Ba'al vs The Meaning of Halloween

Ba'al didn't understand the concept of Halloween. He'd asked his brother, but Harry was too busy stowing fake dog turd, his cloak of invisibility, several rolls of toilet paper, and a plastic bag full of smelly fish heads into his back pack. Not really wanting to know what Harry had planned for his "supplies" – he preferred to distance himself from Harry's outlandish exploits – Ba'al had turned to his father for guidance.

"Halloween?" his daddy had said in the kind of tone that meant he really didn't want to answer. Folding the top of his morning newspaper down, he peered out at Ba'al over the top and huffed, "If you really must know, it's a tradition my great, great, great, great, uncle Eamon O'Neill – twice removed on my father's side of the family - brought with him from old Ireland when he migrated. Quite the tradition makers, we O'Neill's are. Nothing you need to be worried about though. Where are your brothers?"

Ba'al shrugged. He knew where Harry was. His older brother having shouldered his back pack, mumbled something about Teal'c and a Unas mask, grabbed hold of his slipper – apparently is was a portkey for teleporting him anywhere he wanted – and slammed the bedroom door, leaving Ba'al alone in the hall. Secretly, Ba'al doubted the old slipper could do anything other than keep Harry's foot warm, and if he waited a few moments, he'd find the bedroom empty, the window open, and Harry gone.

Daddy was going to be pi… miffed.

Of Daniel, Ba'al had no idea. To his thinking, Daniel was a strange boy who preferred the company of his pet rock, Stanley, and constantly mumbled in a variety of languages Ba'al had no hope of understanding. At first, he thought it was some sort of secret code and perhaps Harry might have understood him, Harry being a spy and all, but Harry had merely shrugged, twirled an air circle by his ear and mentioned something about returning Daniel to his padded cell.

Strange, Ba'al thought, because there weren't any padded cells in their house.

So, his father and siblings were no help to him. What was a god to do? Being all knowing and terribly important, Ba'al stole into the study and stood in front of his father's computer.

"Computer," he commanded in his best authoritative tone. "Tell me the meaning of Halloween."

The little curser on the screen blinked at him. Ba'al blinked back. Perhaps he needed some secret word to activate it?

"Open sesame?"

The curser continued to blink.

"Umm… Daryl?" Nothing. Odd… it worked for Vala. Moving in close, Ba'al peered darkly at the screen… and then it dawned on him. The answer! The reason why the computer wouldn't respond! Leaning on the small keyboard, he cried out, "Ganos Lal!" and the screen lit up.

"Pfft! That was easy. Computer! Tell me the meaning of Halloween!"

Again, nothing. He'd tried all the secret words he knew. His best glare had failed. What else was he to do?

Well… there was one thing he hadn't tried.

He could ring Aunty Sam and ask her.

The End