I sit in class and sigh softly, looking over at Asriel's desk, "He hasn't been to school all week.."
Chara enter the room and I smile and wave. She glances at me, but she doesn't respond. She takes her seat in front of me and I tilt my head, "Chara, where's your brother?"
She shrugs, muttering, "Don't know."
I frown, "How do you not know where your own brother is? Did he run away or something?"
"I.. Don't.. Know.." she speaks in sharp breath, "So.. Stop.. Asking.."
When she talks like that, it makes me wonder if she does know where he is. Maybe I'm reading too much into it. I shake my head, "Chara, are you worried about him?"
She looks back at me and something in her eyes has changed. She looks forward again and lies her head down on her desk. I tilt my head, "Chara? Are you okay?"
She doesn't respond and I let her be as class begins. Around lunchtime, Muffet runs up to me, "Frisk!"
I smile at her, "Hi, Muffet, how's your bakery doing? Must be hard running a bakery while you're in high school, huh?"
She shakes her head, "Frisk, come up to the roof, it's Chara!"
My eyes widen, "Chara? What's wrong?"
Muffet grabs my hand and we run up to the roof. I see the teachers and a lot of students are here as well. We push through the crowd and I gasp, seeing Chara standing on the rail, her back to us. Muffet lets go of me and I move towards her, "Chara!"
"Stay away!" she cries, looking back at me.
Tears fall down her cheeks, her face is red and slightly swollen from crying. The wind blows her hair around her face in a mess. I take another step, "Ch-Chara.. Just.. Calm down.. Get away from there.."
Char looks forward, "No.. I.. I can't do this anymore!"
"Chara, don't!" I run up to her just as she leans forward, falling off the railing. I try to grab her, but I'm a second too late. I call out her name as I helplessly watch my best friend fall to her death. I stare in horror, tears falling down my face. Mrs. Dreemurr pulls me from the railing, "Get back, everyone, get back! Frisk, are you all right?"
"She.." I blink, "Jumped.."
Mrs. Dreemurr pulls me close, "I know, my child.. I know.."
I look up at her and she's crying, too. I curl myself into her and she tightens her grip around me. She holds me like that for a few minutes, before she sends me to class. The rest of the day goes by in a blur. As the final bell rings, I head to my locker. I open it to get my backpack, and a book falls to the floor. I lean down and pick up the book and tilt my head. The small black notebook isn't mine. I open it and on the inside cover, a name is written in the center: Chara Dreemurr.
I close the notebook and look around. No one is noticing me and I frown, Who put this in my locker? Was it a mistake, maybe? Chara's locker is right next to mine, after all. I shrug lightly and put the notebook in my backpack and I close my locker, heading for the buses. I get on my bus and sit in the back. Muffet comes and sits beside me. She smiles softly, "You okay, dearie?"
I close my eyes, "I don't know.."
She sighs, "Sorry about Chara. I didn't know her very well, but.. She was a good person from what I saw."
I nod, "She was.."
Muffet gets off the bus about ten minutes later and I just stare out the window. I keep replaying what happened with Chara earlier. She was acting weird this morning in class, and then she.. Why? I don't understand. And then there's the problem of Asriel's disappearance, too.. What does it all mean? I get off the bus and go inside. My parents aren't home yet, so I go to my room. I sit on my bed and take Chara's notebook from my backpack. I swallow lightly, "Is it wrong to read this?"
After a few minutes of just staring at the notebook, I open it. I feel guilt rising in my chest, What am I doing? This isn't mine, I shouldn't be doing this. Dead or not, Chara deserves her privacy. Doesn't she? I sigh and shake my head as I start reading, "Maybe this has some answers.."
April 10th
"I can't take it anymore. Ever since they brought Asriel home, he's been nothing but trouble for me. I swear he gets on my nerves on purpose. The way he's always smiling, it's like he's trying to make me feel bad! I know I'm not the best daughter, but I at least don't pretend to be perfect. Let's see how he likes getting in trouble for 'breaking' Mom's vase. I'll wipe that smug look off his face.
Framing him was easy, I was sure he was going to get in trouble, but he got out of it! Mom said it was an accident, and he said it wasn't him, which Dad didn't like Asriel 'lying.' It should have gotten him in trouble, but he got away with it! I will get my revenge. They will see he's not perfect. I will make sure of it. Then they'll stop getting me into trouble all the time. I hate that look Asriel gives me when I get in trouble. I want him to stop looking at me all together. His eyes make me want to strangle him.
