This is an updated version of this story. I'm not really satisfied with how my stories turned out a year or two ago, so I'm changing things up a bit. I hope you like it, reviews always make me smile! ;)

I wondered the halls in annoyance, not caring what my people may think. This routine is getting old, very fast. Merlin has always been late in, well, everything. But, this is just rediculous. How many times do I have to go off and find my servant to force him to do his job? how long should a king wait for his meals to arrive? for his clothes to be cleaned? for his dinner to be on time? Wait. I already said that, but I can't help it. I'm starving. I'm annoyed, severely so. Actually, that doesn't seem to be the right word at all. I'm mad, I'm furious at him. Yes, I have noticed that he has been slacking off more than usual lately. In fact, it's been slowly getting worse ever sense my father died. Not that I've been watching him very closely, its quite obvious to tell. Especially sense I experience it first hand in times like these.

Making my way into the court physician's chambers, I didn't even bother to knock. At least, not right away. I did regret it, though, when I noticed that Guias nearly jumped out of his skin the moment I entered. I quickly apologized, not wanting a berating from the man at the time. When I found out that Merlin wasn't here, hadn't been in hours. My anger found its way through me again and I left, much like in the way I barged in. Momentarily forgetting about Guias and my manners. I turned in the direction I was told to go, and spoke to a pair of guards at the castle entrance, hoping that they could assist me in finding him. Luck was on my side, I suppose. I was pointed in the direction of the Great Wall of Kamilah, just outside Camelot's gates. Confusion swept over me. Why would he want to go there? No one goes there, at least, not any more.

Kamilah, meaning perfect, or wild, is a quiet, well-known area just west of Camelot. People from my kingdom and other towns travel there to enjoy the view, clear their thoughts, or sometimes men just go there to have a picnic with their wives on some magnificent day. It really is a beautiful place to spend the day at, It's surrounded by trees, bushes, and wild flowers growing all around. If you look down from over the giant cliff there's even a lake that shines as bright as the moon on nights, and glows as bright as the sun, in the day. Many people stopped visiting the place when, time by time, people would just.. jump off. Daughters, sons, husbands, wives.. Soon it became too hard to bare to go there anymore, so, people stopped going.
So why would his idiot of a manservant be there now?

''Kamilah?" I said, my anger died down a little as I heard this. ''Did he say what for?" I never go up there myself. I have a few times, though, just riding past it every once in a while. Sometimes, which is very rare, I would run into a hysterical mother, or father, and be handed a piece of parchment that had been left on their kitchen table. They would get down on their knees, plead to me, telling me that a loved one of theirs is going to jump. How could I refuse? I couldn't. So I accepted, every single time. I hated those occassions. I hated having to tell the worried families that I had failed to save someone that they had entrusted me to save. I hated watching the children's' faces as they were told that their mother or father was not coming home. I absolutely despised telling them that I had been too late.

The guards shook their head and I let out an agitated sigh.''Well, Then.'' I said, as I turned away.'' Maybe I can push him off he cliff to teach him to stop slacking off.'' Pushing away the concern I felt, I walked away. I heard the men behind me chuckle at my joke. Because, there's really nothing to be worried about, right? He probably just decided to take a long walk in order to escape his chores. I sighed once more. I'm going to kill him.

3

I dismounted my horse swiftly, making my way into the moon-lit clearing. It wasn't exactly a long ride, in fact, I may have even enjoyed it if I were here for any other reason. My worry completely vanished on the way here, well, almost completely. I decided that I was being foolish. There was nothing to concern myself over. The only danger Merlin may be in is falling off, and, with his consistent clumsiness, it wouldn't be surprising. I yelled his name several times before I reached the center. I looked around the edge. It was very wide, actually. It must stretch for a good walking distance. I silently cursed, not only did I have to bother myself with dragging him back here, but I have to hunt for the man as well. I continued to yell his name, along with other very colorful insults and threats. I would definitely not follow through with most of the things I said, but he didn't have to know that.

With each passing minute, my voice grew louder. How far could he have possibly gone? was he even here? rage overcame me at the thought that I had wasted my time wandering this place. With each step I took, the more certain I became that this was the case. I looked around wildly, outraged. Now I have to walk all the way back to where my horse is, and ride back to Camelot. There is absolutely no sign that he had ever been here at all! I stopped walking and decided, that, even if he was out here somewhere, I'll just have to get him tomorrow for it. Kicking a nearby rock, I began to turn my back. That is when I saw him. His rediculous red neckerhief was billowing in the wind and he was looking downwards at the river. It was still quite a ways away and I inwardly groaned. ''Merlin!'' I yelled. Hoping that he would hear me and turn around. But, I suppose, nothing ever goes my way when it comes to Merlin. I groaned out loud, this was absolutely not the time for him to be ignorant. I started making my way towards him in a swift pace, all while wondering what kind of chores to give him to make up for this.. incident.

I was most certainly not out of breath, when I finally arrived. I just needed a minute to calm myself down, before I really did push Merlin off the ledge. He was standing so close already, though. He could fall. Worry overtook me and I took a few steps forward as to not startle him. After all, Merlin was very clumsy. I'm surprised he hasn't already fallen over the cliff. How long had he been standing here like this? I looked him over, his back was tense, his arms limp at his sides. Actually, now that I think about it, I don't think he has moved a single muscle sense I saw him a while back. If that wasn't like Merlin, I didn't know what was. Calling his name softly, I stood still. He didn't answer. Was he really that deaf? or just extremely lost in thought? I called his name again, louder. And his head snapped up from where he had been gazing down at the raging currents below.

