ON LAVENDER WIND
Summary: There are many things you can regret. But to cross a bridge and move on, you have to forgive. Subtle hints of KaiCon, focused on Aoko. Oneshot.
Rating: K
Genre: Spiritual/Hurt/Comfort
A/N: Hints of KaiCon. I apologize to those who think this is fully Kaito and Conan – with Aoko in here and all that. Totally random...when have I written stories like these before…? Ugh, those plunnies… By the way, I have no beta, so beware of mistakes and errors!
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It's a starry night.The sky seems darker than usual, and the wane, waxing crescent moon is obscured by heavy clouds.
And yet, tiny glimmers shimmer through, plainly visible to the naked eye.
A dark haired young woman looks up at them, head tilting upwards, strands of hair falling to her shoulders gracefully. There's wistfulness in her brown eyes, glazed, as she thinks of another time. She pauses, to enjoy the sky, and remembers…
…a mocking grin that haunted her – always…
…the glint of a single monocle that guarded a violet eye…scarlet blood…jet black gun…a bang…
Betrayal…
But she forces those ugly thoughts out of her mind, locks them away in the jail cell of memories, stomping on them and sweeping them afar, pushing them under pleasanter times.
No, she mustn't think of that. She must not, will not – would not ever again. And yet, under the crack of memory's door, using a key she couldn't bring herself to destroy, it is persistent, reminding her in the tiniest of whispers, creeping along on stealthy cat feet…
The wind stirs impatiently, as if sensing the woman's anguish. Her long hair is blown back, flying outwards, their strands brushing on her face.
Where – where was she again, anyway?
A bridge, a thought whispers into the shell of her ear. A bridge, where choices are made, decisions carried out, roads taken, bridges crossed, bridges burnt, and bridges built - simply a bridge.
And you're simply waiting.
Her shoes tread softly on grey stones that construct the bridge's surface. Below, water flows and ebbs through a narrow channel, lapping at grass-covered shores. The soothing aroma of lavender flowers carries on the breeze. It's soothing – to close her eyes and relax, feel the cool breeze, and to merely listen.
Dim lamp lights perching on the bridge's walls illuminate her crossing, but she can't see what's ahead, she can't go there. No matter how hard she tries, no matter how many times – she cannot cross that bridge. It's as if something is keeping her back, forcing her to remain on only one half of the structure. Like an invisible wall that repels her whole self, existing solely to keep her out. Everything is eerily silent – there are no other people.
In the far-off distance, a clock tower chimes, sonorous gongs resonating towards the bridge. In the moment, time seems to speed up and shift…and everything seems to become louder.
The wind picks up and howls, whistling through dew covered grass. Faster and faster it swirls, as if trying to compel everything it gusts to bend, to break before its strength. The water's tide picks up, ramming against the bridge like ocean waves, sloshing noisily. The lamp lights flicker hesitantly…
And the far-off clock's bongs begin to pound, shaking the earth and rattling the sky.
And abruptly, everything falls silent, as if the bridge is enclosed in the eye of a storm.
The young woman hears the sounds of shoes padding on the stones, approaching her. A small, shadowed figure strolls into view.
The lamplights waver for one more time until the woman can clearly distinguish the other. The shadows begin to clear.
To her surprise, it's a young boy about six or seven years old who is there to greet her. He seemed so familiar…but there seemed to be something missing from him. But besides the strange emotion of familiarity, he is a stranger to her. If she did know him before, it was barely.
He gives her a lopsided smile, blue eyes gleaming in the starlight. "It's a nice night, isn't it, Aoko-niichan?" There's something off about him - something that doesn't feel exactly right. Maybe it's his eyes – they're so unsettling, eyes of an old man, almost. Eyes of a man who has been through so much, full of pain that will just keep on growing…
Her throat dry, the young woman, Nakamori Aoko, blinks in incredulity. "How – how did you know my name…?"
"Somebody sent me here to talk to you – somebody who knows you very well. He can't face you himself, so he sent me instead." Deep in thought, the boy shuffles his feet in the air, as if dribbling an invisible soccer ball. Suddenly, the boy says, "Don't you want to cross this bridge?"
