Would I ever be happy? Chapter 1: A new school and another beating, a twilight fanfic

I woke up again to an empty house but today I would start at Forks High School and I would be picked on, as usual but I learned that even if I fight back I would only have to leave the town sooner so I stopped fighting back now I'm just the secluded weird goth girl that sits by herself and dosen't beg the person that's beating her to stop. I lost my family a hundred years ago and the closer it gets to the date of their death, which happens to be the date of my transformation, the more reserved I get but no one knows why I get like that. It's better that they don't know what kind of monster I am. I got up and showered. I got dressed and wore my usual black jeans, black shirt, black hoodie with a crimson red dragon on it and my red sneekers then I got the keys to my jeep and headed out side only to stop and lock the front door then I headed over to my jeep.

I got in and started it up then I put it in drive and took off down the blacktop drive way and a few minutes later I hit the dirt before I saw the highway and I got on it heading for forks. I arrived at school hours before anyone except the secrateries, theachers and the principle and vice principle. I walked into the office and got the stuff I would need then I headed out to my jeep to check out my scedual.

1. Trigonomatry (junior and senior)
2. Art (junior and senior)
3. French (junior and senior)
4. English (junior and senior)
5. Gym (junior and senior)
6. Lunch (junior and senior)
7. Biology II (junior and senior)
8. Spanish (junior and senior)

I then went to my first class and when I went in I went to the front desk and talked to the teacher. Thankfully he didn't make me introduce myself and I went to the seat in the back infront of five gorgeous creatures. I realized them to be vampires and I took my seat infront of the Bronze haired vampire that looked more like a God them any creature had a right to. When the class started the first question the teacher wanted an answer to he asked me "miss Valarious. Side AB = Side AC. Draw a line from C to side AB. call that line CD. Now draw a line from B to side AC. Call that line BE. Let angle EBC = 60 degrees, angle BCD equal 70 degrees, angle ABE equal 20 degrees, and angle DCE equal 10 degrees. Now draw line DE. The question--find what angle EDC is" he asked I kept my eyes closed and everyone thought that I was asleep "80" I said opening my eyes, he was amazed "that's correct" he said 'I pulled this question from a college course, how could she have known it?' he thought.

I closed my eyes again and just let the world revole without me. When the bell rang everyone, except for the vampires, left in a hurry. The short pixie approached me from behind and tapped me on the shoulder, I got my things and turned to look at her 'her power is seeing the futur based on people's decisions' I thought to myself taking in her scent "how did you know the answer was 80?" she asked in her bell like voice "I took a few college courses" I said "cool, so what classes do you have?" she asked "Art, French, English, Gym, Lunch, Biology II and Spanish" I said, you could feel the excitment rolling off of her "that's perfect your in all of our classes. Come on we'll show you the way to Art class" she said and they took me to Art class.

When I walked in I could hear the thoughts of people 'who let the freak in?' I heard 'uugghhh... who let freakinstien in?' 'freash meat' that was the jock 'eeewww Emo in training' that was the ambacrombie whore 'oh its the new freaky weired goth girl' I had heard it all before. I saw the jock nudge the other jock next to him and I heard him whisper "today after school" and his friend nodded.

I went to the teacher's desk "Isabella Valarious" I said the teacher nodded "yes miss Valarious you can take a seat next to miss Cullen" I nodded, turning to see the little pixie bouncing up and down in her seat. I walked over and set down next to her and I took out my sketch pad and Art supplies whe n the teacher spoke up "now you can draw whatever you want" she said and I started working on my sketch.

I drew a creature that had claws, sharp canines, pirecing turquoise eyes, stood at five foot eight, had brown hair that had red in it and it was on a cliff looking out at the ocean. The moon was full and in the middle of the sky looking down at the creature. The creature's eyes held ancient sadness just like the mask of ancient sadness on its face. It was watching the waves as they crashed against each other. I suddenly felt five pairs of eyes on me and I heard someone whisper "the goth's gonna get it" I knew what that ment but I had made it to where Alice, the little pixie, wouldn't see what would happen. I felt the eyes but I kepe working on my sketch "what's that?" I heard the Blond beauty ask, I breathed and I caught her scent.

