only one. But will the spell be broken? When the night meets the morning sun.
He loved this old song, this version especially. It was so beautiful, almost haunting. He thought back to that night in New Hampshire, and in that moment, he felt as if that song could have been written for no one except Rory and himself. His heart had been broken, for the second time that next morning, after Mr. Toad's wild ride. He knew they didn't need words, their connection was so strong that words were never needed, though this time, he thought, they should have been.
"Fuck," he muttered. "Why didn't I just say what I was thinking? Why am I such a goddamn coward?" He asked himself.
I could be happy right now he thought. Maybe, there was always that chance that she would have rejected him. But? Would it have been rejecting him? Or pushing him to the life she thought he deserved? He didn't know and the confusion was making his head start to spin again. He wished he hadn't been such a coward toward her, but it was too late, he was sure of it.
Thinking more about the days to come filled Logan with dread, none of this was even close to what he had wanted, what he had dreamed of. He couldn't imagine living the life that was laid out in front of him for the next two years, let alone the next fifty. It made him not even want to go on with living, because in reality he wouldn't be, he would be the shell of the man he once was, and he didn't think he could deal with that.
Taking the last swing of his scotch for liquid courage he knew what he had to do. Dressing in last night's clothes, he grabbed the complimentary pad of paper and pen and scribbled a note. He then stood walked to the door and only for a brief moment looked back. It was the coward's way out, but he didn't care, turning back he turned off the light and walked out of the hotel room, leaving nothing behind but the note and a single tuxedo hanging in the closet.
Two days later Rory Gilmore dragged herself out of bed and down into the kitchen of her grandparents house in Hartford. Grabbing a box of cereal she filled a bowl, added some milk and plunked herself down at the table to eat. Still half asleep, she grabbed the newspaper the maid her grandmother insisted on hiring for her had left out and her heart nearly stopped.
The headline of the paper read HUNTZBERGER HEIR MISSING.
Acutely alert now, Rory frantically read the accompanying article that said Logan had gone missing from his London hotel room on the eve of his wedding. No one knew where he was, all that had been left behind was his tuxedo and a note that said goodbye.
Leaping up from the table Rory ran to get her cell phone off the charger in the study and frantically dialed Logan's number. Straight to voicemail. Trying to fight the rising panic, she called again. Nothing. Tears were welling in her eyes and Rory could feel the panic attack coming on. Sliding down the wall Rory crumpled into a ball on the floor of her Grandfather's study and sobbed. What had happened? He wasn't? Was he? She couldn't bring herself to even think the words. She couldn't bear the thought, she couldn't lose him. Instinctively her hand reached out to touch the barely there bump that was growing her child. His child. She hadn't told him, hadn't spoken to him since that night in New Hampshire. It had been the end, she knew it, she told herself she couldn't upturn his life like that, but in reality she knew she just was too afraid to tell him. In frustration she threw her cell phone against the opposite wall and watched it smash. She should have told him, maybe he would be here with her now if she had.
She sat there for hours, unable to bring herself to move. The sun had since set, and she still sat there in darkness with tears still streaming down her cheeks. She knew she was going to need to move soon, it wasn't just her she was worrying about now, but her unborn child.
Startled out of her thoughts she heard the doorbell. Ignoring it she continued to sit and dwell on her thoughts. Hearing the bell again she nearly screamed in frustration, she didn't want to face anyone. Not right now.
The bell continued to ring, at almost a frantic pace and Rory knew whoever was at the door was not going to go away. Pulling herself up, she wiped the tears from her cheeks and marched toward the front door, ready to give whoever it was a piece of her mind.
Opening the door her heart almost stopped for the second time that day.
There, standing in front of her looking extremely worse for wear was one Logan Huntzberger.
Tears starting again, Rory sobbed as she latched herself to him and said "Oh my god. I thought you were…" trailing off Logan lifted up Rory's chin with two fingers and kissed her gently on the lips.
Stepping backwards into the entryway, Logan led Rory into the house and shut the door behind them.
"Hi" he said.
"Hi" she replied and slapped him across the face.
"What was that for?" he demanded
"Everyone thinks you're missing! Have you seen the news?" Rory said angrily
"I had to take some time to think. I left Odette." He told her.
"No shit." Rory snapped.
"Rory, what's the matter?" he asked her.
"I thought you were. Oh god…" She started crying again. "I thought you might be dead." she sobbed.
"Why on earth would you think that?" Logan asked.
"The newspaper, the newspaper said you disappeared the night before your wedding leaving nothing but a note that said goodbye." Rory sobbed.
"Rory, I did leave the night before my wedding, leaving a goodbye note. It said: It said it's over, goodbye."
"Well something got lost in translation somewhere, because the papers reported that the note just said goodbye." Rory said solemnly, trying to stop the stream of tears.
Logan sighed, "Well the papers were wrong."
"I see that" Rory told him with a smile peeking through her tears.
"I would have been here sooner but I took a day to clear my head, to figure out what I needed to do. I headed straight to Stars Hollow, but when I got there Lorelai told me you were here." Logan smiled at her.
"I came to tell you something I should have told you three and a half months ago." Logan told her.
"Oh?" Rory responded.
"Yeah." Logan smirked. "Screw the dynastic plan." He said as he leaned in to kiss her again.
Breaking back from the kiss, Rory grabbed Logan by the hand and led her upstairs to her bedroom. Kissing him again she led him back to her bed, pulling him down with her.
Reaching for the hem of Rory's shirt, Logan's hand brushed her stomach and his heart skipped a beat. He knew this woman's body inside and out, she hadn't seemed to gain any weight, but there was an unmistakable difference, unnoticeable to the naked eye, but there was definitely a slight curve to her stomach that hadn't been there before.
Breaking the kiss he sat up and looked at her.
"Rory, are you pregnant?" he asked, staring at her intently.
She bit her lip and looked away.
"Yeah, I am." She responded
"Is it? Is it mine?" He asked timidly.
"Whose else would it be?" She said, still not looking at him.
"Were you ever going to tell me?" He asked taking a breath and staring at the ceiling.
"I… I don't know." she said, still not looking at him.
"Why?" he asked her.
"I didn't know how. I didn't want to disrupt your life. I was afraid." Rory said, tears returning.
"Rory, this baby is half mine. Why on earth would you be afraid?" He demanded sounding frustrated.
"I don't know, that you would reject me and the baby, that you wouldn't want anything to do with me, with our baby, we had said goodbye. I didn't want to disrupt your life ." she whispered.
"Rory, I'm not going to lie to you here, I am incredibly hurt that you would keep this from me. I never could have have rejected you. I love you. I would have left sooner had I known." He told her.
"But that's the thing Logan, I couldn't ask you to give all that up. Don't you understand that? I love you, so I had to let you go." she told him.
"That makes no sense." Logan sighed.
"Love often doesn't make sense. And for what it's worth I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you" Rory told him taking his hand in hers.
They sat in silence for a few minutes holding each other's hands, with Rory rubbing her thumb back and forth across the back of Logan's hand.
"Hey Logan?" Rory said.
"Yeah?" he replied looking at her for the first time since his discovery.
"We're having a baby." She said and smiled at him.
"We're having a baby." he replied and smiled back. "But Rory," he paused, "this is going to be you and me, right? I need to know, that this is real this time. We're going to give it a real go, none of this what happens in vegas crap. You and me, together. For real."
"Yeah, this is it, there's no one else that makes me feel the way I feel when I'm with you." she smiled and pulled Logan back down to kiss her again.
I'd like to know if your love, is a love I can be sure of so tell me now and I won't ask again. Will you still love me tomorrow?