Put off by the change of subject, the young woman stammers, "I-I guess so. I've been trying to, but I can't get through."
"If you really want to go, then what are you waiting for?"
Even though it sounds absurd, the woman replies truthfully. "I can't. Something keeps me from crossing."
"Then you don't want to go," the boy tells her plainly. "You still have something to do here."
"Let me tell you a story," the child says softly, in response to Aoko's confused silence. "Once upon a time, a boy left behind an important friend by keeping dangerous secrets. She's not just a regular friend, she's a best friend. He's always by her side, but she doesn't know his secrets. The reason he lies is to protect her, to make sure that she'll be safe. He's gotten in a lot of trouble and danger, and he wants to make everything right.
"He watches her and is always there for her, but he always lies. She doesn't know he's exactly there. So she misses him as much as he misses her – after all, they're close friends, and they care about each other. The boy knows being with her can get her hurt or even killed, so he decides to lie. But she's out of harm's way, kept in the dark, yes, but safe."
A shadow crosses the boy's deep blue eyes. "The girl feels betrayed, of course – she knows there's something wrong. She may find the partial truth, and become tormented all the while, blaming the boy. She'll lash out to him; hate him, for deceiving her. She'll cry and yell and scream." The child's voice became hoarse, quavering and quivering, shaking and trembling.
"It hurts the boy even more, because he's trying to protect her the whole time. He's sorry for lying to her, for making her lonely, but…for just one single moment, can't she understand, and forgive him? So he decides to tell her the truth. But by that time…by that time it may be too late." The dark haired boy falls quiet, reflecting.
"Too...late…?" Aoko asks quietly, still not understanding the purpose of the story.
"She's either moved on and decides to forget about him," the boy murmurs, pain in his tone of voice, regret shown clearly on his face. "Or he couldn't save her in time from evil."
And at the last sentence, he inclines his head to one side, in Aoko's direction. "Move on, Nakamori Aoko. Your mother is waiting for you. And he's sorry – so understand and forgive."
"But…"
"I told you my story. It's almost exactly the same as his."
Mustering her courage, Aoko whispers, "Who…?"
"It must be hard to remember, after all this time," the boy says gently, understanding shining from his deep blue eyes. He meets her baffled gaze evenly. "You know my name, and the name of my beloved."
As if in a trance, Aoko takes a step forward, poking a foot through. And she's crossing the bridge, slowly and hesitantly.
Her shoes tread on the stones, and she's almost there. A golden gate seems to appear out of nowhere, waiting for her to open it.
On the other side of the gate, bright light shines through, and beautiful music drifts around. A sweet scent wafts through her nose, and she inhales in it. And she hears a voice calling out to her…
Suddenly, her hands, poised to open the gate, falters, and she turns to look back at the boy. "Aren't you coming?"
"I cannot," the boy mutters, averting his longing gaze. "Not I, nor him."
It is they, a thought whispers on golden wind, they who bear the curse of immortality.
Aoko unbolts the gate lock, and the bolt slides. "I-Thank you."
A memory flashes through her mind, a figure in white talking to a little child wearing oversized glasses. A detective and a thief…
She smiles sincerely as she walks through the gate, pausing to look back at the boy with a grateful wave.
"Thank you, Kudou Shinichi…and Kaito."From the shadows near the bridge, a figure flashes an old, familiar grin. He looks as he always had before, all excepting scarlet eyes, deep red like the tears of a ruby.
Kuroba Kaito takes the young boy's hand as they walk away from the golden gate that they can never enter, and retreat back to the world of the living. And they leave, the fragrance of lavender still lingering…
As they continue to walk across their own endless bridge – together.
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A/N: Crazy…I think there was even supposed to be a train in here somewhere. But I guess I cut that out, that'd probably make this even more confusing. And Conan was supposed to be yelling at Aoko…and she was supposed to be alive. I guess I left that out, too.
Did anyone understand the story I'm trying to get across?