Hello and welcome to another wonderful installment of boredom produced by my eternally sub-conscious mind. Your host, lord, and mistress, PhAnToM PhIrE! Round of applause, folks!

::silence::

Fine, be assholes. ::mutters:: anyway, this a brand new epic whatever-you-call'ms fanfic—a parody on Chobits using the Inuyasha characters. ^^ I think I've seen one other fic with a similar plot, but they haven't updated for god knows how long, so yeah. Salutations to whoever came up with this idea first. ^^;;;

Disclaimer: This thing is STILL here?? I would think after writing 19-20 or so fanfics that this stupid thing would leave me alone!! T_T  GAAAAH!! FINE! I. Do. Not. Own. Inuyasha. NOW GO AWAY! ::kicks disclaimer away::

Gold Eyes on Me

By: Phantom Phire

Chp. 1—One man's trash is another man's treasure

My name's Kagome Higurashi. I'm college student, and I go to Tokyo U with my friends, Miroku, Rin and Ayame. I don't have many friends—actually, they're the only ones. I have okay grades. . .

…But I'm almost dead broke.

So, after I get out from classes and on the days I don't have any I work at the nearest WacDonalds. I barely get anything, but most of the time I can feed myself at the college.

I don't really care about all the fancy equipment and crap everyone, including Miroku. I have a old-fashioned lap top.

Everyone else has their "Youkai".

"Youkai" are the latest thing in computer technology—bodyguards for important people, with computerized minds. When they first came out, only really rich people could afford to get one—with the latest update in tech, Youkai are becoming more common, even with those huge prices.

Youkai can be custom made, but usually people buy the more common ones available in the nearest store—they're usually Fox, Cat, and Dog Youkai. The rarest of them are definitely the Dragon, Falcon and Wind.

From what I see, Youkai can not only protect you, but they protect your important stuff as well, either by you giving them the physical material to hold onto, or installing it inside their database.

I don't really know much at all about Youkai. Almost all my friends have one—Miroku does, although I've never seen it, Ayame is saving up for a custom model, and Rin has one named Sesshomaru. I haven't seen him either.

Miroku is the one that practically knows everything there is to know about Youkai. Give him a Youkai ID code, and he can tell when and where it was created. Kinda sad in my mind, but he's infatuated with computers and woman. Kinda surprises me that he didn't buy a female Youkai.

"Hey! Kag-chan!" I look up at the sound of my name. A red-head with brilliant green eyes comes running over—Ayame.

"Oh, hi Ayame! What's up?"

"Kagome, you will not believe this!" The girl was practically jumping in excitement, and since we were in the library she settled for twitching nervously and in what looked like determination.

I rolled my eyes. "I think I can handle it, Ayame-chan. What's going on?"

"I finally have enough money! Isn't this so cool!? The model I ordered is already at home, c'mon!" Ayame grabbed my arm and started tugging me to the door, solidly ignoring my protests as I attempted to grab my books and stuff. "C'mon! Rin's gonna be there with her Youkai to help me set it up!"

"Okay, okay, just hold up already!"

Before I knew it, Ayame had somehow dragged me all the way to her house, kicking the door open as she ran like a tornado.

"Jeez Ayame, slow down already!" I panted as I slumped over trying to catch my breath. It was obvious I wasn't too good at anything that required physical movement.

"C'mon!" Ayame replied impatiently for the tenth time. Sighing, I followed her as she lead me to her living room. "Hi Rin!"

"Hi Ayame, Kagome. Ready to set up your Youkai up?" Rin smiled as we entered the room.

"Yeah, sure." I sighed half-heartedly. More scientific stuff I wouldn't understand.

"You bet!" Ayame exclaimed in feverish excitement.

"Okay, I know how to get your Youkai running, Ayame, but I don't know any of the customizing stuff, like naming him. And I don't know his stats, so we'll have to hook Sesshomaru up to him later." Rin smiled as Sesshomaru turned to us. Rin came from a wealthy family in the western lands, and one of the technicians had built her Sesshomaru, based on a character from a story. The tall, silver-haired youkai kind of creeped me out. His eyes were lifeless, and his tone was empty. "Anyway," Rin continued, breaking my train of thoughts, "Your Youkai is supposed to come with an owner's basic instruction manual, access keyboard, and ID code. The on switch is at the back of the neck—you'll have to make your own password so no one can hack into him."

Ayame reached up to grab a thick booklet that sat on the couch besides her youkai. It was yet another male; He had long black hair tied up, perched at the top of his head, and wore dark brown, furry clothes. He had strong-looking legs but thin claws, and a brown tail poked out from behind him.

