Hello! This is a story that accompanied a picture Cathy (Edward) drew for a contest on DeviantArt (which won first place, I might add). If you've gone and read our other story, Wounded, Broken, but Loved, then you know that all of our stories we wrote together. All of the parts containing Edward is written by Cathy, and parts with Roy are written by myself (Mika).

Disclaimer: We do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of the characters.

Enjoy!


Ed stood in front of the Colonel's desk, looking at the man with shocked golden yellow eyes. Did he just hear him right? The Colonel had his head bowed, leaning his forehead against folded hands propped by the elbows on his smooth wooden desk. Ed had dropped his report to the floor only a few minutes ago, the papers scattered everywhere.

Ed took in a shocked breath. He knew this was coming, but he didn't think it would be so soon. After all the years of fearing this day, why had he been so shocked to hear the news just now? It made him want to break down in tears, but he didn't. He was too strong for that and didn't want to show any sign of weakness, especially in front of the Colonel.

He then thought back to the conversation he had with Mustang not just 5 minutes ago.

"Here you go Colonel Bastard! One 10 page report on that western town you made me investigate!" he had said, waving the leaves of paper in front of the Colonel's face.

Roy was deathly silent and he didn't even bother looking up at the boy, trying to process the words he wanted to say through his mind. "Fullmetal..."

Ed blinked, tilting his head at Roy confused. "What? Did I turn it in too late? You said before 10 tonight!" Ed said and huffed in frustration.

Roy quickly brought his head up and shook it. "No! No..." he said, pinching the bridge of his nose as if he was trying to block out a headache and looked up at the boy sadly. "Fullmetal... You know the war in the South?" he had asked slowly, grimacing as the words slid off his tongue as if he just ate something disgusting.

Ed started to get a little worried and he nodded his head slowly. "Yeah...?" he asked, waiting for what Roy was going to say next, but he had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. He had felt it all day, like that shadow of death was looming over him since he woke up, but he thought nothing of it and brushed it aside. Now he wished he didn't.

Roy gazed at him sternly, but also in a way as if to comfort the boy and tell him everything was alright. After a few moments of silence and tension, Roy suddenly blurted it out and Ed dropped his report, the papers scattering everywhere like leaves falling from a stiff tree.

"...We've been called out to the front lines..."

Ed took another deep breath, trying to choke back a sob. He wasn't going to cry. 'Dammit! I've been through hell before! I can handle this!'Ed scolded himself. But when he looked at Roy again, he couldn't help but hold back the devastated look on his face. "N-No..." he said, trembling.

Roy raised his head a bit to rest his folded hands against his grimacing lips. He glanced up at his subordinate, but when he saw the pained expression, the suppressed tears, he found he couldn't meet his eyes, and chose instead to stare at the desk in front of him as he spoke. "Those are official orders," he said stiffly, trying not the let too much emotion creep into his voice. "You are expected to prepare and be ready to leave in three days." As if you can really prepare yourself forthat.

Ed tried to stop his hands from trembling, already clamped into tight fists. 'Why? Why me?' he wondered and looked up at the man. There was no emotion behind Mustang's mask, and Ed couldn't tell what he was feeling that moment, only that the orders were given and the dogs were to be unleashed in three days. 'Another massacre...'Ed thought, the lump in his throat was getting thick and he found it hard to swallow. If they were calling out the State Alchemists, then things must be getting serious in the South, and Ed feared it would be a repeat of the Ishval war.

It was true. Mustang had experienced this before. His hands were stained with blood already. But Ed vowed he wouldn't kill while in the military. Why should they? War was stupid and pointless. "I-Isn't there a way to back out of it?" Ed asked, realizing that his voice was cracking and he tried his best to clear his throat.

Roy snapped his eyes back up to meet wide golden ones, hearing in his voice just how terrified the alchemist really was. "No. Anything you could possibly do would be counted as abandoning your post. Treason. " His eyes were still locked into Edward, but they were no longer seeing him. He was seeing all the strong men who had crumbled. Broken. Fleeing from the terror of war. And the punishment brought down on them. He suppressed a shudder at the thought of the fiery youth before him looking like that, broken and empty.