The little brat had the audacity to come to my room and say he was fine with taking the fall for me? Stop opening your mouth! I hate your words! Go away! Go away! Go away! Go away! I can't stand to look at him, why do they like him so much? They're supposed to like me. We were just fine before they brought him here. Are they not satisfied with me anymore? Am I becoming an annoyance to them?"
April 12th
"I'm grounded. I tried to frame Asriel again, and I got caught. Mom's very mad at me, I smashed all her good china plates with the baseball bat Dad got Asriel. I'm stuck in my room now. I'm angry, it should be Asriel who gets grounded. I'm just trying to make him stop pretending to be perfect. Why am I getting in so much trouble lately? This isn't fair. We're both adopted, why do they like him so much more? Is it because he looks like them? Because he's a monster, like them?
It has to be, there's no other explanation. I'll make them see I deserve just as much love."
April 13th
"I shaved Asriel while he slept. Mom and Dad are furious with me. Asriel was crying, he's such a baby. He doesn't look that bad, okay I'm lying. He looks horrible, I can't stop laughing! He's missing so much hair and then he has random patches of fur! He looks so funny! Everyone made fun of him at school.-
I gasp, "I remember that. Asriel coming to school missing most of his fur. Everyone teased him so much. He cried the entire day. Chara comforted him, I can't believe it was her that did it to him.. This.. All this doesn't sound like the Chara I know at all.. That was on Friday, and he hasn't been back in almost a week.."
I frown and continue reading from her journal.
-Of course I had to be the great big sister that I am. So I comforted the little whelp until we got home. Then I pushed him into the mud puddle by the road once we got off the bus. He cried some more and I just go inside. Asriel follows and when he gets inside. Mom instantly gives him cookies and helps him clean up. What is it about him that makes them act like that? They don't act like that with me.
I'm still grounded, so I have to stay in my room. They must really hate me, Dad said I can't have dinner tonight because of my 'prank.' If Asriel wasn't here, they would love me again. They're replacing me with him, and I don't like it. I have to get rid of Asriel, before they throw me out in the street. But how? there has to be a way to make him go away.
I've tried getting him in trouble, they don't punish him. Do they know I'm the one doing it all? Probably. So, I have to get rid of him another way. He's driving me insane, saying how he forgives me, how he knows how I feel. He doesn't know anything about me! If he opens is mouth one more time, I swear I will sew his lips shut! I can't stand his voice, the words he says! Why can't he just go away?! Go away, damn it!"
April 14th
"I'm so fed up with my 'little brother.' I'm making him go away now. I can't it anymore. I stole Mom's huge cutting knife this morning, I'm keeping it in my backpack for now. I want to see if Asriel's blood is the same color as mine. I'll check tonight. I'm having him meet me at the park after school. We're going to play a little game. The same game all the neighborhood cats lose. They just wouldn't shut up.
Asriel just won't shut up. Why does there have to be so much noise all the time? If he would just stop talking, and let me get him in trouble.. I just want Mom and Dad to love me again. But they love him so much more now. I know it's because he looks just like them. And I'm just a stupid human girl. They'll love me now. They have to, because Asriel will be gone. They'll love me again. They will, right?"
April 15th
"Asriel is gone. Mom's knife is ruined now. Asriel didn't bleed. I stabbed him thirty times, and he cried and screamed, but he never bled. He did something else instead. He turned to dust. That fascinates me. I put all his dust in a little box and I put in my backpack. Mom and Dad are very worried that Asriel didn't come home. I tell them I don't know anything, that I last saw him at lunch. I finally get away with something."
April 16th
"Everyone keeps asking where Asriel is. I say 'I don't know' and they leave me alone. Well, they all do except for Frisk. He keeps bothering me. He keeps talking to me and I just want to be left alone. Everyone keeps telling me how sad they are for my family because of Asriel's 'disappearance.' I don't care, I just want Mom and Dad to love me again.
Mom and Dad are just sad. They shoo me away when I try to talk to them. Don't they love me now? Asriel is gone. I don't understand. What am I doing wrong? Why won't they love me, even now? I just want them to love me again. Why won't they love me again? It's Asriel's fault. He made them stop loving me, and even though he's gone, they still love him more! It's not fair! It's not fair!