I sat in silence feeling incredibly stupid and, of course, jealous. I really, really, wanted a Youkai. They're supposed to act on your will. Derive orders from you mind and emotions. I've seen them since I was four years old and went shopping with my mom and my baby brother. From that day, all I wanted and dreamed of was having a Youkai of my very own one day. I want a dog—one that was loyal and faithful. Cats tended to be smart, smooth and friendly only to their masters; Foxes bonded only to people their programming told them they could trust. High-rarity Youkais probably were fierce to anyone but their master, since they were rarely seen outside of those giant estates with the green lawns and crap. I learned all this from, of course, Miroku, but then I started drifting off when he started rambling on and on and on and on and on…well yeah, babbling something about IP addresses and more nerdy-techy-stuff.

I watched as Ayame nervously reached for the Youkai's neck with trembling fingers. There was a loud click and heavy silence—before the youkai sat up straight, eyes still closed, hands folded in his lap.

Ayame broke the silence first. "That was…disappointing…."

"Well, what did you expect?" Rin choked out from amidst gales of laughter. I swear I saw Sesshomaru crack a smile…

"Kinda…like…a boom or something…."

"Well, you still have to enter the ID Code in before you can actually do anything. See that tiny outlet behind his ear?" Rin came over to where Ayame was crouched to point it out. "Plug the wire on the access keyboard there," She said.

Ayame fumbled with the heavy cord for a minute before successfully plugging it. The green lights on the side of the machine flickered to life as a small blank screen popped up, suspended in air like those hologram-things in all cheesy sci-fi movies of old. "Now just type in the ID Code," Rin instructed. "It'll take you to a different screen where it'll ask you what you want to name him—and your password."

After a few minutes Ayame finally sat back, looking satisfied. We watched in silence as the youkai's eyes slowly opened, revealing them to be a shade of ice blue. His eyes flickered for a moment before he stood. He looked left, right, straight at me, then bowed and said, "Hello, Mistress. My name is Kouga."

Ayame's jaw dropped open and I think my eyes bulged out while Rin started laughing her ass off. "Ayame," she choked out yet again, somehow managing not to suffocate herself, "You forgot to enter you User information!"

"Oh, great," I moaned as Kouga looked at me expectantly with wide, blank eyes.

Ayame groaned in frustration before yanking the cord out on the access keyboard and plugging it back behind Kouga's ear, where he let out a startled yelp and pulled away.

"You're not my mistress. You do not have permission to access my data." Kouga glared suspiciously at Ayame, who was about to scream in frustration.

"Here, Ayame," Rin said kindly, pulling out her own access keyboard. "You can enter in your information in Sesshomaru, and we'll transfer it to Kouga." She beckoned forward the silent Youkai, who obediently bent down just far enough so that Rin could plug in the cord, but she was still too short. "Eh….Kagome, help?" She asked weakly.

Laughing, I took the cord from her and reached up, sticking it into the socket. Surprisingly, Sesshomaru's flesh felt warm, not at all like I expected a machine resembling a human to feel like. Warm and soft, rather than cold and hard.

"Shut up, Ayame," Rin said irritably to Ayame, who was giggling uncontrollably. She shoved the keyboard at her glumly, plopping on the couch as she did so. "I can't help the fact I'm short."

This comment made both of us burst out laughing again, and when it subsided to chuckling Ayame finally picked up the Keyboard and started tapping away.

"User info….Name….Ayame Miyamoto….age…eighteen…address…" She continued to whisper softly to herself as Sesshomaru stood, eyes flickering as he processed the information. "Done!" She exclaimed triumphantly.

Rin woke up and yawned. "Sesshy-kun, please transfer that data to Kouga-san," Rin stretched as the dog-youkai nodded and complied, pulling a long white wire from behind his other ear and approaching Kouga, who refused to let him near him. "You do not have permission to connect," he spoke with the same bland tone.

Ayame sighed in exasperation again as she slumped down against the couch and Rin burst out again. "Kagome, since he thinks he's yours, command him!" She said irritably.

I sighed. "Kouga-san, allow sesshomaru-san to connect," I commanded. All this computer stuff was giving me a headache.

Kouga immediately went still and Sesshomaru plugged in. For a few moments, both eyes went blank, whirling at incredible speeds as data passed between the two Youkai. A moment later, Sesshomaru pulled out his cord and abruptly stalked over behind Rin.

Kouga turned to the proper Ayame this time and once again bowed. "Hello, Mistress. My name is Kouga."

