SILK STALKINGS - REVIEWS
by Sammy
You ain't the most important in the world, but most people are believing in this. They are selfish, vain and greedy. Most of these people are living their life not thinking about tomorrow. I also used to live my life not thinking about tomorrow when I was younger. Soon I will be a mother. I have to think about the future. And I realized life is a lot easier when you think about what might happen tomorrow...
Chris and Rita had been married for 4 months. Rita quit working at the force some weeks ago, but nevertheless she spent most of the day at the police headquarters. She didn't know what to do all day long alone at home. Cap. Lipshitz wasn't really glad to see his pregnant Lt. sneaking around at the headquarters. She was off-duty and he told her that more than one time.
"Lt. Lorenzo, Sgt. Lorenzo, into my office. NOW!"
Chris gave Rita that look "it certainly won't be nice what he has to tell us". Rita sighed as they both walked over to Cap's office.
"Please sit down you two."
Chris and Rita sat down on the couch.
"Rita, I told you more than one time you should spend your days at home. This place here is nothing for a pregnant woman."
"I know, Cap, but I don't know what to do at home. I've never been a good housewife, you know."
"Yeah, I know. Therefore I am going to suspend your husband."
"What? Why? You can't do that, Cap! She's the one having the baby, not me."
"I know, Lorenzo, but this is the only way to keep your wife where she belongs to. Out of this office."
Rita smiled at Chris and patted his chest.
"Don't worry, Christopher. Some time off work can't harm you."
Not a long time and I will be a mother. Everything did go so fast. Yeah, really fast. I can clearly remember a time I was sure I wouldn't live long enough to have children, but I also remember a time I was longing for a child. Now I am married and I soon will have my beautiful baby...
When you love somebody everything should be perfect. Or parfait as Chris uses to say. It's not only a matter of perfect understanding, it's also a matter of perfect timing. When I told Chris I was pregnant it was not a perfect timing. We just were courting for some months. My pregnancy kind of took us by surprise. I was 4 months pregnant when we got married. Even if someone told me he would give me a million dollars for turning back time I would say no. Chris is my life. Our baby is my life.
Today was their first day off work. As the weather was really warm, Chris and Rita decided to go to the beach. They were sitting in the sand, watching the waves.
"Sam, I can't tell you how lucky I am. I have you, and a baby is on its way. Life is parfait."
"So? Parfait?" Rita replied.
"I think our baby will be a huge bundle of joy."
"Yeah, it certainly will."
"I can't remember I've ever been so lucky in my whole live. You know, it's astonishing we knew each other for almost 6 years until we could commit we love each other."
"But it was love at first sight."
"Sure it was, but those damn rules..."
"Sam, do you think we would have all this if we told each other at first sight we were in love?"
"Well, we wouldnt't have been allowed to spend 6 years as partners. No, I don't think so. We both weren't ready for a longterm relationship."
"Maybe you, but I certainly was."
"You were? So then please tell me why any of your realtionships didn't take longer than a few months?"
"Because I never looked into the right one's eyes until the night after the explosion."
Almost 9 months ago Chris had been in Boston to figure out his relationship with Jillian. Meanwhile Rita was working as an lown-out at the narcotics division. She was teamed up with Michael Prize. The night Chris returned from Boston, Rita's and Michael's main suspect went up in a carbomb. Rita was slightly injured. That night they both told each other what they were feeling for each other - something they didn't dare for a long time. They were sitting on the couch in Chris' loft, talking.
"Sam, is there a particular reason that you're not telling me about Boston?"
"Turn around and let me do your shoulders." Chris suddenly changed the subject and began to massage Rita's shoulders. "I'm glad that I went to Boston."
"Uh huh."
"It helped me straight some things out. My feelings were so scrambled every since Jillian left."
"This was what I told you, so?"
"I went there to figure out if I was in love... and I am - but... it's not with Jillian. Every woman that I'd ever been with had always been jealous of you. I am always telling them they just don't understand they way it is between us, but Jillian understood... better than... I did. She said the reason I couldn't commit it to anybody else is because there wasn't enough love left."
Rita took Chris' hand in hers and began to say: "We love each other, but we are not in love, Sam. That is what I told all the men in life."
"That is what we always told each other, and I think that was the truth, but... tonight... holding you so scared my knees were shaking... thinking I am gonna lose you. I realized I've been lying to myself... for a long time..." Chris whispered and kissed Rita.
That night was the first night they spent together - a night that changed their whole life.
"You always pretended this night was a mistake."
"You did the same, Chris."
"Was it really a mistake?"
"I think you can give yourself an answer to this."
"No, it wasn't a mistake. At that time we both were ready to cross the line, something we already wanted to do some years before." Chris said and began to smile.