Her name is Rosalie Lillian Hale, when she was human she was engaged to a handsome man but one night she was walking all by herself, heading home from a friends house, when she saw Royce and some of his friends, they saw her and she knew that he was drunk by the way he wobbled his way over to her with his friends in toe but he started to get rough with her and she fought against him but he won and he raped her while his friends watched then they beat her and left her to die.

I almost flinched at that but I stayed calm and just kept working "its a monster" I said and flinched at that but that's what I am. A monster. I kept working untill the bell rang and then I packed up my stuff but the Ambacrombie came and pushed me onto the floor and stepped on me along with her friends and they laughed as they tramppled me. When they walked out Alice was right there holding out her hand but I picked myself up of the floor "oh my gosh are you okay? I can't believe them! The nerve" she was cusing those whores in her head "I'm used to it" they looked at me worried "it's happened before in L.A., Pheonix, Chicago and Seattle don't worry about it" I said as I made my way to french class with them following behind.

When we walked in I went to the teacher and he looked at me 'she's pretty hot for a goth kid' I heard in his thoughts and I heard Edward growl in his thoughts "miss Valarious you may sit next to mister Cullen" he said I nodded and went to sit next to Edward. The teacher turned to me "combien de soldats français sont morts dans les guerres françaises et indiennes? (how many french soldiers died in the French and Indian wars?)" he asked me "3.000 à 15.000 soldats français sont morts dans les guerres françaises et indiennes (3,000 to 15,000 french soldiers died in the French and Indian wars)" I answered, he seemed inpressed "Avez-vous jamais prendre des cours de français? (did you ever take french classes?)" he asked "Non, mais j'étais en France depuis environ cinq ans (no but I was in France for about five years)" I said.

I wasn't bothered for the rest of class and when the bell rang me and the Cullens went to English and though they had gotten a lot of facts wrong I didn't say anything when the bell rang we went to Gym. When I got out of the changing room I went and set on the bleachers with the rest of the class while we waited for Coach Clap.

When the Coach came in he said that we would be running track today. I took my spot, Alice took her spot and Rosalie took her spot. When the whistle blew we ran at a human pace and we did ten laps then the boys did ten laps then the other kids did ten laps but they were out of shape and it was funny to see them try to run all ten laps but they did and we went back to the changing room and I was the first one out. I ran to the cafateria and got my stuff the I went to an empty table and waited soon enough the rest of the school was in the building either getting their Lunch or talking to friends.

I wasn't supprised when the Cullens sat at the table next to the windows but I sat by myself in the darkest corner of the Cafateria and ate my Lunch in silence. When I finished, I got up and threw my trash away 'I didn't see her in that dark corner, I didn't even know that there was a table back in that corner' I heard Alice think "she set in that dark corner but I didn't even see her there" she whispered to the others "well Bella is a strange kid" I heard that big guy, I had cought his scent so I knew him, Emmett McCarty Cullen whispered and on instint I looked over at them and saw them looking at me, I turned my head away and averted my gaze to the ground as I headed for Biology II.

I walked in and found the teacher there asleep on his desk, I walked over to his desk "excuse me" I said he woke up and fixed his glasses 'wow what a hottie wait crap she's the new student' he looked at me "are you Isabella Valarious?" he asked "yes, where do I sit?" I asked as he handed me my book and signed my slip, he pointed to the lab table that was second from the front "you'll be sitting next to mister Cullen" he said I nodded and took my seat.

Ten minutes later the Cullens came in and took their seats. Emmett and Rosalie sat behind us while Alice and Jasper set infront of us. Fifteen minutes passed and the rest of the class piled in as the bell for the end of Lunch rang. When class started we didn't do anything but listen and when the bell rang I was up and out the door with almost inhuman speed and I hid in the girls bathroom untill everyone left.

As I made my way toward the door I got shoved and I fell down "get up you freak" I did as I was told and I got my books and put them in my bag before I zipped and buttoned it so I wouldn't lose my stuff then I made my way towards the parking lot with the two jocks following me and when I was at the top of the concrete stairs they pushed me and I rolled down the stairs and hit the pavement hard.