Sitting in silence for only a moment longer, Roy leaned back and busied his hands with shuffling papers, looking indifferent. "Dismissed, Fullmetal." He said quietly.

Ed bowed his head in defeat. He wanted to say that he would just give up his State license now and walk away, but it wasn't that easy. Plus, he couldn't just walk away from getting Al's body back. No, being a State Alchemist was his only chance. He then let out a shuttered sigh and bent down, picking up the papers of his report he dropped earlier. He then shakily stacked them back in page order and slid the document to his commanding officer, his eyes hidden under his bangs.

"I'll see you Thursday then..." he mumbled and turned to leave, not waiting for Mustang to review his report like he always did.


The next three days for Ed was hell. He barely slept at all, fear of what was going to happen down in the South. He had told Al and his brother wanted to go with him, but Ed refused. 'I'm the one wearing the leash, Al! You can't be dragged into this too! Please... I promise I'll come back.'

Ed rubbed his face. Would he come back? He wasn't sure, and the thought twisted in his stomach that made him want to puke. He even called Winry and told her, thinking she had the right to know too. As always, the girl broke down in tears.

Al had walked with Ed to the train station, suitcase in one hand and Ed's coat in the other as his older brother met up with Colonel Mustang. They said their good byes and Ed bumped fists with Al, grinning as he said "I'll be back soon," like he was going on a short trip with the Colonel.

Ed was now sitting on the train near the window, leaning his head against the glass as he watched the beautiful scenery fly by. Soon that scenery he was seeing would turn to blood and despair. Next to Ed, the Colonel was scribbling signatures on some documents, still doing paper work no matter where he went. Ed blinked a few times and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, looking around at all the soldiers seated around them. A lot of them were at lower ranks, pawns, if you could call them that, and a few State Alchemists here and there. 'Sacrifices in the bloodshed and the human weapons standing behind them using them as shields...'Ed thought and shivered suddenly as if he was freezing.

Roy glanced up as he saw the shivering out of the corner of his eye. It was hardly cold in the stuffy train, but it wasn't hard to figure out the reason behind the shudder. Each minute brought them closer to the battlefield, and for Edward, closer to the unknown. Turning back to his papers, he resumed his furious scribbling. It wasn't as if he really cared much about deadlines, or getting it done. But it was something, and it kept him busy and his mind from wandering. Dwelling on the upcoming battle only brought fear and uncertainty when the time came.

Glancing back up at Edward, Roy realized that that was exactly what the younger was doing right now. Moving aside the pile of papers on his lap a bit, he rummaged around in his suitcase for a moment before locating a book. Pulling it out, he studied the cover a moment to see it was one of his many books on flame alchemy. Not entirely sure Edward would be interested in the subject, Roy held it out to him anyway. "Here. Something to do."

Ed blinked and turned his head, blinking down at the book. After a second of wondering what to do, he finally decided to take the book. "Thanks..." he mumbled and started reading. He found that reading did help take his mind off of things for a while and he relaxed against the window.


It was near midday when the train arrived to their destination. All soldiers were quickly moved off the train and forced to hike the rest of the way toward the battlefield. Roy and Ed were given hand held guns, not like the big rifles since they were State Alchemist, they didn't need them. The pistols were given to them in case they had no other choice when alchemy was useless.

Ed stared at the pistol in his hand, eyes a bit wide. He remembered when Lieutenant Hawkeye gave him her gun for defense, but he never used it. He then shrugged and stuck in the back of his pants like he did the last time and looked up at Roy sadly before they were all forced to march.

Once they made it to the camps, Ed could hear the loud sounds of gunfire and explosions here and there in the distance. He then gulped and hugged himself as if trying to keep out the cold, even though it was late summer and they were in the South.

