Any Given Day
By Tricia aka Enchanted Ivy
Rated: PG13
disclaimer: isn't there a one word thing I can put here instead of writing 'none of there characters belong to me' every single time?
Archived: Oh! Oh! Come to my site at http://www.geocities.com/area51/underworld/6643
Note: my attempt to answer TragedyAnn007's cheesy 'fic challenge. Hope it's cheesy enough!

"No! Not this place again!" Spike whined in protest.

"It's the Bronze! The ONLY social place in town. Typical you don't like it…" Buffy tried to drag him in the door of the familiar club with Willow, Xander and Anya behind them

"It gives me really bad memories."

"Of what, Spike? The guy you were torturing didn't scream loud enough?" Xander suggested.

"No. This is where I first saw the Slayer and met YOU."

Peacemaking Willow tried to make them both shut up.

"Come on you guys! We never get a break, fighting evil and all. This is our one night of nightmare free fun!" Suddenly, all the doors were slammed shut by figures wearing dark cloaks. One whom seemed to be the leader, stood on the stage as he took off his hood.

"Aahhh! Willow, you spoke too soon. This is DEFINETLY a nightmare." Xander spoke as he saw the man's face.

"Oh! This is horrible!" Anya agreed with him. "Hold me Xander. I command you!" They both went over to a corner and made out, forgetting about the crisis at hand.

"Is this a joke?!" Spike didn't believe this was real. Standing in the popular teen hangout club, holding everyone hostage, were a hundred, no, a THOUSAND Urkel-wannabes!! He turned to the Slayer and was amuses by what he saw.

Buffy hardly heard a word of what her friends were saying. She just stood there, face white, wide eyed and scared silly.

"Slayer, are you okay?" Spike couldn't help but laugh at her expression.

"I…please…childhood memories…no…" Buffy muttered and made no sense to Spike. He was getting worried so he tried to ask Willow only to find her…

"RED! Are you asking that Urkel wannabe for his autograph?! What's happening here?!"

Willow looked ashamed as she took the napkin and pen back from one of the Urkel wannabe's. Xander, hearing what Spike said, decided to tell them something about Willow that no one knew.

"She had a crush on the original Urkel. I think it's a mental disease. She had a song and announced to everyone that she was going to marry him." Everyone but the Urkel-wannabe's and Willow started laughing hysterically.

"Hey! One time! At band camp!" They just laughed harder.

"Ha! This is better than Passions! Though that Ivy sure is a looker and is sneaky. And Timmy sure is a cute little bugger, loving his enemy, the sweet and innocent Charity. And that evil Kay! Trying to break Miguel and Charity up. I like her…" Buffy snapped out of her shocked mood to yell at Spike.

"What's you're problem? We're being held hostage by Urkel-wannabe's and you're telling me the whole plot to a stupid soap?!"

"MY problem?! You should talk. What was the scared bunny look for?"

Buffy looked really sad and started whimpering.

"Childhood trauma. I went to my aunt's house for the weekend and Family Matters was their family's favorite show." Buffy grabbed Spike's shirt and it was almost like she was reliving it and was pleading him to stop it.

"They had tapes Spike! They had all the episodes and played them over and over!" At this point she was sobbing uncontrollably.

"There, there, luv. Shh…it's over now." Spike held her close and hugged her sympathetically.

"Hey! Be quiet! We are the evil children spawn of one Maggie Walsh and Adam for their own world domination purposes but something backfired. We will not tell you what because…we don't want to. Just know this—woah!" The leader Urkel-wannabe tripped on his shoelace and crashed into the table below.

"Oops. Did I do that?"

Spike too this time to think of a plan.

"Did they say they were the sons of Walsh and Adam? I've got it!" He whispered his plan to Willow and Buffy.

"That's brilliant, Spike!" Willow was impressed.

"I don't know if I want to…" Buffy was unsure if she was strong enough to face the Urkel-wannabe's yet. Spike lifted her chin so she looked directly into his eyes.

"Buffy, please. I need your help with this. It's the only way." Buffy knew he was right and knew he would be right there beside her.

"Alright." She gave a tiny nod and a smile.

"Great! Red, help me set everything up."

"Everything's go."

Spike and Buffy both stood on the tables with microphones.

Buffy took a big breath and sang with the music:

They say we're young and we don't know
Won't find out till we grow
Well I don't know why that's true
Cause you got me baby, I got you

Spike was really proud of her and joined in:

Babe, I got you babe, I got you, Babe.

"NO!!!!" The Urkels started shrieking and jumping around. They started sizzling and melting.

"I'm melting! Melting!"

"Oh my gawd! You killed Urkel number 678! You cheese-butt!" Soon, they were all just a blob of gum, stuck on the floor.

"We did it Buffy!" Spike and Buffy jumped and hugged in excitement. And didn't let go for some time.

"Umm…let's get out of here now." Willow tried to separate those two. Failing, she went over to Xander and Anya.

"Come ON! Ugh!" She fell backwards trying to get Anya off Xander.

"Fine. I'll just leave then."

So that, my friends, was a normal nightmare-free night in Sunnydale but of course in Sunnydale, no night is nightmare free. So what was the point of this story? I totally forgot. Hope you had fun and drive safely.^_^

THE EN--

"Wait a minute! You never told us how Spike knew how to kill the Urkel-wannabes!" Buffy, still enbraced with Spike, asked.

"Hey! It's MY story! You are THIS close missy! You're lucky I like Spike/Buffy stories, or I'll make him leave you and go home with Willow!"

"No! I'll be good now. Hehe. You carry on." She tightened her grip on Spike.

As I WAS saying, The End. (yeah!)