A/N: here's another joint effort by me and my partner in crime, J. In other words, the girl who wrote 'Underwater Kisses' with me. And boy, do we have a beauty for you! Based off a true story…well partially. Again. The true part in this story is the spoon. I'm serious. I don't like spoons. J just said her brother collects spoons. I shudder. That rhyms…kind of. Okay, enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: We do not own Mrs. Butterworth's syrup or Gundam Wing. Heehee, if we did, it would be marvelous. (and if I had my way, a yaoi.)
Spoons
Spoons. Duo has officially ruined spoons for me. In other words, no more ice cream, cereal, occasional hot chocolate with whipped cream and a cherry on top (A/N: see, Underwater kisses), and most importantly, no more of my daily dose of herbal tea! How did he do this to me, you might ask? Well, it all started this morning at the kitchen table. I was sitting there innocently, ignoring the lewd looks Heero and Duo passed each other from across the table, and gently stirred my delectable herbal tea, thinking about the lack of sleep I had due to the rhythmic thumps against the wall by my head from the other room last night. Damn them and their insatiable sex drive!
...Anyway, I was sitting there just minding my own business and daintily sipping my warm tea from my favorite, exquisite silver spoon. My mind started wandering to the shmexy uni-banged teen across from me. I thought, how wonderful it would be, if Trowa's lips were not enveloping the spoon from his bland oatmeal…for that is Trowa, bland. Though in my mind, very exotic…but instead around my- and then it happened. Duo, taking a break from trying get Heero turned on by eating waffles all sexy like, opened his wide, loud, and oftentimes annoying mouth. And what came out…was not pleasant.
"Hey guys, you'll never guess what Kimmy told me the other day. You know her don't you, Kimmy from our class? She is so cool I mean sometimes she lets me copy her homewoooork…" That's when Duo trailed off at the look on Heero's face. I don't need to describe it to you. You know. That one. I was starting to regret listening to Duo when he opened his mouth again. "Anyways, she was telling me about this one time," he said, flinging his fork around excitedly, showering us all with waffle flakes and flecks of Mrs. Butterworth's pure maple syrup. "Oh, and this why I'm not into girls, by the way. Not that I would be anyways, I have my Hee-chan." Duo broke off while making purring sounds at Heero. Wufei scowled and yelled over his evenly sliced fresh fruit salad,
"Duo, GET ON WITH IT! Aaagh, the injustice of it all!" I couldn't decide if I was supporting Wufei in this move, or wishing that Duo would never talk again. Actually, I'm surprised that he can now judging by the sounds that he and Heero make at night…but I digress.
"Woah, calm down Wu-man, I was just getting to the good part!" Duo said, admonishing the indignant Chinese. "So, she…well, first you have to know that she's very…well, you know…I mean to say she's sexually active, no that's not it…frustrated? No, well, you know what I mean." By now we were all regretting the decision to listen to him at all. "Anyway, Kimmy and I were comparing our many kinky sexual escapades." If Duo was paying any attention to the look that now resided on Heero's face at the thought of his Duo conversing with a girl about his 'sexual escapades', he would realize that if he didn't shut up he was going to die. But unfortunately for Duo, he didn't see. Wufei, who was very irritated by now, not that I don't blame him, and tiring of Duo's droning on without making his point, finally snapped.
"GET ON WITH IT MAXWELL, JUST GET TO THE POINT!"
"Anyway, she told me that she ate herself out with a spoon," he said cheerfully and went back to eating his waffles. With his fork, I might add.
It was at that moment when we all froze for a second, our spoons mere inches away from our mouths. That was when all hell broke loose. Heero, looking thoughtfully at the spoon proceed to throw it behind his shoulder, get up from the table, grab Duo, and drag him by his collar up the stairs. Wufei, now entirely regretting his decision to tell Maxwell to get to the point, clenched the spoon in his hand while his face turned white. He then leapt up from his seat, and let out a rather loud, "INJUSTICE!" and followed Heero up the stairs, brandishing the now soiled spoon like a weapon of mass destruction, also known as a WMD. Trowa gently placed his spoon back down on the table, picked up his bowl of cereal, and downed it. I, mouth gaping and face bright red promptly dropped my favorite, exquisite silver spoon on the floor. Never again will it's shiny silver be appreciated.
