Prologue + Chapter 1

Prologue: Beautiful Remains—Black Veil Brides

Things were never supposed to be like this. South Park has always been crazy, but this…this wasn't right. I felt as though I couldn't breathe. Staring at his casket felt like I was staring at my own. Maybe I should have been. This was all my fault.

A warm hand slid into mine and when I glanced over, I was surprised to see Butters standing beside me.

I wanted to rip my hand away, tell him that I don't deserve his comfort. Because of me, his best friend was dead. I wanted to yell and make him understand, but he winked at me and squeezed my hand.

Chapter 1: End of Me—Apocalyptica

8 Months Ago—TWEEK TWEAK

I flicked the top of my Zippo open, snapped it shut, flipped it open again and shut it. Wash, rinse, repeat.

I was sitting on the bleachers during gym between Kyle—who had a doctor's note—and Bebe who was on her period for a miraculous third time since the wrestling unit began.

Me? I don't dress out with the other kids and was a permanent fixture on the bleachers. I already had all the gym credits I needed to graduate, so why bother?

Kyle was the one to end the silence between us.

"Bebe, you'd be better off telling the coach that you were pregnant." Kyle said, but his easy grin reminded Bebe that he was only teasing. His grin was oddly similar to the one his boyfriend always wore.

"Coach Laker didn't believe me when I said that the sophomores are using wrestling as an excuse to grope me. In fact, he said that I just didn't understand the full contact masterpiece that is wrestling." Bebe confided before staring at her hands dejectedly.

Bebe Stevens was a gorgeous and notoriously tough chick. Her blonde hair, blue eyes, and well…chest…led people to believe she was easy. The sad thing was that no one but our grade school class was aware that Bebe was saving herself for marriage.

"A couple of them are on JV Football. Clyde has grown up a lot and would definitely talk to them if you asked him to. He really likes you, and it would make him feel good to prove he's changed." I informed them.

Kyle and Bebe turned to me in perfect sync and stared at me like I'd grown a second head.

"Thanks," Bebe said slowly, and she looked as if she wanted to say more, but the bell rang and I was gone before she could.

Lunch: A time that the more popular students use to gossip, make out, and start shit. Lunch is also a time that people like me dread.

I made my way to the far right corner where Butters was waiting for me.

"Well hey there Tweek!" Butters greeted, and I waved in return.

I flopped into a chair and dug through my messenger bag for my thermos—not coffee—and took a long drink.

"Kyle said that our little mute spoke in class today." Kenny stated as he sat down beside Butters, wrapping an arm around the smaller blonde's waist.

Butters turned his attention back to me with a wide grin.

"That's wonderful Tweek!" he shouted.

I ducked my head in embarrassment when a few people turned to stare at us.

Here's the thing: as a general rule, I do not speak in school. Kenny and Butters spend enough time with me to know that I'm not being a dick or something, I just don't want to slip up and remind all of my peers how I used to act.

Act isn't really the right word…how I was I guess.

Kenny launched into a seriously embellished version of what happened, and the two of them gazed at me like doting parents whose thirty year old basement dwelling son had finally gotten laid and was moving out.

Since Butters and I were best friends, Kenny loved me by default. He was alright, though he tended to be overly cuddly when he'd had one hit too many. Unfortunately, this friendship brought about a healthy fear of Kenny being too drunk or high to stop himself from divulging any secrets of mine that Butters may have let slip.

I let my eyes wander away from the strangeness that was Bunny, and glanced around the noisy cafeteria. I was startled to find the blue eyes of Craig Tucker staring back at me.

I flinched and looked back at my own table before standing up.

"Smoke." I mumbled before I had a complete nervous breakdown right then and there.

Butters and Kenny both smiled at me and waved in unison.

What the hell is with people matching up today?

I left the cafeteria at a fast clip and made my way to the parking lot. I pulled a slightly squished pack of Marlboro Smooth 100's out of my bag and lit it.

I took a drag and closed my eyes, leaning against my beat up Wrangler, and may have fallen asleep if I hadn't heard the distinct sound of footsteps.

Damn. It. All.

I opened one eye slowly and found Craig staring down at me.

"Hey Tweek," he greeted softly, as if loud noises might cause me to attack. For shit's sake…I gave him a nod of acknowledgement and took another drag. "So, I wanted to thank you for putting a good word in for Clyde." He continued in a slightly louder voice.

"Clyde has always been kind to me." I replied before shrugging as if it didn't matter.

Even though he had started the conversation, Craig seemed shocked that I had answered him.

Was me not talking seriously that big of a freaking deal?

"Yeah, he is." Craig shifted as if uncomfortable, then his gaze locked with mine. "Look, I'm sorry about that fight. I miss having you around man."

It took me a minute to realize that he was talking about that time in the third grade when our classmates had turned him against me.

"Why now?" I asked, even though if I was being honest I would admit that I missed him as well. "It's a little late to care."

Craig actually looked hurt as I stubbed out my cigarette and walked away.

CRAIG TUCKER

I watched Tweek walk away with a feeling of despair. It was so long ago, we didn't even know each other anymore, so I shouldn't feel let down.

But he was once my best friend. Yeah, I had Clyde and Token, but I really did miss Tweek. With all of his insane theories and his little quirks, I didn't feel like I had to work as hard to impress him like I did with Token—who was suave—and Clyde—who was popular—I could just be me.

Tweek had changed a lot since middle school. His hair was cut like those goth kids, but it was still blonde and therefore natural, which made it a little less depressing. He liked to wear skinny jeans and sweaters, the soft kind, not the ones with college names displayed across the front. He also had a thin silver ring in his bottom lip, on the left side.

Token said my attention to all of Tweek's little details was alarming, whereas Clyde thought it was cute.

But how could I not notice that on the last day of middle school, Tweek had been essentially the same kid I'd known in elementary school, but came to high school with a new way of dress and didn't speak, let alone have outbursts or stutter.

He wasn't jittery anymore. It was like someone had abducted the old Tweek and replaced him with a soft-sweater wearing imposter that was always getting bullied but refused to take action.

I knew this wasn't true because he still had those unusual eyes, the ones that were so grey that they were almost clear. The shade had to be one of a kind. And as far as the bullying went, we all assumed it was Cartman since he had to find someone else to pick on when Kyle finally laid his ass out one afternoon. Besides, Tweek didn't talk, so it's not like people had a reason to hate him.

I was shocked when Clyde had told us that Tweek had given Bebe advice involving him, though I was more shocked that he had even spoken to begin with.

I knew that he hung out with McCormick and Butters a lot, so obviously he made some form of contact.

I sighed when I realized that I had been standing in the parking lot for ten minutes musing about Tweek.

It was strange how you could know so much about someone just by observing them, and still know nothing at all about who they had become.

A/N: I combined the prologue and the first chapter since the prologue was so short. I'm already several chapters in and will be adding another chapter within the next day or two. Thank you for reading, and please review.