Things Alyssa Does When She's On Crack
1. Run up and down the street screaming, "I'm a teenage psychopath!"
2. Walk into the guys bathroom and cry, "Niener, niener, look at the wiener!!!"
3. Hang upside down till she gets a nose bleed
4. Lets her dog lick the blood off her face
5. Buy brand new Strawberry flavored condoms and stick then on every doorknob on her street
6. Strip down to her underwear then spray paint her entire body with glow in the dark paint.
7. Run down the street when its dark in her underwear (remember, she's glowing! Look at #6!)
8. Stare open mouth and wide eyed at melting ice
9. Draw fake stitches all over herself and say, "I'm emo like Jasper"
10. Pretend to cut herself and yell, "I don't care what people say about me!
11. Put a cat in the dryer to see if it will really explode
12. Put a dog collar on, clip the leash on and tie herself outside, barking at people and whining for them to 'pet her'
13. Tell Alice to fuck off, Jasper's hers
14. Scream shoot me. When someone says kapowie, yell, "OWWWWW FRENCH TOAST!!! I'M DEAD!!!
15. Tell Edward to kick her 'there'. When he does she wails, "OWW, MY FRENCH CADOODLES!!!!!