''Merlin? I asked. ''What are you doing?" He didn't get an answer. Actually, this wasn't just odd of Merlin, this was the complete opposite of how he usually acts. I saw that he, once again, returned his unwavering gaze to the vast waters below. Realization suddenly came over me. I stopped in my tracks. Merlin could never do something like this. I thought. No, I was wrong. I didn't even want to think about that. It was just impossible. Merlin was always happy and smiling, without a care in the world. Yes, of course, he had his moments. He had times, just as everyone else, where the world catches up with him. But, he would never even consider doing something like this.

''Thinking.'' Merlin finally said. I was shocked into silence. His voice, in which was normally filled with joy and mirth, was defeated. detached. I suddenly realized that this was really happening. This was real. I had no idea what to do.

Normally, With the other victims, I would try to coax them out of the jump, Tell them to think things through. And for the people who did jump, I wouldn't feel any different. Well,At least, not much. I would feel angry at myself for failing. Angry for letting those people down. People that had counted on me. They don't all jump, of course. I should feel overjoyed by that, but it only makes me remember how I could have saved the others. I didn't feel sad though. Because Normally, people just didn't have that effect on him. But now, He couldn't even think straight through his thoughts of confusion and fear.
Sure, there have been times when he asked himself, ''What if that was me? What if someone close to me had died?"
Yes, he had imagined it, but he never thought it would be like this. This was Merlin we're talking about. This is the Merlin I had always known. Who had always stood up for me; believed in me. This is my friend I'm seeing right now. The friend, the brother, that I have known for years. Now, it seems like I don't know him at all. Now, I have no idea what to do.

So, I did the only thing that I could do.

I took a few, cautious steps forward with my hands raised, not caring if he could see me or not. ''What are you thinking about?" I asked slowly. Maybe I can distract him, get close enough.. I could grab his arm and drag him as far away from here as possible. Everything inside me was screaming at me, telling me that this is all wrong. That, this couldn't be happening. I closed my eyes and willed myself to focus. Panicking will not help in this situation.

''Everything.'' the younger man said. Merlin leaned forward a bit, But otherwise, stayed completely still. Completely and utterly still.

''Alright. well, Why don't you step back over here and we can talk about it, together. Alright?" I took a couple more steps forward so we were just a few feet away.
There was no response. I took a few more steps, Making sure to be loud enough so not to startle him, and gently laid a hand on his shoulder.

''Merlin.'' The Prince calmly stated. ''Please.''
There was more silence before slowly, and finally, Merlin nodded his head.
Arthur took that as his que, and took his friend,- No, Scratch that.- His brother by his wrist and slowly began leading him as far away from the cliff as possible as he released the breath he didn't know he had held.

Coming to a stop by the more forested area, I sat Merlin down by a nearby tree and started to pace restlessly. I searched my mind frantically, trying to find a hint, a single clue as to why he would even consider doing something so horrible. Yes, he had been slacking off more recently, but I didn't think it was that big of a deal. At least, not until now. I completely forgot that I was hungry, or mad. All of my attention was focused on why. I just needed one thing to make sense, one piece of the puzzle to fit in.
I don't know how long I was pacing, but all I knew is that I was done with it. I feel completely and utterly helpless and confused. My anger came back like a punch to the gut. It was a different kind, though. I am angry of what he tried to do, and sad that he tried to do It in the first place. I'm more angry at myself, though. I should have noticed something like this. I should have seen the signs. And God, where were the signs?

I ran my fingers through my hair dejectedly and crouched down in front of his sullen figure. ''Merlin.'' I said softly. I meant to be more stern, more commanding. Seeing him like this, though. Seeing my friend like this; small and vunerable.. Not at all like he's supposed to look like.. I feel like I had lost a battle inside my head. Again, I was met with silence. Merlin didn't look up, didn't speak, didn't joke. I half expected him to jump up and smile that ridiculous smile of his and say 'Got ya!'' But, it never happened. This wasn't the Merlin I once knew. This side of him, is nothing more than a shadow of the man I've grown to know.

''If you even knew him to start with.'' A voice in his head rang, but I chose to push it by. For now.

I called his name again, and this time, he looked up. The words died in my throat as I looked into those pain-filled eyes. Those eyes that usually were so... light. So young, so innocent. Now I'm looking into eyes of those of an old man's. Eyes that had seen too much, in so little time. Bitterness. Sorrow. Utter defeat. And was that... Guilt?
It made me want to kick myself for not realizing this sooner. What if I had gotten here too late? Or, Worse, not at all? what if I had sent a servant to get my dinner instead of going after Merlin myself? No. Now is not the time to be thinking of that. You made it. I told myself. You saved him. You were there.

''Why?" I asked again. I couldn't help the tears that prickled in in my eyes at the sound of my own broken voice.
Why would he do this? ''Why Merlin?'' tears now made its way freely down my cheeks, and, for the first time in a while, The younger man spoke.
Two words. Two words that made his dam break. Just screw this. he thought to himself.

Those words were. ''I'm sorry.'' And at the sound of how broken that voice was, I fell apart even more. I watched as my friend broke down and I silently slid down next to him, pulling him into a gentle embrace.
They stayed like that for a while and he kept repeating the words ''I'm sorry.'' and 'I'm so sorry.'' And that made me wrap my arms around him even tighter. As if protecting him from the dangers of the world.

But the truth is, What would he have done if he had never came? What would he really do without Merlin? His first and only friend- brother.
He doesn't know, and hopefully will never find out.

The only thing he does know, Is that their going to get through this.

Together.

Like they always have, And always will.

Fin.