When someone smiles at you the way Christopher smiles at me you feel you might be something special. You feel safe when you are near this person. It seems as time would stand still for you at this moment. This man is only smiling for you, and you can be sure you are the reason why he is smiling.
"What's so funny, Christopher?"
"Sammy, do you remember this case we had to work on? It was at the Institut For Cosmic Connection."
Suddenly Rita began to smile as well.
"Oh yeah, french kissing for an hour. How can I forget?"
Chris and Rita had to go undercover as a newly engaged couple who had problems in their relationship. At the Institute For Cosmic Connection they had to do certain different kinds of 'training'. One of this was the Soul Search. The had to stare into each others eyes, looking deep into the soul of their partner. Rita couldn't do it. She suddenly realized what Chris ment to her: he'd always been her best friend, most of the good times in her life she'd spent with him - but most scary of all she couldn't think of a future without him. They didn't talk much about the Soul Search and the Soul Kiss - french kissing for an hour - after they'd finished their case. They both knew the rules - nothing physical between partners. If they'd talked this over in details, if they'd talked about their real feelings, they certainly wouldn't have been able to resist what their hearts told them - that they already were in love.
"Sam, I never told you why I couldn't do the Soul Search."
"You don't have to, Rita."
"But I want to. We should think about good times - I saw us eating pizza after we'd solved one of our cases - we should think about bad times - I saw you sitting on my bed when I'd gotten shot - and we should think about the future. I... I couldn't do it. I suddenly realized I couldn't imagine a future without you. That was really scary."
"I realized the same. I think we knew from the beginning that we never would forsake one another. You were the closest friend I ever had, and you still are."
Rita smiled at her husband and gave him a tender kiss on his check, as Chris put his arms around her. He felt the baby kicking Rita.
"Wow, I think he will be a boxer." Chris said as he rubbed Rita's belly.
"He? She!"
"No, no, no, no, and no again. It will be a boy. I just know it."
"Chris, it will be a girl."
"How do you know?"
"How do YOU know?"
"Uh..."
"You know, we never talked about this. You really want to have a son?"
"I think I could teach him playing basketball, football, all that stuff men are doing."
"If we should have a daughter you could teach her playing basketball, and all that stuff you talked about as well."
"Nah, Sam, it wouldn't be the same. I mean... I had to think about that boy who killed his mother's lover."
The first year Chris and Rita worked together they had to work on the murder of a local publisher. Their suspect was his mistress Avery Benton. She had a little boy. Chris spent some time with the boy. He taught him how to be a better baseball player. In some ways the little boy seemed to have found a 'new' dad. His dad had died some years back. When Chris and Rita found the gun of the murder they only found fingerprints of one person on it - the fingerprints of little Randall. He always pretended he only tried to protect his mom as her lover was beating her. Randall was so hopeless after his mom confessed she did kill her lover that he tried to commit suicide in a pool. Chris saved his life.
"I know this boy was something special for you, Chris, but this is our child. No matter if it's a boy or a girl it is part of you and part of me. As time passes by you will discover a lot of your features in this baby."
"I hope the baby will have your understanding, but nevertheless you want to have a daughter."
"Yeah, I would like to have a daughter."
"So? Why?"
"You know, my mom died at my birth, so I had to spend the first 6 years of my life with my dad. He was a great dad. Every night when it was time to go to bed he read me one of the Mother Goose Rhymes. He always called me his little princess. Every little girl is proud of such a father. I know you will be such a good dad as well. Therefore I want a little girl who can be as proud of his father as I was."
"We can first have a boy and then a girl."
"We can also have a girl first and then a boy."
"Nah, Sam, first a boy, then a girl, maybe then a boy again, then a girl..."
"Wait a second. About how many kids are we talking here?"
"At least 4."
"4? Are you crazy, Christopher? 4 kids, uh uh, no way. 2 kids are okay."
"4 kids." Chris said and kissed Rita. "My last word."
"2 kids." Rita replied and kissed him back.
"4."
"2."
"A compromise. 3 kids. This is really my last word."
"3 kids, hmm? That's certainly something we have to talk about AFTER the baby is born. One step after another."
"I don't want our child to be an only child. I was an only child as well as you. I mean, you had Michael when you were older but I had no one. Every child needs brothers and sisters."
"I completely agree with you in this point." Rita said and laid her head down in Chris' lap. Chris brushed her hair softly.
"You are tired?"
"A little bit. I am almost 9 months pregnant and I am looking like a whale!"
"Maybe, but you're still looking gorgeous."
"No, I am not."
"Uh, uh, don't argue with me about that." Chris put his finger on Rita's mouth. "You are still as gorgeous as you were on the day we first met. Even a little more gorgeous because you are expecting our child."