Ayame glanced over at Rin. "Aren't these supposed to have some sort of personality?" Ayame asked.

"Sure." Rin shrugged and sent a backward glance at Sesshomaru. "He'll get one in a few moments. Personalities are pre-designed, and randomly picked."

Kouga suddenly twitched before a fanged smile curled onto his face and he stood in a much more cocky stance. "So, what're we doin' today, Mistress? Going out for a run?"

Ayame's mouth dropped open yet again—funny, really—and then she laughed, leaping forward and hugging Kouga tightly. "It's Ayame," she told the Youkai. "Just Ayame."

I sighed wearily as I trudged down the dark street. It had taken more time to both persuade Sesshomaru and Kouga to reconnect and find more about the custom model. Luckily for her, Ayame wasn't paying attention and Rin was too busy sitting in the corner, laughing at Sesshomaru's flustered face as he attempted to both connect and dodge the swiping blows of Kouga.

I really want a youkai. I'm so jealous of Ayame-chan! I should be happy for her, really... I sighed yet again as I turned a corner, full blown migraine racing around waving little flags in my head.

Maybe it'll get better, I thought ironically, maybe there'll be a letter from mom and Souta, or Kikyo will have baked more cookies and bring'm over….mmm…cookies…

Kikyo was the landlady of the apartment I lived in. She was really nice, even if a bit distant, and she baked great chocolate chip cookies.

Chocolate… ^_^

I turned left at a street light, deciding to take a shortcut through the allies. Nothing ever happened; this was the good side of Tokyo…assuming there was one. I snorted and passed by a trash heap.

Then did a double take.

I looked in amazement at the pile of crap. I was positive I saw something move before—something that twitched. Great, Kagome, now you're delirious, I thought. You're seeing things. Excellent. Maybe all that homework you didn't do will disappear, too…

I turned around, on my own little homework-weighted-down way, when I saw something move again. Instantly, I froze, and stared at the piles of trash bags and old furniture tossed out. There was something sticking out…something…white?

Homework. Homework. Homework. Hooooomewooork… The inner mantra trampled all over my mind, but curiosity prevailed and promptly squished it. Hesitantly, I stepped over and reached to touch the white things—

To my surprise, it was something warm and fuzzy—it felt like an ear. It twitched under my hand, but nothing else happened.

Maybe it's a dog, I thought. Buried under the trash. I reached for the nearest bad, gathered what little strength I had left and heaved it off the pile, which, in truth, moved about three inches, but it was okay, since the pile wasn't that high anyway.

The sight that met my eyes was what made me lose concentration on the heavy bag and promptly drop it on my foot.

"Itai!" I winced, hopping around on one foot before my attention focused back to the thing I'd found.

It was a boy.

A sleeping boy, dressed in rags of what was most likely a red, old-fashioned yukata. His arms lay, tied behind his back with heavy twine, though is legs were free. His face looked oddly blank, and he had long, silver hair. Where the fluffy white ears sat on top of.

Wait…

People don't have ears like that…

Excitement suddenly started building up in me and my heart started beating faster. I can't believe! I honestly can't believe it! A youkai! A real youkai! I touched the boy's arm, but there was no response. Of course there isn't, you moron, I mentally slapped myself. This Youkai had been abandoned in trash pile…

…which meant…

I could have him!

In feverish excitement, I picked up the boy's arm and flung it over my shoulder and settling the limb between the back of my neck and the backpack straps. With the other arm I grabbed hold of his waist and started home. God only knew how heavy he was.

By the time I reached my small, three-room apartment I was worn out. I eased down the Youkai onto my futon and then dumped my backpack to the floor. If I wanted to start up the youkai, it would be easy, with the small exception…

I didn't know Anything about them!

Which led me to the conclusion…

…to call Miroku and force him over!

I grabbed the cell phone from the table I had left it on and punched in his number, tapping my foot impatiently as I waited for the stupid pervert to pick it up.

"Moshi moshi?" Miroku's tired sounding voice came over the line.

"Hey, Miroku. I need you to come over as fast as you can."

"Kagome, it's past ten—oh my, you want that? You naughty little girl you—"

"Shut up!" I barked in the phone, a blush covering my cheeks as I realized how ridiculous that had sounded. "Just get your ass over here!"

"Itai, don't scream so loud," he winced over the phone. "Hai, hai, I'll come over right away, Sir." He promptly hung up before I screamed his bloody ears out…

Five minutes later, there was a knock at the door. I pulled it open and Miroku appeared, still looking weary and as if he had pulled on his clothes in three seconds, judging by the rumples.