What more do I have to do? Maybe I should give them the box of Asriel's dust I keep in my backpack. No, I can't do that, then I'll get in trouble. They'll definitely not love me if they know I made him go away. I know, I'll draw them pictures of us as a family, they love it when I do that. They put all my drawings on the fridge. Well, they put Asriel's up there, too. Maybe I should take those down, they'll just get in the way of my drawings."
April 17th
"Why does Frisk keep asking about Asriel? Better yet, why does he keep talking to me? I don't like him, I've told him that before. Why does he insist on getting on my nerves? I suppose he's just being friendly, but he's getting annoying. I'll just ignore him from now on. Maybe he'll just go away. He won't go away. He keeps trying to talk to me, he keeps talking about Asriel. It's making me sick.
I hated Asriel, so why am I feeling so bad about making him that pretty dust? Maybe carrying it around is making me crazy. That has to be it. That has to be. I don't want to get rid of the dust, it's very pretty, it sparkles. I don't care that it came from a little kid that called me 'big sister' I just want to put it into a snow globe. I think I will, we're making snow globes in art class. Yeah, I'll make Asriel into a pretty snow globe.
I made Asriel into a pretty snow globe. I'm going to put it on my dresser, no one else will know it's Asriel, but I will. That makes it much more beautiful. This Asriel can't annoy me with its kind, perfect words. Mom and Dad will start loving me again soon. Then we can all forget about Asriel. No on will forget about Asriel. Why do they keep asking about him?! I tell them I know nothing, but they keep asking!
I want the world to go away now."
April 18th
"Why won't they love me? Mom and Dad don't talk to me, everyone at school keeps asking about Asriel. Everyone loves Asriel. Why doesn't anyone love me? No one wants to love me, they all just want Asriel to come back. Well he won't! He's gone, he's a fucking snow globe now! Everyone would rather love a snow globe than me! Fine, don't need to be here. If no one loves me, I should go away. I know Asriel hates me now. I see him every time I close my eyes now, I want to ignore it, but I have to write it down, I'm not crazy. He's mad at me, he's haunting me. He doesn't like that I made him into a snow globe. You have to be a snow globe though, Asriel. Your dust is just so beautiful. You'll forgive me, though, right? I'm still your big sister.
I don't think he forgives me, and no one asks how I'm doing, they only ask for Asriel's safety. Why won't anyone love me? That's all I want, so why? If Asriel hadn't come along and stolen Mom and Dad's love, I wouldn't be going away. It's all his fault. He should never have come. I'll never forgive you, Asriel!
I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llneverforgiveyou!I'llnever-
I drop the notebook, tears run down my face. I cover my face with my hands, "Oh, my god! Chara murdered him!"
I sit there on my bed for almost an hour, just crying. I finally wipe my tears and I pick the book up off the floor. I open it again and shudder. The remaining two pages are filled with more "I'llneverforgiveyou!" so I close the book again. I go downstairs and my parents still aren't home from work so I leave the house. Mrs. Dreemurr lives down the road, I can make it back home before Mom and Dad. I just have to show her Chara's journal. Chara is not the girl I thought I knew. I called her my best friend, and she didn't even like me. At least I was just unliked by her, Asriel was hated by her. She turned his remains into a freaking snow globe for crying out loud. I don't think her parents will take to that very well. I don't want to sick around to find out. I'm going to give over the notebook, then go home.
I knock on their door and Mrs. Dreemurr opens it. She smiles warmly at me, "Good evening, Frisk. Is there something I can help you with? Do you need help with the homework?"
I swallow and hold the notebook out to her, "This.. Is some of Chara's journal.. I.. I think you should read it. There's.. Things you don't know about her.."
She takes the journal, looking curious, and also worried, "Have you read it?"
I nod slowly, "Just.. You need to hear it from her.. Read her words.. I'll.. See you tomorrow.."
I turn and run down the road before she can call me back. I hear her call my name, but I ignore her as tears run down my face again. It's not right for me to tell. She has to understand Chara first. Even if the words on the page are obviously insane, she still needs to hear it from the source. I get back home and run to my room. I sit on my bed and stare out at the setting sun. I see my parents' car pull in and I sigh, closing my eyes, "I never should have read it.. I should have just given it to Mrs. Dreemurr when I had the chance.."