After getting over the shock of Duo's statement, I noticed that Trowa and I were all alone. Together. At the kitchen table. I need not mention that the kitchen table is the setting of many of my kinky thoughts. Why, one might ask? Because. The kitchen is my home. Plus, it has the refrigerator. Which has many dessert items, such as chocolate syrup and whipped cream. The kitchen comes in only second to the bathroom. We won't go there. So I found myself staring into his eye. Yes, eye. His hair covers up the other one. He looked back at me, and I found myself entranced by his manliness…or something like that. I thought about making conversation but all that came to mind was, so Trowa, what are your thoughts on kinky sex on the kitchen table? And that just wouldn't work. There was a long pause until Trowa finally started the conversation.
"…", he said. I tried, honestly I did. But I was baffled.
"Trowa," I stated, "I am not Heero. As much as I try, I can't understand the '…'s." This seemed to take Trowa completely by surprise.
"…?"
"No, I can't." I replied, not realizing that I just understood. Suddenly, a thought hit me. What if all of those times that Trowa said '…' were actually him confessing his passionate love for me? Then, I remembered my overactive imagination. He was probably really saying, '…'.
Trowa smiled at me and said, "See, you just understood that." I flushed slightly before stammering back,
"Yes, well…the question mark at the end kind of gave it away."
"Hn…". Damn them. Damn the 'Hn's to Hades. A nervous giggle escaped from my lips. I felt really stupid, so I tried to start a new line of conversation.
"So, do you think Duo's getting the silent treatment or the loud one…if you know what I mean?" I smiled. Trowa stared at me. His mouth hung slightly open. And he continued to stare at me. It was only then that I realized that what I just said was completely out of character, and unlike anything that Quatre Raberba Winner would ever say. In fact, I almost sounded like our dear braided idiot. Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll get the same treatment. No, my mind thought. Bad Quatre! Actually…it didn't say that. But you really don't want to know what it did say.
I hastily covered my mouth in shock, but it was too late. I slipped my cover. Oh great, now I sound like some spy from an old black and white TV show. Trowa smiled slightly, pushed his chair back, and walked over to me. Now it was my turn to gape. He stood mere inches from my chair and leaned on the table so we were eye to eye.
"Hey Quatre," he asked. "What are your views on kinky sex on the kitchen table?" Needless to say, I was flabbergasted. WHAT?!?! I stared as he slowly and seductively licked his plump, perfect lips. My mind ran though many things, but my mouth said one. "…?" Which was code for 'what the hell are you waiting for? Hurry up and kiss me dammit!' Yes, I know; all that in three dots. You'd be surprised by the lengthy conversations Heero and Trowa have without speaking a word. It's amazing. Apparently, my pronunciation was correct, because without further ado Trowa leaned down and kissed me. It was bliss. I kid you not. It started out as a simple peck, but I could wait no longer, and pulled him against me, causing my back to end up against the table with Trowa practically on top of me. Not that I was complaining. Have you ever seen those movies where with just a swish of the hand everything is sent flying off the table? Ya, that's what happened, and Trowa and I proceeded to make out on the kitchen table. After a few minutes of heaven, Trowa pulled back slightly. His breath came out in soft puffs against my face and I smiled softly. He smirked at me and said huskily, "You never answered my question." I grinned and pulled him in for another heavy kiss after saying,
"I'm all for it." It wasn't long before all our clothes were off and we were going at it on the table. I didn't even notice when Wufei walked back into the kitchen, bragging about how 'justice had finally been served.' What I barely registered was the sound of a shrill scream and a thump as he passed out on the floor with a nosebleed. But did that stop Trowa and me? Hell no.
An hour later, Heero and Duo walked downstairs. Actually, Heero walked, Duo limped. The scene that they came upon was Wufei passed out on the floor with blood spread across his face, and Trowa and I asleep on the table, chocolate sauce smeared all over our bodies. Needless to say, our first time wasn't left to whispered words in the dark between the sheets, but out there for everyone to enjoy. Yes, we never heard the end of it. Wufei threatened to have us pay for counseling.
This all started with Duo ruining spoons for us. It ended with Trowa and me ruining the kitchen table for everyone. But now we have a new table downstairs and the old in our room, just for sentimental value. Of course, we use it every now and again. Wufei has endless threats for us if we ever sully another kitchen table. Many of them involve immediate castration, but I don't think he would ever want to get that close. Heh heh, poor Wuffles. Damn, I really am turning into Duo.
C'est fini. Owari. The end. No more, you hear?!
A/N: So, there's another story from our fantastic duo! Heehee, duo. Muahaha. Anyway, it is us! The ones who brought you 'Underwater kisses'. Notice the trend? If not, read the other one. Do it! Tell us what you think! I for one, want to watch Gundam wing. Muahahaha and eat ice cream. I don't know why. My partner wants ice cream with chocolate. Heehee. Oh the wonders of chocolate sauce. Will they never cease?
