Hello, all! This just randomly came into my mind and would not leave, so I wrote it and down and I guess I like it enough to post it. I was thinking about SR and got a little bit depressed and this is what came out. It's short and sad but also kinda beautiful, in my opinion. So let me know what you think...
Dizzy
It's been two months, and still, she hasn't called for you. Of course, you get to see her practically every day anyway, but it isn't the same because as Clark she hardly knows you exist anymore. She's too busy with her job, her son (your son), and her fiance to catch up with an old friend who's been gone for five years. Funny how she never once questions that...but you've already said how busy she is.
She hasn't called for you, and you're thinking that maybe she's really and fully moved on. That maybe, just maybe, she really doesn't love you anymore. You can hear how her heart skips a beat every time she sees Richard, but you also hear it do the same when she hears "Superman" on the news or the lips of a fellow co-worker. You see her gaze into nothing at odd moments of the day, and you know she is trying to remember something by the way the corners of her mouth pull down slightly.
She hasn't called for you, and you finally realize why. It's not because she doesn't want you anymore, not because she's ever stopped wanting you...but because now, she doesn't want to want you. And that hurts more than anything. It hurts more than anything to know that she somehow wakes up, even from the deepest sleep, when you visit Jason – and she still says nothing. It hurts more than anything to know that she was happy before you came back into her life – and now she isn't.
She hasn't called for you, and you won't approach her. Because as much as it hurts, you love her. You've always loved her, and you want her to be happy. So yes, you'll always be around. And you'll be a part of Jason's life. But you won't interfere with the family that she has put together. You won't seek her out. You won't stand in the way of her happiness. And if ignoring you and being with Richard makes her happy, then so be it.