A/N: I know I have two stories to finish so it makes no sense to start a new one! However, I haven't been very well for some time now which means my concentration is up the left making it hard to write. This has been floating around over my illness so when I can I write.

To Katie for her patience and to Daphne for her consistent encouragement. Bless you both.

Disclaimer – Ah come on! I know I don't own this – you know that already!

The Genius of Sadness

Prologue

"She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum."

― Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything is Illuminated

Daniel – When the Bottom fell out of the World

What do you do when the world breaks down around you? Do you stand in the corner or do you hide in the shadows? Do you face the hoard with a brave face reciting your story over and over again? Daniel looked into darkness of the infirmary and for once he did not want to look anywhere near the light. It was all there in his mind's eye. Her body now rested on the slab with Jack and everyone else looking on with sympathy. Shau'ri was dead and nothing in the world could change his grief over that. He could not look anyone in the eye and feel joy. The Stargate had driven that from him. Any joy that had been there for finding Shau'ri was now gone. All his love for exploring new worlds and possibilities were now dead. As far as he was concerned the Goa'uld was someone else's problem. They had taken his love, raped her mind, her body and then Teal'c had stolen her life.

First as he had kidnapped her away for Apophis and then with one shot for her life. He didn't need to do that! They had made an alliance with the Tok'ra! They could have removed the 'snake' from her head and as such had removed the darkness. He could have saved her! Now even that was stolen. Daniel looked out into darkness of the ward of the base infirmary and came to one decision - he had to leave the program. This quest for exploration was no longer his goal. He would bury his wife and leave the program that had brought them together and, in the same way, tore them apart. He would let no one would change his mind.

In Another World... Many Stargates away…..

The fight out of the rather dingy bar had been, well, it had been boring really. Shoot this, duck that and all because a girl was a little, well, a lot drunk and whilst very drunk, she tried to pick the pocket of a guy who also happened to be first-prime-of-some-great-system-lord with a stick where the planets don't shine. Really it was a little bit of an accident! 'I slipped and your money happened to be in my hands' type scenario that happened accidentally on purpose. Oopsie! What is a girl to do? So, one dark haired, rather fabulous looking thief was running for her life down the first street like a bat out of someone's, well the polite phrase could be mik'ta, praying that the space port had an unlocked Tel'tac ready and waiting to be hot-wired out of there. This process also involved much colourful language which really is unbecoming in a situation like this but ever-so therapeutic when cursing your own ineptitude for getting a) caught in the act and b) getting so very drunk to let it happen in the first place. Not a good thing really.

Unfortunately, for one Vala Mal Doran it was the Tel'tac with a dodgy hyperdrive and the busted navigational system. This and some rather drunken manoeuvring had landed her on this back hole of a planet, where the level of technology wasn't up to the rest of the galaxy's standards or so she could determine from her wanderings. To her even greater distress, she was not even sure if there was a Stargate in this planet. Vala suspected that this part of the galaxy was not even aware of the world 'alien' except in their dreams. She hung low in the bushes behind the dwelling which had some strange animals behind it and a lot of sand beyond that. Where in all that was pinch-able was she?

And then there was SG-1

Jack had been livid when Daniel quit but he did not make it known openly and he was beyond disappointed in Daniel. He also understood the power of grief. Charley had made him suicidal with guilt and grief and Daniel had helped him through that during the first Abydos mission. Yet here Daniel was, separating himself from the only family willing to help him through the same level of grief. Nothing Jack could say could get Daniel to change his mind. Granted it didn't help that one member of that family had killed the other's long lost love, but that didn't mean the guy need to up sticks and quit - did it?

Jack felt that he had invested over 4 years in this rather bizarre friendship that had ultimately been one of the most dependable in his life - fireworks, annoyances and all. He watched Daniel with desperation as he began to pack up the office that had been the place they all gravitated to whether they admitted it or not. Jack had tried the 'you'll be back' speech which really evidenced itself in effect when Daniel explained how it was always about finding Shau'ri and would always be for Shau'ri that he would be stopping. His reason for living was gone and now Jack looked on in sadness as his two best friends were no longer speaking to one another. Reason for bringing the together had failed. His team was now fractured and falling apart. What could he do? There was nothing else he could do except get stuck with some schmuck who was not Daniel. Jack scratched his head and leaned back in his chair in the office he 'claimed' he knew nothing about. There was a list of candidate files for his team and he knew that not one of the met the caliber for SG-

1.

He was ordered to stop looking for Daniel's return as the general did not stop for anyone and get on with picking his new team member - yeah like that would happen. Who dictated four team members anyway?

He'd found Carter hiding in his office after they'd left Daniel's apartment. The tears dripping down her face was like pin pricks on his heart. All he could hear were whispered words of "He's gone sir. What now?" Truly he couldn't answer her because even he didn't know himself. Truly the question was - what now? Teal'c was no better as he only put his heart into doing only his duties and no more. He rarely spoke to anyone anymore - well any more than usual. Teal'c kept his presence outside of missions either in his quarters or sparring at the base gym. He ate alone in the mess unless joined by either Sam or Jack but would not even entertain anyone else's company. How could SG-1 truly carry on as SG-1 when two of its family was either burdened with guilt or grief? For that Colonel Jack O'Neill truly had no real solution.