"Are we through here yet?"
John Watson paused outside the morgue doors, taken aback by the terse question posed on the other side. Molly only used that tone when Sherlock reached new levels of insulting. Something John would rather not be a part of today, thank you very much.
"No."
The quick quip from the dark man simply made the man listening in roll his eyes.
"I want to go home." Molly implored.
"No one is stopping you."
"I want to go home with my wife." Molly's final sentence stopped John short. It was all fine with him, but he had no idea Molly was even seeing anyone, let alone married, and to another woman at that.
"Ah well, then something is stopping you. I'm not going. Home is boring."
What? Was she implying Sherlock was her wife? John must have misheard, and dismissed that bit outright... He knew Baker Street wasn't quite the same since he married Mary, but there had been 3 triple murders in the last month, they've been staying quite busy.
"Yes, well I have work to do there-"
"You're getting along just fine here with your work! Look at all the dead people!"
"-and your mummy is getting on my last BLOODY nerve!"
"Yes, well Mycroft never got over you stealing me."
John recalled Sherlock's comment in Buckingham Palace about his childhood with Mycroft and snorted softly.
He was truly afraid to enter the morgue now since the argument only seemed to be getting more heated... Wait, 'stealing me'?
Molly scoffed. "I didn't steal you, and you full well know it. You wanted to explore, see new things, play with Toby."
"Toby is much more fun to play with at home."
"Yeah, he's getting bitter having only one head... and being a cat."
Sherlock chuckled low.
"You know I love you, and I miss you" Molly continued. John was surprised at her candidness. He knew, pretty much the whole world knew, but that Sherlock knew was a surprise.
"Where was that love when Jim was around?" He spat out Moriarty's name as if it were pure poison, which quite frankly it was.
"I've apologized for that, but he would bring me the nicest collection of dead. I swooned a little, but when he started going after you I put an end to it right quick."
"YOU put an end to it? I had to jump off a roof and play dead for years!"
"Do you really think he would have put that gun in his mouth without my influence? And I know you played dead for years darling, I made it so... Can we please go home now?"
"What about John?"
"You'll get to see him again in a decade or so. If you really miss him terribly I'll have a little chat with the fates, they owe me."
John's mind had blanked as the conversation had gotten more and more impossible, but at the mention of his name he tried desperately to catch the threads.
"You promise?"
"Of course my love."
"Fine, let's go home."
"Excellent, I'll grab Toby, he's going to be so excited!"
"What should I tell Mycroft?"
"You're mummy has had you long enough, my turn now. You aren't her darling little virgin, we've been married for millenia, Mycroft can suck it."
Sherlock and Molly then walked out the door and passed John.
"Ah, yes, John. I've finished the last case, but I have some things to sort out at home, bit don't worry I'll see you soon" he turned to look at Molly with the end of the statement.
"Yes, soon..." she said, rolling her eyes before grabbing his hand and pulling him toward the doors.