Disclaimer: I own absolutely NOTHING… makes me wanna cry… :D

Written for/Submitted to The Ultimate FanFic challenge: community(dot)livejournal(dot)com/fanfic100/
My LDT Link: krysnel-nicavis(dot)livejournal(dot)com/875(dot)html


Title:
Moral Philosophy
Fandom: CSI
Characters: Nightshift CSI's
Prompt: #88 – School
Word Count: 1,750
Rating: K (May contain minor action violence without serious injury, mild coarse language; should not contain any adult themes.)
Summary: The gang has a deeply philosophical discussion about chocolate… and a few minor problems.
Author's Notes: Based on events that happened in one of my actual Philosophy classes. After that class, I just had to write this.
It was 6:30 p.m. in a little community college located in a small town somewhere north of Las Vegas and the 6 p.m. three hour Moral Philosophy class was bored out of their minds. It could have been interesting, discussing the UN Declaration of Human Rights, Richard Rorty, and Plato, but the eight students sitting in the class had the misfortune of being stuck in one of the least liked teleconference classes – the instructor for this particular class, Professor Jim Brass, was located in one of the universities in Las Vegas itself. So as it stood, these unfortunate eight individuals were stuck sitting around an ancient triangular teleconference speaker phone which, quite frankly, had obviously seen better days and was clearly on its last legs. As if things couldn't get any worse, they were experiencing technical difficulties.

"C'mon you piece of crap, work dammit!" twenty-one year old Nick Stokes – a transfer from Belton, Texas – shouted in a thick Texan accent at the offending equipment.

"Okay, I can barely hear you making a sound," the clear voice of Jim Brass filtered through the speaker. The eight unfortunate students groaned. "Look, I've got an idea. You hang up and call me back and we'll see if that solves the problem." Brass gave them the number to dial and Gil Grissom, a twenty-nine year old return student, hung up and dialled the number. The room was filled with a busy signal.

"Are you sure you're dialling the right number?" Twenty-three year old David Hodges asked from his seat beside his girlfriend – Twenty year old Wendy Simms. He was lazily flipping through their textbook while Wendy doodled in her notebook.

"Yes I'm sure," Gil snapped. Hodges had been offering useless advice since class started. Gil tried the number again, getting another busy signal. Twenty-four year old Catherine Willows shoved him aside and dialled the number achieving the same result. She hung up and sat down frustrated next to her boyfriend, twenty-three year old Warrick Brown. After a few moments the phone rang. Nineteen year old Greg Sanders hit the 'On' button.

"Thank you for calling Pizza Hut, Traci speaking, how can I help you?"

"Very funny," Brass' voice said. "Well, I can hear you fine now. Let's hope we don't encounter any more problems." Brass continued the lecture about the UN Declaration that had been interrupted when he'd asked the eight students on the other end of the phone a question. Sara hit the 'Mute' button, making the lights on the phone glow red instead of green.

"This is so boring," she said and sat back.

"What did you just do?" Wendy asked as she stared at the phone, Brass' voice was still coming through clearly.

"When you hit the 'mute' button it stops our microphone from picking up the sounds we make so he can't hear us."

"Why do you need to do that?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Greg asked, practically bouncing in his seat to Nick's left. "If the mute is on we don't have to try so painstakingly to stay quiet!"

"That doesn't mean we can be as loud as we want," Hodges pointed out. Greg just stuck out his tongue and pulled out a Nintendo DS. Wendy reached forward and hit the 'mute' button, making the lights glow green again. Sara reached forward and hit the 'mute' button on the little microphone/speaker that was attached to the main unit before opening her book and flipping through it

"This is so boring," Catherine said and rested her chin on her palm. Wendy turned the 'mute' off again. Warrick reached over and picked up Nick's pen – Nick was busy looking over Greg's shoulder at the little screen, his arm resting on the chair behind Greg. He looked around the room, no one noticing what he was doing he took aim and tossed the pen, hitting Hodges squarely between the eyes.

"Hey!" Hodges shouted. His voice was amplified three times as loud as it was by the speaker phone and they all jumped.

"Guys, cut it out," Grissom said, his voice also amplified.

"What's going on?" Sara looked at the phone as she jumped away from it – her voice also amplified.

"Don't speak so loud," Catherine whispered but her voice, too, sounded unbearably loud through the speaker.

"What's going on over there?" Brass' voice came through once more. "I'm hearing some sound from over there."

"Uh, nothing sir," Warrick said, the eight them wincing at the loud feedback. Nick then noticed his pen was missing.

"Hey, where's my pen?" he asked loudly. They all clamped their hands over their ears as the Texan's words were loudly thrown back at them, verbally protesting, creating even more noise.

"What's going on over there?" Brass asked again. "I can't make out what you're saying again." Suddenly the phone emitted a loud mechanical screeching sound. They all cried out in protest and jumped far away from the phone.

"What is that?" Nick asked and the phone made the sound again.