I didn't show any signs of pain as I tried to get up but they came over to me and started kicking me and when the one jock lifted me to my feet I knew what was comming so I braced myself as best I could without giving what I was doing away and he punched me right in the face, i stumbled back but I stayed up and they punched and hit me anyway they could untill I was on the ground again.

I wanted to get up but I knew that I would get so much worse if I did "that's what you get for comming here you freak" one of them said "heh yeah you should've stayed where you were at freak" the other one said as they started to walk of and as soon as the drove out of the lot and turned onto the highway.

I started to get up and I had a feeling that someone was watching me so I risked a glance only to see five horrified faces. I averted my gaze to the ground as I coughed up some blood and I got onto my knees before I felt a cool hand helping me up and when I saw that it was Alice I knew that I couldn't hid it anymore "Bella are you all right?" I heard Emmett ask as I bent down to get my bag.

I stood back up and spit more blood onto the ground "yeah I'm fine" I said "Bella would you come to our house?" Alice asked 'maybe Carlisle can help her' she thought "sorry but I have to get home" I said, they looked at me like I was crazy "your going home with those injuries?" Rosalie asked incredulous.

I sighed and turned towards my jeep "that's the plan" I mumbled then I felt a hand grab mine and I turned to see Alice with the puppy pout on "pretty please come with us" she begged, I let out one bitter laugh and they looked confused by my actions "Alice you could have matched my sister when it came to pouting to bad she's gone or else I would have something to go home to" I said and I took my hand out of hers as I headed for my jeep.

Then as I opened the drivers door "what do you mean by 'gone'" I sighed looking over my left shoulder as I answered "I mean dead just like my parents and the one who made me this way" I said sadly as I got in and started my jeep. I turned on my radio and I heard 'My Chemical Romance'

The Sharpest Lives

Well it rains and it pours
When you're out on your own
If I crash on the couch
Can I sleep in my clothes?
'Cause I've spent the night dancing
I'm drunk, I suppose
If it looks like I'm laughing
I'm really just asking to leave

This alone, you're in time for the show
You're the one that I need
I'm the one that you loathe
You can watch me corrode like a beast in repose
'Cause I love all the poison
Away with the boys in the band

I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

Give me a shot to remember
And you can take all the pain away from me
A kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

There's a place in the dark where the animals go
You can take off your skin in the cannibal glow
Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands
Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo

I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

I backed out of the space I was parked in half-way through the song and the Cullens pulled out and got right behind me as I pulled to a stop. thirty cars heading my way. I leaned back and sighed 'why did I have to tell them that?' I wondered as the first car passed me. I changed the station on my radio and I finally found something to calm my nerves since I didn't have any alcohol available to me at the moment.

Nickle Creek

Out Of The woods

I wish you out of the woods
And into the picture with me.
I wish you over the moon,
Come out of the question and be.

CHORUS
If this going to
Run round in my head
I might as well be dreaming.
Run round in my head

I rollercoaster for you.
Time out of mind
Must be heavenly.
It's all enchanted and wild,
It's just like my heart said
It was going to be.

CHORUS

First Verse

CHORUS

It switched to Nickle Creek

Jealous Of The Moon

Tryin' on a brand new dress
But you haven't worn the old one yet
You've come too far
To turn around now

You've given up the good fight
You're as strong as anyone
You're back where you started from
I see you're back where you started from

Starin' down the stars
Jealous of the moon
You wish you could fly
Just being where you are
There's nothin' you can do
If you're too scared to try

Drag your pretty head around
Swearin' you're gonna drown
With a beautiful sigh
And a river of lies

Starin' down the stars
Jealous of the moon
You wish you could fly
Just stayin' where you are
There's nothin' you can do
If you're too scared to try

Why don't you call me, I could save you
Together we'll find a God we can pray to
That'll take you by the hand

I hate to see a friend of mine
Laughing out loud
When she's crying inside
But you've got your pride

Starin' down the stars
Jealous of the moon
You wish you could fly
But you're stayin' where you are
There's nothin' you can do
If you're too scared to try

You're starin' down the stars
Stay where you are
You're jealous of the moon
But there's nothing you can do
If you're too scared to try

Then it switched to 3OH!3

Don't Trust Me

Black dress with the tights underneath,
I got the breath of the last cigarette on my teeth,
And shes an actress (actress),
But she ain't got no need.
Shes got money from her parents in a trust fund back east.
T-t-t-tongues always pressed to your cheeks,
While my tongue is on the inside of some other girls teeth,
T-tell your boyfriend if he says hes got beef,
That I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fucking scared of him.

