Kryptonite

by: LizTheBookNerd

I walked into the living room feeling exhausted. It was around three in the morning, and I should have been asleep in bed trying to get through my own nightmares. However, Peeta, for the first time in months, had a little attack. The shiny memories had come back to him, even though he has been doing so much better as of late. He seemed to be getting his life back, the life that he deserved. Things between us seemed to be better as well. Not perfect, but better. We decided to both live in the same house because it was easier that way. So this had to only be a minor setback from the progress he was making. I knew he couldn't get worse, or at least I hoped he couldn't.

I wanted to stay upstairs with him. I wanted to hold him like he did for me after I have nightmares. I wanted to remind him of everything, and let him know it was all going to be okay. I hated seeing him in pain, especially this kind of pain. But he said he needed to be alone. He said he needed time to cool down and try to sort out what is real and not real in his head. Against my better judgment, I ended up giving in to his wishes. I left him alone upstairs in the bedroom we shared.

Now I'm just sitting downstairs, waiting for him to come back to me.

I started up the fireplace, getting chilly in just a tank top and shorts. It's been about five years since the end of the war, and in those five years, Peeta and I have grown close, maybe even closer than we were before he was taken away from me by the Capitol. Peeta keeps me strong. With him by my side, I'm willing to try to get over the death of my loved ones. He makes me happy. He has become my best friend. He helps comforts me, and makes most of the nightmares go away. I just wish I could do the same for him.

Once I get the fire going, I start to hear movement upstairs. The shuffling of feet on the floor that lies above me, and then the creaks from the wooden staircase make me aware of his arrival. Peeta peaks his head around the corner, looking to see if I was there. Or, maybe, he wanted to see if I was sleeping on the couch.

Our eyes meet, and then his back-to-normal baby blue eyes stare at the ground. His blonde hair is still a mess on the top of his head. I study him, looking for any signs that he could lose it on me again, but all traces of mutt-Peeta seem to have disappeared for now.

"Hey," I whisper to him.

"Hi," I can barely hear the word even leave his mouth.

A part of me wants to run up to Peeta and let him know everything is okay now, but I don't. I know it is best for him to come to me after one of his attacks. If he is still confused, I don't want to make things any worse than they already are.

Peeta sighs and then looks me straight in the eyes, wanting to get to, what is probably, his main concern. "I didn't hurt you up there, did I? I didn't cause you any bruises and scars?"

You can see the look of worry plastered on his face; how concerned he is. It breaks my heart.

"No, none at all," I tell him. "The only pain I felt was having to watch you get so confused and scared, and not being able to do anything to help you get better."

Peeta sighs with relief before sitting down next to me on the couch, but still keeping his distance from me. He doesn't want to take any chances.

I don't deserve Peeta, I know I don't. Haymitch was right when he told me that years ago. But of course, he won't accept that. In his mind, he doesn't deserve me, and I have no idea how he came up with that idea. From the moment we met, I've never deserved my boy with the bread.

I could tell there was something on his mind still. His eyes had that curious look about them, full of question and wonder. He wanted to ask something, but couldn't find the words to do it. We sat there for another 5 minutes, not exchanging a single word, before he finally offered what thoughts were bouncing around his head.

"Katniss, I know things are getting better in my mind, but sometimes I feel like I'm making your life harder. I'm never going to be one hundred percent me again. The real Peeta was left in the arena at the last Quarter Quell. I just feel so worthless and crazy sometimes, and it's like I can't do anything to make things better. Do you ever wish that I decided not to come back to District Twelve? That I went to one of the other Districts, so we could completely start over with our lives to help you forget all the bad things?"

"Peeta, what happened to you isn't your fault. It wasn't your choice, and while you may never be fully you again, I'm a different person to. After everything that happened to the both of us, living through two Hunger Games and fighting in a war, even if you weren't hijacked you still wouldn't be the exact replica of post-Hunger Games Peeta. I don't care how crazy you get; you're still Peeta to me. It doesn't matter if you're crazy or perfectly fine, I'm going to stay by your side no matter what. You help me get through my nightmares, Peeta. You and only you. Now I want to help you get through yours." My cheeks started burning. I had no clue where that little speech came from.

Peeta smiled at me and I could see relief fill in his eyes. "I don't know how you put up with me, but I guess I won't complain."

"Well, I could say the same to you. Peeta, even in my weakest moments, you stayed by my side and listened to what I had to say. I took advantage of you, and never really appreciated how wonderful you had always been until you were taken away from me. I don't know how you put up with me."

"Well," Peeta started, "I guess you're kinda like my Kryptonite then. You're one of my weaknesses."

That statement made my cheeks burn again, and when Peeta saw, it made him laugh. I smiled, never really noticing how much I liked hearing the sound of his laugh.

Peeta offered me his hand, helping me off of the couch we'd been sitting on. "Katniss, how about we try to go back to sleep?" Peeta suggested.

"Sure," I smiled, as he lead me up the stairs.

It's the things like this that keep bringing Peeta and myself closer together. He's truly my best friend. Maybe he's more. But that will have to be a conversation for another night.

A/N: Hi guys, I hope you enjoyed the one-shot! You know, reviews and favorites are always appreciated. Thanks for reading!

A/N2: Updated slightly 1/26/14