When I met Chris for the first time I thought he was one of those machos. Indeed, he was a macho but not the way I thought. When one of us broke up with their partner, the other one always was there. Chris helped me through the worst time in my life - through my relationship with Eric. When I thought I was pregnant with Eric's baby I always kept asking me one thing: why Eric's baby and not Chris'? Now I am expecting Chris' baby. I've never been so lucky in my whole life.
"Sam, are you sleeping?" Chris asked after awhile.
"Hmm?" Rita replied a little sleepy.
"You didn't say a word for awhile."
"I was just... enjoying all this. It's so peaceful here. I like it here."
"I like it here, too. It reminds me of all the good times in my life we spent together."
"Only good times?"
"Maybe also some bad times, but only this small."
"Good times? When did we ever had good times together?"
"The very first time we almost crossed the line some years ago."
"We almost crossed the line some years ago? Chris, about what are you takling here?"
"You don't remember, Mrs. Wellman?"
"Oh dear..."
What was this case some years ago? The Wellmans, yeah, Chris and Rita undercover. One night they had to share the guestroom in one of their suspects villa. And what did happen? Rita recognized a video camera in the room. So there was only one thing the both of them could do in oder not to let theri suspect recognize they weren't the married coupled they pretended to be... The minute Chris came out of the bathroom, Rita threw him onto the bed and teared the bathrobe he was wearing from his body. They started kissing. Some kisses later their kisses turned into real kisses - they put their feet over the line, but before they could put them on the ground, they put them back behind the line. They looked at each other, knowing that they did something they better shouldn't have done.
"We almost crossed the line... we almost crossed the line!"
"It was scary, wasn't it, Chris?"
"Yeah, it was. You'd always been my best friend, but I suddenly realized there was more between us than just being best friends."
"I know. I realized it, too."
"That's why you didn't want to talk to me about that kiss?"
"I think so. As you said, we almost crossed the line, and we weren't allowed to cross it."
"We were that near to do it."
"Yeah, we were, but we weren't ready, were we?"
"No, I don't think so. If we were, you never would have denied that you felt something while you were kissing me."
"It was too scary for me, Chris. I didn't want to lose your friendship. You were all that I had."
"And you were all that I had."
"Yeah..."
Rita looked at him and brushed his hair.
"Mr. Lorenzo, would you mind changing the subject?"
"Depends about what you want to talk, Mrs. Lorenzo."
"About the baby."
"Oh... no... I wouldn't mind."
"We never talked about a name for the baby."
"Yes, a name. Hmm... a boy... Kevin?"
"Kevin? Uh... Cody."
"Uh, uh... Daniel!"
"What about... Christopher, hmm?"
"Christopher? No way. I am Christopher. Our baby is..."
"Christoper jr.! Really, I like that name. Christopher Lorenzo jr."
"Uh, uh... when I think about it... maybe, but only maybe."
"Okay, that's an arrangement. Christopher jr. if it's a boy, and... Casey if it's a girl."
"Casey? Sam, where do get all those names from? What about Samantha? Our little Sammy, hmm?"
"Samantha Lorenzo... doesn't sound that bad. Christopher if it's aboy, Samantha if its' a girl."
"Oh, Sam, did I tell you what Frannie asked me yesterday?"
"No, you didn't. Where did you meet her?"
"She was at the headquarters some minutes after you went home. She asked me whether we already chose a name for the baby. I said no, and she said, I am quoting, 'why don't you call the baby Frances if it's a girl. I mean I am the godmother anyway.'"
"Frances? She really did say that?"
"Maybe we should do her that honor, Rita. Samantha Frances Lorenzo."
"You're kidding, Christopher, tell me, you're kidding."
"No, no, I ain't... I mean... nah, Sam, not Frances." Chris said and began to laugh loud. "She can be glad she is the godmother. How could I think about naming the baby Frances? Oh, Jesus! Maybe we should call her Samantha Lee. THAT sounds pretty good."
"But only if we call the baby Christopher if it's a boy."
"I know I will repent this some time... but okay. We call the baby Christopher."
"This marriage really seems to work good. A lot of compromises already..."
"It only works so good because we want it to work so good."
"You're right, Christopher, as usual." Rita said and sat up. "Sam, I am a little tired. Please let us go home."
"All you say, sunshine."
They both got up and looked at the waves. Then - suddenly - Chris took Rita's hand in his and looked deep into her eyes.
"Rita Lee, never in my whole life I was so happy, you know that? You're the most beautiful woman in the whole world. In a few weeks a whole new world will begin for us - with our baby. We shouldn't think about what happened years ago. It's the present that counts, every minute I can spend with you and the baby. I love you more than anything else, you know that?"
"Yeah, I know, and I love you, too, Chris, with my heart and soul." Rita replied and kissed him.
Past is past, present is present and future is future. In the past, Chris and I certainly did mix these things up. Past was present for us, future didn't exist. We first needed this baby to let us realize that there was a future for us - together...