She wants to touch me (Woah),
She wants to love me (Woah),
She'll never leave me (Woah, woah, oh, oh),
Don't trust a ho,
Never trust a ho,
Won't trust a ho,
Won't trust me.

X's on the back of your hands,
Wash them in the bathroom to drink like the bands.
And your setlist (setlist),
You stole off the stage,
Had red and purple lipstick all over the page.
B-b-b-bruises cover your arms,
Shaking in the fingers with the bottle in your palm.
And the best is (best is),
No one knows who you are,
Just another girl alone at the bar.

She wants to touch me (Woah),
She wants to love me (Woah),
She'll never leave me (Woah, woah, oh, oh),
Don't trust a ho,
Never trust a ho,
Won't trust a ho,
Won't trust me.

Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips.
I said, Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips.
I said, Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips.

Woah, woah, woah...

She wants to touch me (Woah),
She wants to love me (Woah),
She'll never leave me (Woah, woah, oh, oh),
Don't trust a ho,
Never trust a ho,
Won't trust a ho,
Won't trust me

It switched again to The Wreckers

Leave The Pieces
You're not sure that you love me
But you're not sure enough to let me go
Baby it ain't fair you know
To just keep me hangin' 'round

You say you don't wanna hurt me
Don't want to see my tears
So why are you still standing here
Just watching me drown

[Chorus]
And it's alright, yeah I'll be fine
Don't worry 'bout this heart of mine
Just take your love and hit the road
There's nothing you can do or say
You're gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go

You can drag out the heartache
Baby you can make it quick
Really get it over with
And just let me move on

Don't concern yourself
With this mess you've left for me
I can clean it up, you see
Just as long as you're gone

[Chorus]

You not making up your mind
Is killing me and wasting time
I need so much more than that
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

[Chorus]

Leave the pieces when you go
Oh, yeah
Leave the pieces when you go
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Leave the pieces when you go

It switched again to Whitesnake

Is This Love

I should have known better
Than to let you go alone,
It's times like these
I can't make it on my own
Wasted days, and sleepless nights
And I can't wait to see you again

I find I spend my time
Waiting on your call,
How can I tell you, baby
My back's against the wall
I need you by my side
To tell me it's alright,
'Cos I don't think I can take anymore

Is this love that I'm feeling,
Is this the love, that I've been searching for
Is this love or am I dreaming,
This must be love,
'Cos it's really got a hold on me,
A hold on me...

I can't stop the feeling
I've been this way before
But, with you I've found the key
To open any door
I can feel my love for you
Growing stronger day by day,
An' I can't wait to see you again
So I can hold you in my arms

Is this love that I'm feeling,
Is this the love, that I've been searching for
Is this love or am I dreaming,
This must be love,
'Cos it's really got a hold on me,
A hold on me...

Is this love that I'm feeling,
Is this the love, that I've been searching for...
Is this love or am I dreaming,
Is this the love, that I've been searching for...

I switched stations again until I heard Avenged Sevenfold

Scream

Caught up in this madness too blind to see
Woke animal feelings in me
Took over my sense and I lost control
I'll taste your blood tonight

You know I make you wanna scream
You know I make you wanna run from me baby
but know it's too late you've wasted all your time

Relax while you're closing your eyes to me
So warm as I'm setting you free
With your arms by your side there's no struggling
Pleasure's all mine this time

You know I make you wanna scream
You know I make you wanna run from me baby
but know it's too late you've wasted all your time

Cherishing, those feelings pleasuring
Cover me, unwanted clemency
Scream till there's silence
Scream while there's life left, vanishing
Scream from the pleasure unmask your desire
perishing