"Alright, you maggots! Here's the deal! We have enemy forces coming in from here and here..." shouted a General, pointing at a large map. "You soldiers will go in first and draw them back. Then we'll send in the State Alchemists to do the rest," he yelled and looked over at Roy. "Mustang! You and Fullmetal will take your squad around east!"

Ed looked up at Roy and blinked. 'So I'm staying with the Colonel?'he asked himself, sighing in relief. Still, it didn't lift the heavy weight that was still bearing down on his shoulders.

Roy nodded and saluted. "Yes sir, General!" Turning back to Edward, he looked at him sadly when he saw the blond hugging himself and nearly shaking. "Come on Fullmetal, let's go," he said quietly, resting a hand on his shoulder. Turning away, the rest of the squad followed him as he led them on a long path to curve around the east side of the main battle. It was a tiring, hot march, and they had only completed about half of it so far.

A tiny movement caught his eye, and he turned to closer inspect it. Raising his hand a bit, he signaled the rest of the squad to stop. "Be careful, men, I think-" But suddenly the sand in front of him shot up in a wall of tan and he was thrown back a few feet as the ground shook beneath him. "Fall back!" He yelled out, as he looked around wildly for the person responsible for the small explosion.

Ed yelped out as another explosion caught him off guard and knocked him a few feet back. He looked up in a panic, realizing that he wasn't hurt, but the soldiers all began to scramble left and right.

"Fall back, men! Strike them from afar! Get those grenades!"

Ed looked around in a panic, unsure what to do. He then realized one thing. He lost sight of Mustang.

Ed then stood up and began running through the ditches. He knew if he stayed in one spot, he would be killed for sure. "I won't die!" he said out loud to himself. Though he was determined not to kill either. 'I may have to if I'm in a pickle...'he thought, desperately searching for Roy. "Colonel!" he called. "COLONEL MUSTANG!"

Ed rounded a corner, ducking his head as he heard gunfire. What he saw when he turned made him want to puke. He was behind a wall of sandbags, one built high to keep the soldiers protected from the gunfire. What he saw were all Central soldiers, multiple bullet holes in their bodies and lying in a pool of blood. He stared at them for a moment, thinking they were probably ambushed and cornered in this area. He finally forced himself to look away and turned, determined to find the Colonel now.

"Well, look what I found! A rat, all alone!"

Ed quickly shot his head up, eyes wide. A group of soldiers stood in front of him, about three of them, but they weren't Central soldiers. They were Southern soldiers. Ed froze like a deer in the headlights, unsure what to do. He was scared, frightened, and terrified and above all else he could've sworn he wet his pants.

"What's a brat like him doing here? Don't tell me Central's sending in kids now!" another one of the three men said, advancing on Ed.

Ed tried to clear his head and think of something to do. 'I have to fight!'he thought to himself and took a deep breath, clapping his hands.

The men saw this action and froze.

"He's a State Alchemist!"

"QUICK! Shoot him! SHOOT THE FUCKER!"

The third man quickly drew his pistol and shot.

Ed could feel a sharp pain in his side and stopped his transmutation in shock. As if time had slowed down, Ed slowly fell backwards to the ground.

"Not so tough now, are you, you piece of shit?" one said and walked over to Ed, stepping on his side where he got shot.

Ed screeched out in pain, quickly grabbing the man's boot as if trying to move it off his wound. Ed's head then snapped to the side as he was kicked in the head and then he was kicked in the side so he was now laying on his stomach.

"Pathetic... It's a pity to see a child do Central's dirty work..." one said, pressing the toe of his boot to the back of Ed's head and pressed down slowly.

Ed screamed and cried as his face was pressed into the mud, gritting his teeth as the filth entered his mouth. He sputtered and choked, flailing his arms to get free. Alchemy was useless now. He couldn't think straight. He knew that he was in too much pain and humiliated and was soon going to die.

"Well, looks like they did give their dog a gun," one said, grabbing at the gun that was stuffed in the back of Ed's pants and aimed it at his head.

