Title: by the lines we'll trace
Disclaimer: I rightfully own nothing, so please don't sue me.
Rating: T
Summary: AU, Post Black Helicopter. "He's trying to find his place here, and in doing so, he's attempting to make you all happy. However, his idea of happiness doesn't always bring happiness at first." KF/TL
I have no reasons to be writing this, aside from the fact I'm enjoying Fischer/Lisbon's chemistry.
Holding the plastic butterfly wand between her forefinger and thumb, Kim Fischer studied the shimmery object from behind her desk. The silver plastic felt smooth against her skin and waving it around again, a small smile tugging at her lips, she wondered how one small token could fill her with so much peace and yet, allow so many ill-wrought memories to resurface.
Fischer continued to study the wand, mesmerized by the idea that a piece of silvered plastic was something she had always wished for as a child. Holding it now and waving it around, she almost felt silly (and embarrassed) for her childish behavior and wistful thinking. For a young child, desiring a wand was quite normal; after all, what child hadn't wanted to wave a wand (much like some Disney movie) and pretend they could grant wishes or be a Fairy Godmother?
As a Senior Special Agent of the FBI, however, it was both childish and uncouth.
Grimacing, she stuffed the wand in one of her desk drawers and tried to focus her attention toward her growing pile of paperwork. Fantasying about changing her situation with one little wave had been nice as a child, but as an adult, she realistically knew the plastic piece did nothing more than make little girls (and boys) feel as if they had some ambience of control.
But if she did know that, why had she still "secretly wanted" the wand?
Patrick had been right about Cho's Mexican jumping beans, Abbott's Voltron and Wylie's Tamagotchi. He had somehow figured out what they had always secretly wanted and judging by their reactions, Patrick hadn't been wrong.
Yet…
He must have been wrong about hers, because she had no secret desire for a wand anymore. She had a firearm and she could protect herself and others. Fischer didn't need a piece of plastic to make things right or keep others safe, as she was an FBI agent. She had a badge, a title and a purpose. She wasn't a child anymore and in turn, she wasn't a victim anymore either.
"I doubt he was trying to reopen old wounds, Kim," Teresa's voice caused Fischer to glance up from her empty form, her attention refocused on Teresa's presence in her office doorway. Fischer said nothing for a few minutes, before she removed the wand from her desk drawer for the purposes of their conversation. "Jane's a total ass, trust me, but he's not completely heartless. He did make Abbott smile, after all."
Fischer chuckled, half-heartedly. "I suppose you're right." She glanced back down at the wand, her fingers running over the smooth plastic again. "How does he do it?"
"It's Jane. How does he do anything?" Teresa asked, chuckling. Fischer had to admit that Teresa had a valid point; considering, she still had no idea how Patrick Jane worked. "I've asked him how he's figured out some of my inner secrets, but he refuses to answer. It makes me wonder if he can't really just read minds."
"I've never…" She motioned toward the wand, unable to find the right words to describe what she hadn't thought or said aloud for years. "He's…I…this…" Huffing in frustration, Fischer slammed one of her desk drawers and took pleasure in the loud sound. "I don't even know how to describe what I'm feeling right now, Teresa. He had no right."
"Just like he has no right leaving anybody behind?" Teresa asked and Fischer eyed her again. "Just like he has no right bullying victims or suspects? Just like he had no right leaving for two years?" Fischer slowly nodded. "Here's a word of advice regarding Patrick Jane, Kim; he's an ass."
Fischer furrowed her brows. "You said…"
"I can distinctly remember five or so times in the past twelve years, where Jane's been cruel and heartless. However, he's only been cruel to me once or twice," Teresa's facial expression darkened and Fischer wondered if she was thinking about him leaving her or something all different together. "You've only been around him for eight months and he's a changed man, supposedly." Watching the brunette roll her eyes, Fischer snorted. "But we'll see about that, now won't we?" Fischer said nothing. "He's trying to find his place here, and in doing so, he's attempting to make you all happy. However, his idea of happiness doesn't always bring happiness at first."
"Forget calling you Agent Lisbon then," Fischer commented, teasing. "We'll just call you, 'Teresa Lisbon, expert of Patrick Jane'." She watched Teresa roll her eyes again, a small smile at her lips. Fischer couldn't help but laugh at Teresa's reaction to her add-on title, even if they'd never actually use it again. "I'll take your reaction as a no?"
"More like hell no," Teresa replied and Fischer chuckled, before she waved the fellow female agent into her office to take a seat. Teresa did so, without argument or dismissal. "When I lost my Senior Agent job at the CBI, I lost all privileges of being Patrick Jane's handler. You couldn't pay me enough to try to control him again, honestly."
"I sometimes think we're making headway with him, and then, he pulls ridiculous and dangerous stunts and expects the universe to be okay with that." Fischer frowned, shaking her head. "I would think he'd be weary of all the bad karma…"
"Karma doesn't exist to Jane," Teresa responded, shrugging. "He's gotten through the past twelve years by lying, cheating, murdering, burying men alive and out-conning a serial killer. Hell, he makes me wonder if karma and common decency actually exists anymore." Fischer kept quiet. While she'd probably never understand Patrick like Teresa did, she could see where Teresa was coming from. She'd done her research on Patrick's previous cases prior to her seeking him out, and the number of stunts he had pulled in order to gain confessions had been ridiculous. It was a wonder that the CBI hadn't been under investigation prior to the FBI shutting it down, really. "He's a good man, Kim. I might not be happy that he keeps dragging me into his messes, but I'm his friend and partner. I continue to see the good in him, especially when he can't see the good in himself." Teresa smiled lightly. "I'm told my trust in him will eventually get me killed, but it's also how I know his gift to you wasn't done out of malice. He's attempting to make peace here, especially with all of the trouble he's caused lately and this is how he apologizes."
Fischer frowned. Teresa's explanation was acceptable, but she hadn't seen Patrick hand any gift over to Teresa. If he was using gifts to apologize, then in reason, shouldn't Patrick have brought Teresa a gift to say he was sorry for leaving her and for dragging her everywhere with him? "He never gave you a gift though, did he?"
"Of course he did," Teresa replied and Fischer eyed her. She hadn't seen any gift public exchange between the two of them, but that didn't mean anything. "He brought me here, which well, brought us together."
Fischer couldn't help but grin.
In the safety of her locked office and with the knowledge that Abbott had left nearly an hour ago, Fischer leaned across the desk and kissed her girlfriend of four months. "I'd say Patrick's forgiven then."
"For managing to sequester a black helicopter? No," Teresa responded, shaking her head again. "But for bringing me to Texas? It'll take more than a butterfly wand and cheap theatrics to win me over."
"Good for you that I don't have any cheap theatrics, hm?" Fischer asked, picking up the butterfly wand from her desk and waving it in Teresa's face. "I just have this pretty butterfly wand, a smile and the magical promise of food."
"You had me at food, honestly," Teresa said, still grinning as she stood from her chair and Fischer stepped around her desk to embrace her girlfriend. "Come on, I'm starving."
"Yeah?" Fischer asked, the matter of the butterfly wand forgotten. "Me too."