We've all had a time where we've lost control
We've all had our time to grow
I'm hoping I'm wrong but I know I'm right
I'll hunt again one night

You know I make you wanna scream
You know I make you wanna run from me baby
but know it's too late you've wasted all your time

Cherishing, those feelings pleasuring
Cover me, unwanted clemency
Scream till there's silence
Scream while there's life left, vanishing
Scream from the pleasure unmask your desire
perishing

Some live repressing their instinctive feelings
Protest the way we're built don't point the blame on me

Scream, Scream, Scream the way you would
if I ravaged your body
Scream, Scream, Scream the way you would if I ravaged

your mind

Cherishing, those feelings pleasuring
Cover me, unwanted clemency
Scream till there's silence
Scream while there's life left, vanishing
Scream from the pleasure unmask your desire
perishing

and then it went to Avenged Sevenfold

A Little Piece Of Heaven

Before the story begins, is it such a sin,
for me to take what's mine, until the end of time
We were more than friends, before the story ends,
And I will take what's mine, create what
God would never design

Our love had been so strong for far too long,
I was weak with fear that
something would go wrong,
before the possibilities came true,
I took all possibility from you
Almost laughed myself to tears,
conjuring her deepest fears

Must have stabbed her fifty fucking times,
I can't believe it,
Ripped her heart out right before her eyes,
Eyes over easy, eat it eat it eat it

She was never this good in bed
even when she was sleepin'
now she's just so perfect I've
never been quite so fucking deep in
it goes on and on and on,
I can keep you lookin' young and preserved forever,
with a fountain to spray on your youth whenever

'Cause I really always knew that my little crime
would be cold that's why I got a heater for your thighs
and I know, I know it's not your time
but bye, bye
and a word to the wise when the fire dies
you think it's over but it's just begun
but baby don't cry

You had my heart, at least for the most part
'cause everybody's gotta die sometime, we fell apart
let's make a new start
'cause everybody's gotta die sometime yeah
but baby don't cry

Now possibilities I'd never considered,
are occurring the likes of which I'd never heard,
Now an angry soul comes back from beyond the grave,
to repossess a body with which I'd misbehaved

Smiling right from ear to ear
Almost laughed herself to tears

Must have stabbed him fifty fucking times
I can't believe it
Ripped his heart out right before his eyes
Eyes over easy
Eat it eat it eat it

Now that it's done I realize the error of my ways
I must venture back to apologize from somewhere far beyond the grave

I gotta make up for what I've done
'Cause I was all up in a piece of heaven
while you burned in hell, no peace forever

You had my heart, at least for the most part
'Cause everybody's gotta die sometime, we fell apart
Let's make a new start
'Cause everybody's gotta die sometime yeah
But baby don't cry

I will suffer for so long
(What will you do, not long enough)
To make it up to you
(I pray to God that you do)
I'll do whatever you want me to do
(Well then I'll break you unchained)
And if it's not enough
(If it's not enough, If it's not enough)
If it's not enough
(Not enough)
Try again
(Try again)
And again
(And again)
Over and over again

We're coming back, coming back
We'll live forever, live forever
Let's have wedding, have a wedding
Let's start the killing, start the killing

'Cause I really always knew that my little crime
would be cold that's why I got a heater for your thighs
and I know, I know it's not your time
but bye, bye
And a word to the wise when the fire dies
you think it's over but it's just begun
but baby don't cry

You had my heart, at least for the most part
'Cause everybody's gotta die sometime, we fell apart
Let's make a new start
'Cause everybody's gotta die sometime yeah
But baby don't cry

Finally the last car pasted and I made a fast right turn and sped down the highway at a hundred mph and I saw the drive-way about tweenty minutes after I left the school. I turned right and hit the dirt then the black-top at two hundred mph and within ten minutes since I turned down the drive-way I saw the house. When I pulled up to the house I pulled into the garage and parked then I turned the jeep off and I took my books inside and did my homework then I went to my bed room got some closthes and went into my bathroom to take a shower. After I got out of the shower, I got dressed and went over to my bed and collapsed from my long tiring day.

By tomorrow my wounds would not be there and my body would be healed like it never happened.