"Well, do it already! Kill the little bastard!"

Ed lied there helplessly, finding it hard to breathe as his face was pushed further into the mud and sand and let out muffled cries of help.


Roy turned back to see if the rest of his squad had backed a safe enough distance away, and realized in horror that they had all panicked. Gun shots could be heard now, and the screams of soldiers serenaded the air. The battle had spread even wider, and now Roy could see the trenches and bodies clearly. 'Oh god, the sight of the bodies, Fullmetal is probably-' But that thought stopped and his mind went blank when he turned and realized with a horrible sinking in his stomach, that Edward was gone.

Roy just froze, eyes wide in fear, not for himself, but for Edward. It was only the sound of a solider screaming in agony right next to him that snapped him out of his shock, and he bolted forward to start a desperate search. 'Why the hell did I even let him out of my sight? This is a battlefield, why didn't I have the sense to watch him closer?'

Out of the countless screams in the air, Roy had no idea how he managed to hear that one. Hear it and identify it, and race towards it desperately. Because that was the sound of a child's scream. And it was terribly, undeniably, Edward. The cries stopped, and Roy now had nothing to follow, and he feared the worse. Rounding one last corner, Roy Mustang stopped dead.

Three southern soldiers were surrounding Edward, leering down at him as they pressed his face into the mud and kicked him. One of them held a gun pointed at his head, and Roy recognized it as the one Edward was given. And the blood... Edward's side was completely covered in blood, and it splattered out onto the sand next to him.

Roy let out a cry of fury and swung his fist, connecting hard with the face of the man who held the gun. Momentarily forgetting both his alchemy and his own gun, he dealt the same to the other two with a sick satisfaction as he felt jaws and noses break under his fist and saw the blood of the vile worms. Breathing heavily, Roy sank down on his knees next to Edward.

Roy carefully pulled him into his arms and used his sleeve to wipe away the mud on Edwards face. "Fullme- Edward, Edward!"

Ed fluttered his eyes open and gasped for breath, now that his face was out of the sand. He then blinked up at Roy, trying to register what happened and who just saved him. Realization kicked in and he relaxed in Roy's arms. "C-Colonel... I tried to find y-you..." he said, smiling weakly as he held his wound, but he couldn't hold back the tears that slipped down his cheeks.

"I'm p-pathetic... I-I couldn't even... fight back..." he mumbled, fighting his lungs to breath. "Am... I going t-to die..?" he asked sadly.

What Ed and Roy didn't notice was one of the men Roy knocked out was still conscious. "You bastard!" he yelled, holding his nose and picked up the gun next to him, quickly aiming it at Ed again.

Roy gasped and turned himself to shield Edward just as a gunshot rang out. The colonel looked down at him with a grimacing smile, ignoring the crimson blossoming from his blue-clad shoulder. Roy gently brought his thumb up and wiped off a spot of blood that had splattered from his shoulder onto the younger's cheek, holding him closer to his chest. "No," he whispered, barely heard over the cries that continued on around them. "You're not pathetic, Edward, you're amazing. And you are notgoing to die. I-I won't allow it, you hear me?" Roy's voice wavered slightly as the blond took a few more shuddering breaths and laid his head against this superior's chest. The man behind them gave a shout and more footsteps were heard running towards them as a squad of southern soldiers crowded together behind him. "Edward..." he whispered again, "...Don't worry. You're safe. I'll protect you."

Whipping around to face the soldiers, making sure to still keep Edward shielded, Roy's eyes burned with hate. His face twisted in rage as he brought his arm up, fingers pressed together. "I'll protect you!"

A wall of flame erupted before him as the familiar sight of his enemies burning raged in front of him. Edward was completely still at his side, and just the thought of what these so called 'soldiers' did to him fueled more anger, and more flames. It was only when there was nothing more around him but ash did he finally stop and lower his arm, and it was only then that he noticed the tears on his cheeks.