"Kagome-sama, what do you need help with?" He asked.

"Knock it off with the –sama crap. I need help with this…thing."

"Oh really? What thing?" Curiosity piqued, he stepped in and closed the door.

"Well, I found this Youkai and—"

"Did you say Youkai?" His dark purple eyes lighted up at the mention of his favorite subject. "Since when did you have anything to do with Youkai? Kagome-sama?"

I smacked his arm and glared at him. "Like I was saying," I continued. "I found a youkai. And I need help getting it to work."

The silence was almost tangible before…

"YOU FOUND A YOUKAI?" The force of his yell could've knocked me over, I swear…

"Yeah, and don't scream so freakin' loud," I answered, hands still clamped over my ears.

"Where is it?!" The poor boy was almost jumping in excitement.

"Over here," I walked over and crouched next to my futon, where the Youkai lay sprawled. "I heard from Rin how to fire him up, but I don't know anything else," I told him.

"Did you even try turning him on? He could be someone else's Youkai, you know," Miroku said, eying me warily.

My heart sank before I remembered where I found him. "But I found him in the garbage, with his hands tied up," I protested. It had taken me several minutes to undo the thick knots and even more time to heft the boy up.

Miroku rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Let's try it out. Flip on the switch on the back of his neck," he instructed just like Rin had.

I reached for the Youkai's neck and felt around, but there was no switch. I looked at Miroku, who, obviously puzzled, replied, "Well? What're you waiting for?"

"Em…there's no switch…" I explained to him.

His eyes widened, then narrowed. "That can't be possible!" he declared. "Every Youkai model has a switch! And they're all supposed to be in the same place!"

While he started rambling about quantum mechanics and similar theories or something like that I kinda spaced out. Idly, my hand moved of its own accord to stroke the ears—and then I felt something bumpy under my fingers. Leaning forward, I saw a tiny switch—a obvious on and off switch, hidden behind his ears. "I found it!" I told Miroku triumphantly, which, thank god, shut him up.

To my surprise, instead of the Youkai acting like Kouga had and just sitting up with closed eyes, those eyelids slowly rose, revealing bright golden eyes. His silver hair fanned out around him as he sat up, looking at me, before shaking his head and cocking it. "Feh."

[A/N: The FEH! Oh yeah, it's back! XD]

My mouth dropped open and before I knew it, that Miroku started going off about how this was impossible, against regulations and mandatory procedures, yada yada…

His eyes bore into mine and he slowly blinked. "Feh….?"

"Is that the only sound you can make?" I asked the youkai in awe as it scratched its ear, still staring at me in obvious wonder. I reached out to scratch his furry ear—I always wanted a pet before with furry ears—and his eyes went wide, filled with golden light, unlike Kouga's ice blue, blank eyes, and Sesshomaru's dull, similar golden eyes with no emotion. A rumbling purr-like sensation shivered through his body as he nuzzled his head into my touch, making me laugh as it tickled my fingers.

"HOW CAN THIS BE?!" Both of us turned and looked at Miroku, who was sobbing pitifully as he twitched. "This is all out of order!"

"Eh…Miroku…. You alright?" I asked cautiously.

He was up, grinning in my face and looking happier than ever in three seconds, as if a moment before he hadn't been rolling on the floor sobbing over his broken theories. "Better than ever Kagome-chan!" He replied cheerily.

"Kag…k-kagome?" The Youkai sounded out my name carefully, like tasting a new dish. He looked at me with again with renewed interest. "Kagome."

"Wow! He said my name!" I squealed giddily. This was turning better than I thought! It worked, and it was really cute! With ears!

Miroku glanced at me before looking back to the Youkai. "Is it okay if I try to find out what model he is?" He asked.

"Sure." I shrugged and stepped back as Miroku reached towards the youkai, who promptly flinched, his lips tugging up in a snarl, making Miroku fall back on his heels.

"Uh…"

I reached out and started rubbing the Youkai's ears again. He immediately relaxed and allowed Miroku to touch him, but his eyes remained trained on the teenage guy as he pulled up his sleeve slightly. "No code number. Every youkai is supposed to be stamped with a number…" Miroku frowned. "From his basic body build though, and judging by those fangs and claws, it's a Dog Youkai."

"Sweet!" I pondered over a name for him. I couldn't just calling him 'the youkai'. "I know! I'll call you Inuyasha!" I said cheerfully.

Inuyasha looked up at me, and a spark seemed to whirl in his eyes, just like Sesshomaru's and Kouga's when they were processing information. Then a smile lit his face and he twisted, hugging me tightly. Miroku started laughing and I gave him the magic finger before hugging back Inuyasha.