"It sounds like a Transformer," Warrick shouted as the phone continued to make the strange noise.

"Oh my God, Decepticon invasion!" Greg called out with a wide grin, his eyes dancing with laughter.

"Funny Sanders," Hodges barked over the sound. They were all looking at the phone confused and covering their ears. Looking around Sara caught sight of the mini microphone/speaker sitting four feet away from her. She dove forward and hit the 'mute' on again. The noise immediately stopped.

"Okay, I heard some sort of small squeak that time," Brass' voice said. The students let out exasperated sighs and dropped into their seats.

"I think the mini microphone is too close to the main speaker," Wendy suggested. Sara moved it farther from the large speaker and turned the mute off. Nothing happened. They let out the breaths they'd been holding and smiled contently.

"You still with me over there?"

"Yes, sir," Hodges answered.

"What was that?"

"Yes," Hodges, Catherine, Sara, and Nick shouted at the same time.

"Okay, I think I heard a yes. It's coming out of my speaker at about the sound of a whisper, but you seem to be shouting." Greg banged his head lightly on his notebook and Sara put the mute on again. The lecture continued with Wendy doodling in her notebook again, Catherine filing her nails, Sara staring at her book but not really reading it, Gil paying half attention to the teacher in case they had to BS an answer to a question, Hodges actually reading the textbook, Greg playing his Nintendo again and Nick and Warrick throwing each other's things across the room. After a while Greg pulled out and opened a bag of Mini Rolos, popping three in his mouth.

"Mmm, I love chocolate," he grinned happily.

"Me too," Nick said taking a few for himself, his arm resting on the back of Greg's chair again.

"I don't like dark chocolate," Wendy declared.

"Me neither," Sara made a face. "It's so bitter."

"It has less sugar added," Gil commented.

"You know, pure chocolate is an aphrodisiac?" Greg said and ate the Mini Rolo Nick held out in front of him.

"I hate white chocolate," Catherine said, resting her head on Warrick's shoulder. "It tastes too much like milk."

"White chocolate isn't milk," Nick stated.

"Yes it is," Catherine argued.

"No it isn't," Wendy countered.

"White chocolate tastes like vanilla," Greg mused.

"Yeah, vanilla," Sara agreed.

"Vanilla is brown, not white," Catherine remarked. Warrick grinned at his girlfriend.

"I'm allergic to chocolate," he said with a smile.

"No you're not, you were eating a chocolate bar earlier," Hodges pointed out.

"That was a peanut butter cup."

"Dude, that is chocolate," Nick stated.

"I'm chocolate deprived," Sara sighed.

"Why, are you allergic too?" Greg teased.

"Nope," Sara grinned. "I just haven't had any in a while."

"I can fix that," Greg smirked.

"Greg," Gil said in a low warning tone glaring at Greg.

"What?" Greg asked innocently. "I have Mini Rolos." He held up the bag he and Nick were sharing and leaned into the older man.

"What do you think Warrick?" Brass's voice suddenly broke through the discussion. They stared at the phone.

"He asked if you knew what Natural Law was," Gil supplied and Sara turned the mute off.

"Uh, could you repeat the question?" Warrick asked.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Repeat! Question!" Warrick shouted and hit the mute button as Brass repeated the question and turned to rest of the group. "What do I say?"

Greg reached forward and turned the mute off, shouting as he did so. "Uh, does it have anything to do with religion?"

"Religion? No. It is as its name implies…" The mute was turned on once more. The group continued to amuse themselves, Greg's bag of Mini Rolos made its way around the room. The discussion had moved from the UN Declaration to the article "Human Rights, rationality, and Sentimentality" by Richard Rorty and Brass was now outlining the notation written on it, explaining what the messy scrawl that was actually the citation from the book the article was taken from said.

"Uh, sir?" Gil said, turning the mute back off. "Sir?" he called louder. "Brass!"

"Yes, I heard something from there."

"You said there were twenty pages," Gil shouted. "We only have eleven!"

"Eleven? I faxed over everything," Brass sounded dismayed.

"Well we only have eleven!"

"Oh, well I'm not sure why that is, but we'll discuss up to page eleven and I'll re-fax the remaining pages…" The mute went back on.

"Great, now we have even more reading," Catherine lamented.

"There's two pages per sheet," Gil pointed out. "So we only really have another four and a half pages more."

"That's beside the point." They half listened to Brass prattle on about the article and the readings from Plato's works they'd been assigned the week before. They only focused on what Brass was saying when he was explaining their reading for next week. The small group practically cheered when they were able to hang up the phone and leave for the night.

Nick and Greg walked over to where Nick's truck was parked after saying goodbye to their classmates. "So," Nick grinned as he turned to face the younger man. "What would you say if I said I haven't had anything sweet for a while?"

Greg grinned as well and shrugged. "I'd probably say that I could definitely fix that." He leaned into Nick, pressing their lips softly together.

- 30 -


chapter updated:
January 18, 2008