Ed sobbed as he clung to Roy, those words he spoke made Ed realize how much he really cared.

I'll protect you!

Ed buried his face in Roy's jacket and watched from the corner of his eye as Roy released his fury on the Southern soldiers, burning them all to nothing but ash. In a way, he felt bad for anyone who messed with Colonel Mustang, but then he realized that he wasn't defending himself, but he was defending Ed.

Ed watched as the wall of fire began to die down, watching the light in a fixed trance. He felt very dizzy and he could have sworn his side was starting to go numb. He shifted in Roy's grip a bit and looked around. Everyone around them was dead, and he knew that if more came, they would be turned to ash as well. He blinked a couple of times, finding it hard to breath as he gasped for breath, his consciousness slowly slipping. He then turned his head to look at Roy and smiled weakly, moving his mouth, but no words came out. But from what Roy could tell, he mouthed "I love you"and then he slowly blacked out.

The tears slipping down his cheeks went unnoticed as his breath caught in his throat as he stared down at the blond in his arms. Edward's eyes were closed and he was unmoving now, and Roy would never have dared hope those mouthed words had been real, if not for the soft, nearly peaceful smile on Ed's lips.

Roy knew Edward was far beyond hearing him now. He knew the words would never reach him. But right now, here among the bodies of allies, enemies, friends, strangers...Here within the chaos of the bloodshed, he whispered brokenly the one thing he had longed to tell the one in his arms for so long. "I love you, Edward..."

Getting shakily to his feet while still gripping Edward as close to himself as was possible, Roy lurched forward, his mind set on an infirmary tent. The pain in his shoulder, the blood on his clothes, the bullets around them; None of that mattered, none of that would get in his way. After all, he had promised to protect him.


Ed woke up later, not sure exactly how much time had flown by. Minutes? Hours? Days? Weeks? He wasn't sure. All he knew was that he felt very groggy, like someone had drugged him. He then went to sit up, but hissed, feeling pain in his side. He blinked, looking down too see that he was heavily bandaged. What had happened? That's right... He was shot in the side. Then Mustang came to save him...

Ed's eyes suddenly widened, feeling something move next to him and darted his head to the side. There, laying sprawled out on the bed on his stomach, like he had just collapsed and passed out there, was Colonel Roy Mustang. His jacket and shirt were off and his right shoulder was bandaged. He blushed deeply, replaying the last events he could remember in his head. Ed had almost died, but Roy came to save him, and the last things he muttered very softly to him was "I love you" before passing out.

Ed thought he was going to die. If he knew he wasn't, he probably would have never muttered those words, and the thought that Roy Mustang caught those words made him blush even deeper. 'He said he would protect me... Does he love me too?'he wondered to himself and looked around the tent. The two were alone for now, hidden behind a white sheet. Ed scooted closer to Roy and nuzzled his nose against his neck before looking up at his face. "Thank you..." he said and lightly kissed him on the lips.

Something warm was pressed against his lips, and Roy sighed softly and shifted to pull whatever it was closer to him. So warm... His eyes slowly blinked open and he was shocked from his half-asleep state by the sight of gold before him. The warmth against him was Edward, looking just as shocked as Roy felt. But he hesitated only a fleeting moment before sliding his eyes shut again and pressing himself closer, gently returning the kiss.

Did he have the courage to say it when he knew it would be heard? But... Edward was here, alive, right next to him. What if he wasn't? What if he had been too late? The one he cared for so deeply would never had known how he felt...There never was telling when somebody would be ripped away from you in this world, and if you never take a chance, you won't ever get anywhere. You will only look back and regret the chances you never took, the people you never gave a chance to love you. Sometimes to gain something, you just had to risk everything.

"...I love you, Edward. So I will protect you, no matter what."

Ed smiled and relaxed as he said those words. "I'm glad..." and with that, Ed cuddled next to Roy and fell asleep beside him, not caring who would see them together like this. Roy was here and watching over him and for once, he was happy.


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