A/N - This is the start of a holiday fanfic for MTR. Basically, it's based on the song The 12 Days of Christmas, and was inspired when I heard the zany Relient K version. Only other notes is I borrowed some lyrics from that version, and the whole B-I-L thing is from Kim Possible. Other than that I can't think of anything. Hope this helps everyone get into the holiday spirit : ) I'll post another chapter tomorrow to make up for the week of lost time that I'll have when I'm not updating this coming week. Also, the chapters are meant to be short. It helps me since I'll probably be writing a lot of Christmas oneshots also this month XD Enjoy.

Chapter 1

Wilbur woke up to another chilly morning, hating that he had to get out of bed and leave the warmth of his sheet and comforter. As he placed his bare feet to the cold floor, he looked out through his gigantic floor to ceiling window and saw that there was already a thin layer of snow on the ground and that it was still flurrying ever so lightly. "Thermal floor on," he said with a yawn and a stretch and felt the floor warm instantly under his feet. He lagged as he got dressed but eventually was ready to go to breakfast. However, on his way to the dining room, he stopped and saw that his family was gathered in the foyer around what appeared to be a tree. "What's going on?"

"Hey, kiddo, look at what I got," Grandpa Bud motioned to Wilbur who neared and saw that it was in fact a tree, a rather grown tree for that matter, at least six feet tall. Hanging on one of the branches was a very elegant cage containing one small bird. "It's a partridge in a pear tree."

"What's a partridge?" a few of them asked simultaneously.

"What's a pear tree!?" Wilbur asked more boisterously. "I mean, seriously, who knew pears came from…trees. I thought they came from gardens or cans or something like that."

"I used to have one of these things when I was a young whippersnapper. And every year my mom would make us the most wonderful pear deserts."

"I remember that," Fritz spoke up timidly. "Vaguely that is. I was only about three or four at the time."

"It's about time you remembered something," Petunia followed in her usual manner.

"Do you remember, dear?" Billie asked her husband, Joe, who only responded in shaking his head no.

"I think we moved from the house where we had the tree planted long before Joe was even thought of," Bud answered, acknowledging the age gap between the three brothers.

"Okay, so now that we've established that it's a partridge in a pear tree," Wilbur decided to take charge again, "where did it come from and what exactly are we supposed to do with it?"

"Well, the card says 'From Your True Love' but your grandma says she didn't have anything to do with it," Bud replied.

"That's right, I didn't. Bud never even told me about the pear tree, and if he had, I plum forgot about it," Lucille said.

"Maybe they sent it to the wrong family," Franny considered allowed. "I know the card says to Bud Robinson, but perhaps there's another Bud Robinson."

"I suppose that that's possible," Cornelius responded to his wife's idea. "After all, it is a common name. But we can't really return to sender. I'll contact the post office and see if they can give us any more information on the matter. In the meantime, this thing can't very well stay in the foyer, especially since we've already got the Christmas tree in here, so could someone give me a hand in taking it outside where a tree this size belongs?"

"You've got it b-i-l," Art spoke up immediately.

"Wait, who's b-i-l?" Wilbur asked in confusion.

"Why your dad is of course, and me, and Gaston, well, Gaston is to your father, not me," Art said in what might as well have been riddles.

"I'm still confused."

"It's an acronym for brother-in-law," Cornelius answered.

"That's right. Our uncle and our dad used to say it all the time to one another," Franny filled in some blanks.

"Great…another weird family tradition," Wilbur rolled his eyes and walked towards the dining room to wait for breakfast.

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"What's going on now?" Wilbur said coming, more like running, home from the last day of school before Christmas break. He saw some of his family in the yard toiling over planting the pear tree. They had shoveled a bunch of snow away from a designated spot, and now were digging through the muddy ground.

"It turns out that there was no mistake in the recipient of this tree," Cornelius said as he put down his shovel and moved his frozen fingers a little to get blood pumping back into them. "The guy at the post office said that the sender was very clear on the matter and that they wished to remain anonymous. He also said not to come back asking anymore questions no matter how bizarre things get, whatever that meant."

"Well, if he knew anything, he should already know that things are bizarre enough around here as it is. I mean, come on guys, planting a tree in the middle of winter!?"

"You can join us if you like, sweetie," Franny offered.

"Alright!" Wilbur responded excitedly, revealing that he had wanted to join in from the get go. "Wait, where's the bird?"

"Your grandpa and grandma are in the house finding a spot for it. We couldn't leave it out here in the cold," Cornelius answered his son.

"In my country we eat partridges," Billie chimed in. "Tasty little pheasants."

"Yeah, let's eat it!" Petunia screeched.

"We can't eat it," Laszlo shuddered at his mom's suggestion.

"I am so not eating it. The only birds I eat are chicken…and only chickens I haven't seen alive first," Tallulah added.

"Pheasants are actually very good," Billie chimed in again. "Me and your Uncle Joe had pheasant at our wedding."

"That was some good bird," Fritz said, recalling the taste.

"Dad!" Laszlo and Tallulah exclaimed simultaneously.

"Honey, you might want to do something before Art and Gaston gets involved and turn this into a real argu…" Franny started but was interrupted by the sound of Art and Gaston adding their two cents. "…too late."

"No it isn't," Cornelius promised. "Alright everyone, there will be no eating the partridge. I highly doubt dad would like the idea of us eating his gift so that's the end of it okay?"

"Are you sure you don't want to eat it?" Wilbur asked mischievously.

"Wilbur…" Cornelius warned him to stop, bringing the discussion to a complete end.