"Is it okay if I try to plug Shippo in, see if I can find anything else in his systems?" Miroku asked when Inuyasha finally pulled away, sitting on the futon and looking around, occasionally making that "feh" noise.

"Sure." I reached over and scratched his ears once more. "Hey, Inuyasha, Miroku-kun is going to try to find out more about you, okay?"

To my amazement, he nodded shaking his head to allow greater access to his ears. Miroku reached into his pocket and withdrew what looked like a tiny fox demon. "Hey!" he whispered, prodding the tiny Youkai. "Shippo! Wake up!"

Shippo abruptly stood, eyes a bright teal color, flashing as he woke up. "Hi, Master Miroku!" He sang out cheerfully. "At your service, rain or shine! Ready to work, at any time!"

I sent a look at Miroku. "Master Miroku? What's with the rhymes? And how come I've never seen such a tiny Youkai?"

Miroku shrugged. "He's programmed that way. As for size, he's a mini build—smaller size youkai, but bigger price. Mushin gave it to me as a college present. It makes me feel important!" I rolled my eyes as he started speaking to the small fox. "Okay, Shippo! Let's get to work. I want you to connect to Inuyasha." He pointed at Inuyasha and Shippo nodded, pull a small cord out of his ear and leaping off Miroku's shoulder.

"Hi Inuyasha!" The small fox cried, leaping onto his head and plugging the cord down into his fuzzy ears. Shippo was about the size of Inuyasha's fist. He leaped off the top of his head, settling on his shoulder. "I'm gonna search your databanks okay? Okay!" The fox fell silent as his eyes went blank and began whirling, the same time as Inuyasha's half-lidded eyes went. He started speaking in a flat monotone. "Inuyasha. Dog Demon. Created January 12th, 1989. Zero personal logins. No record of previous own--" suddenly the small youkai keeled over, his eyes completely shutting and the cord yanking from Inuyasha's ears.

Inuyasha himself suddenly twitched eyes shooting open all the way, golden light seeming to emit from his body. Suddenly, all the lights shot out, blanketing the room in darkness, and a few minutes later, a scream rose from the streets as crowds of people began shouting to each other that their Youkai had shut down.

"I-Inuyasha!" I screamed. She reached out in the darkness and came in contact with a clawed hand—and suddenly all the lights came back on. Inuyasha was standing, eyes still golden but his expression was different—a tiny scowl. His eyes no longer held the innocent golden light of before, but instead some of that light and burning eyes.

"Kag…Kagome…" His voice rose to the rafters, still holding Kagome's hand, neither noticing Miroku cry over Shippo, who was still presumably "dead". Are knocked out.

"Inuyasha? Are you alright?" I asked.

"I t-think so…"

It suddenly hit me how very odd this sounded.

"Y-You can speak?!"

"Well duh. I'm programmed to." He scowled, releasing my hand and letting his drop to the side. "What's with him?" Inuyasha looked over at Miroku, who stared at him, still cradling Shippo in his palm.

"That's Miroku," I introduced, feeling incredibly stupid.

"…" Inuyasha made no sound, just looked away. "Feh."

I rolled my eyes and pulled Miroku to his feet. "Your clothes are rags," I directed to Inuyasha, who blinked back. "Miroku, can you lend him some of your clothes?" I asked.

"Uh…s-sure…" Miroku answered in a stupefied manner. He pocketed Shippo and started walking out. "My apartment's down on the first floor—c'mon." He still wanted to know about Inuyasha.

I smiled at Inuyasha who still looked puzzled, all remains of the scowl he had been wearing erased. "C'mon Inuyasha," I said, grabbing his arm and tugging him forward. "Let's go!"

"Go where?" Inuyasha looked confused. "Hey—what's that?" He poked a mirror that hung in the hallway, which I put there so that I could get out faster.

I remembered I had just woken up this Youkai. It wouldn't know anything besides the name of itself and its master—just like Kouga. I sighed.

There was going to be a lot to teach Inuyasha…

To be continued!

So how was that? Undeniably the longest thing so far that I have written. Twelve pages Microsoft word style. X3 I hope that sounded okay… what'd ya think? ^^;;;

I managed to get this up, cuz mom is out with my dad doing some shopping—so, overall, I've written this thing on a school night, waiting for dad to get home to make him paraphrase a poem thing for me, and I was bored. This took about fifteen minutes to write—the idea was there, the typing took longer X3

Anyway, that's all I have to report for now so yeah…

Please review!

~Phantom Phire